A/N: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!. Random story idea I came up with yesterday about Yugi and Mai having really bad V-days, feel free to review and enjoy. Also shout out to "Boonaw" for pointing out a typo in chapter 1, you can find his Fanfiction account and stories here: u/7676414/Boonaw
Belated V-Day
Chapter 1: Bad News
Yugi found a way to separate himself and Yami from each other so they could be two separate entities. The two of them were like brothers: they would do all sorts of stuff like eating ice-cream w/ bacon on top, play video games, watch Kaiju films, listen to Grove Metal and bash shitty knock-off shows like GX and 5D's to name a few.
*Valentine's Day, Tea's apartment*
In other news, Yugi purchased a rather expensive box of chocolates and brought them to Tea's house. But as she welcomed the young Egyptian inside, she gave him some big news.
"YOU'RE MOVING!?" Yugi asked all confused while holding the expensive box of chocolate he had gotten for Tea.
"Yeah I got a job as a table dancer in New York City, I'm moving in a few days!" Tea said while smiling.
"But-but-but-but-but….." Yugi kept tripping, his grip on the chocolate box grew weak.
(Notices the chocolate) "Oh….yeah, sorry Yugi look: you're loyal, kind, smart, brave, funny and wonderful but…to be brutally honest…..I see you as a friend if not a brother." Tea admitted.
Yugi felt like his heart had been ripped out by an Aztec priest in Central America.
"F-f-f-f-f-f-friend?" Yugi said as he dropped the chocolate box while trying not to cry.
"Yugi, being friends is still a wonderful thing, I can't go one episode without a friendship speech. Here…" Tea was about to give a speech.
"Please Tea…..I've memorized all your speeches." Yugi admitted.
"Oh…okay then. Plus, even if I did see you more than a friend, I'd see you as a best friend, and even if I saw you as something more than that well….I already have a boyfriend. Don't worry: I'll be sure to write and send you photos just not the ones of me dancing because those are for my boyfriend! Happy Valentine's Day!" Tea said as she smiled and gave Yugi a hug.
Yugi couldn't help but to hug back, smell her perfume, feel her hug, and body heat, but he knew then and there that he'd never be able to have her, let alone reach 1st base.
(Sigh) "Thanks Tea…..I guess friendship is all one needs on Valentine's Day." Yugi said as he tried to remain positive.
Collecting himself, Yugi said "Farewell", opened the front door, only to find someone was waiting for Tea outside. That someone was Yami who was holding a dozen roses, chocolate and what looked like a box containing an engagement ring.
(Doesn't notice Yugi at first due to his size) "S'up Tea baby! A few more days from now, you and I will rule New York…..(sees Yugi)…oh….. well um…this is quite awkward." Yami admitted.
Yugi wanted to go all Red Army on Yami and Tea's asses.
"ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME?! WE'VE BEEN BEST FRIENDS SINCE SEASON 0 AND YOU TAKE THE ONE GIRL I LOVED MORE THAN THE WHOLE GODDAMN WORLD!? THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT SOMEONE WHO FREED YOU FROM THAT SHITTY-ASS EGYPTIAN PUZZLE?! WHAT IN THE UNHOLY MOTHER OF FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF YOU BACK-STABBING, GIRL-STEALING, JERK-FACE?!" Yugi roared.
"Well to be honest, Tea and I have more in common and didn't want to tell you right away because you'd freak out." Yami answered.
"Yugi…." Tea tried to explain.
"DON'T YOU FUCKING "Yugi" ME! IF TURNING ME DOWN FOR MY BEST FRIEND IS WHAT YOU CALL "friendship" THEN FUCK YOU TEA, FUCK YOU YAMI, FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF…..(looks at Yami and Tea while giving them each a middle finger)FUCK OUR FRIENDSHIPS!" Yugi declared with tears streaming down his enraged face as he stormed out of Tea's apartment while slamming the door, only for him to return 3 seconds later for the chocolate he dropped saying "AND I'M TAKING THESE EXPENSIVE CHOCOLATES BACK!" then he went out and left for good while slamming the door one final time.
*Candy Store*
Despite having a receipt, the chocolate store owner couldn't give a refund because the box was slightly damaged but in reality it was due to the fact the manager owed money to the mob and couldn't afford to lose any cash. So Yugi walked home with the now worthless, expensive chocolate box as it started to downpour.
*Game Kame*
Using a spare key under his doormat, Yugi unlocked the back Game Kame door and walked in. His Grandpa was out clubbing with some ladies at the nearby retirement home (I'll leave it up to you guys if the women were elderly or young nurses or both) his Dad was eaten by a Black Ghost while on a business trip to Lavender Town in the Kanto region several years ago and his Mom was at a "Woman's Book Club Valentine's Day Slumber Party."
Changing into some new clothes, Yugi grabbed the chocolates, went to his room, locked the door and tore up every picture he had of Tea. As he dimmed the lights, his plan was to dance with Tea in his room as Lionel Richie's "Hello" played in the background. But since Yugi was friend-zoned, he played a two-hour loop of Elfen Lied's "Lilium", stripped down to his G1 Power-Ranger underwear, laid down on the floor, curled up in fetal position, and ate the chocolates while sobbing. Needless to say, Valentine's Day really sucked for our hero but as it turns out, someone else was also having a very shitty Valentine's Day.
*Mai's Residence*
Mai was dressed as a slutty princess and had slaved the entire day getting the bedroom set up for her V-day Night w/ Joey Wheeler.
"Now that Joey is back from his month long San Diego trip, he'll be dying to ravish my body and (hears knock on door) right on time!" Mai squealed like a fangirl as she quickly inspected her looks and breath to see that everything was in shape. Satisfied, Mai opened the door… but saw that Joey looked… different. He had long hair, makeup and…. implants.
"OH MAI YOU JUST LOOK SO ABSOLUTELY FAB!" Joey said all flamboyantly as he hugged her.
"Jo….Joe…Joey…..?" Mai kept stuttering.
"Oh fudge…..sorry it looks like you didn't receive my letter…..darn postal service…..anyway hon'….while in San Diego I met some really fabulous people and as it turns out, I decided to be a woman and my new name is Josephine!" The now Josephine declared.
"But-but-but-but-but-but…." Mai said all dumbfounded like Yugi did earlier.
"Mai darling I'm so very, very sorry, if only I had transitioned before we met. Anyway, here have these two tickets to this year's Ricky Martin concert! I'd love to stay and chat but my BF is waiting for me outside, TOODLES!" Josephine waved as he frolicked down the stairs to his bf who happened to be Duke Devlin in a car with the sunroof down. Mai then grabbed a huge bucket, filled it with toilet water, opened a window and dumped it all over the two love birds in their car.
"OH NO DUKE IT'S RAINING POOPY WATER!" Josephine screamed.
"I'LL GET US OUTTA HERE!" Duke replied.
As the dirty car sped off, Mai destroyed everything Joey ever gave her, drank a whole bottle of wine, burned the Ricky Martin tickets before flushing them and cried herself to a drunken sleep.
Needless to say, V-Day sucks when you're single.
A/N: Anyway I know Valentine's day has been over for a while so I decided to use that as the inspiration for this fanfic. Feel free to leave a review. Anyway chapter 2 will explain more and is coming later today!