Okay! So, this is my first Faberry fic so far. Most of my readers are used to me writing Fabrevans when it comes to Glee because they're OTP but I am also very much in favour of this pairing. I would say they're somewhere up there in my favourite ships. Anyway, if you do review please don't be too harsh! My confidence is pretty low as it is when it comes to keeping these two characters in-character around each other! Enjoy.
The midday sun beat down hard on Quinn's head, the light reflecting off her blonde locks are she travelled through the school parking lot. The heat was getting to her as she tried to fondle the bump on her stomach carefully and gently but it was hard when she was in a rush. She'd realised that she'd left half of her homework assignments in Mercedes's car that morning and had asked him for the key, using her free period to get them.
Life was difficult lately. It didn't often happen to her but her emotions had been getting the better of her. Her grades were getting even worse and worse than they already were. She'd discovered that by being kicked out by your parents and moving to 3 different places didn't do well for your grades.
After things hadn't worked out with Puck, things had been toppled upside. She felt worthless and even more so when she looked at the familiar curve of her stomach. How was she supposed to care for a child when she couldn't even care or defend for herself?
Well, she wasn't. She couldn't keep it. She needed to get back on top, where she belonged. But still…
There was a feeling inside of her, something dwelling. Her morals had been changing day by day and she could feel something more coming. She could tell that this wasn't the end. She was going to change her mind about something in someway or another. She just couldn't figure it out yet.
Just as she was approaching the car, she spotted a shadow in the distance. It bare took her a second to distinguish who it was. From the animal sweater in the summer heat, there was no doubt it was Rachel Berry. Quinn had to catch her breath for a moment before taking tentative and slow steps towards the brunette.
She soon discovered there was something different about Rachel - she was frozen, in a pose that was so unlike her. Her usually proud posture was gone and she was hunched over, her hair stringing down from her head unnaturally.
It took a moment for Quinn to realise the yolk of an egg streaming down her face, hair and body. But that wasn't the only thing streaming - there were tears running from her eyes, huge ones. The kind of tears that you cry when you've lost your way or you feel like no one loves you.
A pain began to ache in Quinn's chest like she'd never felt before. She'd never seen Rachel so… broken. Sure, Quinn had taunted and teased her many times, throwing rude insults and pushing her around like she was nothing but Rachel had always taken it on the chin and swore it would make her stronger one day. Well, what if that wasn't true anymore? Clearly something had got to her enough to make her lose that attitude.
A strange urge to help the brunette occurred in Quinn's heart. She had never been the kindest to the girl. In fact, she was sure they'd hardly spoken at all for a long couple of weeks now because she simply didn't have anything nice to say to Rachel. But now… Quinn was retracing her steps. Had she been wrong to pick on Rachel? Should she have accepted her for who she was? Perhaps if she had, the girl wouldn't be so shattered.
Quinn acted on those instincts and approached Rachel boldly. "Rachel?" she called with a curiosity in her voice. "What happened to you? And why are you covered in… egg yolk and shells?"
The blonde waited for a reply but Rachel stared blankly ahead, her eyes still brimming with tears and red underneath. Quinn raised a questioned eyebrow and stood in front of the girl with an expectant look in her eyes. The brunette still ignored her. "Hey!" she shouted finally after Rachel made it clear she was not about to reply, "I'm talking to you!"
For the first time, Rachel looked Quinn in the eyes. Her brown lobes were filled with sorrow and hurt, making Quinn immediately feel awful for yelling at her. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout." she stammered nervously, "Lets go and get you cleaned up - then we can talk."
It took a shove and a lot of convincing with no replies but Quinn finally managed to get Rachel away from that parking lot, completely dismissing any thoughts of her homework assignments or how Mercedes was going to miss her car keys. They could wait.
"Why are you helping me?" Rachel asked quietly, speaking up for the first time as Quinn dabbed gently at the side of her head with a moist towel. "You hate me."
Quinn swallowed the urge to scoff. Did Rachel really think that someone who had been through as much as Quinn was capable of hate? She may pretend like she hated her sometimes but she never had. Not once.
"Does it seem like that?" she finally asked, refusing eye contact and choosing her words carefully. It was quite clear to Quinn that Rachel thought the blonde hated her but she'd always been intrigued to know Rachel's opinion on the matter. Now, she had the chance… even if it meant sitting in the empty girls bathroom and dealing with yolk that was sticky from the heat.
"Well… yeah." Rachel replied, turning to face Quinn so that she could no longer refuse Rachel's eye contact. "All of the time. Do you?" she pushed the question forward again, causing Quinn to feel awfully uncomfortable.
"Does it matter?" Quinn retorted, "I'm helping you, aren't I? Shouldn't you be happy about that?" she was answering Rachel's questions with questions which is often found annoying when other people did to her. She could recall countless times in Ms. Pillsbury's office when that had happened.
Rachel looked away and nodded. "Yeah… thanks." she murmured before turning to face the mirror. She noticed her bloodshot eyes for the first time. It looked like something had died in them - hope. She realised it was hope that had died within her. Someone she had truly loved had betrayed her. How could she be expected to love again after that? Unless.
"May I ask you a question?" Rachel inquired timidly, breaking the pregnant silence that had fallen between the two girls. She turned to face the blonde with a pleading look on her face. Quinn wasn't so sure she wanted to hear the question because it may provoke her emotions but she swallowed her fear and nodded anyway. "Have you ever wanted something to work so bad but were afraid of the consequences, because if it did go wrong there was so much to lose?"
"That's a stupid question…" Quinn murmured, pulling the towel away and playing with her fingers to distract herself.
Still, Rachel continued. "And then if it did go wrong, you were so afraid to tell people because they would say 'I told you so' or laugh at you? Reminding you of why you were in the wrong in the first place?"
Quinn looked up and quirked an eyebrow. "This is about Jesse St. James, isn't it?" Quinn retorted, later realising she'd answered a question with another question again. "He did this to you." it was a statement, not a question.
Rachel looked away and into the mirror again, feeling a small tear run down her face. "Not entirely…" she mumbled quietly enough that Quinn just about heard her. "But have you?"
Quinn furrowed her eyebrows and watched Rachel's reflection rather than her. She studied her face and wondered what the true meaning was behind this. "It's the story of my life…" she finally replied, adding a humourless laugh.
The brunette turned to face Quinn again, the hint of a gentle smile playing on her lips. She tucked a piece of her hair behind her ears and tilted her head to the side slightly. "Do you think I'm stupid for trusting Jesse?"
"I don't judge you…" Quinn replied hastily and adding a firm nod of the head to confirm her beliefs. "But I'd think you're stupid for trusting any boy. They're not worth it - unreliable and idiotic."
Rachel watched the girl in front of her closely, trying to detect any double meaning to the girls words. She could think of one but she was afraid to accuse Quinn of anything in case it was untrue. It may give off another vibe. "I suppose… you've been there."
"I've dated a lot of guys, Rachel," Quinn told, mentally chastising herself because she had advertised herself as a slut, "and none of them really understood me. It didn't feel right. I'd stick with them for the sake of it. Still, it doesn't change the fact that it hurts when they end it. Because they always seem to end it."
"Why are you being so nice to me?" Rachel asked incredulously though keeping the tone of her voice low. "I don't think I've seen you be so kind and understanding to anyone, myself even more so. You're always so insulting."
Quinn swallowed and furrowed her eyebrows. "Gee, thanks." she convincingly hid the tightening of her throat and the burning fire of emotions in her chest by plastering her words with sarcasm. "Maybe I know what it's like to be you now…"
Rachel scoffed. "Okay, Quinn. I know that you've been through a lot but the pain I feel is so much different to yours. People like you, no matter how harsh you treat them. I think I'm in love with someone I can never have and they've hurt me in the past so I have no reason to trust them. But I still do. How does that amount to what your feeling? You simply can't compare them, the contrast is too wide."
Quinn defended herself immediately. "You have no idea what I'm feeling." she raised the tone of her voice as she held a strong front but she was really in pieces inside. Was this the inner change she'd been experiencing but unable to determine? Was she… in love with someone else? And not just a worthless boy… someone who simply didn't want to trust her? Rachel had made it quite clear by her questions that she suspected an ulterior motive behind Quinn's help. She may have been right but if she was accusing then she clearly didn't put full trust into her. Perhaps the terrors of Quinn's past were finally catching up with her. She was changing because of who she was.
Rachel swallowed and looked Quinn defiantly in the eyes. "Why, Quinn? What are you feeling?" it was the first sign of determination she had shown since Quinn had found her and she wasn't entirely faithful in it but she was using it to get something out of Quinn. She wanted her feelings to be returned. She wanted someone to love her because right then, after everything that had happened, she felt like no one did.
"You just don't get it, do you?" Quinn laughed meanly and shook her head in disbelief. "I suppose I can't expect you to either. I mean look at you - you're accusing me of all sorts here. How can you understand? How can you possibly even begin to fathom how I feel?" Rachel remained silent as she watched Quinn's dramatic, emotion outburst. "I shouldn't have helped you. It was wrong of me and… I'll see you later, Rachel."
Just as Quinn was heading for the door, Rachel spun around of her heels and grabbed the blonde's wrist. Both of them could feel the intense amount of electricity crackling between them. It was captivating but both chose to ignore the sexual tension to make it easier for themselves. Neither of them supposed the other felt the same.
"I don't want you to go." Rachel called, the pleading in her voice made apparent. "Please." It broke Quinn's heart to hear those words because they emphasised how broken Rachel was right now. And Quinn had never wanted Rachel to feel like that - never. No matter how many times she tried to embarrass her, it simply wasn't true. In all honesty, she'd done those things to make Rachel hurt her. Perhaps it would have saved her from knowing the truth about how Quinn felt.
Quinn turned around, slowly and gingerly, afraid that she'd see Rachel's chocolate brown orbs and burst into tears. She put on a strong face though, for both of their sake's. "I'm sorry I ever hurt you, Rachel. I don't want you to feel like this." she whimpered slightly as she caught a glimpse of the girl, her eyes growing a coat of saline water.
Rachel's eyes grew sadder, as if it were even possible. She simply didn't know what to say. What if it were true? What if Quinn felt the same and she was just masking her emotions in a harsh façade? Rachel didn't want to build her hopes up just to disappoint herself but she couldn't help it - the feelings were natural and impulsive, no matter how many times people would try to convince her that she was fooling herself.
So, instead of saying words, she acted on her feelings. She fell into Quinn's arms sobbing, forcing the blonde to fall ridged for a moment. The warmth of her body radiating on Rachel's own was suffocating, as was the smell of her perfume. She couldn't explain the emotions she felt as Quinn placed a soft and gentle hand on her back, rubbing it soothingly as they both cried in unity.
"Life is so hard sometimes…" Rachel cried, not quite sure who she was talking to, "and you understand that, Quinn. You understand it better than anyone."
Quinn's fingers shook at an insane pace as she inhaled the scent of Rachel's hair, laying her cheek on the top of her head gently. They both jerked back and forth in tears as their emotions inside of them rattled, angry and desperate to escape into words. They just needed to find the right way to say it.
After a few moments, Rachel reluctantly pulled back. It turned out that she had stained Quinn's white dress with salty tears and black mascara. She gasped quietly as she walked forward to Quinn and touched the spot on her baby bump with the tears had fallen. "I'm so sorry…" she apologised.
Quinn shook it off. What did a dirty dress matter? She'd just held this girl so close. This beautiful girl who she'd taken so long to realise her love for. Why had it taken this long? She should have followed this instincts earlier.
She used her thumb to wipe away the brunette's tears. "It's okay." she whispered softly, terrified that just the touch of Rachel's skin would run her emotions too wild to be contained anymore. "It's okay."
It took a moment but both of them finally shared a knowing glance - they both knew what they wanted. Despite what people would think, they realised the situation they were in. Everything that was coming for them wasn't worth ignoring the feelings they had inside for each other.
And so, Rachel pushed herself up on her toes. She planted a soft kiss on the blonde's lips, holding her shoulders so careful not to trip over. Quinn was surprised to begin with but she went along, kissing Rachel back with just as much need.
Finally, both pulled away on mutual consent and studied each other, trying to read either one's emotions. The truth was that they couldn't read those kinds of emotions because they were too strong to put into words or looks or sometimes even actions. They just knew what they wanted.
"I want to be with you, Rachel." Quinn finally spoke up, her voice breaking with emotion. "I know you feel the same."
Rachel swallowed and nodded, defiantly looking Quinn in the eyes. The look was full of determination - it told Quinn that Rachel was ready for whatever came to get them because as long as they had this love, it was okay. They didn't need the looks that people would give and they didn't care who would voice their opinions or not.
They just wanted each other.
I hope you enjoyed that. I wanted to write really passionately but I hope it didn't come out too angst-y or anything. I love myself some Faberry angst but I don't like overdoing it. Please review! It would be well-appreciated.