Declaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or their characters. I was trying something new from a book I was reading and wanted to try it out (the line across the words) , please review
It will taste like honey, sweet and foreign and forthcoming and addicting. It will feel like stroking a feather around your skin or rolling around in the grass, painless. It will make her heart break like the rain when it collides with the floor, creating million versions of themselves as they do. Her knees will shiver with excitement and her hands will nervously tell them to calm down, while flinching her hair uncontrollably as if it only coaxing it with steady fingers will it stop being in the way like circumstances usually do.
But that is only her assumptions. Those are the things she thinks about when she closes her eyes. When she thinks about sharing a kiss. That is the only thing in her mind and she worries that all her concentration and unawareness is dedicated to that only. That she is wasting her time. Maybe she is. Maybe she is not. It has consumed her so that she cannot remember when she even started thinking about things that have no meaning in her life because nothing can be more meaningless than a kiss. Or at least she tries to convince herself it is. Her status in her village has left her feeling out-casted. She is not quite sure but she thinks she is hearing rumors about her not settling, or worse of how she had never had anyone to kiss.
The only thing that makes her comfortable with herself is having small conversations with her Lord. He does not say much and the silence makes her stay calm within herself because his silence does not judge, has no voice or verdict. And he visits rarely which does not give him time to suspect that she is growing unbalance, or that she is inching towards insanity.
Or that while he makes his short replies she is only staring at his lips….
If she would she would sit herself in a corner and dare to lecture herself. She is shameless and holds no respect for her Lord, who saved her life countless times. While in his visits she pinches herself when she sees his mouth move and how she wonders if they have ever kiss anyone before.
"Rin?" he says.
Rin almost jumps up by the voice of Sesshomaru. If only in the shades of the trees there was a corner. She tries to act unchanged. She fails, but only for a bit. "What, My Lord?"
"You seem distracted." He says.
It will taste like honey.
"I've just been preoccupied lately, that is all," she responds.
He makes a sound with the back of his throat and it reminds her of a humming bird. She blinks distracted. It will be like falling. Like leaves falling from a trees, effortless. It will be senseless. She doesn't understand why it's devouring her not knowing.
"My lord?" she confines with herself for a moment, not sure if she would like to proceed doing what is reeling in her mind like the wheels of Kagome's bike. But she accepts that there's in no turning back. And if there is she does not want to go through it, she doesn't want to turn away. "What is like?"
Her lord turns to her, failing to comprehend the meaning behind what she is trying to say. "What is?"
It will be like the sun waking in the pit of your stomach and it will taste like morning and it will feel like bright days dancing in her eyes. She is feeling just like that. Like long days murmuring old times from the back of her mind.
She closes her eyes because she finds that it's hard to get the words through without feeling like an immature girl. Maybe she is being immature. She knew herself being red.
She whispers "To kiss."
There was silence, mute quiet. Rin was highly aware now that shutting windows to prevent her from seeing was probably a bad idea. What is her Lords reaction, she wouldn't know. She wish she knew and she wish the ground was rumbling. That it will be so hungry that it will consider swallowing her up.
"Rin?" she hears him say.
She slowly opens her eyes and sees that Sesshomaru's exterior is unreadable… and she is afraid. What is he thinking? Does he find her pathetic? Rin under these circumstances did felt pathetic. She felt like laughing and playing it all like a big joke. Does he think it's a joke? Does he-
"Yes, my lord," she says. "I'm sorry I'm so naïve."
"Why does Rin asks me this?"
It will feel like crashing into the water. Shattering.
"Forget I did, my lord." She tries to explain. "It was just a stupid question." Suddenly Rin felt like leaving, like getting up, like momentarily disregarding what happened. She can withdraw everything right, right?
She starts walking away and feeling like she avoided an arrow but it's strange to her… because she feels like she was the only pulling the string. Because of all the things that she thought could have happened she never would have thought it will… feel like dying. Like killing yourself.
It surprises that it still surprises her to see him in one point in time and then unexpectedly see him in another. In front of her.
"Why is Rin leaving without excusing herself?" he says but she is trying to catch her breath. "Are you angry?"
She answers "I'm not."
Sesshomaru does not look convince even though his face is readless. "Are you crossed because you did not get your answer?"
It will be like swallowing nails. Sharp.
"No, my lord/" she says.
He locates both hands on her shoulder. "Rin was never a great liar."
No I'm not, she wants to tell him but then he leans in but then-