Chapter 1
Way out in the farthest outskirts of space, in a large tree floating in a nebula, rested the God of Destruction, known as Lord Beerus, and his teacher known as Whis. Alongside the God of Destruction rested an evil threat known as Steven Universe. Whis was a tall humanoid figure with blue skin, a tall hairdo, and a robe with a ring around the neck and back. He walked through the tree, with many different corridors where different bombs were going off. He walked into a room where Beerus and Steven were sleeping on floating beds.
Whis: Beerus. Steven. It's time for you to get up.
Beerus was a tall, purple, hairless cat, and he wore a white robe as sleepwear. Steven was a small, chubby child with curly hair, and he wore sandals, jeans, and a red shirt with a yellow star on it.
Beerus: What? Has it been 39 years already?
Steven: Obviously.
Whis: I just don't want you two sleeping in for another 15 years. But, if you need more rousing…
Whis pulled out a microphone.
Whis: I'm always happy to show off my vocal range with a singing performance.
Whis began singing off-key causing feedback.
Beerus and Steven: WE SAID WE'RE UP!
Beerus: It's just so comfortable.
Beerus and Steven floated out of bed, landing on the ground.
Beerus: To get a full sleep we'd need at least 50 years. 39 is nothing more than a catnap.
Whis: It was you two who set the alarm bombs to go off at this time. Why?
Steven: Something I need to check.
Later, Steven and Beerus were eating at a grand buffet.
Steven: Tell me, Whis. Did that upstart, Majin Buu, manage to eradicate those planets for us?
Whis: Yes. Without a trace.
Steven: Glad to hear it. Someone needs to be destroying planets in our slumber. Remind me to thank him.
Whis: Impossible, I'm afraid. In your absence, someone destroyed his evil half.
Steven did a spittake.
Steven: Bppftfhft. What?! Someone more powerful than Majin Buu?!
Whis: Allow me to show you.
Whis pulled out his staff and projected footage of Majin Buu fighting a small, pink, puffy alien.
Whis: The creature he battled was known as Kirby. He's a star warrior.
Steven: I thought the star warriors were wiped out in the battle against Nightmare.
Whis: Yes, but this one escaped. It's at least 200 years old, but it was supposed to awaken 1000 years after the battle for everything that ever was.
Steven: Something seems off about this. Two childish, pink planet destroyers meeting in one place at the same time? Coincidence? I think not.
Whis: Well, it was set up by these two.
The projection showed two people observing the battle from a levitating booth. One was a scientist with green glasses and a cybernetic arm, while another was a redneck with a plaid shirt and a shotgun.
Steven: Those two look delightfully foolish. What are their names?
Whis: The scientist refers to himself as Wizard and the one with the weapon is Boomstick. They take two beings from alternate realms, and force them to battle to determine a winner.
Steven: That might be interesting. How many winners have been established?
Whis: About 42.
Steven: Hmm.
Steven touched an egg he was holding, turning it into dust.
Steven: Where do the winners reside? They must be powerful combatants and I must know their potential.
Whis began showing different universes. The worlds of Metroid, multiple versions of Earth, Dreamland, different galaxies in space, but then it landed on a shot of a land known as Equestria. Steven began freaking out.
Steven: AHHH! TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!
Whis quickly shut down the monitor. Steven began rubbing his eyes.
Steven: That was so much happiness and sunshine in one place it made my eyes hurt. How did they win one of the battles? Beerus. Do me a favor and destroy that world for me, would you?
Beerus: With pleasure.
Steven: That much happiness in my mind. I have to think of something evil to balance out. Eh, "Puppies and kittens burning in fire." Ah. That's better.
Beerus: You are a very disturbed young man.
Steven: I know. But I'm no worse than you. You destroyed a planet after losing a game of hide and seek.
Beerus: So we're even.
Steven: So, most of the combatants reside on Earth?
Whis: That is correct. Some are saiyans capable of transformation into super saiyan.
Steven: What was that? Super saiyan. Super saiyan. Ah. That's it.
Whis: What?
Steven: The reason I set the alarms to go off after 39 years. It was super saiyan something. Super saiyan...god! A super saiyan god! I had a dream about it. And in it I fought a super saiyan god. It was a premonition! A premonition!
Whis: No offense, but your "premonitions". They don't have a history of coming to fluition. Need I remind you about the popstar dream?
Steven: You're mocking me, aren't you? Fine. Let's see what the seer has to say.
Steven, Whis and Beerus walked out to the open area.
Steven: Seer? Seer?
A floating orb with a fish inside named Seer flew downward.
Seer: What is it?
Steven: 39 years ago, did you not prophesize, that in 39 years an arch rival worthy of me would appear?
Seer: Did I say that?
Steven: Yes you did.
Seer: Huh. Guess I did.
Steven: See. He confirms my premonition. A super saiyan god will appear before me as my archrival. That's why I set the alarms to go off early.
Whis: Mystery one solved.
Steven: Soon, a super saiyan god will appear on Earth as one of the saiyan combatants.
Whis: "Super saiyan god". "Super saiyan god". Such a grand, over-the-top title. Sounds tacky if you ask me.
Whis looked into his staff, and saw the location of the saiyans on Earth.
Whis: They are in a small city known as "West City".
Steven: Alright then.
Whis: But the most powerful of the combatants is currently on the planet of the North lower Kai.
Steven: Interesting. How long does it take us to get there?
Whis: 26 minutes.
Steven: So about the length of your average anime episode. I hate long flights. But what choice do I have. I'll suck it up and go.
Whis: Very well. We depart at once.
Meanwhile, in another quadrant of the universe, the North Supreme Kai and his assistant Kabitokai had felt Steven awaken. He watched over the north quadrant of the universe.
N. Supreme Kai: So, you felt it too?
Kabitokai: Yes. He's certainly awake early this time.
N. Supreme Kai: We must alert the lower Kais.
Kabitokai: I'll do it at once.
Kabitokai telepathically contacted the lower North Kai. He lived on a smaller world where a saiyan combatant named Goku was training.
North Kai: I hear you Supreme Kai. Loud and clear.
Goku was jogging along the small planet.
North Kai: Goku. Pant quieter!
Kabitokai: Wait. Goku is there. We can't let them know about each other. If one finds out about the other…
North Kai: Yes. Yes. Mum's the word on Lord Steven.
North Kai cut off telepathy with Kabitokai.
Goku: Who's Lord Steven?
North Kai: Ah! He's nobody!
Goku: Couldn't be that. You wouldn't be so nervous about it.
North Kai: Look, truth is. It's a secret. Classified Kai stuff.
Goku: Aw! Now I have to know. That sounds juicy.
North Kai: Drop it Goku. I'm not telling you.
Goku: Ok. You were talking to Supreme Kai, right? I'll go ask him myself.
North Kai: Gyah! Alright I'll tell you! No instant transmission and we'll talk!
Later, the two were having a lunch.
North Kai: Just promise you won't tell the Supreme Kai I told you. In the universe, there are beings whose job is to protect and watch over and create. There was one whose job was to destroy. His name was Beerus. Until one day, he met a child who equalled and almost overpowered Beerus. His name is Steven Universe. Now he is also a God of Destruction.
Goku: So he's bad. He's one of the evil destroyer guys?
North Kai: It's not a matter of evil. Balance. Creation and destruction keep each other in check. But he is bad news in some aspects.
On the Supreme Kai world…
N. Supreme Kai: I wonder how many worlds will fall victim to his wrath this time.
Kabitokai: 39 years. Crazy to believe it.
N. Supreme Kai: A few decades of calm. Is that so much to ask?
On North Kai's world, Goku had gotten dressed in his fighting clothes.
North Kai: Uh, Goku. Why are you wearing your buttkicking clothes?
Goku: So a God of Destruction has to be pretty powerful, right?
North Kai: Sort of a job requirement, yes.
Goku: I can't wait to see what he's made of. This is great.
North: You're completely brain dead!
Goku: Why? What'd I do?
North Kai: Were you even listening to half of what I just told you?! Steven the Destroyer is the most powerful force in the universe! It's in his name! He's at a level you didn't even know existed! He's so moody he'll wipe out a solar system if someone looks at him funny! The Supreme Kais even pee their pants if they're in the same quadrant! Are you listening to me?!
Goku: I heard the part about how he's the strongest. And I can't wait.
North Kai: Goku. We're in for some trouble. And it's headed this way! Steven's coming!
Goku: What? I can't sense him.
North Kai: Because you can't sense deities! Remember. Above all else. Refrain from doing anything stupid!
Goku: How hard can that be?
North Kai: Just get in the house!
Goku: What? Why?
North Kai: Just do it!
Goku: Man. Would it kill you to say please?
North Kai: Hurry!
Goku: Alright. Alright.
Goku walked into the house.
North Kai: Why is he headed here? It doesn't make any sense.
Steven: Why indeed, North Kai.
Steven arrived, with Whis in front of him. Goku saw Whis first.
Goku: Is that Steven? He does look powerful.
Steven walked out from behind Whis.
North Kai: Oh. Uh. Steven. How. Uh. Nice of you to come to my planet.
Steven: It's been a while hasn't it?
Goku: Wait, that's Steven? He looks like nothing more than a chubby kid.
Steven: I must say. Your world...it's on the small side.
Whis: Long ago, you and North Kai were in a rather spirited game of hide and seek. You lost, so you destroyed this world.
Steven: Really, Whis. I did that? You must have made it to be smaller. Must like the small space.
North Kai: Eh he. Yes. Well. Why are you here?
Steven: There's a matter I'd like to discuss with the saiyan you're harboring!
Goku: Busted!
North Kai: Oh. Of course. Where are my manners? Come on out Goku.
Goku jumped out of the window and ran up to Steven.
Goku: Hey, kid. My name's Goku. And I'm a super saiyan…
North Kai smacked him on the head.
North Kai: I thought you'd say something like that. This is the God of Destruction. Show some respect!
Steven: Hey! That's not nice! He was saying hello and being himself! What's wrong with that? Keep that up and I'll destroy you.
North Kai: My apologies, Steven.
Goku: Um. My name is Goku. It's awesome to meet you.
Steven: I suppose so. Anyway, I heard it was you who fought against...what was his name?
Whis: Superman.
Steven: Yeah. You weren't determined the winner, but many believe it should've been you.
Goku: Yeah. That was me.
Steven: Now have you ever heard of something called a super saiyan god?
Goku: No. That's not ringing any bells, kid.
North Kai: I must admit, it's the first time I've heard the name, super saiyan god.
Steven: Too bad. Whis, are the saiyans on Earth also capable of going super saiyan?
Whis: Yes. All of them.
Steven: Alright. Goku. I would like to test your power in a sparring match.
Goku: Really? Awesome! I've heard that you're pretty powerful. We could go one on one in a sparring match, even for a minute!
Steven: Then come at me with all your power.
Goku: Wait, you want all of my power right off the bat? I don't want you to get ticked off and to destroy this planet.
Steven: You have my word.
North Kai: Awwww no!
Goku powered up, and his black spiky hair shot up turning blonde.
Goku: First, I go super saiyan.
He powered up, creating sparks around him.
Goku: Then I go super saiyan 2.
He powered up a third time, and his hair turned into spiky gold, and it grew down the waist.
Goku: Then I go super saiyan 3.
Steven: Impressive. It's somewhat intimidating.
Goku: It's awesome, right? If you want I could dial it back to 2 for you.
Steven: No, that won't be necessary. Now try your best.
Goku: Still doubt me? Fine!
North Kai: Hold on to your bananas, Bubbles!
North Kai and his pet ape, Bubbles ran into the house.
Goku flew forward towards Steven, teleported behind him and threw a punch. Steven grabbed the punch from behind him, throwing Goku over. When Goku recovered, Steven was standing in front of him. He flicked Goku in the head, knocking him back. Goku flew out of the crater, seeing Steven beckon him forward. He shot down throwing a number of punches that Steven dodged. He ended up standing right behind Goku, who then threw a massive punch that Steven teleported away from. Goku's punch blew a hole in the planet, shocking North Kai. Steven suddenly flew through the smoke, behind Goku, karate chopped his neck, and that knocked Goku unconscious.
Steven: Alright. Let's go to Earth, Whis. North Kai. I bid you good day.
Steven and Whis warped out of the planet while North Kai rushed to Goku's side.
North Kai: You got your butt kicked dumb dumb. Just be glad you weren't killed. I gotta warn someone that Earth is in danger.
On Earth, the other saiyan combatant, Vegeta was training in control. His wife, Bulma was having a birthday party with all of Earth's defenders. In Vegeta's training facility, North Kai contacted him, disrupting his training.
North Kai: Hey, Vegeta! Can you hear me?
Vegeta: This had better be really damn good.
North Kai: My message is extremely important. Steven the destroyer is coming to Earth.
Vegeta: Steven? I know that name. I think I remember that name from when I was a kid.
North Kai: Well, he's awake, and was strong enough to beat the God of Destruction, Beerus. He just fought Goku, and he's now unconscious in a crater.
Vegeta: Woah, what? Kakarot is down?
North Kai: He went super saiyan 3 and everything but he's barely breathing after Steven landed two blows.
Vegeta: You're serious? Two blows?
North Kai: The fate of the world is in your hands. Don't screw up.
Bulma's party was being attended by their friends, Goku's son: Gohan, the alien: Piccolo, Krillin, Yamcha, Goku's other son: Goten, Vegeta and Bulma's son: Trunks, Tien, Chiaotzu, Yamcha's talking cat: Puar, talking pig: Oolong, Ox-king, Bulma's parents, Android 18, Marron, Hercule, the good side of Majin Buu, Gohan's wife: Videl, Old Master Roshi, Goku's wife: Chi-Chi and other alien: Dende.
Bulma: Not coming? How could Goku not be coming on my birthday to train.
Piccolo: You really need to ask that?
Bulma: I sent him an invite more than six months ago.
Gohan: Where's Vegeta?
Bulma: Probably training. I've had it with you saiyans.
Krillin: Between you and me, how old are you today?
Bulma: Like I'd tell you. Never ask a woman that.
Android 18: Is it true the prizes for bingo include a castle and a diamond?
Bulma: Yeah, but if it's too much trouble I can get you money instead.
Chi-Chi: One of the perks of being the richest person in the world. I just hope Goku will drop in for the bingo tournament.
Master Roshi: I don't suppose a prize would be any dirty movies or…
Bulma: No!
Bulma saw Vegeta sitting in his combat gear under the shade.
Bulma: Hey Vegeta. What are you doing here. You look even more sullen than usual. Sad that humans do this thing called aging and your wife's a year older?
Vegeta: SHUT UP!
Everyone gasped.
Bulma: It's my birthday, jerk! What's up your butt?!
Vegeta: I can't shake this pit in my stomach. Can I, prince of saiyans, really be afraid?
Steven: Hello, Vegeta.
Vegeta: Huh?
Steven: You've grown to become quite the warrior.
Vegeta began scrambling the area to find Steven. He suddenly saw Steven and Whis sitting under an umbrella. The very sight of Steven frightened Vegeta.
Steven: Don't tell me you forgot about me.
Vegeta: Oh, I remember perfectly now.
Steven: Wasn't your father the one who placed a massive bounty in honor of my arrival?
Vegeta: Uh, yes.
Steven: Hm. What is that smell? Are you having a party?
Vegeta: Yes. It's my wife's birthday.
Steven: The prince married! You must introduce me so I can pay my respects!
Whis: Steven.
Steven: Right. Can't forget why I'm here. In all your travels through time and space, have you ever heard the phrase super saiyan god?
Vegeta: Super saiyan god?
Steven: So no.
Whis: Is it possible you could've been wrong about the "premonition"?
Steven: I never get such things wrong!
Whis: Replace "never" with "always".
Steven: You're putting me into a bad mood, Whis.
Bulma: So this is who you'd rather hang out with instead of your wife?
Bulma walked from behind them.
Vegeta: Oh, Bulma! This is, Steven and…
Whis: Please, ma'am. Call me Whis.
Bulma: Well, I'm Bulma, Vegeta's wife, AKA the birthday girl.
Steven: Who knew Vegeta would meet such a lovely lady?
Steven held and kissed Bulma on the hand.
Bulma: Wow! When did you make friends with people with such good manners! Oh, wait. You're probably aliens or something, right?
Vegeta: Ok, bye!
Vegeta pushed Bulma the other direction.
Steven: I'd hate to impose, but history shows I don't pass up a party.
Bulma: Well come on in. The more the merrier!
Steven and Whis followed Bulma to the party with Vegeta behind. For the time, Steven and Whis appeared to be greatly enjoying themselves and the food. At one point, Bulma got on stage to make an announcement.
Bulma: It's time for the bingo tournament!
Multiple actors began bringing out the prizes.
Bulma: Each of these fantastic prizes can be yours if you win the bingo tournament! First prize is a complete set of the dragonballs!
She revealed 7 orange orbs with red stars in them.
Steven: Those "dragon balls". They are very similar to the wish orbs of planet Namek. If I recall, gathering the orbs allows you to summon a dragon that grants you a wish.
Meanwhile, Gohan was playing a game with Yamcha. Yamcha would shoot Gohan with a pistol and Gohan would attempt to block it.
Steven: Hm. They are about to play a game with a gun? I must see this.
Gohan: Now don't shoot once. Empty the whole clip and aim for my chest.
Krillin: Gohan must've been hitting the sake hard. He's not normally this cocky.
Yamcha fired the gun, and Gohan charged his ki energy, strengthening his body, allowing him to block and deflect every bullet with his finger.
Videl: Ah! I'm hit!
Videl was hit in the leg with a bullet. Everyone surrounded her.
Gohan: Ah! Videl!
Chi-Chi: Gohan! You're stupid game almost got your wife killed!
Gohan: I'm so sorry!
Dende: Let me see her.
Dende knelt down, putting healing energy into the wound, fixing the leg.
Videl: It's like it never happened.
Chi-Chi: Gohan. I don't want you drinking anymore sake!
Gohan: Yes ma'am.
Vegeta: What did you think, Steven?
A bullet had hit Steven in the forehead, and it crushed against his strengthened body.
Steven: One of those projectiles hit me.
The bullet fell off of his head, and he grabbed it, then crushed it.
Steven: It itches, like a bite from a bug that I must crush.
Whis: I take it you're in a bad mood. Will you destroy Earth?
Steven: I'd prefer it as renewing so it may reach its potential.
Steven released the shavings of the bullet, charging his energy.
Steven: Of course, before creation there must come destruction!
Vegeta: Alright everyone, listen up!
Vegeta ran on stage.
Vegeta: The emergency is over! Now, it's time for the main event of Bulma's birthday, the bingo tournament.
A song began playing and Vegeta danced to it on stage.
Vegeta: Bingo! Bingo! Fun time Bingo! Earth is a fine place to be. The food is tasty too yum! Let's go playo. Let's be friendso! Fun time Bingo. Time to play some bingo, ole!
Whis: Well that was certainly something.
Steven: Indeed. I never figured Vegeta for such a poor song and dance routine, but he'd give you a run for your money.
Whis: Now you're just being hurtful. Do you want to make another orbit around planet buffet table?
Steven: Why not?
Vegeta: It seems to have worked for now. I just have to keep him happy until he leaves.
Whis: I say, Steven. Have you had a chance to sample this delicous concotion called pudding? It looks like sludge but tastes like otherworld.
Steven: Pudding you say? I must try it.
Steven and Whis walked to the buffet table, and the pudding was gone.
Whis: It was here a moment ago.
Steven: Maybe you got carried away and ate the whole thing.
Whis: No. I...oh wait.
Whis saw Good Buu eating the last of the pudding. Whis and Steven walked over.
Steven: Excuse me, kindly hand over a cup of pudding.
Whis: One for me too!
Steven: If you can't spare two I'll just take mine.
Whis: Steven. That hardly seems fair.
Steven: You made it sound like you already had one. Please give me the pudding.
Buu: No. Pudding is all for Buu!
Steven: What?
Buu: All pudding is for Buu!
Steven: You're being a rude guest!
Buu: Pudding always comes to Buu!
Buu licked all the pudding cups. Steven began playing tug of war with the pudding tray.
Steven: I want the pudding!
Buu: No mine!
Steven: Give it to me!
Buu: No!
Steven: Give me one you dumb blob!
Buu swallowed the whole tray.
Buu: You call Buu dumb! Now Buu turn you into candy and eat you!
Vegeta: Come on. I take my eyes off for one second!
Steven: You've made me MAD!
Steven charged his energy to max as Buu attacked. Steven easily blasted Buu away with one hand.
Bulma: A fight?
Vegeta: Lord Steven. Stop please!
Roshi: Come on boys! Let's roll!
Android 18, Tien, and Piccolo attacked Steven. Steven teleported behind 18, knocking her out from behind, grabbed Tien and threw him over, blocked Piccolo's kick, hitting him in 2 pressure points to knock him out. Steven flew over and picked up Buu.
Steven: This is what happens when mortals don't share their pudding!
Gohan flew in from behind.
Gohan: That's enough!
Gohan grabbed Steven in a full nelson, but Steven through Gohan over, crashed Buu's head into Gohan's, then kicked them both away.
Vegeta: No point in holding back now!
Vegeta charged up and attacked Steven, but he got assaulted with a barrage of attacks, and knocked out easily. Goten and Trunks performed a technique that fused them into a single being known as Gotenks.
Gotenks: Yeah!
Gotenks flew up to Steven.
Steven: Vegeta is highly skilled, but lacks the power to match me.
Gotenks: Hey kid! Let's do this! An uninvited guest with manners so bad he starts a fight over pudding deserves to have Gotenks' fist rammed down his throat!
Steven: How sad. You mortals have no idea how lucky you are to know the delight of pudding, but for me it's a taste always just beyond grasp. At least for the last five minutes! Pudding! Oh even the name is resplendent and flowing delicousness!
Gotenks: God. I thought you'd never shut up!
Gotenks charged only to take a knee, fist, and palm to the face. He then flew to Vegeta.
Vegeta: I knew you'd be the strongest opponent I've ever faced. But I still didn't think it'd be over this quickly. This sucks.
Steven: I don't get pudding, the super saiyan god is nowhere to be found, and last I still need to find a worthy challenge. The planet must be punished!
Steven warped in front of Vegeta.
Vegeta: I'll take some pride in that it took the God of Destruction to kill me.
Steven: What a great way to rationalize your death.
Steven prepared to shoot an energy bolt into Vegeta.
Bulma: Alright that's enough!
Bulma was behind Steven.
Bulma: I don't care for how long you and my husband have known each other! You're selfish pudding fight has ruined my 38th birthday party!
Krillin: Oh, so that's how old she is!
Bulma came up and slapped Steven. Steven came up, then slapped Bulma, knocking her into the floor. Vegeta was shocked with rage boiling with in him.
Vegeta: How dare you! That's my BULMA!
Vegeta exploded in an aura of energy, tearing up the ground around him.
Vegeta: You BASTARD!
He flew towards Steven, resisting his punch.
Steven: Huh?
Vegeta smashed through Steven's defense with a punch to the face, a kick to the face, a punch to the stomach, then a massive kick to the stomach that sent Steven flying away.
Roshi: This is incredible! Vegeta's anger over Bulma getting hit has made him even stronger than Goku!
Vegeta attacked Steven with multiple hypersonic blows, knocked him into the air, and charged up an energy blast in his hands.
Vegeta: TAKE THIS!
The beam caused an explosion that left a cloud of smoke.
Vegeta: Is he…
When the smoke cleared, Steven was unscathed from the attacks.
Steven: Impressive. But it only proves you aren't the super saiyan god after all. I shall leave but only after destroying the Earth. Whis now!
Whis was enjoying a sushi plate and flew up to Steven.
Whis: Yes, Lord Steven?
Steven: You were right about the super saiyan god prophecy. It was just a dream. Mark my words I won't return home until this planet is destroyed!
Whis: Ok. But first I finish eating, ok?
Whis flew down to finish his sushi plate.
Vegeta: No! I won't let you do it! Why must you always destroy?
Steven: Don't stall Vegeta. I've made up my mind.
Steven jabbed a finger to Vegeta's forehead, knocking him out.
Krillin: Vegeta!
Bulma: Vegeta, no!
Vegeta hit the ground hard.
Steven: Whis! Come on!
Whis: Alright! I'm coming!
Whis flew to Steven's side. Steven charged up a massive orb of energy, preparing to drop it on the planet's surface, when two figures warped into the scene. One of the figures was a 8 foot tall, dragon-like creature, with large wings, glowing purple eyes, gleaming metallic claws, a large blade on the tip of it's tail, and bone colored spikes that adorned it's face and ran down it's spine.
The other landed in a crouch- like position. His spotted fur looked like spikes. He stood up and his fur withdrew back into his skin; showing his porcelain -like skin and long shaggy black hair that just ended past his shoulders. He had bright yellow eyes and bared his fang-like teeth.
Steven: Always something.
Figure 2: You fucking got us lost! You stupid amphibian!
Figure 1: I'm a reptile! Not an amphibian! And I didn't get us lost, I know exactly where we are!
Figure 2: Oh where are we? It looks like a friggin trash bin!
Figure 1: Who the hell are you?
The apparently female, dragon-like creature turned to Steven, her purple eyes glowing like a black light.
Steven: Steven Universe. God of Destruction.
Figure 1: Woooooooow, Steven Universe, the God of Destruction. Adorable! I'm Mimic, She-Who-Does-Not-Give-A-Shit-About-Gods.
Figure 2: We don't care about special Steven! We are in a mess of our own. Now pay attention and get us to where we are actually needing to go!
He stomped his foot in annoyance and started to pace.
Mimic: Calm down kitty, don't go throwing a tantrum in public. Its embarrassing.
Figure 2: Don't call me kitty, my name is Spikes! Now you wanna know what's so freaking embarrassing? You can't get us anywhere we actually need to go!
Spikes released razor sharp titanium claws and clenched his hands into fists not caring that he was cutting into himself. Mimic glared at him, hissing.
Mimic: I hate cats.
Spikes: I heard that! You want to know what i hate? Amphibians like you!
Spikes bared his titanium fang like teeth.
Mimic: If you call me an amphibian one more time I will beat the living shit out of you.
Steven: Will you two just shut up and tell me who the hell you are and why you're here!
Spikes: This idiot screwed up, why don't you ask her? And if you ever tell me to shut up again I will fucking claw you!
Mimic: For the record, I'm much more intelligent than you.
Spikes: Oh, really? At least I didn't transport to this dump!
Mimic turned to Steven, ignoring Spikes' comment.
Mimic: Are you the ruler of this planet?
Steven: No. Frankly I was seconds away from turning this planet to dust before you arrived.
Spikes: Don't ignore me Mimic. And you should have, this is a stupid dust bucket.
Spikes shifted back and forth into his leopard self and to his human self before sneezing cutely like a baby cat. Mimic failed to stifle a laugh.
Mimic: You sneeze like a kitten.
Spikes: Don't you ever make fun of me.
Spikes cuffed her on the back of her head while purring loudly and adorably reminding everyone of a kitten. Mimic snarled, raking her claws down his arm. Spikes leaped on her and scraped his sharp claws down Mimic's face cutting it open. Mimic disappeared, reappearing a few feet away. She turned back to Steven, again ignoring Spikes.
Mimic: What planet is this?
Whis: Earth. This is the planet Earth. Now Steven did ask you a question first. Who are you and where are you from?
Spikes: We already told you our names! We won't repeat it to someone like you. You do not need to know where we are from!
Steven shot toward Spikes. Time froze for a moment, and Steven delivered a giant uppercut that sent Spikes into the air. He then grabbed Spikes from falling.
Steven: Tell me where you're from, or meet the pavement in 3 seconds.
Spikes ignored him and buried his claws on his shoulder and his fangs in his neck but now deep enough to kill him.
Spikes: I do not kill children nor let them tell me what to do.
Steven: Pity.
Steven pulled Spikes' claws from his neck, kicking him away, teleporting in his path, then slamming him into the floor. Spikes roared and clawed his face leaving dozens of bloody scratch marks. He then spun around and bit into Stevens leg until he reached the bone and then jumped off.
Spikes: Again, I do not kill children. Even brats like you.
Steven held up his hand, charging an orange orb of energy in his hand. The orb began to grow and expand until it was the size of Spikes. He fired the beam at Spikes, evaporating him to dust.
Steven: I hope you understand who you're dealing with.
Mimic flicked her snake-like purple tongue out of her mouth for a moment, then paced up to the two of them, eyeing Steven over as if she were sizing him up.
Whis: He is the God of Destruction, so I would advise respect.
Mimic: Let's try to be civil, shall we?
Mimic growled in annoyance, scraping the tip of her bladed tail along the floor, creating a nail-on-chalkboard sound. She smirked, displaying her wicked fangs.
Steven: You. Uh, Mimic, is it? You seem to be more cooperative as of right now. Where did you and the one with bad manners come from?
Mimic: Earth, actually.
Steven: Is that so? Where did you teleport in from just now? Couldn't have been Earth, you could've just flown for that.
Mimic: Russia.
Steven: Ok. Give me your whole story. Why you came here, what you were running from, where you were trying to go, your origin story, all that stuff.
Mimic: Well… Its a long story but i'll try to make it short. I was created in a laboratory somewhere in Arizona by a lunatic. I pledged to destroy all of humanity, considering they're an awfully stupid race, and because I hate humans. I don't feel a need to explain anything else.
Steven: Your ear. What's on your ear?
Mimic narrowed her eyes at Steven, her ear subconsciously twitching.
Mimic: Nothing of importance.
Steven flew closer to Mimic, looking at the tag on her ear. Marked on it was "Combatant #088. Property of Death Battle."
Steven: Whis?
Whis: Yes, Steven?
Steven: Earlier you were telling me about two people that take fighters from other worlds, putting them in a battle to the death. What was the entire scenario called?
Whis: It was called "Death Battle".
Steven: That's what I thought. You're one of the combatants. Who were you set to fight?
Mimic: An anthro named Spikes.
Steven: Oh! The one with bad manners. Ok. Can you take me to where the ones called Wiz and Boomstick reside?
Mimic: Perhaps.
Steven: I know that voice. You want something in return.
Mimic: Yes, I do. What have you got to offer me?
Steven: We both hate humans. I'll give you a front row seat as I wipe this planet off the face of the cosmos.
Mimic smirked demonically, her purple tongue flicking out in the manner of a snake.
Steven: Do we have a deal?
Mimic: Yes, I believe we do.
Steven: Whis, you can head home now. Mimic and I will handle the rest.
Whis: Very well. When you're through, just come home, and I will have your bed prepared.
Whis warped off the planet while Steven turned to the people he had defeated.
Steven: It seems like luck has bought you some time. I'll be back to this spot to destroy the earth. Mimic, where are the ones known as Wiz and Boomstick?
Mimic: Northern galaxy, quadrant A.
Steven: Very well. Let's pay the two of them a little visit.
Mimic placed a hand on his shoulder, her eyes glowing as she teleported them to the location.
On the outskirts of the universe, a spaceship was traversing the stars. Inside were scientist Wizard and redneck Boomstick.
Wizard: Where are the combatants? They were supposed to be here an hour ago!
Boomstick: I know! I had an awesome joke about that dragon-bird thing relating to Jurassic park. It would've been funny!
Mimic and Steven warped onto the bridge of the ship.
Steven: Greetings. My name is Steven Universe. God of Destruction.
Mimic: You may call me Mimic.
Wizard: Combatant #088! About time you came.
Boomstick: Yeah. Wait. Where the hell is the leopard thing?
Mimic: Lunch.
Boomstick: He's out to lunch?
Wizard: No. I think what she means is that he became her lunch.
Steven: Yep. Now, where do you keep files about combatants?
Wizard: For what purpose?
Steven: Just so I can fight and kill them.
Boomstick: Hey! That sounds like profit! Can we film you killing these people?
Steven: I don't see why not. Just take me to the worlds of the different combatants.
Wizard: And if we don't?
Steven charged an orb of energy, killing a worker with it.
Wizard: What are your orders?
Steven: I just told you. Take us to the combatants.
Boomstick: Plotting a course for the world of Metroid.
The ship turned and warped to a destination. In the world of Metroid, the bounty hunter known as Samus Aran was battling a purple alien dragon named Ridley. Suddenly, Samus was warped out of the battlefield.
Samus was warped into a room with many screens adorning the walls and floor.
Samus: What? Where am I?
Wiz, Boomstick, Mimic, and Steven appeared through a door.
Wizard: This is a combat arena room. We can simulate and create any environment from this very room.
Boomstick: Anything that allows both combatants to use their full power.
Mimic: Can we get to the killing yet?
Steven: Yes. They brought you here so that we can battle. I've been waiting for a worthy challenge.
Samus: I remember this place from when I had to fight that other bounty hunter, but why do I have to fight a kid?
Steven: My form may trick one into believing I'm a child, but I've been alive longer than you can comprehend. I sleep for about 50 years at a time. My last nap was for about 39 years.
Samus: Ok. So you're immortal, but how do I know you're a challenge?
Steven: We will know when we fight. Wiz. Boomstick. Set up the battle.
Wiz: Right away.
Wiz, Boomstick, and Mimic moved to the watch booth, where the screens were changed to display a new environment.
Wiz spoke on the intercom.
Wiz: What scenario do you want?
Samus: Set it to...a volcano pit.
Wiz and Boomstick set it up to mimic a volcanic terrain.
Samus: You sure you want all of my gear?
Steven: Yes. Attack already.
Samus: You asked for it.
Samus charged up her arm cannon, firing a laser shot. Steven dodged the laser shot, hitting a rock, causing lava to seep in.
Samus: Interesting. Fast enough to dodge laser fire.
Samus fired a grapple beam, attaching to Steven, allowing her to pull him towards her. He used the momentum to clothesline Samus, trip her up with a sweep kick, then while she was in the air, slam her away. She leapt off the wall, charging her energy into a screwattack, where she curled into a ball with electricity surging through the entire body. Steven grabbed the screwattack, forcing her to fly into the air. She tucked into a 1 meter ball, dropping a load of power bombs. Steven evaded the power bombs, seeing a barrage of beams and missiles coming his way. He kept warping around to fly past the coming attacks. One of the beams succeeded in hitting him, freezing him in place.
Samus: Not bad, kid. You got skills, but you're done here.
She charged a massive power beam, aiming it at Steven's head. Steven burst from the ice, delivering a roundhouse kick, knocking Samus far back, then he warped behind to send her into the air with an uppercut, taking to the skies to send her into the floor with a double fist strike. She struggled to stand up.
Steven: If that was all you have, I'll leave you to Mimic. You're done here.
Steven exited the room, moving to the watch booth.
Boomstick: Holy shit. That was awesome.
Steven: Being strong is sort of a job requirement for the God of Destruction. She's all yours, Mimic.
Mimic grinned, entering the room that Samus was in. Wiz and Boomstick reset it to volcanic pit.
Samus: You remind me of Ridley. That'll make this more satisfying.
Mimic: I fail to see how your death is satisfying to you, but to each their own opinions.
Mimic lunged at Samus, tackling her and ripping through her armor with razor sharp claws. Samus fired a beam from her arm cannon, knocking Mimic off. The dragon-like creature vanished a split second before the beam touched her, reappearing a few feet away. She disappeared again, then reappeared back on top of Samus, snapping her jaws shut on her arm. Samus' gun began to spark and break down, preventing it from working. Mimic bit down hard on the gun, crushing it. She then ripped Samus' entire arm off, tossing it aside.
Samus: Ah! Damn it!
Mimic grinned, then impaled Samus through the chest with her tail-spike.
Steven: That wasn't even close to a challenge. Bring in the next combatant.
Wiz: We're on it.
Boomstick: Next fighter is a magic martial artist named Akuma. He uses a dark force called the Satsui no Hado to brutalize and kill his enemies.
Wizard: Be watchful for his Shun Goku Satsu.
Boomstick: His trademark attack that can kill anyone by destroying their soul. It's also known as the Raging Demon.
Mimic: Is that even possible?
Wiz: Well, yes. But it's a difficult attack to master, and without proper training could possibly kill the user.
Steven: Ok. Bring him in.
The ship was set to warp to an alternate earth. When they arrived, Akuma was battling different fighters in a martial arts tournament. He was warped into the combat room.
Akuma: This place again? Why here? I've defeated the sorcerer already.
The four walked into the room.
Steven: You've been brought here to battle me. I've been searching for a worthy challenge, same as you.
Akuma: Don't make me laugh, child. You have as small a chance at beating me as the redneck has at actually being funny.
Boomstick: Not funny?!
Boomstick cocked his shotgun.
Boomstick: You self-indulgent piece of…
Wiz: Boomstick! Let Steven beat him up.
Steven: Are we gonna fight?
Akuma: Deliver one attack, and I'll decide if you're worth my time.
Steven swung a straight kick into Akuma's abdomen, knocking him into the wall.
Akuma: So, you strike the first blow. I...am Akuma. And you will know the meaning of pain!
Wiz: Let's vacate the area immediately!
The three moved to the other room, where they changed the scene to a massive arena.
Akuma: You have heart and soul. Too bad I have to rip them out of you.
Akuma and Steven charged towards each other, clashing fists. Akuma roundhouse kicked Steven to the wall, charging an energy attack known as the Gou Hadoken. He fired it at the hole Steven was in, causing an explosion. Steven suddenly appeared behind Akuma, who then punched the ground with his Kongo Kokuretsu Zan, causing multiple outward ground explosions. Steven attempted to move out of the way of all of them, as Akuma flew forward, unleashing a fiery spinning uppercut known as the Gou Shoryuken. Steven took the full force of the uppercut, hitting the floor. He recovered just in time to see Akuma charge up his deadly Raging Demon attack. Akuma slid forward, grabbing Steven, holding his fingertips forward.
Akuma: Die!
The world turned to black as multiple purple explosions pelted Steven's body. When the world returned to light, Steven was on the ground and Akuma was standing over the body, with a japanese symbol seared into his back.
Akuma: Simple.
Steven suddenly awoke, sweeping Akuma off his feet, as his face fell into Steven's uppercut. Once he was in the air, Steven kicked him across the sky, teleporting behind him foranother kick. He chained this combo five different times, then when they hit the ground, Steven charged and unleashed the same Raging Demon attack, incapacitating and defeating Akuma.
Steven: Simple. Hehehehehe.
Akuma: Bested by a child. Not one of my better days.
Steven: Surprising you survived the attack. But that much evil energy must've shielded your soul, only allowing physical damage. Anyway, Mimic! He's all yours!
Mimic appeared in the combat room. She paced up to Akuma, stopping several feet away, contemplating how she could make his death as painful as possible. Mimic then lunged at him, knocking him backwards and pinning him against the wall. She twitched her tail tip, preparing for an attack. Akuma fired his Gou Hadoken at Mimic, and she vanished, appearing on the other side of the room. Akuma used his Kongo Kokuretsu Zan to hit her with a ground-based explosion. She flew upwards into the air, avoiding the attack. Mimic warped forward, slicing her razor sharp claws down Akuma's stomach, gutting him. She slammed him into the ground, ripping his intestines out and using them to strangle him.
Steven: This is disappointing. You'd better bring me more worthy challenges, or I waste you.
Soon, they were brought to different corners all over the universe, defeating death battle combatants with ease. He defeated Rogue, Zangief, Leonardo, Yoshi, Taokaka, Spawn, Dig Dug, Vegeta, Sonic, Luke Skywalker, Mai Shiranui, Master Chief, Metal Sonic, Princess Peach, Thor, Link, Spider-Man, Blanka, Superman (Using powers that restricted his access to the sun), He-Man, Shao Kahn, Strider Hiryu, Black Orchid, Fox McCloud, RoboCop, Tails, Blastoise, Fulgore, Godzilla, Batman, Gundam Epyon, Scorpion, Deadpool, Kirby, Sold Badguy, Toph Beifong, and Guts. After he defeated the combatants, Mimic would shred them to pieces, killing them. He was soon waiting near the dead bodies, filing his nails with Scorpion's sword.
Steven: Well that was easy. How unfortunate. Well, I think it's time I head back to Earth to destroy it.
Mimic: It's ridiculous how hard it is these days to find a decent opponent.
Over Earth, Steven and Mimic appeared where they had left off.
Steven: Hello, Earthlings. I have returned! Why have you been standing there for so long?
Oolong: You were only gone like 2 minutes.
Steven: Really? Was I? Must've been time warps. Anyway…
Steven charged a powerful energy orb in his hand, preparing it to fire.
Voice: Wait!
Steven: Oh, what now?!
Goku appeared, flying through the air. Everyone was excited to see him again.
Steven: Look who's back. Have you solved the prophecy of the super saiyan god?
Goku: Still working out the kinks. But I do know I can't let you blow up the Earth.
Steven: Destruction is in my name!
Goku: I know, but could you give us a pass, just this once? Please?
Steven: And if I do, will you still fight me?
Goku: Yeah. I'd love to settle the score. But if I do, I'll probably get killed. No matter what power level I'm at, it won't be a fair fight. Wait. I got it! Hey, Steven. Can you give us five minutes to summon the super saiyan god?
Steven: Alright. You got five minutes.
Goku: Alright! Thanks!
Goku had gathered together a set of seven mystical orbs known as Dragon Balls. When placed together, they could be used to summon a wish granting dragon known as Shenron. Bulma had been using them as a 1st place bingo prize.
Goku: Eternal Shenron! I summon you forth!
The Dragon Balls glowed, and a beam of light exploding from them, transforming into Shenron, who was a green chinese dragon.
Shenron: I am Shenron. I shall grant you any wish. Now speak.
Goku: I gotta make this fast, Shenron. Have you ever heard of a super saiyan god?
Steven: I'd like to hear his answer to that question just as much as Goku.
Shenron: Yes I have.
Goku: Seriously? You really know about him?
Shenron: Yes, I'm serious. Is your wish to know whether or not I know of the super saiyan god?
Goku: No no. I want to bring him here.
Shenron: I cannot. For one does not yet exist. A super saiyan god can only exist temporarily in your world, when multiple saiyans project their energy onto another.
Goku: Can you go over that again?
Shenron: So many questions, yet no wishes. Speak your wish now!
Goku: It's more for Lord Steven. He said he'll blow up the Earth unless he meets a super saiyan god.
Shenron: Wha? He's here?! The Lord Steven?! Oh, pleased to meet you! I've...heard things.
Steven: Likewise, but I'm in a rush, so tell them how to summon the super saiyan god.
Shenron: Oh, right!
Bulma: Anyone ever seen Shenron frazzled?
Shenron: Long ago, a small group of pure-hearted saiyans questioned the evil comited by their race. The good saiyans decided to lead a revolt against the bad, and to ensure victory, pooled their powers to create a savior: A super saiyan god. The savior easily defeated the evil saiyans with his immense power, but he then vanished as quickly as he came, as the energy the saiyans had offered him could not last for long. In time, evil again took root on the saiyan planet, and the memory of the super saiyan god became myth, merely lost altogether. But I still know how to summon him. Five saiyans with righteous hearts must join hands and instill their inner light into another. With his friends' energy flowing through him, this saiyan shall then take the form of a super saiyan god. I have given you the knowledge you desired. Your wish is granted. Please excuse me, Steven.
Shenron disappeared, and the dragon balls flew into the air, shot across the world.
Steven: This is unfortunate. All of you are pure-hearted but their are only five of you. You need a total of six.
Bulma: Where are we going to find a sixth saiyan?
Steven: Oh, well. Thought I'd get to meet the saiyan god, but I guess not.
Videl: Steven! Wait. There is another saiyan.
Steven: Where?
Dende: Everyone. Videl is pregnant. With in her is Gohan and her quarter saiyan baby.
Gohan: Are we really having a baby?!
Everyone was excited cheering over the exciting news.
Steven: WILL YOU PEOPLE SHUT UP AND CALL FORTH THE SUPER SAIYAN GOD?!
Gohan: Huh? Alright. Let's add Videl in the mix and try it.
Goku, Vegeta, Gohan, Trunks, Goten, and Videl joined hands. They planned to make Goku the super saiyan god.
Vegeta: Why does Kakarot get to be the god?
Bulma: Quit complaining!
All five of them were engulfed in a blue energy aura that spread and wrapped around Goku. When the aura subsided, Goku was transformed into a super saiyan god. His eyes and hair were turned red, and he was noticeably thinner.
Mimic: This will be amusing.
Steven: Indeed. It's my reward for being so patient.
Goku: Wait. You really think I've become a god?
Steven: We'll know when we start our battle. If you can prove you're now stronger than me, I'll leave Earth alone.
Goku: At least that gives us a shot.
Steven: Everyone vacate the area. Things are going to be dangerous soon.
Everyone left the area, staying a safe distance away. The two combatants stared each other on. Goku charged up and flew forward, preparing a massive blow, colliding into Steven's blocking arm. The force of this attack created a massive crater.
Steven: So tell me. How does it feel, becoming a god?
Goku: It's incredible.
Steven: I see. It surprises you. It's difficult to fathom what you can do now.
The two flew up into the air. Steven threw a kick, Goku blocked it then punched Steven in the chest. The two clashed in the air, with Steven gaining the upper hand. They flew through the city, continuously clashing, flying through the streets. They came to rest above the city again.
Steven: Yes. Good. Now you're getting it.
Goku showed a look of disappointment.
Steven: What's wrong? You seem disappointed.
Goku: Honestly, yes.
Steven: Why? Don't you like being a deity?
Goku: It's not the power. It's what it took to get it. What it means.
Steven: I'm not following.
Goku: It's a level of strength I'll never reach on my own.
Steven: And that limit disturbs you.
Goku: Yeah. Hyah!
The two started clashing again, creating sonic booms in the air.
Steven: You say such interesting things. Aren't you happy to have friends who are willing to help you become a god?!
They crashed, sending each other different directions.
Goku: Yeah, of course I am. But it's not my strength. I spent my life pushing myself to be the strongest. And now there's a power level I'll never be able to reach on my own. And I hate that.
Steven: If that's so, then why did you agree to do it?
Goku: Because at least this way, I have a chance to beat you.
Steven: Well, you seem to be addicted to battle.
Goku: I get that a lot.
Steven knocked Goku over the city, kicking him into a nearby forest.
The party guests, Z-fighters, and Mimic flew after the group. Those who couldn't fly rode in one of Bulma's hover ships.
Inside the forest, they clashed harder and harder, causing shockwaves that leveled most of the forest, ending up knocked into a desert. Vegeta watched in jealousy.
Vegeta: Kakarot is such a bastard! He always has all the fun, and yet...for once I'm glad it's not me.
The two clashed multiple times, destroying the many rock formations around them.
Steven: You hate your strength because it's not yours?
Goku: That's right!
Steven: That's a sign of pride. It'll be your downfall.
He kicked him through the rock formations, ending up parting the nearby river, fighting inside it.
Steven: Foolish, useless pride. It's rare to see a saiyan consumed by that flaw.
They ended up under the ground, in an underground cave with a lake.
Goku: Your wrong about saiyans. Vegeta's always been obsessed with his pride. It's way more important to him then it is to me.
Steven: And yet, he made a fool of himself on stage to protect his friends.
Goku: That's right. I respect him a lot for that. It was difficult to swallow, but he did it anyway, because he knew the stakes.
Steven: Oh. Similar to how you swallowed your pride to accept this borrowed power, I suppose. You should know, I'm not satisfied either, at least not yet.
Goku: Yeah, why not?
Steven: I still haven't even come close to using my full power in this fight.
Goku: Oh, that makes sense. I've been going at about 80 percent myself.
Steven: What? You're holding back? Grr! Alright fine! Let's see how you do at this speed!
Steven sped across the water, and started clashing faster and harder with Goku.
Steven: How's that? Taking me seriously now?
Goku: You're about to find out!
Goku's transformation suddenly ran out, but still continued keeping up with Steven. At one point Steven started firing blasts at Goku.
Goku: You didn't tell me we were using blasts now!
Steven: This isn't a game! You're fighting to live!
Goku flew behind, smashign through Steven's stomach. In rage, he fired blasts in all directions, crashing many rocks on Goku.
Goku: GYAH! I WILL NOT LET YOU DESTROY MY WORLD!
He transformed into regular super saiyan, flying out of the cave behind Steven, and they began rapidly clashing above Earth, eventually taking them in orbit.
Goku: If you're gonna use blasts against me, then fine! I've got one, for you!
Steven: Go on. Feel free.
Goku teleported behind Steven, charging his kamehameha.
Goku: Kame-Hame-HAAAA!
A massive blue beam hit Steven, creating an explosion that rocked Earth below. Steven was unharmed, teleporting behind Goku, then dropping a massive orange energy ball attack.
Steven: My turn!
Goku: I can't let that blast hit the Earth!
Goku held back the energy ball attack, trying to stop it from closing the distance with the ground.
Steven: Evidently, you haven't realized it yet.
Goku: Realized what?
Steven: Your God form. It ran out some time ago.
Goku: What? Than how did I…
Steven: It seems that when you fought me in God form, your body learned from the experience. Merely feeling that power was enough to push you to new heights.
Goku: I wish I could feel happy about that.
Steven: You should. The God power is yours, just like you wanted.
Goku: Yeah. But there's one problem. This energy ball. It's going to do major damage, and I can't stop it! You're too strong!
Steven: Then just give up and accept your planet's fate!
Steven fired an energy beam from his finger into the destruction sphere, causing it to be pushed closer to the Earth.
Goku: Damn it. Come on!
Goku struggled to hold back the sphere. Soon his strength failed him and he was swallowed in the sphere. It closed the distance with the Earth at astonishing speeds. Suddenly, Goku's God form reappeared. He absorbed the entire energy ball around him, destroying it before it could hit the Earth. When the dust settled, Steven flew towards him.
Steven: How did you do that?
Goku: I have no idea.
Steven: You're a fascinating individual.
Steven held his hand towards Goku, charging up a ki blast, but then shut it down.
Goku: What are you doing?
Steven: I just want to hear you say you give up.
Goku: Well, I do. I've given it all I've got, but I'm still no match for you.
Steven: Well, I'm glad you're finally realizing the terror of Steven the Destroyer. Don't be disappointed though. I've been alive far longer than you comprehend, and your strength is the second most formidable that I've ever seen.
Goku: Second? Well that's a drag.
Steven: But there is something you should know that you'll find quite surprising.
Goku: What? Have you decided not to destroy Earth?
Steven: What? No not that. I said I'd do it, and the Destroyer God must keep his credibility.
Goku: Oh, that's a shame. Then what is it?
Steven: You remember my attendants, Whis and Mimic?
Goku: Yeah?
Steven: Whis, while he waits on me hand and foot, is also my teacher. And Mimic is just around that same level.
Goku: You're serious? So you're not the strongest in the universe?
Steven: Depends on which universe you're thinking of. This is the seventh universe, but there are others, twelve in total with beings much mightier than us.
Goku laughed a bit before falling unconscious. Steven grabbed him, flying down to Earth where the rest of the group was waiting.
Mimic: Are you finished yet? Or must I wait longer?
Steven: Don't worry, I'm destroying Earth now.
Steven charged up an energy blast in his hand, powering it up…..then blasted a rock.
Mimic: What the hell?!
Steven: What do you want from me? I destroyed Earth, just not very much of it. Must've used up all my power in the fight. I'll finish when I get back after a good night's rest. Three years should do the trick.
Goku: Thanks, Lord Steven.
Steven: Thank you. You're the first opponent I've faced that's forced me to use 70 percent of my power.
Steven walked towards Bulma.
Steven: Excuse me, Bulma?
Bulma: What is it this time?
Steven: I'd like to apologize for making a mess of your party.
Bulma: Never mind that. Why don't you apologize for hitting me!
Steven: Yes. I'm sorry about that.
Oolong: You know he can still kill us right?
Steven: We'd be honored to be invited to your next party. And I insist on trying some of that delicious pudding.
Bulma: I'll fill my whole swimming pool with it, but if you don't like it, I don't want to hear you complain.
Steven: If I try it and I'm displeased I won't say anything, I'll just destroy Earth.
Goku: When you come back, we'll fight again right?
Steven: Of course. Come on, Mimic. Whis and Beerus are expecting us at home.
Mimic: Self-centered, narcissistic, wretch!
The two of them warped off the planet.
At the God of Destruction home, Steven and Whis were enjoying a plate of sushi.
Steven: I must say, Earth has many delicacies that I'd love to try.
Whis: Indeed. How about I go get us some sauces?
Whis floated to the home to get sauce.
Steven: So many things to try, and I haven't even scratched the surface. I've got to get back there soon.
Mimic: Wait… You left Earth alive just so you could try more food?!
Mimic snarled, her purple eyes glowing in rage.
Steven: Now, Mimic. Stay back.
Steven dashed away at rapid speeds with Mimic in close pursuit.
Mimic: Get back here, child!
Whis suddenly flew in from the sky, into Mimic's path.
Whis: Mimic, that's enough!
Whis karate chopped Mimic in the neck, knocking her out.
Steven: Thanks for the save.
Whis: I had to do it. She was out of control.
Steven: Alright, well I'm ready for bed. Set the alarm bombs to go off in three years.
Whis: Wait, you can't go to bed yet. You haven't brushed your teeth!
Steven: You can really be a bother, you know that?
On Earth, everyone was redoing Bulma's birthday party.
Bulma: Let's do this one right! 1, 2, 3!
Everyone: Happy Birthday Bulma!
Oolong: 38 is crazy old!
Bulma: Shut up!
Goku and Vegeta were talking.
Vegeta: The next time we need that power I get to be the god!
Goku: That's fair. But, I'll tell you something. That god power up gives you one heck of a hangover. Speaking of power ups, when Bulma got hit, you went crazy. "My Bulma!" That was pretty funny.
Bulma: My hero!
Vegeta: That's-I don't remember saying that! It's hardly what matters. In that brief moment, I surpassed you, Kakarot!
Goku: I guess when we're fighting someone that strong, all we need is to get them to slap Bulma and we're all good!
Bulma: That's really funny!
Bulma slapped Goku.
Piccolo: How did you know about Vegeta's power up?
Goku: Uh.
Piccolo: You'd already arrived by instant transmission. You were watching the whole fight!
Oolong jumped on Goku's back, pulling his hair.
Oolong: You were watching us be his punching bags? What. Did you bring popcorn, too?
Goku: I was just seeing his moves and come up with a way to beat him. I didn't come up with anything, but is that what matters?
Vegeta: Bulma, I think Kakarot needs some more of your signature slapping!
Bulma: That's right!
Goku: Hey, wait. I'm sorry!
Bulma slapped Goku multiple times.
On the Supreme Kai's world, Supreme Kai and Kabitokai were amazed at Steven's denial to destroy Earth.
Supreme Kai: Steven found a world he wouldn't destroy. Amazing.
Kabitokai: Goku does have that affect on people. Now, even Steven respects him.
THE END