A/N: Okay, this is EXTREMELY retarded. I wrote this one day and I just found it again a few weeks later. If you haven't yet, please check out "Rosalie's Chat" and "Isabella's Chat". Thank you and and enjoy. Please review!
Love you all!
Ericaisdazzled
Edward's Rules For Sex
1. I would like to be away for the "occasion".
2. If I am at home when you get "freaky", don't think!
3. Rosalie, you may not think about how pretty you are when you having sex.
4. Jasper, you cannot make Alice "get in the mood" when I or anybody else is in the room. I can only take 1 couple at a time. Don't think about it either.
5. No one can think about their past sexual experiences. (Alice, don't think about your future ones.) Please spare me!
6. Over all- DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!
7. Bella, wait until we get married, then we can get it on! Wooo!
P.S. I am still a full virgin and I would like to keep it that way for at least a few more weeks! Oh, and NO CELL PHONES! (Read Rosalie's Chat for more information.)