Major Edward Cullen is in the Air Force, along with his best friend, Major Jasper Hale. While stationed at the NORAD base in Colorado Springs, Edward makes it his mission to woo the beautiful, snarky Bella Swan. Edward, being the conceited guy that he is, is positive that it won't take long to get her into his barracks. Bella on the other hand is doing everything she possibly can to stay away from the sexist manwhore.

Jasper, finds the love of his life at a burlesque bar down the street from the base. Pin-Ups is the name, dancing is the game.

Emmett Cullen, is a Special Ops officer, just looking to help the world, one day at a time. It helps that he thinks he's better than Edward in every way.

This story is not meant to offend anyone, in anyway. Edward is just a jerk.

This fan fic is rated for adult humor, and smut

A/N

This Fan Fiction is co-written by, Minxyjulie, and harmonyrenesmee. The idea coming completely from Julie.

The Beta for this story is Minxyjulie, thanks for all the pick me ups – my sexy little love kitten!

Chapter 1

"Crowley! Quit fucking around. Stay in formation, prepare for landing."

"Sir, yes Sir!" Sarcastic little fuck! I'm gonna beat that kid one of these days.

It wasn't my choice; Tyler was thrown into my formation at the last minute. Not many of his senior officers could handle him, but he was a hell-of-a pilot.

"Crowley! Keep your side tight! The Major General is watching each formation today. We don't want to look messy." Jasper took a chance at trying to control, Tyler this time.

"Fuck off, Hale! I don't have to listen to you. You're not my commanding officer." I fucking hate this prick.

"Crowley, Hale is my second in command, which means, when you are flying in my formation, you listen to him as well. Need I remind you that he is your ranking officer? Have some respect, Airman."

He grumbled something about me calling him an Airman, instead of a Captain. Ask me if I give a flying fuck. My formation is one of the best Alpha flight crews around here. No one is taking that away from me, not Crowley, and definitely not this Major Isabella Swan, I keep hearing so much about. I haven't worked my ass off for eight years, just to have it handed to me by some female that made her way up the Chain of Command, by giving free blow jobs.

"Base to Foxtrot 15 Echo Formation Alpha. This is Major General Aro Volturi. Do you copy? Over."

"Copy that. This is F15 E Formation Alpha, Sir. Over."

"Who am I speaking with, Airman? Over."

"Sir, Major Edward Cullen, Sir. Over."

"Major Cullen, your formation is cleared for landing. There is another formation directly behind you. Please be prompt. Do you copy? Over."

"Sir, yes Sir. Over and out."

"Alright boys, you heard em', clean landing on the strip. That means you, Tyler."

XX

Surprisingly enough, Tyler didn't fuck it up for me… this time anyway. Striping out of my flight uniform from my torso and let it hang, I was walking along side Jasper.

Jazz is normally just as loud and mouthy, as I am, with good reason. We grew up together, brothers of sorts. Emmett, - my older, much louder brother, – Jacob, - my cousin Renesmee's fiancé, - and Jasper, - my best friend. The four of us were inseparable, ever since I could remember, all we wanted to do was follow in my father's footsteps, and help our country, in one way or another. Jasper and I had an obsession with planes, so what better place to be then the Air Force? Jacob was fascinated with anything that had to do with bombs, - I assure you, he's not a terrorist, he just looks like it. So naturally, he wanted to get into the Air Force, as a Bombardier. Didn't quite happen that way though, he was a fighter pilot like the rest of us. He was forced by his superiors to believe, that he had the intelligence to be a high ranking pilot, - I know, it wasn't nice of his superiors to lie to him like that, but who am I to judge? Emmett got his jollies off, dreaming about boats, - yeah, I would think he was gay too… if he wasn't married. Don't get me wrong, I still have my doubts.

Emmett was in the Navy, at one point; - see… told you I had my doubts. He was one of the Commanders of the USS Nimitz (CVN-68). Since it was the largest Aircraft Carrier, - in the States anyway, - I was able to see him fairly often.

Emmett and I have always been competitors, always trying to one up each other. Before his promotion late last year, he and I were pretty much at the same rank.

He was a kind, gentle giant, but when you got him mad, he practically turned into the Incredible fucking Hulk. Because of his friendly, but violent nature, he was asked to be a part of the Special Operations Force. Technically, I wasn't allowed to know that he was moved to Special Ops, but I'm his brother, and he likes to brag. Yeah, he's a dick.

It all started when… okay, hold on. Let me get back to my barracks first, then I'll tell you the story.

"Cullen, I'm heading over to Pin-Ups with some of the guys. You comin'?"

"Yeah, I'll meet you there later. I need to call Nessie, and get settled first."

"Alright, don't show up too late, or I'll have all the girls to myself again." Cocky motherfucker.

"It happened one fucking time, bitch. Get over it. I told you, I wasn't interested in any of those women anyway." I slapped, Hale, in the back of his head, and made my way back to my quarters.

The "one time" in which we were just speaking of, was when we first joined the Air Force. The two of us were Airman, and just turned of age to drink. I got to the bar around one in the morning, and all the half decent looking whores there were all over Jasper. He was a good looking enough guy, he could get just as many girls as I could, I just had bigger balls then he did. Fuck em', and leave. What's the point in staying when you can have a new, possibly better lay the next night? Being married, and in any type of military force is just plain stupid if you ask me. You're just going to be depressed the entire mission, wishing you could hold your loved one in your arms? Yeah, not for me.

Sorry, I got off topic. Anyway… Jasper was going completely overboard – like abandon ship overboard, - with his Southern drawl. It was pretty sickening. The girls that night were all over his junk, but like I said, I wasn't interested in any of them, so I really didn't give a fuck.

I heard someone behind me yell "Oh Fuck!" Naturally, I turned around; drama was always a good way to start off Training Missions.

Just as my body whipped around, I saw an F22 A Raptor collide into another of its class. A single side of the tail from the first aircraft, hanging by a thread, it crashed onto the concrete. Luckily, it was only a few feet from the ground, so it wouldn't cause any serious damage.

And… that's what happens when you have a messy formation.

The craft opened, revealing an unmoving person. Right, guess I was wrong, there is serious damage. Being at any type of military base, death, - though unfortunate, - can become a fairly huge part of your life. After a while, you get use to seeing it. Accidents happen often, although death doesn't always follow the incident, it's still a grieving process. Which is probably why we have some of the best therapists.

I personally believe they are also available to help all the girls I've fucked around here, get over me. I'm not being conceited; I just know how to work my shit.

Sorry… off topic again.

I could see the minimal movement coming from the craft; I guess he was going to be okay. Major General was going to have his ass though.

He stepped over the seat, climbed down the ladder of his air vessel, and waved his arms like an idiot. He took off his toque, and pulled his hair out of the up-do.

Um, you're watching this dude… why?

Ah, um. Fuck if I know.

It's okay, no one is noticing you. Just turn around and walk away. Play it off.

Right, one step at a time.

Exactly, no one has to know that you were just staring at another guy.

Fuck off, I wasn't staring, I was making sure he was okay. He just crashed, fucker.

Uh huh.

The extremely long, wavy, brunette hair fell down, over very soft feminine curves.

Fuck, she's hot. Don't worry, I knew you weren't gay.

Just, shut the fuck up would you?

Says the mental guy talking to himself...

Douche.

I was too far away from her, to notice if she was fuckable or not, but that cute little ass was prime.

"Newton! You son of a bitch!" Well, she definitely has a high pitch scream. I'll have to teach her my name later.

She switched directions, watching all of the on lookers. Our eyes locked for a moment, before her face contorted, smirked and threw up her tiny middle finger at... me? Shock crossed my mind for a minute, before I chuckled.

Fuck, she's a feisty bitch.

That's fine, I like a challenge, especially when it looks like that.

This is what happens when you let a female, pilot a beauty like an F22. Sure, some are cute in their uniforms, but base work should be their limit. I'm not sexist at all, but there really are some things that certain women just can't do.

Wait… that sounded wrong. Let me try that again. There are women here with a higher ranking then me, and they deserve to be here. There are some that actually know what they're doing. Apparently, 'Isabella Swan' was one of them. This brunette here though, she isn't one of the Airmen that belong here.

Speaking of which, Isabella is due to arrive sometime today. She is doing the same Training Missions that Jasper, Jacob, and I are doing. I'd have to put some time aside to introduce myself; I have to meet the female that rivals even me. Jacob wouldn't be in until later tonight, his formation would be the last to arrive. He was the second in command for the F 15 C Fighting Falcon Alpha Formation; Sam Uley was his aircraft's leader.

I heard my barracks chanting my name; it's ridiculous how tired I am. I'll give Nessie a call, then head on over to Pin-Ups for a few beers.

Back to my original story. It all started when I was 7. I was adopted into the Cullen family after my mom died in a car accident. We were driving home from one of my little league games. I survived, she didn't, end of story. My father walked out when I was about 2 weeks old, or some shit like that, so my mom told me anyway. Dr. Carlisle Cullen and his family were friends of my mother's, long before I was born. Carlisle promised her that he and his wife would do anything and everything they could to take care of her. Elizabeth, my mother, roomed with Carlisle's wife, Esme in University. The three of them finished school together, basically becoming lifelong friends, only Elizabeth wasn't around to live her life.

Carlisle and Esme fought tooth and nail to bring me into their family. It was a hard case, I was almost sent to Child Services, but Carlisle refused to let it happen.

Emmett, my adoptive older brother, had such a fucked up family, yet he'd still turned out to be a big teddy bear. His family lived next door to the Cullen's for a few years; they never cared much for friends. Emmett's father shot his mother one night, then committed suicide. He was only four years old when it happened, so he doesn't really remember much of it. Carlisle heard the shots, ran over, and got Emmett the hell out of there. That's really all I know, the Doc doesn't like to talk about it much. Em's two years older than me, he always filled the big brother role well; we didn't have to be blood related to be close.

When I was accepted into the family, we lived in Forks, Washington. Carlisle was one of the best doctors at Forks Community Hospital. There were hardly any physicians to choose from, but he deserved his title nonetheless. Soon, he started doing a lot of his doctoral services overseas, he was never in a place for more than a few weeks, so Em and I were never forced to travel all over the world. We weren't army brats. During our summer vacations, we were invited to some of the bases he tended to.

Jasper moved to Forks, from Monterrey, Texas, when he was 10, beginning his education at the start of the school year. We met, and hit it off right away; neither of us took shit from anyone. Jazz and I definitely had our fair share of fights with the fuckers who dared to take us on. What? It's true...

My cousin Renesmee lived in Port Angeles, her mother Irina was Esme's older sister. Nessie and I were brought up as siblings, a little sister to Em and I. She had a part-time job at a department store, and that was where she met Jacob. They became extremely good friends, and soon, Jake was a part of our group as well.

With Nessie living a half hour away, and Jake going to school on the Quileute Reservation, the 5 of us really only hung out on weekends. Regardless, it was hard finding closer friends to have.

Emmett went off to an Ivy League school, a year before I did, he had taken a year off, so he could work, and find his true calling. When Emmett left for school, my father finally got a job that would ensure he could eventually get his dream career. Carlisle just had to work his way up the ranks.

Carlisle, Esme and I were moved closer to the Colorado Springs Air Force base, my father would be working in the underground Sciences Department.

I couldn't have been more proud, that Carlisle was finally getting what he had been working so hard for. It couldn't have happened to a better person, honestly.

The problem with this plan was, I was leaving the rest of my family behind. I was prepared to say goodbye to Emmett for a little while, because I was guaranteed to see him again. What I wasn't prepared for, was leaving Jazz, Nessie, and Jake. I knew I would see Ness again, she was family after all, but what was I going to do without my other friends. I couldn't actually imagine life without them.

Jacob, and I had lost touch completely, though I found out later that he started dating Renesmee. I wasn't happy in the least; it felt sort of like, as a brother, he betrayed me. For Nessie though, I could put up with it, I knew he would go to the end of the earth for her.

Jasper and I spoke as often as possible, promising to get into the same schools, and meeting there in the fall. We both got accepted into Brown University, getting our Undergraduates Degree in Computer Science. When school was completed, he and I joined the Air Force, wanting to become one of their officers. Jazz was able to excel, and get his PhD in Physics, while I advanced my intelligence by getting my PhD in Biology.

Six years later, Jasper and I ran into Jacob, catching up on the events I hadn't already heard about from Renesmee.

I had promised Nessie that I would contact her in one way or another, every time I arrived at a new base. I wasn't able to speak with her often, but I always kept my word.

The three of us worked our way through the system, furthering ourselves up the line, becoming Major's. Right at my seven year mark, I was advanced to Major immediately. Around the same time I had found out that Jake proposed to my baby cousin. Was I happy about it? No. Did I deal with it? No… Should I have punched in the face, and broke his nose? Probably not. Oops, accidents do happen. I swear, you can ask anyone.

Jasper and Jake had to wait another year, before they moved on up the social ladder.

Has anyone else noticed that this guy hasn't sworn in the past 10 minutes? I think he just broke a record. GUINNESS!

Last time I checked, we were the same guy…

Don't put me in the same category as you, if anything, I'm your better half.

Uh huh, precisely why no one can see you.

Touché… point to the non-invisible guy.

I looked around, trying to figure out who I was suppose to point at. Everybody seemed visible to me.

You are such an idiot Cullen; I was giving you winning points for your earlier statement. I'm taking them back; you lost them in the air of your stupidity.

Oh, sorry. Wait… Fuck you!

Oops, guess Guinness is out now. Good job, fuckwit.

Inner monologues usually help to pep you up, and make you feel better. Mine is basically the mirror image of me. So naturally, he's a complete, and total fucking prick.

I took a minute to relax in my bunk. I've been waiting to do that since the minute I woke up this morning. 4:30 am wake up calls; really don't agree with me.

It was still early, too early actually. Why the hell would Jazz want to go to a bar, it's only 19:00 hours. We normally wait at least until 22:00 hours. Wonder what he's up too…

"Major Edward Cullen?" Fuck, I was just getting comfortable.

I rolled out of my bunk to see what the intrusion was about.

Seth? "Captain Clearwater? How are you doing? I thought your formation wasn't getting in until 21:00 hours?" He belonged to Major Uley's formation. I guess Jacob was in earlier than scheduled.

"Major Cullen, I'm doing very well, Sir. We arrived just after the F22 Alpha formation. Did you see the crash? That idiot Mike Newton caused it… again."

"Yeah, I saw it. Front row seats and all. The girl seemed to be pretty hot, from a distance anyway."

"Oh yeah, Sir. That Major is definitely a looker. Anyway, Sir, I have to get going to my barracks. There is a phone call at the station for you."

"Thanks, Cap. Will I see you at Pin-Ups, later?"

"Probably, Sir. Bye."

I've always liked that kid; he had the utmost respect for any type of authority figure.

I wonder who the phone call was from. Probably Esme, checking in.

"Hello, Major Cullen speaking."

"Edward! How long have you been there? Why the hell haven't you called me yet? Did you forget your promise already? How could you forget? I hate it when you are out flying; anything could go wrong up in the sky. And you drive a one man plane! Jake hasn't called yet either, is he there yet? Of course not, he's not in until later, sorry. How are you? Are you there? Why are you so silent?"

I chuckled, hoping to keep the extreme laughter concealed. "Renesmee, breathe would you? I just arrived, I had to settle in my bunk, then I was coming to call you, I swear. What's with the lecture anyway?"

"You're right, sorry. I just freak out; the sky can be so unsafe…"

"Which is what we are trained for, Ness. Remember?"

"Who said you could interrupt me? I'm pretty sure I wasn't finished talking. Is Jake there yet?"

Silence.

"Edward? You still there?"

Silence.

"Edward!"

"I'm here Ness, I'm just waiting for you to tell me if it's okay to speak…"

"You are such a dick sometimes, Edward. Is Jacob there yet or not?"

"I'm not sure, sis. I just spoke to Seth Clearwater, he's in the same formation, so I'm sure Jake is here somewhere."

"And he hasn't called me yet? What the hell! Go find him, and make him pick up the damned phone. What is with you boys and forgetting the promises you made to me. How's Jazz? I haven't spoken to him in a few weeks."

"Are you finished? Is it my cue to speak?"

"Bite me, Cullen."

"I have no idea where your fiancé is, but if I see him, I'll let him know how demanding you are." I could tell she was getting ready to say something, I kept speaking over her. "Jasper is fine, he's at a bar right now, or on his way there anyway. I'll meet up with him in a bit. Should I tell him how demanding you are as well? Actually, never mind, he already knows." Snicker...

"Oh God, Cullen. Would you fuck off, for just like, a minute? Just one minute. Is it impossible to be nice to me for 60 seconds?"

"Impossible? No, not at all. Unlikely however? Definitely. I can't pass up a chance to piss you off little sister; it's one of the highlights of my life."

"I thought fucking random women was your highlight?"

Snort, she had me there. "You're right, but you come at a very close second? Isn't that nice of me? I just love making you feel special."

"Ass."

I noticed an Airmen approach me. Was he trying to eavesdrop on my conversation? Really?

Get over yourself, you, nor your conversation, is that interesting.

Renesmee's right, you are an ass.

I believe Ness was speaking to you, not me.

I stared him, up and down.

"Can I help you, Airmen?"

"Airmen Alec Volturi, Sir. I'm sorry to intrude, but Major General Volturi would like a word with you. Now."

"Thank you, Airmen. I'll be along in a moment."

"Sir, yes Sir." He nodded once, and walked away. I wonder if he was the Major General's kid.

"Alright, Ness, you heard the orders, duty calls. I'd better go see what he wants. I'll call you soon, okay? Love you sis."

"Kay, Eddie."

"I hate you so much right now, call me Eddie one more time, and I'll make sure not to call you next time."

"You didn't call me this time, so I don't think it really makes a difference tardo. You shouldn't make empty threats dear brother, they come back to bite you in the ass. Call me when you have time. Love you too Eddie boy."

"Hanging up now, asshole." I could hear her loud cackle, just before I slammed the receiver down.

Ever since I could remember, Ness and Em made a habit of calling me 'Eddie'. It was strictly just to piss me off. There was no end to the madness, clearly.

Making my way to Aro's office, I wondered what he wanted. I wasn't supposed to meet with him until tomorrow morning. Probably just to brief me on the upcoming activities, I guess.

I approached the assistant behind the desk; she worked for Aro.

"Major Edward Cullen, Ma'am. I was told Major General Volturi, is expecting me."

"Of course, Major Cullen. I'll let him know you're here. I'm Gianna, please make yourself comfortable."

Fuck, now that was a nicely sculpted ass. The things I could do to her behind that desk...

Whoa. Calm down there little buddy. Do you really want to meet the Major General with a raging hard on?

Yeah, I suppose that wouldn't make the greatest first impression.

You suppose? Really? Is there something that would make an even worse impression? Besides being turned on by a creepy old guy I mean.

Again with the gay jokes? Do you have anything else?

I don't know; let's look around this big empty space. I swear there use to be something here.

Don't go there.

Something squishy, smaller than average.

Fuck off, bitch.

I'm pretty sure it was once called a brain. I'll have to look that up.

You're a bastard. What did I ever do to you?

I would tell you, but we don't actually have enough time for me to list all of your flaws. I'll write them down for you though; we'll get to them one day. Don't you worry.

Sitting in the reception area, I took the time to look around the office. It was a decent size, not the biggest I've seen…

Don't say it!

Don't say what?

Don't say "it isn't the biggest I've seen, but if I compared everything to my cock, we'd be here all day."

I didn't have to say it; you said it for me…

Wha… - Fuck it! I'm done.

Aro's reception space was full of old paintings. Most of which I have never seen, or heard of. They were quite interesting though. Many were full of dark and gloomy colours, but were layered with clouds.

Cough…

Shut the fuck up, I don't need to hear any of your fucked up gay jokes right now.

You know, for such a good looking man – if I do say so myself, - you talk to yourself a hell of a lot.

I'm ignoring you now.

Is it possible to ignore yourself? Fine, I'll just hum softly in the background, while you look at all of the pretty pictures.

Can I get on with what I was saying? I would like this part of my life to end soon, thank you very much.

By all means, proceed.

The office was a bit out of the ordinary. The usual magazines were spread on the end tables, but the whole room had a sort of dreary look to it. Not necessarily sad, but cold… maybe? It was hard to describe. Though, it apparently felt like home to him.

Gianna came back into the reception area. Fuck! Look at those legs, they go on for miles. It's nice to know that Aro lets his assistant dress to impress. I'll have to find a way to meet with her later.

She approached me, and I licked my lips. Her skin flushed a bit. That's right, baby. I know you want this.

Who wouldn't?

"M - Major Cullen?" She stuttered a bit. Was I making her nervous? Well, that's good to know. "Major General Volturi would like to speak with you now. He is just through that door." She pointed to the door opposite the closet, I would presume.

"Thank you, Gianna." I winked at her, watching her eyes widen to obscene lengths. She stumbled a bit, trying to get to her seat. She was out of my view as I shut the door to Aro's office.

"Major Cullen. Very nice to see you, my boy. I trust the flight in went well? Please, sit." He gestured towards one of the two chairs in front of his desk. A kind smile plastered on his face. I've heard so much about this man, but have never had the chance to meet him, until now. Wait, what the fuck?! Did he just call me boy? Nice, fucker.

"Major General Volturi. It's very nice to see you too, Sir. The flight went very well, Sir, thank you. The formation is looking great." Yeah, I'm a suck up… I know. To be the best, you have to get along with the people who are better than you. Keep your enemies closer, and all that jazz.

"Very well, Major Cullen. Though, from what I saw, your formation was a bit sloppy. Your fifth Airmen, I mean. He seemed to refuse to follow orders. How would you have dealt with this, in a normal situation?"

Crowley is a dead motherfucker. Here I am, meeting this guy for the first time. He's supposed to be impressed by my authentically amazing work, and instead he wants to talk about the not-so-disciplined child? Fuck me.

"Well, Sir, as you know, we had a last minute change in recruitment. Captain Crowley was brought upon my formation, just until we arrived at this base. His senior officers have always had a problem controlling him. The only reason he's still around, is because of his exceptional piloting skills, Sir. I apologize for not succeeding in his discipline. I had no intention on disappointing you, Sir." Aro had a smile playing around his lips; he must have thought my speech was comical. Nice to know my anxiety can be a comic relief. I could tell it would take all of my strength to get along with this dickweed, great.

"Yes, I am well aware of the recent changes, but you needn't worry. I suppose it was more of a test then anything. I've seen and heard many great things about you. There is no need to be anxious about Captain Crowley; he will be dealt with momentarily. I brought you here for a completely different reason, Major." He sat there, staring at me through beady eyes. Was he going to continue or what? His stare seemed to become scrutinizing. I felt like shrinking down in my chair – becoming a small child being lectured by an adult. His stare was intense; he wasn't letting up in the least.

"Sir, you were saying?" That caught his attention. The intensity let up a bit.

"Of course, I apologize. I sent for you today, because I wanted to speak to you about some of the events happening in the morning."

"Yes, Sir. I will be receiving a schedule at breakfast tomorrow." I wasn't sure where Aro was going with this, I already knew all of the specifics, maybe he was speaking with all of the formation leaders.

"You will be getting a schedule, but I wanted to inform you, Captain Crowley will be a permanent part of your formation from now on. I trust you will find a way to ensure his safety, as well as his discipline." Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! "Do you have a problem with that, Major Cullen?" Of course I have a problem with that, you fucking idiot. Crowley is a menace to the Air Force, he can get people killed!

"Not at all, Sir. I will figure out a way to handle him." Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. I'll beat him with the rule book, maybe that'll knock some sense into him.

"I trust you will. I hear your formation is in top shape. One more recruit will not change that. Am I clear?" Clear as crystal, motherfucker!

"Sir, yes Sir!" Fuck, what am I supposed to do with Crowley? Jasper and I will have to form a plan.

"Excellent. You are excused. It was a pleasure meeting you, Major Cullen. I hope we get together on better terms next time." I fucking hate this prick already.

"It was very nice meeting you too, Sir." With that, I stepped out into the open reception area. Gianna was still sitting at her desk, typing away. I could see her looking at me through her peripherals. Silly woman, didn't she know that men invented, and perfected the corner stare? I eyed her mercilessly for a moment, once she noticed; her sight darted down in embarrassment. That's right, babe. I own you, and don't you forget it.

With one last wink in her direction, I left the seemingly dreary office. Once I reached the outdoor part of the base, I took some time to look around. The very first time I had been here, I was with my father. This was where his dream job started, now though, it wasn't a dream, it was reality. He was now the Surgeon General of the Air Force. One of the highest rankings for Physicians. When he started, he was just a senior doctor, basically running around and taking orders. It took a while to get to where he really wanted to be, but when he finally made it, I was like a proud father.

The Base has changed quite a bit since then. Is it just me, or did the female uniforms get tighter… Hey – a man can dream.

I noticed the brunette from the earlier crash, maybe I could introduce myself. Offer her flying lessons perhaps? God knows her formation leader hasn't done a good enough job. Even so, I'd prefer to have her, over Crowley, any day.

I approached her. Fuck! She was beautiful! That heart shaped face, draped with those soft brown locks, - since there were no more assignments today, it didn't have to be worn in an up-do. The most amazing chocolate eyes I've ever seen, framed with thick luxurious lashes. Well hello there, nice of you to pop up.

Cullen, don't talk to your dick. It's creepy.

Speaking to you is creepy as well, but that doesn't seem to stop me.

Touché.

I was standing directly in front of her, reaching my hand out to introduce myself. "Hey, I'm Major Edward Cullen." She cocked an eyebrow; it practically disappeared into her hairline. She hadn't shaken my hand in greeting, so I let it drop.

"Can I help you?" She asked in a snarky voice. Wow, she's a beautiful bitch.

"I was just wondering if I could get your name." Her eyebrow came back down, furrowing with the other one.

"No." That's it? Just flat out 'No'? No fucking way! Is she serious right now?

"Why?" She wasn't leaving without at least giving me her name.

"Because you don't need it. You are not my superior officer, and I am not working with you in any way. I highly doubt we will ever see each other again. So, no, I will not be giving you my name." Fucking ranting little sexy bitch. I'll get it somehow. If she would just move her arm from her chest, I would be able to see her name... and maybe I wanted to see a shot of her tits. Even if it's just her surname, I'd take it. Move your arm, bitch!

"Why are you so opposed to it? I don't see it as a threat." Come on, come on! Just move your fucking arm.

Dude, I think she's purposely keeping her arm there.

So?

So… that means she's not moving it. That means you won't be able to see her name. Dumbass.

Right…

"I'm fairly sure I just explained my reasoning. Now, if you'll excuse me." What's with the attitude? She doesn't even know me, and she's being extremely rude.

"You gave me a reason, yes. Though I didn't see it as an explanation, I saw it as more of a way to ignore me."

"Wow, you're smarter than the sex hair makes you look. You're right though, I am trying to ignore you." With that, she swiftly walked away from me. I was standing there, dumbfounded, my mouth agape.

What the fuck just happened?

"Hey! Wait!" I ran up to her, grabbing onto her forearm. "Are you telling me, there is no chance at all in getting to know you?" Is she really trying to resist my smile? HA! Talk about impossible.

"I didn't actually tell you anything, I did imply it though. I don't deal with… your type." Ouch. My type? What type would that be?

"Way to be stereotypical. What type am I exactly?" My palms were getting a bit sweaty. Am I nervous? Why in the fuck, am I nervous?

"You seem like a manwhore. It's plain as day, actually. Now, seriously. I have a meeting to attend. Bye." Again, she walked away from me; I latched onto her for dear life. I had no idea why, she seemed like a lifeline. Fuck she's sexy when she's all pissed.

"You're not even willing to give me a chance? You're just going to be a sexist bitch?" Wait for it… wait for it… NOW!

"Excuse me? A sexist bitch? Who the FUCK do you think you're talking too. Just because I refuse to speak to the likes of you, doesn't make me a sexist bitch, it makes me smart." She stuck her tiny middle finger at me, for the second time today, and ran off.

Well, that was uncalled for.

I'll get her. I'm Edward Fucking Cullen. I get everything I want.

Welcome back to Colorado Springs, fucker. This is going to be fun.

A/N

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