Disclaimer: There's probably one of these out there, but I'm making one anyway. Basically this is a story about the cast stuck in a…stairwell. Simple enough.

Oh, I'm also from now on going to put a phrase from a movie or show or book in the beginning of my story, and you get a cookie if you review and tell me where it's from. :D

So here's the story!

Woman One: May I ask what we are doing?

Woman Two: We are visualizing car accidents.

Woman One: Do we have to visualize car accidents in the rain?

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Joseph Buquet wanted revenge. Or rather, his spirit did. He believed he had been illogically murdered. I mean, what did he ever do wrong? So he decided to do the one thing that would torture every single one of the people who hated him.

He would get them all locked in a stairwell.

Ole Joey didn't exactly know where the stairwell came from. He was just wandering around one day, chatting with a nice nearly-headless other ghost when he found it. It turned out to be a random door somewhere in one of the hallways that led to a stairwell with ten floors.

He also didn't ask how a two/three story building could have a stairwell with ten floors, but then again, he was a ghost floating around. Nothing was impossible.

So Joseph devised a plan to trap the evil people who tormented him: Erik, Raoul, Andre, Firmin, Christine, Meg, and Carlotta. No one really knows why Christine and Meg are on his list. Maybe it was because he was never allowed to jump them. But that's another story entirely.

So, how was he going to trick seven people into a very scary-looking door? Easy. He baits them.

The first was the easiest: Christine. All he had to do with get a rather shiny quarter and tie string around it (he could still touch physical items), then dangle it above the girl while she was in her room.

"Oooh, has my Angel decided to grace me with delectable money?" she cooed as it floated out of the room. Christine attempted to follow it (she ran into the door when the quarter floated through it) and actually managed to make it to the stairwell. Joseph was about to trick her into the stairwell when he realized that she could be used as bait for the next target.

So, tying a string around Christine's middle, he baited Erik by dangling her above his head. His reaction was almost the same thing.

"My Angel!" he cried shriekishly, reaching up to take his hand, but Joseph pulled her up another inch or two. Christine, at the moment, was simply zoned out.

In half an hours time, Joey had two of his seven victims. But how to get the other five?

Eventually he snitched Erik's mask ("NOOO, MY HORRID FACE, WHAT EVIL HAS TAKEN MY ONLY SANTCUARY FROM MY CURSED FACE!???!!), a piece of paper, and a pencil. Then he scribbled a note, stuck it on the mask, and dropped it on Madame Giry's desk. The note read:

Annoying She-Witch,

I have taken the Opera Ghost, and this mask is proof. If you want him back in one piece, then go to the ominously disturbing door in the abandoned hallway with all the cobwebs.

Of course, Madame Giry went to go save her ill-grateful friend, but then she ended up locked in the stairwell with Erik ("GIVE ME BACK MY MASK!!") and the amazingly spacey Christine.

Three out of seven. The next was Meg, which was fairly easy. Joseph simply took his old note and changed it around a bit, took Mme. Giry's cane, and stuck that in front of Meg. When Meg found the new note (which had the word "daughter" scribbled after the word witch, and "the Opera Ghost" was scratched out with "your mom" above it, mask was scratched out with "cane" above it, and "him" was scratched out with "her" above it) let out a scream of terror, then ran off and got herself locked in a stairwell with her pacing mother, a phantom currently sitting in a corner in fetal position, and the dazed Christine.

The last three were the hardest. Mr. Buquet currently had nothing on Andre, Firmin, or Carlotta.

Eventually, a thought of pure genius hit him when he was eaves-dropping on the two idiots. But in order to get what he needed, he needed to travel through magical Broadway Land.

But, sadly, while passing through the alternative dimensions of happy musicals, Joseph took a wrong turn. Next thing he knew, he was standing near a Ferris wheel, watching a girl with ridiculously curly blonde hair wearing an outfit that was not PG, as it was described, dancing with a man who would grow up and utter the brilliant phrase:

Say hello to my little friends.

But eventually Mr. B. left Sandy and Danny and found his way to the musical he was looking for. He snatched up what he needed, brushed the cocaine residue off it, and then returned to his world. Then he left it on Fandre's desk for them to read. This is what it said:

HELLO ALL GAY PEOPLE!

Do you want to find others just like you without having to go to a gay bar?

Then come out of the closet and go to the gay convention! There will be cocaine!

(Gay convention located behind the door in the creepy hallway)

And scribbled at the very bottom were the words: Property of the show RENT.

Needles to say, both Andre and Firmin got themselves locked inside the stairwell with the twitching phantom whose head keeps jerking to the side, the Mme. Giry that has paced a thin ditch into the platform, the Meg who is simply watching all of this, and the Christine…who still has not responded in any way.

But how to get Carlotta? How? HOW?

Then, the answer hit him like a giant hippopotamus running him down (WHAM!). It was the simplest, easiest method yet.

The ghost of J.B. floated into her dressing room while she was in it, picked up her poodle while she was watching, and left.

Carlotta, of course, chased after him screaming things in her language that no one understands (a mixture of Spanish and French. We'll call it Spanech), and ran down the hallway, and tossed the poodle into the dreaded door, which, I would like to add, was blue.

Well, the second she threw open the door again to retrieve her poodle, Meg reacted.

"Thank God you're here!" she cried, which distracted Carlotta long enough so that the door could close and successfully lock all of them in.

And so the torture began.

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A/N: I don't own Harry Potter, Grease, RENT, or that funny new TV show. I've never even seen RENT, and I had to pester a friend to even know it's about gay people and drugs.

So, do you like it? Hate it? Happy I finally wrote another story? Flames will be used to roast marshmallows on.