This is one of the only Cowboy Bebop fanfics that I know of. If you're wondering where it fits into the series… Well, it all makes PERFECT sense, really. After Brain Scratch, you just start here instead of going to the last three episodes! Let's say it's an… alternate path for the series to take.
A really STUPID alternate path.
But that's what fanfics are for.
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Cowboy Bebop: The Lost Episodes
That OTHER Session 24
Faye's Little Problem
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Faye Valentine sat on her bed, staring straight ahead at nothing. Nothing at all. Nothing was what happened to be in front of her at that moment in time, so that's what she was staring at. But that really doesn't matter very much in the grand scheme of things.
Lately, she had felt deprived. Her very special needs-the kind of needs that only Faye would understand- hadn't been being fulfilled.
And only Spike Spiegel could meet those… needs. Jet wouldn't understand; Ed was… well, Ed is Ed, after all. And Ein was a dog. And that just wouldn't work.
But Spike could do just what she needed.
Well, Faye decided to go look for Spike, hoping he would agree.
*****
Jet sat in the living room (or whatever they call it-the equivalent of a living room anyway) pruning his bansai trees.
Hands shaking, he slowly raised the clippers.
"Careful, careful… and-"
"HEY JET!!!"
Startled, he snapped the clippers shut. He sighed as he watched the top half of the tree fall to the table.
He slowly turned around in his favorite swivel chair that he loved so very very much.
"What?" Jet said dangerously.
"Where's Spike?"
Jet toyed with the idea of killing Faye, but decided to just tell her where Spike was. But he made a mental note to put cyanide in her tuna casserole as payment for taking the life of his little Jimmy.
"He's in his bedroom. Why do you want to know?"
Faye blushed. "Um… uh… well, you see… I have something very important I need to talk to him about, and-"
"On second thought, I don't want to know."
Good, she thought. The fewer who know, the better.
She walked down the hall to Spike's room. She knocked on the door.
"Who is it?" came Spike's voice.
"Can I come in?"
"No."
She sighed. "Please?"
Spike hesitated. "That doesn't sound like you. Why are you asking me nicely?"
Faye walked in. Spike was sitting on his bed, reading some kind of magazine that only he cares about.
He shot her a not-really-very-dangerous-looking glare. "I said stay out."
Faye decided to ignore that comment. "I was wondering something."
Spike looked very not amazed. "Really."
She looked deep into his eyes. "Lately, I've been craving something. And I think you can give me what I need."
Spike looked very worried.
She leaned closer and put her arms around his neck. "See, I can tell you have many suppressed… talents."
Spike stared at her, looking completely freaked out. "I REALLY don't like the way this conversation is going."
She smiled. "I have a favor to ask of you."
*****
Jet was pruning another tree.
"Steady now, easy does it…"
He heard a yell from Spike's bedroom.
The clippers snapped shut, and the entire tree fell over.
Jet sighed heavily. "Why me?"
*****
Ed walked into Spike's room. She saw Faye and Spike. On the bed. Faye was on top of him, holding on to his shirt collar, with her face about an inch from his, staring into his eyes.
Ed closed the door slowly, and ran down the hall.
"Not that kind of cookie, you pervert."
Spike blinked. "Oh."
"I want… chocolate chip."
Spike sighed, looking somewhat relieved.
Faye got off Spike and stood up. "Sometimes I wonder what's on your mind."
Spike walked towards the door. "I feel the same way about you."
Then he left, and walked down the hall.
"And I want M&Ms in them!" she called after him.
She sat down on the bed. "He's kinda cute when he's scared out of his mind… Wait, what the heck am I saying!?"
It was then that she noticed Ein trying to sneak out of the room.
Faye got an evil look in her eyes. She leapt towards the dog.
"NO ONE WHO HEARD ME SHALL LIVE!!!"
Ein ran down the hall yelping.
Faye landed on her face. "Wait a second… He's a dog! How's he gonna tell anyone?"
*****
Ein ran up to Ed.
"Ein! What have you been up to?"
And then the dog spoke. "Well, now that you mention it, I heard a very interesting bit of information…"
THE END
(for now)
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See, this originally started as just a short story. But then my friend said I should write more, and so I did... There are currently five chapters, and more are coming! Review, please!