Tear-Stained Whispers
By xX Ashlyn Malfoy Xx
Summary: Lilith is not an average witch. For one thing, she is the daughter of the Dark Wizard named Rabastan Lestrange. She is forced to make a choice between whether or not to side with the Death Eaters because of her childhood friendship with Draco. He's now a Death Eater given an impossible mission to accomplish without any help. Will Lilith be able to help Draco without the Dark Lord ever suspecting anything? What would happen if her parents found out about her growing fondness for the Malfoy boy? Will she finally be able to fight for what she believes in? Will the two survive the Final Battle?
Prologue
It was a dark summer's day. A huge black cloud covered the bright sun, casting long, dark shadows over an elegant old manor. Lestrange Manor. Lush, tall trees grew by the dark manor, providing an ample amount of unneeded shade. What the manor desperately needed was sunshine and more life. Beside the luxurious trees, numerous bushes, and flower patches, there were small ripples and splashes in an otherwise tranquil pond.
A girl of around sixteen sat at the pond's stony edge, her legs immersed in the clear water up to her knees. The dark-haired girl gently kicked at the water, sending small, crystal-like droplets onto the smooth rocks on the other side. Her pet Kneazle purred as it brushed against her side, its long, lion-like tail caressing the girl's pale hand.
"Get Milly to feed you," The girl rubbed her Kneazle's furry speckled neck. "I haven't seen any rodents in here for you to catch. Be sure to make sure that Milly gets the message. She's getting very old now." The grey Kneazle, Smoke, purred and pounded off into the manor in search of the house-elf.
Lilith glanced back at the pond, seeing her pale reflection stare back at her, her dark brown hair mixing in with the shadows provided by the cloud and the trees. Her amber eyes were similar to two small hints of sunlight in the mirror image.
"Lilith? Where are you? Don't tell me you are outside by the pond again!" The girl raised her amber eyes from the pond immediately and looked in the direction of her manor in panic. She quickly jumped up and dried her legs, letting her long dress cover them. Lilith slipped into her shoes.
"No, Mother!" Lilith called back, sprinting to a flower patch swiftly. "I was admiring the roses!" Lilith quickly sat down on a small patch of smooth stones beside the flower patch and pretended to be watching the various flowers. It was one of the few places with any actual colors other than grey and black. She quickly dried off a few more droplets on her legs and stopped immediately when she heard footsteps on the concrete path.
"Again?" Mrs. Lestrange asked, coming into view. Her amber eyes were filled with disapproval. "You've already seen them so many times. You really ought to do more with your life other than watch flowers grow. They are just flowers after all."
Cassandra Nott Lestrange was Lilith's mother and wife to Rabastan Lestrange who was now in Azkaban. Mrs. Lestrange was a tall witch and had an air of sternness around her. She also strived for perfection and respect. Her amber eyes were sharp and cold; she rarely ever smiled or laughed. Mrs. Lestrange's dark hair was always up in a bun or into one of the many hairstyles that she considered regal and neat.
"Why is your hair down again?" Mrs. Lestrange sighed sternly, crossing her arms. "And why are you lying on the ground like a Muggle? Do I need to remind you once more that you are a pureblooded witch from a well-respected family?" Lilith almost snorted at the end of the last question but quickly contained it. Everyone knew that the Lestranges weren't well-respected anymore. They haven't been for a long time.
"I'm sorry, Mother," Lilith stood up, her eyes conveying no emotion. "I wanted to see if there were any new roses so I came here in a haste. I really love admiring the multi-colored roses. See? There's a new bud, a pink rose." Lilith pointed to the light pink flower. It was a common rose but was more beautiful than the other multi-colored roses.
Mrs. Lestrange seemed to believe the lie, though she still raised her eyebrows in distrust.
"Fine," She said briskly. "Come, now, Lilith. We need to get ready to go to Malfoy Manor. The Dark Lord would be most displeased if we don't show up in time for the meeting." Most displeased, Lilith snorted derisively as she followed her mother back into Lestrange Manor. He won't be displeased. He'd be furious and kill us once we set foot in the manor two minutes late.
Mrs. Lestrange wasn't a Death Eater, but she supported them. Rabastan Lestrange and his brother, Rodolphus, were all back in Azkaban with Lucius Malfoy, who was technically Lilith's distant-related uncle. Lilith's aunt Bellatrix had escaped, but barely.
Lilith had only seen her father a few times. He'd been in Azkaban prison almost all of her life.
Until January 1996. Lilith had been halfway through her fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. She'd read the news about the mass breakout in the Daily Prophet. After that day, everyone gave her strange looks and avoided her at all costs.
Lilith hadn't minded in the least. She enjoyed being alone. But she didn't like people whispering about her and her family. Lilith was a Lestrange. And she was proud of it, even if Lestranges were no longer respected and looked up to. She didn't care at all what others thought. Most had thought she was Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange's daughter. It took some convincing to tell the other students and the teachers that she was, in fact, Rabastan Lestrange's daughter.
However, even being Rabastan's daughter made people cringe around her and distance themselves from her as much as possible. Lilith remembered the time she got Sorted.
"L-L...Lestrange, Lilith," McGonagall broke off a little as she read out the name. Not call. Whispers and gasps broke out from the four House tables at once. Lilith walked out of the cluster of students arrogantly, silently challenging the teachers with her sharp amber eyes. Lilith saw McGonagall's hand tremble just a little as she dropped the Hat over Lilith's head, covering her eyes.
A cunning and elusive mind... I know just where to put you, the Sorting Hat had told her. Lilith smirked slightly as the Hat pronounced her a Slytherin only seconds after the Hat was put on her head. She took a seat beside her new friend, Tracey Davis, whom she had met on the Hogwarts Express. She felt over a thousand pairs of eyes on her and yet Lilith didn't care. She was proud to be a Lestrange.
Lilith remembered the very first time she saw her father. Her father wasn't even there when she was born. He had always been too busy with his Death Eater duties. Lilith had been very disappointed when she learned that only one of her parents actually took care of her. Now, she didn't care about her relationship with her father at all. He could just be another person in Lilith's life, nothing more.
It had been during Easter break when Rabastan Lestrange suddenly appeared on the doorstep of Lestrange Manor. Rabastan Lestrange was very similar to Lilith. She had his dark hair, pale complexion, and cold personality. Lilith had gotten Cassandra Lestrange's amber eyes and her fiery attitude.
"Hello, Father," Lilith had said to begin the conversation. She was only fifteen at that time. She felt nothing when she looked at her father. Nothing. No love. No surprise. No happiness. It was like she was greeting any other student at Hogwarts. "Pleasure to meet you." At last, Lilith had added in her mind.
Rabastan was a tall and regal-looking wizard. He would've had good looks if it hadn't been for Azkaban. Rabastan seemed weak and malnourished but there was a small spark in his dark eyes. That was the only clue that he was alive.
"Lilith," Rabastan nodded. "It's pleasant to see you, too. I heard that you do well in school and are on the Slytherin Quidditch team." Lilith had almost scoffed at that. Rabastan was obviously not very well-educated about what Lilith did in school.
"I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm not on the team," Lilith shook her head. "I'm on the reserve team as Beater and Chaser. I try my best at school, but I'm not the best in my year." She didn't get fantastic grades but she got good ones. Grades good enough for a Lestrange.
The Lestrange father and daughter didn't talk a lot after that. They could've been two strangers discussing the weather or talking about the Chudley Cannons' latest loss to the Tutshill Tornados.
"I heard that they are welcoming a new Death Eater," Mrs. Lestrange told Lilith as the two walked up the stone path back to the manor.
"Really?" Lilith asked, quickly reaching now and then to wipe away the remnants of the pond water. Her legs were almost completely dry now. There were only a few stray droplets. "Who is it?"
"It's a secret," Mrs. Lestrange shook her head. "Narcissa had told me. Pity that your father and uncle wouldn't be able to attend."
They had been imprisoned back in Azkaban with Lucius Malfoy after fighting with Harry Potter and his friends in the Department of Mysteries at the Ministry of Magic a few weeks before.
"Cassandra, Lilith," Lilith's aunt Bellatrix greeted them. She was already dressed in her usual attire. Lilith and her mother shared the manor with Bellatrix as they were all Lestranges. "Hurry up! We need to go soon. The Dark Lord does not like to be kept waiting, especially at such an important ceremony."
What could be so important? Lilith thought as she hurried up the stairs to change into a more appropriate and formal attire. She decided on a black dress that reached her knees and black flats along with a silver locket. One would think that she was attending a funeral.
Lilith hated to admit it, but she was dead scared of the Dark Lord. She had never conversed with him and wished to maintain that status for the rest of her life. She feared that she would say that wrong thing and that her life would be over because of it.
Lilith walked down the stairs and waited with Aunt Bellatrix for her mother to finish dressing up. Lilith didn't have a wonderful relationship with her aunt, either. She was frightened of her too, and for good reason. Lilith remembered her mother telling her about Aunt Bellatrix, Uncle Rodolphus, and her father torturing the two Longbottom Aurors into insanity. Lilith very well wished that it wouldn't ever happen to her.
After Mrs. Lestrange joined them, all three witches used Side-Along Apparition to Apparate to Malfoy Manor.
Lilith had been to Malfoy Manor many times and was quite used to the huge metal gate though it still scared her a little when it spoke. Lilith had gone to Death Eater meetings a few times though she was quite glad that nothing happened that involved her. She was also glad that she didn't have the Dark Mark on her forearm, like her mother and Narcissa Malfoy. If she did and the teachers at Hogwarts found out, she'd be either thrown out of the school or be imprisoned by the Order of the Phoenix.
"Hurry up, now!" Bellatrix told Mrs. Lestrange and Lilith. Both quickened their pace after passing the gate. The handsome manor soon came into view. Malfoy Manor. Death Eater Headquarters. "We really wouldn't want to miss this."
Bellatrix Lestrange led the way into the manor and to the drawing-room, Mrs. Lestrange and Lilith following soon after.
Most of the other Death Eaters had already gathered there, though there weren't many. Lilith immediately spotted her classmate, Draco Malfoy, standing with his mother, Narcissa. It was not surprising that Lilith's cousin, Theodore Nott, wasn't present.
Mrs. Lestrange had been Cassandra Julianna Nott before she was married and her brother was the father of Theodore, Alexander Nott. He had also been a Death Eater and was currently in Azkaban.
Theodore and Lilith weren't close. They were in the same House, of course, but they rarely conversed about anything but homework and Quidditch.
Lilith gulped a little when she saw the Dark Lord. He was as menacing as ever with his vivid red eyes and snow-white face. She gave a tiny eye roll of disgust when she saw her Aunt Bellatrix smiling and eyeing the Dark Lord as though he were something she desperately prized. Aunt Bellatrix's eyes were almost bursting with lust and passion and her voice dripped with love and loyalty when ever she spoke to him.
Soon, everyone was seated though there were still a few other Death Eaters talking with each other. Lilith was seated beside Draco and Mrs. Lestrange.
Lilith was technically a long-distance cousin to Draco, though they weren't blood-related. Lilith's father was Bellatrix's brother-in-law and Bellatrix was Narcissa Malfoy's older sister.
Lilith and Draco were good friends at Hogwarts, though Lilith wasn't as good of a friend to Draco as Crabbe, Goyle, or Pansy, who seemed to follow him everywhere. Lilith glanced at the young wizard and realized that he seemed nervous and frightened but there was a look of triumph in his grey eyes.
"Fellow Death Eaters," The Dark Lord began to speak. All conversation died out at once. To Lilith, the Dark Lord was very similar to Professor Dumbledore. Whenever either of them started speaking, everyone would stop what they're doing at once and listen. "I have called you all here today for a very special ceremony. An initiation ceremony. Today, we welcome a new Death Eater to our ranks."
Whispers and murmurs broke out along the small group of Death Eaters that gathered in the room. A new Death Eater was really something to celebrate at that time. Many of the other Death Eaters were in Azkaban.
"Draco Malfoy, come up here," The Dark Lord acknowledged the pale boy. Lilith's eyes widened a little and she let out a small gasp as she watched the pale boy walk up to the Dark Lord. Lilith observed that he did not swagger as he usually did. There were even more whispers and murmurs as well as a few gasps of shock. Lilith looked at Narcissa. She seemed extremely frightened.
"Draco Malfoy, do you pledge your loyalty to the Dark Lord and to the other Death Eaters?" The Dark Lord asked, standing up as Draco approached him, drawing out his wand. He towered over Draco.
"I do," Draco nodded, though his voice quivered ever so slightly.
"Will you do your best to complete the mission that I have provided for you? Without anyone else's help?" Lilith furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. A mission? What would Draco be expected to do? "And knowing that, if you had any help, you, your entire family, and the helper will be killed instantly?"
"I will," Draco nodded once more. Lilith could almost feel the excitement and hesitation vibrating from Draco even from far away.
"Will you remain faithful to the Death Eaters and to the Dark Lord and promise to serve them until the day you die?"
"I-I will," Draco said, his voice shaking just the tiniest bit.
"Hold out your left forearm." Draco pushed up the sleeve of his robes and held it up to the Dark Lord. Lilith noticed that it was shivering slightly.
The Dark Lord pressed the tip of his wand to Draco's forearm. Lilith noticed the sudden change in emotion in Draco's grey eyes. Triumph and eagerness was quickly replaced by pain and agony. He was clenching his teeth tightly as the Dark Lord pressed the tip of his wand even harder to his forearm while muttering an incantation. A dark shape was forming onto Draco's pale skin from the tip of the wand. Draco seemed to be doing everything he could to refrain from screaming.
Lilith felt pity for the boy. It seemed as though he were experiencing some sort of hell. Lilith felt uncomfortable seeing Draco like that. Lilith looked beside her and saw Narcissa cover her mouth with both hands in fright.
After a small amount of time, the Dark Lord lifted his wand and the other Death Eaters began to applaud. Lilith couldn't bring herself to. Lilith saw Draco try to grip his left arm but it seemed to sting him. She saw him stumble to and lean against a wall, clutching his arm, his eyes closed and his mouth in a tight, thin line.
"Lilith Lestrange," The Dark Lord turned to Lilith. Almost frozen with shock, Lilith forced her stiff legs to move as she stood up. Oh dear Merlin... She thought. Do I need to become a Death Eater too? How could I ever be of use to the Dark Lord?
"Y-yes, my Lord?" Lilith asked in a voice that was just a little higher than a squeak. She was absolutely terrified though she tried to show no emotion in her amber eyes. She hoped that the Dark Lord wouldn't mind her squeaky, house-elf-like voice.
"Your mother tells me that you are good at healing," The Dark Lord remarked. Lilith could only nod jerkily. She wasn't particularly gifted in the art of healing but there were a few times in which she had helped the school nurse, Madam Pomfrey, heal some students. "Make sure that Malfoy recovers from receiving the Dark Mark. Perhaps we could have you as a healer in our ranks."
"Yes, my Lord," Lilith nodded once more, taking a few deep breaths to calm herself down. You are not going to become a Death Eater, so calm down... Lilith told herself as she walked over to where Draco was leaning against the wall. "I'll do my best."
Lilith took Draco by his right arm and quickly led him out of the room. Lilith and Draco walked into a long corridor and then into the living room. She sat him down in a couch beside the fire.
"Draco, give me your arm," Lilith told him. With high reluctance, Draco complied and shakily showed Lilith his forearm. Lilith gently touched the area beside the Dark Mark and quickly withdrew her hand when she realized it was extremely hot and stung her fingers.
"Ice, you need ice to stop the temperature from rising even further," Lilith muttered. "Milly!" The old house-elf appeared at once with a loud crack. "Get me some ice in a pack and my medicine bag." With a bow and another crack, Milly disappeared.
"It hurts so much..." Draco winced and moaned, staring in shock at his forearm, now branded with a dark snake coming out of a skull's mouth. It was very vivid and a sharp contrast against his chalk-white skin. Lilith turned away from it as it moved quite sickeningly on Draco's white skin. Lilith knew that Draco could very well be acting dramatic and attention-seeking but chose to brush it off. "My arm feels like it's on fire.t"
"It'll be all right, Draco," Lilith awkwardly patted Draco's right arm in an attempt to be comforting. After a bit, Milly came back with a small pack full of ice and the medicine.
"What took you so long?" Lilith snatched the remedies from the house-elf's old wrinkly hands and confronted the house-elf. "You were gone for over five minutes! How hard can it be to fetch ice and a bag?"
"Milly is sorry," Milly bowed. "Milly had forgotten where it was." Almost immediately following her apology, she began to repeatedly bang her head against the floor to punish herself.
"Away with you, Milly," Lilith told the house-elf coldly, though she silently smirked when she saw that Milly was punishing herself. "And, next time, remember where everything is for Merlin's sake!" Milly, now going slightly cross-eyed and looking almost completely dazed, managed a lopsided bow and disappeared with a crack.
Lilith gently tugged Draco's left sleeve back down and rested his arm on the ice packet. She had feared that he would be burning up from the inside but her prediction wasn't true. Moments later, Lilith saw the pain leave his eyes bit by bit though shock still remained.
Lilith took the bottles of calming medicine and shock medicine as well as some chocolate powder. She poured a bit of both potions into a small cup and added the chocolate powder. She stirred the mixture for a bit and handed the cup to Draco when it was well mixed and resembled a cold cup of hot-chocolate.
"Did it... hurt a lot?" Lilith asked as Draco lifted the cup to his lips. "Your mother seemed really worried and looked very pale."
"She always is," Draco muttered, taking another sip from the cup and choosing to ignore the first question. "Mother is always too overprotective. I wanted a chance to prove myself and I got one. Father would've been very proud of me. Mother did everything she could to make the Dark Lord change his mind about giving me the mission. She said that I was too young." Us typical pure-bloods, Lilith said sarcastically in her head. Always wanting to please our parents but we can just never please them enough.
She briefly thought of her O.W.L. grades. Lilith had gotten 'Exceeds Expectations' for Arithmancy, Ancient Runes, Charms, and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Lilith had also gotten an 'O' for Transfiguration and Potions as well as 'Acceptables' for Astronomy, History of Magic, and Herbology. However, she had failed Care of Magical Creatures and Divination. She never liked either of those classes anyway, nor did she like the teachers.
Mrs. Lestrange wasn't completely satisfied with Lilith's grades but she had only commented that they were good enough. Lilith promised to do better in her N. E. W. T.s but she felt hurt and angry that Mrs. Lestrange didn't say thing else but 'good'.
"But you are too young," Lilith said, taking the cup from Draco after he had downed every last drop of the mixed potion. "Draco, you are only sixteen years old. Sixteen and already a Death Eater. How many sixteen-year-old Death Eaters have you met?"
"You don't have to remind me, Lilith," Draco glanced at Lilith with cold grey eyes. "But this is what I wanted. I can finally prove myself. I can show others that I'm better at Potter." Lilith sighed. He was as ambitious as always.
"Is this really what you want, Draco?" Lilith asked softly, lifting her eyes to his. She felt worried for her classmate, though it was unnecessary. Draco Malfoy could take care of himself. But a Death Eater in Hogwarts... "Do you really believe that you can do this mission? Do you think that you can live as a Death Eater, bound to the Dark Lord for the rest of your life with no freedom?"
"Yes, of course I can," Draco scoffed, though there was a fleeting flash of hesitation in his words. "I can do this. I know I can. This is the one thing that I want. This is my only chance to prove myself." Lilith didn't believe him. Not one single bit.
A/N: This is a complete rewrite of 'Always There', 'We Found Love', and 'Take a Look at Me Now' with a new main character, new plot, and new point of view (third-person limited). I hope this won't cause any inconveniences to the readers of the three stories. I will not be continuing 'Take a Look at Me Now' in the time being but may choose to continue it in the future. Again, I'm very sorry for this.
Also, I'd like to thank Yemi Hikari for being my Beta Reader for this story and looking over it before I publish the chapter :)
Please review! Feedback is very important to me, good or bad. Feel free to tear it apart and do your best to criticize the living daylights out of me. I will take your opinion to heart and do my best to improve this story the best I can :)
~Ashlyn Malfoy