Disclaimer: I do not own anything relating to CSI or it's affiliates. I am merely a fan whose would like to take already established characters into a story of my own rendering.
Heed
Chapter 1 Heed the Call
Sometimes every lonely heart needs to feel complete. It needs the desire to combine with another in pure bliss and disregard the consequences. It needs to feel real and whole. It needs love.
Sadly, for some the only companion hearts one sees are those with whom they work with. For Sara Sidle, the Las Vegas crime lab served as her job, home, social playground, and singles bar. Like any other woman, she often felt a bond with the coworkers she spent the majority of her waking hours with. Some she felt a sisterly bond to, others a brotherly. Some she convinced herself it was more than a sibling feeling she felt. The respect she had for her boss Gil Grissom often became confused with the word love. Did she love Grissom or admire him. He was practically the main reason she was a CSI anyway. Deep down she knew, after all this time, that even if for one passionate night they merged into one, it could never be love. Grissom did not love Sara. She did not pose an intellectual curiosity for him that others had provoked. He needed more than a common bond a good sex. He needed fulfillment that ran deeper than any kiss Sara could give him.
It's amazing what a bottle of Tequila after coming home from an eye opening night could do for one's thoughts and hopes and dreams. Yes, Jose was the kick back into reality that Sara needed. Watching a family grieve for a sister murdered by her long time friend who loved her had made Sara think. He couldn't handle just being friends anymore and confessed his love. But it was no happy ending as she told him she could never love him as anything more than a friend. Not able to live without her as his lover, he shot her, then himself like a twisted Romeo who instead of dying for love, died for rejection. After wrapping up the case, she handed her report to Grissom and deciding to take one last chance. Rather than beating around the bush, she came out and told him how she felt and needed an answer.
"I don't know what to say Sara." replied a bewildered Grissom, "Why is it so urgent you know now."
Sara sighed and bowed her head. She knew it was over. Looking into his blue eyes she had coveted for so long she said, "Because you just gave me my answer. I couldn't go on anymore without knowing. At least I know." She turned and left. She needed a drink.
She also needed to get laid.
Laughing in her stupor, Sara realized that she had sexual needs that she'd allowed herself to hold back. But in the end, she was a hot-blooded woman who sometimes wanted to just forget the rules of love and get into the pants of a hot-blooded man for one night without regrets or regard. Stumbling to her feet, Sara clumsily sauntered to her bedroom to change into something sexy and dangerous. She was out for meat tonight come what may. Standing before her closet clad in only panties and a bra, her cell phone rang.
Damn. Nothing sobers up one faster than a cell phone call that you know is about to kill your buzz anyway. Stumbling over to the nightstand, she picked up the phone, seeing the caller id as Grissom, answered in her most professional voice she could muster. "Sidle." Sara was never surprised at how a drunk can slur one syllable.
"Sara, it's Grissom." He never took notice of when she was drunk on the the phone. "I know it's your night off, but I need all hands. Mass murder in the desert. From the ways the bodies are arranged, it looks to be a cult killing. Might be suicide but we need you here ASAP."
"OK, let me change." There goes the slurs. The buzz was almost gone.
"Good. Nick said he's stop by to pick you up on his way out here since I think your truck's still in the shop." He sounded distracted.
"OK, I'll be ready in five minutes."
"He'll probably be there sooner." With than Grissom ended the call. No goodbye, no apologies. Nothing.
Sara moved as if she'd never drank a drop of booze that night. Rushing to the bathroom she splashed her face with watch and touched up her makeup and hair. Moving back to her closet, she picked out jeans and a button down top. It was always best to be as comfortable as you could in the desert. Adding a belt and some slip on shoes she slipped her utility vest on just as her doorbell rang. Picking up her weapon and wallet, she opened the door to Nick Stokes, he partner and coworker closest to her age. He too was dressed for the night in tight jeans, a black t-shirt, cowboy boots, and his own CSI vest. He'd recently grown his hair out a bit and it was obvious that he'd been asleep when he'd gotten the call.
Smiling, he held up a hand to wave. "Well good evening Ms Sidle. You do look lovely and ready to process bodies."
"You solved your last case didn't you." Nick was always a bit more cheerful than usual when he was able to give families closure.
"Why yes I did. Now let's open up a new one!"
"I hate you." Sara said as she furrowed her brow while walking out the door and following Nick to his Denali.
Opening the door her Sara, he snuck around the back of the vehicle to the drivers side and slid in. Looking over at his partner, his smile grew when she smiled back. In her hand was the coffee he'd bought her on his way. Just the way she liked it. Sara took a sip as Nick started the engine. "Now I know you secret." Sara said with a sneaky smile creeping across her lips. Nick loved it when she smiled. It was a shame they worked together, but he vowed never to date anyone from work. Still, he loved to flirt with her and to make her smile any way possible,
Sara allowed herself to easily fall into deep conversation with Nick as they headed out the the desert. It was a good forty-five minute drive and between the coffee and talking, Sara was soon sober and ready for work. Nick noticed the change as well. He knew Sara often drank to unwind. So did he, but he always tried to keep himself under the limit in case he had to work. Sara had on occasion come to work hungover or, worse, still intoxicated. It was one of the reasons he'd bought the coffee. They both had been off tonight and he knew she'd be drinking alone just as he had been. But he's stopped at three beers. He'd seen the bottle of Tequila in her living room
It had become quite as they were in between subjects. Sara drank the last of her coffee and Nick cleared his throat. It was now or never. They were almost to the crime scene. Looking over at her, he caught her eye. "How much did you drink tonight?"
Without missing a beat, Sara quickly replied, "I'm sober now. What does it matter?"
"Because it's not the first time." He said quietly. It was time to get it all out. "You only do it when you've either had a bad case or." He paused. It hurt him to confront her but someone had to stop the nonsense "Or when you've talked to Grissom. He's the smartest man I've met when it comes to science." Nick stopped the car and looked at her. "But he's a fool when it comes to life and relationships. You get what I'm saying."
Sara was shocked. Not about the subject, but about who was telling her this. Her guard grew and she became angry. "It's over with us. I confronted him before I got off shift this morning it's over. I see now. Not that it's any of your business who I talk to and what I do on my own time."
"It is when it affects the team. So you gave up one him today. But what about tomorrow? What about tonight? If this case had been in town, you'd have showed up with blood shot eyes and liquor on your breath, just like I found you."
"It was my night off."
"It was mine too but I know when to stop and to know when enough is enough. Being buried alive has taught me to live a little, but not at the expense of others."
Sara couldn't counter. She sat still and silent. He figured her out. He was the only one who figured her out. She looked at his. His face was slightly red and his chest was moving quickly as his heart fought to slow down. Taking another deep breath, he continued when he realized he wasn't going to get a retort from her. "This is all we have. Our lives aren't that exciting outside of this world. Look at us. We're both over thirty with no lives and no families and no hope for the future in the romance department. But we have a family here." He said pointing to the lights illuminating the sky about five miles from where they were. It was the crime scene. Sara hadn't realized how close they actually were. "The least we can do is stick up for each other and comfort each other, not go to the bottom of a bottle every time we have a bad day 'cause let's admit it darlin', we have plenty of bad days."
Sara smiled slightly. "Why are we so screwed up Nick? Why did we choose this life?"
"We like playing with fancy toys and dead bodies."
Sara punch Nick's arm softly and they both chuckled a little. Nick took off his seatbelt and hugged her. He held her close and for a moment, wanted to give in to the desire. Biting his bottom lip, he separated himself from her.
Sara savored the smell of his aftershave and held back a desire to rub her hands over his back until she found the bottom of his shirt. When they parted, she saw he felt it too. Neither wanted what they felt was right. It was too easy to screw up their family. Sara shifted in her seat and looked ahead while Nick re buckled his seatbelt. He switched gears and they quietly finished their drive to the crime scene.
"Finally." We have a lot of work to do." Catherine said as Sara and Nick got out of the vehicle once they reached the crime scene. Catherine followed them to the back of the Denali where they got their kits out and continued to fill them in on what was going on. "This is not good. We have fifty bodies out here. Twenty-five are bound and the other twenty-five are dead right behind them. Looks like mass murder-suicide, but we're thinking murder-murder based on the fact that A: no murder weapons and all victims were stabbed in the chest once, B: the hearts are missing from the first set of victims, and C: It's Grissom's current theory."
"Sounds like fun. Where do you want us?" Nick asked as they strode up the the bodies.
"We've separated into groups of ten." Catherine said pointing to the organized chaos in front of them. "They're taped off in different colors so we know who processed what. Warrick has the yellow group, I have the red, Grissom has the blue, Nick, you've got the orange, and Sara has the green. We've got Greg doing a parameter search and Sophia's offered to help him. Have fun and put a tag on the bodies you're ready for the corner to process when you're done. David, Doc Robbins and some daytime corners are on their way. Have fun."
Catherine went back to work in her area leaving Nick and Sara to head to their's. Sara started to walk away when Nick gently grabbed her arm. "Can we talk some more on the way back?"
"Yeah. We'll talk." Sara replied. Then she smiled, "But I bet I can process faster than you can."
"You're on, Sidle." Nick said holding out his fist. Sara punched his fist with hers, then the two separated to get to work. It was going to be a long night.