KITG: Okay, I blame the meds and Emery board for this fic….its all her fault!

Chapter 1: Flying rats

"And in further news, several people have reportedly been attacked by pigeons today in Trafalgar Square. While three of the seven casualties were clocked in and out of the hospital within hours, suffering only minor injuries, a twenty-three year old woman was sent to intensive care after a beak wound to the eye. Scientists say this is an isolated account, and predict that there should be no further trouble with the birds of Trafalgar Square.

And in the sport…"

Owen stifled a yawn, flicking through the TV channels. News, more news, sports (boring, the Ashes were on . . . Australia was a sure beat, unless some mass-murdering fanatic opened fire on the team as they started their bowl), cooking show, men and motors, news . . .

Owen quickly back- pedalled a channel, and settled in to watch the most interesting thing in the base –women's mud wrestling.

Admittedly, he could get in trouble with Jack for bunking off –but that as a pretty moot point, considering there was no work to bunk off from.

Tosh was sitting at her computer, being as annoyingly multi-tasking as ever, running some sort of linguistics schematic through the new bit of telepathic enhancer they'd scooped up from the bottom of the Thames while she IMed Gwen from the other side of the room. She was, from what Owen could glimpse of her monitor, telling Gwen how to upgrade her computer. In Owen's opinion though, to judge from the acronyms liberally scattered over the text like sprinkles on fairy bread, the main content of the message was going over Gwen's head and straight into orbit.

Gwen sighed. She was, at the moment, playing secretary to Jack, partly because she was bored, but mostly because there were certain things you didn't ask Jack to do when he was bored. The last time she had let him on the phone during a lull, the head of the CIA had refused to speak to them for weeks.

Stick-it notes were liberally plastered to the manila folders on her desk. Tell UNIT we don't have the damn Vergoan ship was a typical example, with another note slightly below it reading Get Ianto to stash the ship somewhere UNIT can't trace it ASAP.

Gwen rolled her eyes. So much for interdepartmental cooperation . . .

Flicking aside a note marked, Let HRH know dinner on Friday is fine, Gwen looked up at Jack's open office door. Inside, she could see Jack cleaning his gun for the fifth time, and occasionally sneaking glances at Ianto as he pottered happily around the little kitchenette.

Subtlety was obviously not Jack's forte . . . she never would have pegged him and Ianto though. After that whole thing with his girlfriend becoming a Cyberman and nearly killing them all . . . but then, that was part of the weirdness of life at Torchwood.

She could see Jack was getting bored…and that was always a bad thing. Last time he had been bored he had packed them off on a team building exercise…which turned out to be a few days in a boot camp.

It had not been a resounding success. Owen had fallen face-first into a pile of stinging nettles, Ianto had pined without his kitchen, and Gwen had managed to get involved in the Cardiff version of a Spanish bull-fight, ending with Jack stunning the irate bull.

When an alien threat had popped up halfway through the little trip, the three of them could have kissed it in gratitude. Pity they had ended up having to shoot the thing . . .

Ianto was still bustling happily in the kitchen, like some sort of eager participant in Happy Families, and Gwen felt her interest piqued. True, anything more exciting then watching the fungus grow on Owen's left-over curry would have gotten her attention, but Ianto had been nearly jumping around like an excited toddler with the package she and Owen had helped him get in this morning.

"Oh yeah baby…you get 'er!"

Gwen just rolled her eyes. Owen could be so annoying sometimes. It made it hard for her to understand why she had slept with him. If they had met outside Torchwood she never would have given him the time of day . . . but again, that was the strangeness of Torchwood.

"You're such a pig, Owen!" Tosh exclaimed, as she spun on her chair and caught him with the mud-wrestling. Through a little manipulation on her computer, she flipped the channel back to BBC news.

"Oi! I was watching that!" Owen protested.

"Well unless its alien mud…it's not important." Tosh ignored his whine with the skill of long practise. Gwen just smiled as Owen started to sulk.

The sound of combat boot shod feet down metal stairs rung out as Jack descended from his office.

"Okay, its official . . . I'm bored," Jack sighed as he looked at his team

"Run for hills . . . Jack's bored," Gwen wailed in a doom voice. "We're all gonna die! Let's throw Owen to the Weevils while we have the chance!"

Ignoring Owen's affronted look, and Tosh's hopeful expression, Jack laughed, swinging around behind Gwen's chair and putting her in a neck hold.

"You find my boredom amusing, PC Cooper?" he asked in a mock-stern voice.

"Immensely, sir," she agreed, laughing as he poked her in the side and looked up at the news

"Terrorists, lottery, Jade Goody . . . I swear she's an alien . . . lets go and get Jade Goody!"

He got a mad gleam to his gaze as he looked to each of them. Tosh and Gwen exchanged looks. If someone didn't act quickly, they could very easily find themselves out on a hit.

"Jade's not an alien," Tosh smiled a smile of infinite patience, as if she was dealing with a 5 year-old

"No, I'm with Jack on this one . . . she has to be . . . with that mouth . . . maybe she tries to suck a man's brains out through . . ."

"Shut up Owen!" Tosh and Gwen shouted at the same time.

"You didn't know what I was going to say!" Owen whined.

"Yes," Gwen retorted. "We did."

Abandoning Owen and his twisted mind, Gwen wandered over to Ianto. He had been very quiet in the little kitchen area of the hub. Jack had appropriated the remote from Owen and was flipping through the news channels, making bored comments with every flick.

"Maybe that tornado's the result of an alien secret weapon!" Gwen heard him say.

"Jack, it's not even a proper tornado," that was Tosh's voice, the infinite patience wearing slightly thin. "It's not even a storm."

Jack's voice, affronted. "Well, it could be!"

"Everything alright, Ianto?" she asked, skipping up into the little alcove.

It was very hard to read Ianto. You never knew it he was happy, sad, pissed off . . . he just was there. But this time he seemed glowing. Ianto moved to one side to reveal a shiny coffee machine. It was one of the old types, all shiny copper and brass, like it had just come out of a French café.

"Oh, new coffee maker?" she remarked, impressed. "God, I haven't seen one of these in ages."

"I was just about to try it out. Would you like some?" Ianto asked in his butler like tone.

"Coffee from a machine like that?" Gwen grinned. "Please."

Gwen walked back to her computer to continue writing. Tosh was still upgrading hers, around her the various screens showed the external cameras. None of them were paying much attention to the screens.

But, if they had been, they might have noticed the pigeons sitting round the millennium fountain all turn towards the few civilians that were milling around.

The birds seemed to move as one towards them, hopping along the ground then jumping to the wing and swooping in on the poor pedestrians. They tried to run from the assault but ended up getting pecked and scratched, disappearing under the magnitude.

Back in the hub Owen was walking past Tosh's desk when he looked up.

"Um guys . . . the flying rat attack today . . .?"

"Flying rat?" Gwen looked confused.

"Sorry, meant pigeon attack."

"What about it?" Jack was about to take a bite out of his sandwich when it disappeared courtesy of the pterodactyl. "Oi!"

The prehistoric reptile looked quite smug with itself that it had gotten the sandwich off him.

Until it actually tasted it, that is.

She screeched, spitting the offending item out. It landed with a slight sploosh in the bowl at the base of the fountain.

"Ha, that will teach you! Nick my Marmite sandwich would you"

He missed his entire team cringed at the mention of Marmite.

"Well," continued Owen, undeterred, "whatever it was….it's happening outside," he nodded his head towards Tosh's monitor

They all rushed up, crowding round Toshiko and almost burying her slight form. They watched as birds swooped in attacking the people. Already they could see the marks of blood on the ground. One woman was writhing around, her hands over her left eye, her face covered in blood. Then as soon as it started it stopped. The birds flying away in fright and confusion.

"What the hell?" Jack exclaimed

"Okay, what the heck was that?" Owen just looked at the footage as police and ambulances turned up.

"Freaky," Gwen whispered.

Owen's eyes lit up. "Hey . . . maybe it's a take over the world thing!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah right . . ." Gwen rolled her eyes, and started flapping her arms.

"We are the master race," she cooed, "The time of man is at an end. The flying garbage disposal systems will rise! Give us all your bird seed…coo"

Jack snorted into his coffee and Tosh tried to hide her smile.

"Right people," Jack looked happy, for the first time that day. Well, the first time that day while Gwen could see him, anyway . . .

"Let's get to work. Owen, go out there and get some of those birds for examination. Tosh, check to see if there is any signals or anything that could cause the flying rats to go crazy. I want to know what could cause massive aggression like that, and why just the pigeons? Gwen . . . you're with me. Let's go and see what your old friends at the station say."

Jack grabbed his RAF jacket, the slate grey material giving him more presence…if that was possible.

Gwen picked up her leather jacket and ran after him; they decided to go through reception, as suddenly appearing in the paved centre near the millennium fountain with all that going on would draw attention, even if the entrance was shielded from view.

What they appeared into was nothing more than chaos. To think this was cause by flying rats seemed impossible to conceive. Police were moving around as if they weren't quite sure how to react to this. Already people were claiming it was a result of bird flu, making the winged creatures to go mad. Others were sprouting the usual end of the world stuff and still more were saying that the time of the animal's retribution against human cruelty was at hand.

Gwen walked up to Andy, her old partner. Not for the first time she felt the guilt for suddenly leaving the force. It was never plainer as Andy now regarded her with varied wariness and distain. No one in force liked Torchwood. And to be absolutely fair, why should they? They came in and covered everything up, leaving nothing for the police.

We come in, Gwen corrected automatically, then smiled.

"Hello, Andy."

"Hello, Miss Cooper," he replied in an icy tone.

"What happened to Gwen?" she asked, keeping her smile with difficulty.

"Yeah, what did happen to Gwen?" the tone was the same as before.

She sighed. Well, if Andy wanted to play it that way, she wasn't spraining her neck to be friendly.

"So what have you found out, Officer?" Gwen asked, keeping her voice "strictly business".

"Seems some birds decided to attack the populace . . . or has Torchwood made you go blind?" he indicated the scene of blood in the area. She could see Jack looking at what was left of someone's eyeball.

"I could see just fine thank you Officer. Now if you will excuse me" She made a move to go after Jack, but a restraining hand was laid on her arm.

"What do you think you're doing?" Andy snarled at her. "This is a normal investigation. Torchwood doesn't need to be here. I think we can handle it."

"Do you want me to read the small print on my ID?" Gwen was now officially sick of being fair, and just wanted Andy to back the hell off.

"I can, you know. We have jurisdiction over any investigation we deem necessary. And Andy" Gwen smiled at him icily. "For the sake of our friendship, I suggest you take your hand off my arm before my boss walks over and makes you take it off me. He doesn't like people hindering his investigation."

Andy looked to where Jack had been kneeling before. He had been engrossed on the lone eyeball –but now his full attention was on Andy, and he did not look happy.

Slowly Andy let go of Gwen's arm. Without saying anything or turning back Gwen walked towards Jack. His gaze never left Andy's, and Gwen felt sorry for her old partner. Jack just had a way of either making you think he was your best friend . . . or worst enemy.

Jack still hadn't moved his gaze from Andy. "He giving you trouble?" he asked.

"Nothing I can't handle. The usual "you're on my turf" argument," Gwen sighed as she looked to the eyeball.

"If you need…" Jack left the question open. Letting her decide what she would like him to do.

"No, its okay, Jack. If I can't handle one officer, then I'm no good to you." Gwen dismissed her feelings about her past friends for the moment to get on with the job. "Any idea's what this could be?"

"Could be many things. The Rift could be causing them to go mad"

Gwen disagreed. "If that's so, why now? Wouldn't it have been a more gradual thing?"

"True." Jack looked thoughtful. Gwen could see Owen walking towards them now, he had in his hand he held three clear plastic bags, a dead pigeon in each.

"And why only pigeons?" he added to her question.

"So is it some kind of mind control?"

"Who the bloody hell would want to control pigeons?" Owen joined the conversation.

"Tosh," Jack talked through his Bluetooth to Tosh in the hub, "found anything?"

"Nothing, although if it is some kind of control, I wouldn't expect to find anything. I'm setting up a program to search in case this happens again. If it does, we'll be able to find out for sure if they are being influenced by something." She replied.

"Okay, looks like we have learned all we can here. Let's go back to the Hub." Jack turned to walk back but tripped over something. He managed to stop himself falling onto his face, looking as though he had skipped.

Gwen looked down to see what he had tripped over. At first she couldn't see anything. But then it flashed in a rainbow of colours like the sheen on oil. She reached out to pick it up, feeling the hairs on her arm stand on end like static.

"Jack?" she said cautiously.

Jack, alerted by her tone, came over, then frowned when he saw her hands apparently empty. He opened his mouth, then shut it abruptly as he too saw the flash. He shot a look at Owen, who handed him a bag. Taking the thing almost reverently from Gwen, he placed it inside. His hair was standing on end, like a ghost caress to the skin.

"Don't know what it is . . ." he said, in answer to the pair's enquiring looks in his direction. "Haven't seen this before, and that's not a good thing. Come on lets run some tests."

Jack spun back to the reception, his coat flaring out behind him. The three of them walked together, side by side as they passed Andy and a pair of his coppers. Jack gave Andy the evil eye again, as though just to make his point clear, which Officer Andrew was more than happy to pay back in kind.

Then he looked back at Gwen, and she saw that all three of the officers were glaring at her with a dislike that seemed to border on active hatred. She shivered almost unnoticeably under the looks, something that did not go unnoticed by Jack or Owen.

She almost smiled when she saw Jack double his evil glare, joined this time by Owen.

He may be a wanker, she thought dryly, but he's our wanker.

But, now she realised that her past was finally closed. The bridges had been burnt, never to be repaired. Jack was looking at her now, and she knew he'd caught the moment of her revelation. She elbowed him gently, in a sign she was okay...or she would be.

None of them saw a lone pigeon look at them with its beady black eyes that flashed red . . . before flying away into the darkening sky . . .

TBC...

KITG: Don't ask me what i was on when i thought of this...as i have no idea :)