Disclaimer – Disney owns Lizzie McGuire

tormented soul – Thanks for your help with this story.

A/N – "Thoughts" , This is a 'what if' story. What if Lizzie decided to accept a music contract after the IMVAs and moved to Europe.

A/N 2 – Due to the crackdown on lyrics in fics, I've edited this and taken out the song lyrics.

Part 1 – Letting Go

Gordo sat on the deck in the back of his house and let his feet dangle into the water of his family's pool. It was the weekend before they would start high school but Gordo couldn't help but notice that something would be missing, or rather someone. Lizzie.

Lizzie had decided to accept one of the recording contracts she had been offered after the IMVAs and started a singing career in Europe with Isabella's help.

When she had asked for his advice, he didn't know what to say. He wanted to say no, he didn't want to let her go. He had known Lizzie since birth and the longest they had been apart was a few weeks cause of family vacations. If she left, they'd be a continent and an ocean apart. But he couldn't say no, he just wanted her to be happy.

But it wasn't just friendship clouding his judgment. Gordo was in love with Lizzie and if he encouraged her to leave, it'd meant letting go of those feelings. There was no way two teenagers could maintain a romantic relationship that far apart. Plus, he wasn't even sure if there was anything there to even base anything on.

So he told her to follow her heart and he would support her no matter what she decided. It hurt him a little when her heart told her to go to Europe. Lizzie had left two weeks ago.

Miranda had just came back from Mexico when she found out what Lizzie had decided. She barely had any time to even say good-bye to her.

As Gordo stared out into the pool water, he tried to ignore the pain. It was like his insides were being twisted. Everything reminded him of Lizzie and his feelings for her. He kept thinking over and over, "Why didn't I say something sooner? Tell her how I feel. Say something, say anything."

No matter what he tried to do, he couldn't stop thinking about her and how much he missed her.

Gordo knew he should move on, had to move on. He'd just drive himself crazy constantly think about all the 'what ifs'. But he couldn't ignore the pain he felt. His heart felt like it was shattered into a billion pieces.

His parents told him he'd never truly forget her and they'd always be close friends but he'd slowly feel less awkward and less aware about her absence. "I wonder if my feelings for her will go away after a time too?"

He thought about all the times he had been there for her. When she was upset that Danny, Ethan, and the rest of her crushes never noticed her. The moments they had shared in the library. He remembered two times in particular.

Lizzie had been invited to Danny Kessler's pool party but couldn't go because it was her Grandmother's birthday. They had been in the back of the library, in between some of the racks, playing war.

He had been listening to her whine about not being able to go to a party he wasn't even invited too. She was also complaining about how Miranda was now going without her and hanging out with Kate and her little group. He bit his tongue and played the role of the supportive best friend.

When she was complaining about Miranda, "My best friend was going to go without me," he told her.

"So you can't go either?"

"I wasn't invited."

"Oh. That stinks."

"It's the kind of thing you get use to."

"So, your best friend still gonna go?"

"Turns out she can't, its her Grandmother's birthday."

The second time was when that jerk Ronnie had dumped her. She had annoyed Miranda and him to no end because Ronnie was all she'd talked about for that entire week. A few days prior, he had let Miranda cry on his shoulder after a fight she had gotten into about the jerk.

He had been walking through the library when he found her sitting at a table, sniffling and crying as she was tearing pages of her notebook into confetti.

Being the good guy he was, he stopped and asked her what was wrong. She told him Ronnie had dumped her for another girl at his school. If he hadn't wanted to do before, he really wanted to beat the crap out of him now.

"She's probably smarter, prettier, and more fun to be with than me."

"No she's not."

"How do you know?"

"Cause there's no one prettier or more fun to be with than you."

"You forgot smarter."

"Well, I was including myself in that," he had joked and got the desired smile from her.

When she smiled, he felt butterflies in his stomach. He'd almost spilled his guts and told her he'd liked her. But he choked and clamed up.

Gordo hadn't realized until she left just how much of his world centered around Lizzie. Now he felt like there was missing piece, a big piece. Every time he closed his eyes, he'd picture her smiling face. It was weird; he never realized just how much it changed his day just to have her near him.

He had once loved dreaming about her. In his dreams, Gordo wasn't the coward he felt like he was in real life. He could tell her how he felt without fear of rejection. But now those same dreams just seemed to be haunting him. Showing him the life he couldn't have because he was too afraid to take a chance.

She was gone. Gordo didn't know when the next time he'd talk to her much less see her again.

Gordo sighed as he kicked the water and watched the ripples shoot across the surface. He missed her.

She was the eternal optimist; always believing things would work out in the end. Lizzie made him actually see the good in the world, that everything had a silver lining somewhere.

Now he was forced to face the life without her. To him, real life seemed to get just a touch darker.

He hoped his parents were right; that the more time passed the easier it would be to accept that Lizzie was gone. But he wasn't sure if time would heal this wound, it was too deep.

He didn't want to face the reality of the situation. That not only the girl he had a huge crush on was gone but so was his closest friend.

But it wasn't all bad, it wasn't like she was dead. She could still talk to him online and trade emails. Contact wouldn't be completely cut off but it would be severely limited. "But it still won't be the same."

"I don't even know if she liked me back as anything more than a best friend and here I am acting like she was the love of my life. Who am I kidding she never liked me like that. That kiss on the roof was nothing but a thank you. She wants guys like Danny, Ethan, Ronnie…Paolo."

The last name made him cringe and angrier over him than the other boys. She had blown him off to be with the fake. Even though he had tried to warn her something wasn't right, she wouldn't believe him.

"Hell, I showed up with Isabella and she still really didn't believe me."

Looking up at the night sky, "Maybe someone up there is trying to tell me something. Tell me she isn't the one. Maybe I should be with some one who'd wipe away my tears, be there for me when I'm scared." He then laughed sarcastically. "Yea right. Who the hell would do that for me."

As if on cue, he heard the screen door behind him open.

"Hey," the familiar voice said as she walked up to him. Sitting down next to him, Miranda took her shoes off and let her feet dangle in the water. "You ok?" she asked, her question holding a deeper meaning.

Gordo just shrugged. "Everyone tells me it'll get easier but I'm not so sure."

"It will," Miranda said wrapping an arm around his waist. Hugging him, "She was my best friend, my sister, but I'm not even gonna try and imagine what you're going through but the pain will slowly fade. It won't go away but it'll get easier to deal with eventually."

Gordo looked at her for a moment, "Its not so much the friendship I'm having a hard time dealing with its,"

"I know Gordo, I know." Miranda than moved closer to him and tightened her grip on his waist. "I'm sorry I pushed you so hard to tell her."

Without giving it much thought, he wrapped his own arm around her waist. "How could you know? Besides I needed the kick in the ass. I was gonna tell her in Rome, than…well…Paolo was kinda of the final straw. When she blew me off, it hurt and it made me realize that maybe this wasn't such a good idea."

Gordo sighed and hung his head. "I just want to find a girl who'll be there for me like I am for her. Lizzie is there for the important stuff but just as a friend. Brooke was too clingy, she wanted to be together all the time. Parker, maybe, but I don't think I can completely get over getting turned down cause I was short."

Miranda felt butterflies start to crash around in her stomach. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she looked away for a moment. "You can do this. Tell him. It'll make both of you feel better. You can't keep denying this and now you can't use Lizzie as an excuse any more."

Taking a deep breath and summoning her courage, she looked back at him. "Gordo," she said her voice cracking a little.

"Hmm," Gordo said but didn't lift his head up.

Clearing her throat, "You'll find her."

He snickered under his breath, "Yea? So where is she?"

Miranda thought her heart was going to smash out through her chest it was beating so hard. Reaching out with her free hand, she touched her fingertips to his chin and lifted and turned his head so he was looking at her. "She may be closer than you think."

With that, she leaned in and lightly bushed her lips against his.

Pulling back, she looked at him in fear. He held her heart in his hands and it terrified her.

"I'm not over Lizzie," he told her. Gordo watched Miranda look away from him and started to move away from him. He quickly tightened his grip and kept her at his side. Touching her chin, he turned her face like she did before with him. "But when I do, I hope you still feel the same way."

He grinned as he watched her eyes go wide for a moment with realization. When she smiled his grin widened into a smile.

"This as gotta be one of the signs of the Apocalypse," he joked as he pressed his forehead against her's.

"The two of us together? Hell must've frozen over," she shot back.

As Gordo looked at her, it felt like the blinders that had been covering his eyes had been lifted. "How come I never noticed how beautiful Miranda is before?"

"Gordo." Miranda watched Gordo blink, as if snapping out of daydream, and his eyes focus on her's. "I wonder where he was just then." Pushing the thought aside, she took a deep breath, "As much as I like you and really want to be with you, I don't want to be your rebound girl."

"I don't want that either. I care about you too much to play you like that." He than smiled for a moment, "And I don't want to be your rebound guy."

Miranda looked at him confused for a moment. "What are you talking about?"

Gordo started snickering, "Well, you got dumped by a McGuire too."

She looked at him for a moment, completely confused, and then suddenly, it hit her. While she tried to fight it, a smile spread across her face and she laughed, "I told you, we never talk about that again."

"Too bad," Gordo said, amusement still in his voice, "I like embarrassing you." Slowly the smile turned into a small grin as he looked at her for a moment, "You're cute when you get all flustered."

Miranda quickly looked away shyly, her face reddened a little, but the corners of her mouth were twitching upward.

"Sorta of like this," Gordo whispered in her ear.

"Shutup," she said softly and Gordo laughed a little at her.

For the next hour or so, they sat side by side on the edge of the pool. After a brief conversation about going back to school and starting High School, they sat in silence and listened to the night sounds around them.

Gordo slowly picked his hand up and just as slowly, put it over Miranda's. Gordo glanced over at Miranda nervously and saw Miranda looking back at him out of the corner of her eyes.

She slid her hand out from underneath his hand and moved it so she was now holding his hand. As they tentatively intertwined their fingers, they smiled shyly at each other.

Miranda watched Gordo looked back down at the water for a moment and could tell he was thinking hard about something. "What is it?"

"I'm trying to think of something profound to say but I'm not sure what."

Snickering a little, Miranda grinned. "You don't have to say something profound," she said mocking him a little. "Just say the first thing that pops into your head. No matter what it is."

"The first thing?" Gordo said a little wary and she nodded. "Ok." He then cleared his mind and said the first thing that came to him, "You're beautiful."

Miranda sat there stunned for a moment. "What?"

"You're beautiful," he told her again with a grin, "You said to say the first thing that popped into my head and that was it."

After a few minutes of silence, Miranda try to casually look over at him. "When you do get over Lizzie, you'll tell me?"

He looked at her with a small smile and lightly squeezed her hand, "You'll be the first person I tell."