AN – I do not own anything but my plot. Unbetaed so I apologize for any awkward dialogue and format along with any errors.
Clint isn't exactly sure what it was that triggered Tony (actually, no, he had a pretty good idea but he isn't 100% certain, not like he should be considering how close they've all become) but he and the others could only stare horrified as the man became trapped in his own mind, shouting at and for people no longer there.
It was Thursday and thus, movie night. The tradition had begun not too long after Stark had invited them all to come live at the Tower; beginning when Thor had become homesick, missing the 'glorious tales of valor and honour recounted in the Great Hall' along with his family and friends. While Tony could do absolutely nothing about the latter (though he along with Jane, Bruce and surprisingly Reed were working on getting the Bifrost fixed), he had immediately led the Norse God to the living room and put on How to Train Your Dragon. He figured that the movie's setting was one similar to that of the old Norse Vikings, they seemed to have a similar warriors culture and hey, dragons. Can't go wrong, right?
It soon became a weekly thing, for all of them to settle in on the enormous couches and watch a movie of some kind. What they watched depended on the general mood and mostly how Steve and Thor were feeling as Thor's Day Movie Night was also a chance to expose them to modern day and Miguardian culture. Usually they just watched whatever, but there were times when a specific genre was picked for the evening.
There had been documentary nights including films like An Inconvenient Truth, Supersize Me, Miss Representation and This Film Is Not Yet Rated on the days that everyone had, quite frankly, become tired of dealing with all the more personal crap that happened in their daily lives and were in no mood to watch fictional characters have to deal with the same problems (well, similar problems, as not even fictional characters had problems quite like theirs after all). Those films also had the bonus of providing specific information on material that at least one of them didn't know. Though on similar days where they instead really just needed a break from reality altogether, they usually went for fantasy or sci-fy movies like Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, Labyrinth or Star Wars instead.
Nights of historical dramas and the like were the most common with films such as Hunt For Red October, Dances With Wolves, Hotel Rwanda, The Lives of Others, Selma, Gangs of New York, Dr. Zhivago and Elizabeth making an appearance. This was due to the fact that while Steve had missed the last seventy years, Thor was also behind by about one thousand or so and both enjoyed having a visual when learning about things. While usually fairly dark (because sadly peaceful times in history are not nearly interesting enough to warrant a movie), they were a convenient way to cover the most basic aspects of an event or period in history while adding a human element and giving the pair a visual to go with events they had only read or heard about (if at all).
Tony had even secretly had JARVIS go through the reviews of any movie they saw that fit under this category looking specifically for complaints of inaccuracies so if there were only a few they could be pointed out before the movie or, if the movie was really not at all faithful to the events or time period, avoided all together so that the pair wouldn't get confused. Some nights they even watched movies set in the Depression or World War II like Saving Private Ryan, The King's Speech, Paper Moon, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Great Escape, Grapes of Wrath and Schindler's List when Steve was in a don't-coddle-me sort of mood. Though in those cases they usually paired them with a more light-hearted film after and someone always had a remote handy to pause it when it (and the memories that usually came with the more familiar settings) got to be too much.
Really light-hearted movies, mostly comedies and cartoons like Farris Bueller's Day Off, Space Balls, Lilo & Stitch, Up and The Sound of Music were typically reserved for the Bad Days when someone couldn't outrun the nightmares or when missions went to hell or there was that one civilian they had been unable to get in time. They were the movies where the good guys won, where bad things happened to only bad people, where evil could be vanquished or converted through persistence and heart, where problems were small and where everyone nearly always lived or at least died well and cleanly. They were the ones to watch when no one was yet ready to face the horrors of the day in their dreams and would marathon until everyone fell asleep in a pile in the living room. Over time, it was on these days that they managed to go through all the Disney and Pixar movies along with all the other animated classics.
On the not-quite-so-awful but still emotionally draining days, they broke out the movies that were old favourites or that they couldn't resist poking fun at. So when Tony was upset, a movie on homicidal AI's and robots was the way to go while if it was Clint or Natasha, a spy movie or a bad action movie was just about guaranteed to get them to laugh and for Bruce, it was usually a movie with bad science. Otherwise, movies like Plan 9 From Outer Space, Tank Girls, Batman and Robin and Reefer Madness worked just as well.
Classics Night was when movies like The Maltese Falcon, Gone with the Wind, King Kong, Ivan the Terrible and anything by Charlie Chaplinwas shown. These were the nights when Steve got nostalgic and wanted to 'show off' some of the movies he'd grown up with and after getting used to what were now seen as 'bad' special effects, they were nearly always a hit.
They usually looked forward to movie nights regardless of what they would end up watching and, depending on their schedules, would sometimes turn them into movie day. It was supposed to be their time to relax, to wind down; so seeing Tony go abruptly from calm and relaxed and to a full-fledged flashback was a little upsetting.
Having spent most of their recent down time on a James Bond marathon, they had gotten all the way up to the more recent films and had been watching Casino Royale when it happened. It was one of the rare films that no one had seen (at least not in its entirety) so when Vespa drowned, it came as a bit of a shock to all of them. It caused Steve to get up and leave the room as soon as he realized what was happening, Bruce following after and Thor following both of them in case he could offer any assistance. Clint lunged for the remote to stop it while Natasha on the other hand was the only one to turn immediately to Tony.
Clint wasn't far behind though as he had picked up the man's body language around water and had seen the signs for all that Tony hadn't said anything. He had noticed the lack of bath tubs and Tony's aversion to standing water and had guessed that it stemmed from what happened to him in Afghanistan and then, more recently, in the incident a week and a half ago with the Mandarin.
He hated that he was right.
Gone was the self-confident, proud genius and in his place was a terrified broken man. In the seconds that followed him pausing the movie, Tony had just about vanished over the back of the chair and had wedged himself into the corner, curled up tightly in a ball, pale and shaking.
He wished though that Tony wasn't quite so proud and determined to pretend that nothing bothered him. They were all a little messed up and letting them know what could trigger a panic attack or even that he had panic attacks would've been nice to know. Not that he was blaming Tony for having attacks, but it would've helpful to know(or rather have it confirmed) that water and drowning could trigger him then...well he isn't quite sure what he could've done different in this case but something.
After this, he would talk to JARVIS and Tony about adapting the historical accuracy program into a potential trigger search program. 'Cause he was not okay with seeing someone he was beginning to trust and view as a friend retreat into his mind and once was too often to have this happen.
Nothing they could do about that now. Instead, the two spies did the best they could to calm their friend down; slowly moving some of the furniture away so the space he had squeezed himself into wasn't so claustrophobic before they shared a helpless look.
Now what?
Throw a bunch of traumatized superheroes in a house together, and there was bound to be moments when they were not okay. They all had had their moments, to the point where they knew each other's signs and would try to head it off; only Tony had seemed immune. They all had had times when they just felt off, others when they were in a mood or downright not really present and they all reacted differently to help. And they all needed different things when triggered badly like this.
It was best to leave Natasha alone until she had managed to ground herself mostly in the present before discretely herding her down to the training room and putting on angry music for her to shadow-fight and dance to until she fit under her skin again. Then she would typically seek him out and quietly sit by him as he did whatever until she fell asleep.
Frankly, Bruce's issues had issues and was best left alone to his own coping methods because what he needed and what the Hulk needed to stand down changed practically every time. They kept the kettle on and had various supplies on hand for when he finished and they could get close again.
Thor got still and quiet, catatonic almost, and would spend hours looking out a window, thinking over the centuries and what he might have done differently until he convinced himself that everything terrible that had happened in Asgard or the Nine Realms was his fault. As soon as someone stumbled upon him, direct intervention was always needed; Jane would be called, favourite foods would be made, upbeat music played and someone was always with him, steadily talking him out of his funk (Darcy was best at this). Sleepovers were frequent.
Steve was simultaneously the easiest and hardest to help as he stubbornly refused to acknowledge he needed it (he had had only Bucky for a long time, who else would bother?) or wouldn't really be in the present at all, acting like it was 1938 or 1945 for hours on end. On the other hand, all he needed was blankets (quilts or knitted blankets were best) and food, especially home cooked food. It was probably left over from the Depression now that Clint thought about it, as long as you were warm with a full belly, things were okay.
Clint needed company, he didn't need words or a distraction: he just needed someone nearby and a touch to ground him until he convinced his hindbrain that there was solid ground under his feet.
But what did Tony need? Time to put himself back together? Company? Solitude? Quiet? Noise? Should they call in reinforcements in the shape of Pepper or Rhodey? Did he need contact? Counting and breathing?
Natasha had begun talking in low and calm tones, rambling off random trivia, anecdotes and stories while encouraging him to breathe. It was working a little, his breathing smoothing and his body uncurling a little but Tony's terrible-wonderful brain remained stubbornly wherever the scene had sent him.
Clint hated this, he normally knew exactly what to do but one misstep here could send Tony farther into his mind and make him panic more. They would have to wake Pepper or Rhodey up, he thought with a wince. They would answer, help once he'd explained and normally he wouldn't hesitate but he was somewhat loathe to do so considering it was close to three in the morning and Pepper needed the rest she could get (he'd seen her planner once, her schedule was insane) and Rhodey was shipping out bright and early for a training mission in Classified-don't-you-dare-hack-the-Air-Force's-servers-to-sate-your-damn-curiosity-Stark.
The pair would never see helping Tony as a burden (though maybe irritating on occasion) and would not once object to be woken up over this but Clint still didn't want to partly as they were only ones with immediate responsibilities in the morning and needed their sleep but also because Tony was also his friend dammit and he wanted to be able to be the one to help. A little childish of him, true, but the sentiment remained. Shaking his head, he chided himself: he could indulge his issues later, Tony needed help now.
However, before he could pull out his phone out, he saw movement out of the corner of his eye. Turning his head fully, he saw a man he had seen only in photographs prior to this standing at the living room's threshold. His black hair had largely gone silver and was balding with what remained kept in a neat crew cut, had golden-tanned skin (typical of someone from Middle-East), warm brown eyes and simple wire full-frame glasses perched high on his long nose. Clint guessed he was wearing the clothes that he had died in, a once-sharp looking white dress shirt and black dress pants, now creased and dirtied with mud and blood.
While he watched, Ho Yinsen walked over to where Tony was panicking and crouched down in front of him and did a quick assessment; hands ghosting (hah!) over limbs and checking vitals. The man then stood up and grimaced, looking frustrated before noticing Clint watching him. He did a double take at first before seeming to realize that Hawkeye really could see him and walked over to where Clint was standing.
This was a, a gift of sorts, one that Clint had had since he was very young. He couldn't pinpoint exactly when it was he had it had woken in him; just that one day he realized that there was a number of people that he could see that neither Barney not his Mom could. There were spirits he avoided (nasty things done in life visibly tainting them) but otherwise: sometimes he talked to them, sometimes he offered a listening ear and sometimes they taught him things or helped him.
It was handy, especially on OP's.
But yeah, as far as he could figure, he was a medium: someone who could interact with ghosts. Or he was crazy. Either-or, maybe both.
So right away, when Yinsen floated/walked over, he knew what the other wanted and quickly typed out a message on his phone (so as to not appear crazy by talking to thin air).
Yes I can see you. If you have something to say or do that could help Tony, we could figure something out.
When the other man tilted his head questioningly, he gave a small smile and spread his arms in invitation though he held out ten fingers first and mouthed his stipulations.
Ten minutes, no more.
He had learned his mistake earlier and fortuitously it had only been with a moderately benevolent spirit who had just wanted to visit her wife the next state over; it had only taken a week and a half later before he had had his body back under his control. Since then, he had always been certain to limit how long a spirit could use his services as, as long as he stated his conditions, whatever power it was that governed his ability would forcibly eject them if they didn't abide. He was comfortable enough with Yinsen and his history to trust that any other rules seemed unnecessary but he always stuck by the time limit.
Yinsen paused and nodded before stretching out a hand to take his and then Clint felt himself... loosen and be pushed back in a way as Yinsen took control (he wasn't Loki, this was okay).
In hindsight, he maybe should've warned them what he was about to do…
Yinsen briskly crossed the room before slowing to telegraph his movements and squishing in beside Natasha to gently place a hand between the-ball-that-is-Tony's shoulder blades. Clint saw Natasha watching him out of the corner of his eye, a rare look of befuddlement on her face and as he turned to Tony he saw her expression then shift into shock (as Tony seemed to minutely jump and wince simultaneously) when he opened his mouth and in a voice not his own said, "Now then Stark, I want you to breathe with me. Ready? In-two-three-four and out-two-three-four, in-two-three-four and out-two-three-four…" Yinsen carried on until Tony unballed a little and, from what could be seen of his face, appeared to be a little more aware though incredibly confused. "Good, good. You are safe and at home in your tower with your five comrades, your lovely lady and the War Machine are still sleeping two floors up and your many creations still watch and guard your building. You are safe."
Yinsen stood and seemed to zero in on the board games stacked beside the TV and quickly unearthed a backgammon set before he gently moved Natasha out of the way and plonked himself back down in front of the almost catatonic genius.
"I want you to think of five different things you feel right now, then of four things you smell then three things that you hear and two you can see. This is real. I know it might not seem like it, but you are home, this is real. You are hearing me as you have a good friend in Clint. His gift is what is allowing me to tell you that it was I that removed exactly twelve pieces of Jericho shrapnel in order to save your life and made an electromagnet with a car battery to save you from the six pieces I could not. If you are still in doubt, the last I spoke to you was to tell you to not waste your life: and you have not. I am astounded and proud to see that you have owned your mistakes, done what you could to fix them and have gone on to try to become a Guardian for the whole planet."
As he spoke, Yinsen quickly began to set up the board; not in the standard starting position but instead reflecting a game in progress. (See image below) White had played decidedly more cautiously with its counters all being doubled up with half in their "home" area though the rest were on the far side of the outer board while nine of black's counters were in their "home" but the remaining six counters were on outer board points and only two were together leaving the other three vulnerable and one was stuck in the "penalty" side until a lucky roll could get it down. Hearing the pieces clack seemed to make the genius come a little further out of his head and some more awareness seemed to come back into his eyes.
"Now, I want you to focus on my voice and on the board; let's see if we can't finish one last game. As I recall, when last we played you had four counters on the twenty-third-point, three counters on the twenty-second-point, two on the twenty-first- and on the fourteenth-point and three single counters on the thirteenth-, tenth- and first-point, and one counter has been blotted. I have two counters on the twenty-fourth-, thirteenth-, ninth-, seventh-, sixth- and third-point and three on the second-point, and neither of us has gotten to the point of being able to bear off. If my memory serves still, you had just finished your turn with a five and six and I had just rolled when we were quite rudely interrupted and have yet to finish our game. I don't quite remember what the result of it was but so in the name of fairness, I will roll again."
He paused a moment, waiting for a response and upon receiving none, simply scooped up the white dice and rolled them, tisking when he rolled a 1 and a 2. "Not what I would have preferred, it is a one and a two Stark. Which means while I can't double up, I can blot your counters on the tenth and twelfth point and you have now three-counters to de-blot." Moving the pieces accordingly, both he and Yinsen were satisfied to hear Tony groan: which admittedly could be a groan of pain but could also be a groan because the inventor was terribly competitive and the position was not a good one to be in.
Yinsen then picked up the pair of brown dice and held them in his open palm as an offering and Clint wanted to whoop when he saw the irritation and calculation in the genius's eyes though was disappointed when Tony didn't unball to take them.
After a pause, Yinsen rolled and said the result "Double fives! You have the luck of the devil sometimes Stark."
Tony let out a pleased chuff and the game continued like that for a few turns with Yinsen narrating his own roll and turn before offering Tony a chance to take his own and before rolling for him and moving his pieces. It was on Tony's third turn, when Yinsen rolled a four and a one that a croaky voice said, "counter on point-four to point-eight and counter on point-twenty-two to twenty-three."
The game then progressed with Tony voicing his movements after Yinsen's roll for him, his alert eyes peeking out over top of knees and it was only when they got to bearing off and Yinsen rolled terribly three times in a row that the inventor took the offered die and uncurled himself enough so he was able to roll easily.
When the game resulted in a narrow victory for Tony, Clint began to feel Yinsen slip away, his time nearly up. The spirit could feel it too and slowly, telegraphing the move, he reached over and placed a hand on either side of Tony's face before kneeling up to gently kiss the crown of his head in benediction. "What happened to me was not your fault. You are a good man Tony Stark; one who will always do the right thing even if it sometimes takes you some time to see what that is."
With that, time was up and he could feel Yinsen fade away. Clint first shook his head then the rest himself as he regained control and then stretched as best he could; promptly discovering that his right leg had fallen asleep.
"Aw leg."
Upon hearing his voice, Natasha just about jumped him. "What the hell was that?"
"Um…" He hemmed, starting at how close she'd gotten while he was still a little wobbly and not quite in his skin. As she quickly patted him down doing a quick head-to-toe check, his mind raced to give a coherent answer.
"That was Yinsen. It's a thing I can do."
Nailed it.
She raised an eyebrow at him, unimpressed.
"It's a thing I could always do?" He said, wanting to flinch when his tone came out uncertain. "It's not exactly something I like to advertise but yeah…" A Cheshire grin stretched across his features as a thought occurred to him and he stage-whispered "I see dead people."
Hearing Tony snort and her almost inaudible chuff of laughter was worth the whack around the head that followed.
He rubbed his head as he schooled his features and said, "But yeah, seriously. It's not exactly a skill I like to boast about – it makes me seem crazy but letting others know that I can see the dead and can act as a medium tends to also attract crazies. Besides, then Loki happened and just, it wasn't need-to-know before. And now it is."
The three of them then jumped when Thor's voice broke the silence up, "So you see spirits? That is a hard gift to be granted"
They turned to see Steve, Thor and Bruce sitting quietly on the couch, pensive looks on their faces.
Clint nodded numbly as the God of Thunder then turned to Tony, "Friend Tony, I am glad to see you returned to us. How do you fare?"
Tony's mouth opened and closed a few times before shaking his head, his expression raw and venerable, and holding up one hand, palm down and wiggling it side to side.
Thor nodded and then said with a smile, "Well, let us know if there is aught that we can do and it shall be done."
When Tony rolled his eyes, Clint smirked to himself, knowing that Thor was playing up how medieval Allspeak could sound to them; knowing it simultaneously irritated and amused Tony and would likely help him further out of the dark places his mind had taken him.
While Thor talked, Bruce had been carefully watching Tony and, having seen something in his body language, slowly approached with a blanket and wrapped it around his friend before sitting beside him and leaning into him. Taking that as the green light it was, Tony immediately leaned back into his friend as all the others came closer.
They stayed like that for some time, quietly supporting Tony and leaning into one another. It was Steve who first broke the quiet, his face unnaturally aged and haunted (perhaps still left over from being triggered by the film?) in the low light. "Clint… if, if you wouldn't mind, could you… I mean would you call Bucky for me?"
Clint blinked in surprise, drawing his mind out a happy doze. "Maybe? I've never tried to summon a spirit before. Anytime I've used this ability, they were already there…"
"If traditional paranormal activities are to be believed, their name, birthdate and deathdate are typically used." Bruce commented quietly.
Clint quickly found himself holding a candle and a piece of paper that had the words James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, March 10th 1917 and January 5th 1945 written down on it and feeling a little bit like a fraud. "So, I, I call James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, who was born March 10th 1917 and who fell to his death in the Alps January 5th 1945."
He waited, but no spirit materialized so he tried again, feeling more inept every passing second. He was about to give up when three spirits materialized in front of him. They were two ladies and a man dressed in their Sunday best, the one was slight, looking about 5'2", with Steve's nose and eyes while the other woman was probably 5'7" and sturdier looking, her brown hair styled carefully and was clutching both the other woman and her husband's (Clint was pretty sure) hand. The man was 6' had a beard, was strong-looking with laughlines around his eyes. Soon after Sarah Rogers, Winifred Barnes and George Barnes appeared, the three Barnes sisters and Howling Commandoes also began filing in.
Seeing Clint's eyes widen, Steve guessed that Bucky must've answered and said, "Did it work? Is he here?"
Clint slowly shook his hand as both George and Sarah pushed Winifred forward who looked him with some terrible and great hope while the rest all stood together in solidarity.
He held up five fingers and said, "Five minutes, no more, and we stay here in the Tower." Adding the extra stipulation as Winnifred looked desperate for reason and desperate women/mothers tended to do crazy things.
Not even a second after she nodded and grabbed his hand and for the second time that night, he let his mind sink back as another took control.
Moments after, he felt his heart sink and a feeling of dread take hold low in his gut as she opened his mouth and said "He's not here." in a voice that shook.
"He's not among the dead"
Unfortunately no image can be added in fanfic's set up so if you want to see how the backgammon board is set up please check out the same story under the same pseudo over on Archive of our own.
So, as I was taught by my mother, in backgammon the terms are as follows: points are the 24 long alternating-colour triangles that serve as the moving spaces (? Is that the right term?), counters are the small checkers, to bear off is when all your pieces are in your "home" and you can start taking them off the board, and blotting is when you land on a lone counter and it goes up on the hinge part of the board (we jokingly called it the penalty box) and you cannot move any other counter until you roll a number that would let it down. Doubles mean that instead of two moves (one per dice: ex if you roll a three and a one you can move one counter three and the other one), you now have four (ex: so you roll double twos, you can move four counters two spaces)
EDIT: There's an unintentional possibility of a sequel with the Winter Soldier (now that have reread it and am thinking about it), if I were to write one, would anyone be interested? Please let me know in the comments (or just drop a review :D )
In case you're wondering about the death date, I tried to figure out when/where Commandoes were to be fighting and as far as can determine (from movie stills and context) is largely after the push North through Italy and D-Day. A still of a map in the movie shows front near towns of Bolzano, Italy, Salzburg, Austria and Holzkirchen, Germany. Then from my knowledge of the front movements combined with how end scene has them in Alps: Austrian and Slovenian side of Alps is very unlikely as weren't really part of Western front, Switzerland was aggressively neutral (both sides largely tried to stay out) and fighting is mostly out of Italy if map front lines were as depicted so and therefore are likely in the south-east of France. Allied forces weren't able to get to that area until after D-Day and the Liberation of France so must be approx. mid-1944 to early 1945 that this is happening. Marvel Wiki only has winter of 1945 written down so went with an earlier date for simplicity sake
