New Chance
"Mommy, Mommy, I made a new friend today!"
"That's great, honey." Chloe shut down the laptop and stood to embrace her daughter. The little girl wrapped her arms tightly around Chloe's knees and Chloe smoothed her hair out of its unruly tangle. "I missed you today, baby."
"I missed you too, Mommy, but Emily's so cool. She's five, like me, and she likes painting."
"You hate painting," Chloe reminded her.
Amy O'Brian beamed up at her mother. "I do not, silly. I just like computers better." She moved away and started for the stairs, her face screwed up in a frown. "I'm trying to remember Emily's surname, she told me and I wanted to be able to tell you," Amy pouted. Chloe knew better than to tell her it didn't matter; she'd grown up hearing those words and knew how belittling they sounded. Instead, she waited patiently for her daughter to think. Suddenly, Amy smiled. "Bauer," she said finally, missing the look that flitted across Chloe's face. "Emily Bauer." With that, she bounded up the stairs to her bedroom, leaving her mother staring blankly after her.
xxx
Jack managed a tired smile as Audrey stepped into the dining room, two cups of coffee in her hands. "Thanks," he told her, taking a grateful sip. "It's been a long day."
Audrey frowned. "Yeah, I guess it has." She watched her husband's face but as usual couldn't read the emotions flickering through his eyes. She sighed. "Emily's really enjoying school, you know. We made a good choice there." She reached across the table and took his hand in hers, frowning when he flinched slightly from her touch. Ignoring it, she pressed on, "I'm thinking of enrolling her in the after school art class they have there; she's got quite a talent, apparently."
"She has," Jack murmured, eyeing the doodle covered pieces of paper littering the walls. He smiled to himself. "Kim was like that, too."
"You miss her."
"Yes, I do, but I'm glad we're trying to work things out. She wants to come over and visit."
"I'd love to see her," Audrey said, trying but failing to feel relieved. She'd though she'd gotten to the bottom of Jack's dark mood, but, if anything, he seemed to have retreated further into himself. She took a deep breath, deciding to bite the bullet. "O'Brian is a common name, Jack. It doesn't have to be her."
His eyes snapped up. "I'm sorry?"
"I saw your face when Emily told us about Amy." She tried a gentler tone. "It doesn't mean she's Chloe's daughter, Jack. It's just coincidence. I know you regret how you left things with her but it was five years ago. You've moved on. We've moved on." She squeezed his hand. "And Chloe's moved on too, Jack. This is Washington DC, what on earth would she be doing here, of all places?"
"You're right," he murmured. He forced a smile. "Do you fancy eating out tonight?"
He saw her visibly relax. "Yes, that would be great. I'll go get Emily ready." Apparently deciding that she'd put a stop to whatever was bothering him, Audrey rose and walked quickly from the room.
xxx
"I'll pick Amy up from school on Wednesdays, if you like. Give you a break." Morris lingered in the doorway to his old home, in no rush to leave. "Makes sense, love, as I have her that evening anyway. Besides, don't you finish work late on Wednesdays?"
Chloe hesitated. "But you work too, Morris. It's fine, really."
"No, I insist, love." He lowered his voice. "I'd really like to pick her up from school. I meant it when I said I'd stick by you with the parenting thing."
"Shame you didn't mean it when you said you'd stick by me in our marriage."
He paled, but held up his hands. "Yes, I know. And for that I am truly sorry."
From inside the house, Amy began shouting. "Listen, Morris, I've got to go." Chloe scowled. "I guess Wednesdays will be okay."
"Thanks, love."
She shut the door and leaned against it, counting to ten before walking up the stairs towards Amy's bedroom. "Did you have fun at Daddy's?" she asked, absently picking up the little shoes her daughter had discarded just outside the doorway. "Yes, Mommy, we watched TV and Daddy helped me with my spellings." She seemed distant, as though she were plucking up the courage to ask something. "Mommy?" she asked finally, as Chloe placed the shoes in their rightful place under the bed. "Yes, honey?"
"Mommy, why aren't you and Daddy together? Emily says her parents are together. Are we normal?"
Chloe instantly went on the defensive. "Who said you're not normal, baby?"
Amy shrugged. "No one. It just... I don't see why she can have a Daddy and I can't."
"You do have a Daddy." Chloe motioned for Amy to join her, and she pulled her into a hug. "Even though Daddy isn't here, living with us, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you."
"Does he love you?"
"No, honey, not any more. That's why he lives in another house." She sighed. "It's complicated-"
"I can understand," Amy scowled, breaking away and marching over to the window. She reminded Chloe so much of herself at that age; mentally she berated herself for thinking that her daughter couldn't grasp what she was trying to tell her. "Amy, Daddy and I don't love each other any more. He lives in another house because we can't live together. You can't be with someone if you don't love them," she added, more for her sake than for Amy's, who was now eyeing her suspiciously. "If you don't love Daddy, then who do you love? You have to love someone, Mommy. No one should be alone."
Chloe felt a small jolt of sadness, but fought it. "I love you, Amy. Now, come on, help me get dinner ready and then we'll have some icecream, okay?"
The bribe worked. Amy quickly changed out of her school clothes and bounded down the stairs, where she and Chloe set about laying the table. Dinner was lively; Amy kept the conversation flowing about her day at school, about Morris's new car and the dog that lived two doors down from him. But all too soon the thoughtful look that had come to grace her young features reappeared, and she began picking at her salad. "Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Can I go stay round Emily's house one day? She said she'd ask her Mom, so I thought I'd ask you."
"Not just now, Amy."
"She's really nice, you'd like her," Amy pressed. Upon seeing that she was fighting a losing battle, she pushed away her food. "I'm not hungry any more. And I don't want any icecream." She'd left the table and headed back up the stairs before Chloe could open her mouth to protest. Choosing to leave her to it, she began clearing away the dinner things, scraping the uneaten food into the bin. She had no doubt in her mind who little Emily Bauer's parents were, and while she hated denying her daughter a play date, a part of her was not ready to face up to a reality she had spent five years trying to forget.
xxx
The house was quiet; Audrey had long since gone to bed, and Emily was sleeping peacefully, nestled between her array of stuffed animals. Jack sat in the darkness of his study, the work he'd told Audrey he was doing discarded across the tidy surface of his desk, his head resting on his arms. Sleep evaded him. His eyes stung from too long spent in front of the computer; cursing, he stood up and flicked the light on. He couldn't get his youngest daughter's earlier words out of his head; "I would really love for Amy to come round one day, Mommy. Is that okay? Is it, Daddy?" Audrey's face had told him it was anything but okay. Gently, she'd told Emily that it was a little early to be inviting people round, especially as she didn't know Amy very well. Jack had countered her, saying it would be good for Emily to mix with her new friends. An argument had ensued, with neither side coming out the winner. Emily had fled the kitchen, slamming her bedroom door as hard as she could. "This is becoming far too frequent," he'd told Audrey, who'd merely nodded her agreement.
They had started arguing shortly after Emily's fourth birthday. He couldn't remember what had sparked it, but knew deep down that it had been waiting to rear its head for some time. She had said something about not understanding him, and why he had turned down the job offer her father had made him. Jack had told her that he had no desire to work for the government again. He couldn't make her see it through his eyes, and he'd grown tired of trying. She'd soon learned to stop questioning his decisions.
As he made up a bed on the couch, he heard Audrey's footsteps above his head. He paused, wondering if she was making her way downstairs, but soon heard the bedroom door close again. Pulling the quilt up over him, Jack stared blindly into the blackness, his mind slowly drifting.
xxx
"I'm really glad Fayed didn't kill you this morning."
"Me too."
Their eyes met, and something passed between them, unspoken but nonetheless powerful. He saw her swallow, start to say something, but she seemed at a loss for words. He reached out and placed what he hoped was a comforting hand on her arm. "I need to go speak to my father now, but..." He found he couldn't continue, didn't want to break whatever it was they were sharing. He smiled. "I just want to thank you, for everything." His eyes searched hers again, and she nodded. He made a promise to come back to her as soon as the crisis was over; he hoped she could see that.
The next time he saw her, she was in her ex-husband's arms. He'd heard that she'd collapsed and had tried to get to her as quickly as he could. He didn't hear all of their conversation; the word 'pregnant' was enough to stop him in his tracks. She'd looked up and seen him, their eyes locking as they had earlier in the day, and he knew that their connection was still as strong as ever. Audrey was waiting for him; somehow he made himself walk away from the reconciled couple and back to the woman he thought he loved.
xxx
Children shrieked, eager to be free of their classrooms and out into the crisp autumn air. Morris waited patiently by the gates, his eyes wandering lazily across the large school yard. He saw Amy and one of her friends emerge from the building furthest to him; raising a hand, he waved, beaming when Amy waved back. She nudged her friend and pointed towards him. In turn, the little girl beside her pointed towards someone a little way across the yard. Curious, Morris shifted his position slightly so as to get a better view. He felt his eyes widen as he took in the sight of Jack Bauer talking to a group of parents. It didn't take Morris long to put the pieces together.
Jack didn't seem to have seen the girls pointing, for he appeared shocked but delighted at the arrival of his daughter as she bounced towards him. He scooped her up in his arms and twirled her round. From where he was standing, Morris could see that the girl had same dirty blonde hair as her parents. He wondered why Chloe hadn't mentioned this to him, but then found the answer to his own question. She didn't know. Or maybe she did, and she'd decided not to make a big deal out of it. It had been five years since she'd seen him, after all.
His attention was distracted as Amy threw herself at him. "Daddy!" she grinned. "Did you see my friend? Emily?"
Morris nodded, anxious to leave before Emily said the same thing to her father. "Yes, I did, love. She seems nice." He crouched down to Amy's level. "Are you ready to go?" She nodded vigorously, and Morris stood once more, placing a hand on his daughter's shoulder. As they made their way back to the car, Emily called out a final goodbye. Amy seemed oblivious but Morris turned. The little girl was lost in the sea of people but there was no mistaking the blue eyes that stared straight back at him. Quickening his pace, Morris hurried Amy out of the school and down the street.
xxx
"I don't know why you insist, Jack."
"Insist on what?"
"On picking Emily up from school every Wednesday. We had a system working just fine with Helen, why couldn't you just leave it?"
Jack clenched his teeth. "Helen is not our babysitter, Audrey. She cleans a couple days a week, although why I don't know, and we can't just expect her to pick up our child from school every night." He let out a breath. "I do not want to have this argument with you."
"Well I think it needs to be said, Jack. We agreed that we would work to bring money in-"
"I want to pick my daughter up from school once a week, Audrey."
"I'm not saying you can't."
"Then what are you saying?"
She stepped closer to him, mindful of the fact that Emily was watching TV only in the next room. Her eyes were cold. "I'm saying, Jack, that I think you're trying to create a rift between us. And it's working." Before he could respond she shook her head. "Don't say anything." Tears leaked down her cheeks. "I don't want to lose you, Jack." He stared after her, a mixture of confusion, shock and anger raging inside him. He took a few calming breaths but knew he was dangerously close to losing his temper completely.
He waited until she'd settled in the lounge with Emily, then he climbed the stairs to his office, shutting the door behind him. Sitting down behind his desk, he absently started up his computer, his mind elsewhere.
He hadn't seen Morris for the past couple of weeks. At first, he hadn't even been sure it was Morris, but then he'd heard that unmistakable British accent and he'd felt his heart drop. So she was still with him. He shouldn't have been surprised; Morris had seemed like a changed man, vowing to do all he could to look after Chloe and their unborn child. Jack himself had seen the way he'd held her in CTU. He wondered if the other man had told Chloe... Jack cut that thought short. Even if he had, it didn't matter.
He didn't tell Audrey that he'd been right, that little Amy O'Brian was in fact Chloe's daughter. He'd tried kidding himself that Morris was with someone else, and that the little girl had nothing to do with Chloe at all, but Emily's vivid descriptions of her new friend had put paid to that idea. Besides, Chloe had already had Amy by the time he'd left CTU; the timing matched.
"Damn it!"
"Daddy?"
With a start, Jack looked up to find Emily staring at him curiously. Forcing a tired smile, he reached out his arms and she flew towards him. "What's the matter, Daddy?"
"Nothing, baby, Daddy's just tired." He kissed the top of her head. "What are you doing up this time of night?"
"Couldn't sleep," came the sleepy reply, punctuated by a yawn. "Can you come read me a story?"
Deciding that he really wasn't going to get any work done that night, Jack nodded and got to his feet. "Sure, baby. Which story do you have in mind?"
xxx
Chloe tried her best to look interested as Morris made small talk. She found their weekly 'family' outings almost unbearable, more so now that he had insisted on taking her and their daughter bowling after the meal. The restaurant had been nice enough, the food delicious, but she'd never been one for extravagance and he knew that.
After they'd separated for the second and final time, they had managed to work out an arrangement whereby Amy would benefit from having both of them around, despite the fact that Morris was no longer living with them. He'd let Chloe have the house with minimum fuss. A part of her wished he'd done more to try and keep it; she had had an apartment already lined up but he'd been adamant, he wanted their little girl growing up in her family home. Moreover, Chloe knew that he didn't want to see her out on the street, either. He'd admitted he was no longer in love with her, and hadn't been for a while, but at the same time she was the mother of his child.
Watching him now, laughing with Amy as he helped her throw the bowling ball, Chloe saw how these visits, however painful for her, were worth it just to see her daughter smile.
"Amy won't stop talking about her new friends," Morris mused, as he sat down once more. One eye on the little girl, he continued, "especially Emily."
Chloe did her best to remain passive. "Yeah, she said you saw her the other day."
"I saw someone else, too."
"Morris, will you just get to whatever point you're trying to make?"
He nodded, and after a few minutes finished, "I saw Jack Bauer."
The battle to keep her face neutral was a difficult one; Chloe couldn't help the hope that flared in her chest at Morris's words. "Well, they live here too," she shrugged, forcing herself to meet his eye. "We were bound to see them at some point."
"Them?"
"Jack and Audrey."
"I never said anything about Audrey, love."
Chloe chose to ignore the comment. "Like I said, we were bound to see them." Morris looked incredulous. "It's been five years, love. And DC isn't exactly a small town." He started to say something else, but Amy was heading back towards them, and he had the sense to keep quiet.
xxx
The airport was crowded. Kim fought her way through the throngs of tourists and business people towards the luggage carousel. She had yet to see her father; he'd told her he would be picking her up, and for that she was grateful. She'd only been to DC once before, and that was with Barry... she shuddered at the thought.
Her suitcase appeared rather quickly, and she heaved it to the ground, glad that she'd left her three extra pairs of boots back in Los Angeles. While the weather here was decidedly cooler, she could always buy something if she needed it. That had been her reasoning, anyway, as she'd ummed and ahhed over her wardrobe the previous day. The time difference was slowly starting to get to her, and she leaned against a wall briefly to catch her breath.
It was a Wednesday, the middle of the week, an odd day perhaps to fly over for a visit but she missed her Dad, and her little sister. And Audrey, she added, although she never had quite been able to get along with the so called love of her father's life. Maybe because she knew that Audrey was anything but.
As she headed out to the arrivals area, her suitcase clunking along behind her, Kim shaded her eyes from the sun that was streaming in through the floor length windows. It was quieter here than out back; she guessed a lot of people were still struggling their way through customs. She saw her father leaning against a column in the centre of the foyer. He was alone, but she'd expected that. Emily would have been at school, Audrey at work. Taking a deep breath, Kim raised her hand and shouted.
Jack looked up, a smile spreading across his face as his eldest daughter all but ran towards him. "Daddy!" she cried, her arms going round his neck. "I've missed you."
He breathed her in and held her tight. "I've missed you too, baby. How was your flight?"
"It was okay. Los Angeles was busy- sorry, you probably don't want to hear about LA." Kim pulled back and smiled brightly. "How about you carry my suitcase?"
"I knew there was a reason I was picking you up," Jack laughed, taking the case from Kim and leading her out towards the parking lot. "Emily wanted to come, too, but she's at school. She's so excited about seeing you."
"I thought she'd be in school. I can't wait to see her, either. And Audrey." Jack just smiled at that, nodding his head briefly.
The drive back was a long one; she'd forgotten how far away from the main city they lived. They talked about anything and everything, except, of course, Los Angeles. She got the feeling her father was keeping something from her but she didn't ask him to elaborate. He spoke far more about Emily than he did Audrey, but that wasn't a huge shock. They had been having problems the last time Kim had visited, about seven months ago.
"This weekend we thought we'd take you out, show you the city," Jack was saying. "Audrey wants to take you shopping."
"I'd love that," Kim murmured.
xxx
Amy was late. School had been out for fifteen minutes and there had been no sign of the little girl, who was normally eager to get home as soon as she could and park herself in front of the laptop. Chloe scowled. She was mad at Morris for swapping his day; she had had to leave work early and was more than a little apprehensive about who she was going to meet while she waited in the school yard. Dinner was likely to be ruined; she'd not had time to get any food in, and while she herself could quite happily go for days without eating properly, Amy was far more demanding. Chloe chewed at her nails, a habit she had recently picked back up, much to her own annoyance.
She purposely did not look around, keeping her eyes focussed straight ahead on the main doors. She had a good mind to go in and see what was taking Amy so long, when suddenly the doors burst open and two small children started running towards her.
"I'm sorry, Mommy!" Amy called, her hand clasped firmly around Emily's. Chloe started to smile, feeling herself relax, but drew her breath in sharply as the two girls neared. Emily was the spitting image of her mother, but her eyes were all Jack's. She beamed up at Chloe. "Hello, Mrs. O'Brian." Chloe murmured something in response, unable to take her eyes off the child. She was saying something about her Daddy being late, and how she and Amy had been waiting inside when they'd realised Chloe had been waiting for them. "So we're here," Amy finished off. "I thought we could wait for Emily's daddy?"
Chloe didn't want to do anything of the sort, but she couldn't leave the girl to wait on her own. "Yes, that's fine." She sat down on a nearby bench, the girls running wildly around her. "My sister's coming to visit today!" she heard Emily shriek. Kim, Chloe thought, relief washing over her at the thought that Jack had been able to work things out with his daughter. God knows he deserved it.
Just then, the girls stopped running, and Emily began waving at someone. "My Mommy's here," she announced, rushing away. "Stay there!" she called to Amy, who nodded seriously. Chloe felt sick; she got to her feet and tugged Amy to her. In the distance, she saw the unmistakable figure of Audrey Raines... Audrey Bauer, she corrected herself... walking smoothly into the school grounds. She looked just like Chloe remembered her. Emily scampered towards her; she saw them hug, and then Emily was tugging at Audrey's hand.
"Mommy, please will you come and meet Amy's mom?" Emily was insistent. Seeing an opportunity, Audrey no longer found herself in a rush to leave. She didn't know what she would say to Chloe, if that was in fact who this woman turned out to be, but she let Emily drag her across the yard regardless.
The woman held her daugher close, but it was obvious that the little girl wanted to play. "Mom," she moaned, twisting and pushing until Chloe released her. Audrey stopped short a few metres away. Chloe was... different, somehow, but also the same. Her hair was darker, longer, but she still wore the same style of clothes. Frumpy was the word Audrey wanted to use, but stopped short of saying it out loud. Chloe seemed far more relaxed than Audrey herself was, and happier. She even smiled when Audrey approached, a welcome change from the scowl she'd relied on in the past. "Audrey," she offered, meeting the taller woman's eye.
"Chloe. How are you?"
Amy and Emily stared at their mothers, wide eyed. "How do you know my mommy's name?" Amy enquired.
Audrey laughed. "She's just like you." To Amy, she said, "Your mom and I used to... work together." "Oh," Amy murmured, pondering this for a moment. "That makes sense."
"It's been a long time," Audrey continued.
"Yes, it has," Chloe agreed, fighting the urge to bite her lip, another habit she thought she'd forgotten.
The girls moved a little way away from their parents and began chatting eagerly amongst themselves. Audrey watched them for a moment, and saw that Chloe was doing the same. Stepping closer, and speaking so quietly that only Chloe could hear her, she said, "If you want what's best for your child then I suggest you stay away from my husband."
Chloe looked up sharply but Audrey was already walking away, holding out her hand for Emily and calling for her to hurry up. Amy rejoined her mother and waved madly after her friend. "Goodbye, Emily! Goodbye, Mrs Bauer." Audrey turned and smiled, although it didn't quite reach her eyes. It was done for Chloe's benefit; hearing the other woman's name spoken like that made her feel like she had been kicked in the stomach.
"I don't know what you're talking about," she called after her.
"I think you do, Chloe."
"But I don't..." She didn't bother shouting; Audrey had disappeared from view. Fighting back tears, she grabbed Amy's hand and walked quickly back to the car.
xxx
"Jack, I can't believe you're really doing this," Bill told him, reading quickly over the last few bits of paperwork that would finalise the other man's resignation from active Government duty. "However, I am happy for you and Audrey. How is she doing?"
"She's tired, the baby started kicking the other day, and she's suffering with morning sickness." Jack smiled. "But we're happy, Bill. I can't wait for this baby."
"I know you can't," the Director said sincerely. "She'll be one lucky baby, I know that. What this country loses, you and your family will gain, and that's why I'm going to sign this and let you get on with your life." Bill reached for a pen and quickly scribbled his signature at the bottom of several sheets of paper. He regarded Jack seriously. "I hope to never see you in here again."
Jack laughed, but there was a hint of sadness on his face. "I hope to never be here again."
The door to Bill's office opened just then. Both men looked up at the sight of Chloe O'Brian, dressed in a simple summer dress and clutching her two month old baby daughter to her chest. She faltered when she saw that she'd interrupted something, and turned to leave but Bill stopped her. "Please, come in." Scowling, she stepped awkwardly into the room and hovered just inside the door. "I wasn't going to come," she told them, "Morris wanted to bring her, only he had to go grocery shopping and I really needed to get out of the house because I was going mad just sitting in there all day, and he won't let me do anything so I asked him to drop me off here, as Nadia's been on at me to bring the baby in..." She trailed off, aware that she was babbling. "Anyway, this is Amy."
Bill smiled warmly. "It's so good to see you, Chloe," he said, kissing her cheek. He gazed at the baby, who blinked curiously back at him. "She's beautiful. Congratulations."
"Thanks."
Jack stood and walked across to her. "Hey," he said softly, reaching out and stroking the baby's cheek. "How are you, Chloe?"
"I'm good, well, tired but good. I heard about Audrey. Congratulations," she said quietly.
In the brief moment that her gaze locked with his, he knew. He loved her, and was now powerless to do anything about it.
"I want to tell you something," he began, looking to Bill for encouragement. The older man nodded, took a step back. Jack went on, "I'm leaving CTU. I'm leaving Los Angeles, to go and be with Audrey properly, in Washington."
Chloe hesitated before replying. She didn't tell him of her own plans to move to DC; it wasn't something he needed to know. They weren't likely to see each other again after this. She had been looking for a reason to leave LA, and Amy was it. She had been the one who'd suggested Washington, and Morris had agreed. She knew the city, knew it would be safe for Amy to grow up there. It was far enough away to allow her to forget Los Angeles, and big enough for her to forget Jack Bauer. Even if he and Audrey were there, the chances of seeing them were slim.
"Oh, well that's great news," she said finally. She turned to Bill. "I guess I'd better go and find Nadia. Goodbye, Mr. Buchanan."
"Goodbye, Chloe."
As the door swung shut behind her, Jack realised something else. It was the first time they had come close to a proper goodbye, and it hurt.
xxx
Kim left Jack and Emily playing in the lounge and walked into the kitchen, anxious to be of some use. "Let me help?" she asked Audrey, who was uncharacteristically slaving over the hot stove. Kim couldn't help but marvel at how the other woman kept up such an immaculate facade even when cooking. "Oh, thanks, Kim. Yes, could you lay the table for me please?"
"Sure." She found the placemats in the cupboard where they always were and stepped briefly into the adjoining dining room to set up the table. Moments later she returned to find Audrey... she never had been able to refer to her as her stepmother... slumped in a chair, tears pouring down her face. Immediately alarmed, Kim moved to go and get her father but Audrey held up her hand. "No, Kim. He doesn't need to see me like this."
"What's wrong?" she asked awkwardly, reluctant to offer comfort. "Are you sick?"
"No, no, nothing like that." The older woman wiped her eyes; Kim noticed the smudge of mascara on her cheek. "Please, don't worry about me. I'm just over emotional."
Kim gasped. "You're... you're pregnant?"
"Sometimes I wish I was," was all that she said, leaving Kim confused as the other woman hurried from the room, no doubt to repair her makeup.
Dinner was somewhat strained. Kim found herself opposite Audrey, the mascara back in place and the lipstick retouched. She knew her father had no idea about what had just happened, but she thought that it was probably quite a frequent occurrence. "This is lovely," she offered, at an attempt to start a conversation. Even Emily was unusually quiet.
"Thank you," Audrey murmured, her eyes fixed to her plate where she had barely touched her food.
"Is everything alright?" Jack asked, putting down his fork.
"Yes, why shouldn't it be?" Audrey snapped.
"Let me get dessert," Kim piped up. Emily jumped off her chair and raced to help her. "Kimmy, I met Amy's mom today!"
"Who's Amy?" Kim enquired, searching the refridgerator for icecream. Locating it, she pulled the tub out and began spooning scoops into the bowls that Emily had already laid out for her. "My best friend, silly. I met her mom today, she's really nice. Mommy seemed to know her, though. She said they used to work together. Is that right?"
"I don't know, sweetie. Mommy wouldn't lie about that." She paused. "Do you know her name, Amy's mom?"
Emily nodded enthusiastically. "Yes. Her name is Chloe."
She didn't let her shock show as Emily ran ahead of her and back into the dining room. It isn't the Chloe you're thinking of, she told herself. It must be someone else. Audrey has worked with a lot of people. Kim resumed her seat and stared thoughtfully at her icecream. She wouldn't tell her father. She was probably just over reacting. Satisfied, Kim began eating.
"Daddy, guess what happened today?" Before Jack had a chance to respond, Emily ploughed ahead. "Mommy met Amy's mommy, she said hi to her in the school yard."
Kim discreetly averted her eyes, instead focussing her attention on her sister as a decidedly frosty atmosphere settled over the table. "Did she?" Jack muttered, looking not at Emily but at Audrey, who refused to meet his gaze.
"Yes, she did, so now you have to meet her, too!" The little girl was oblivious to the tension between her parents. "She's really pretty, Daddy."
He smiled brightly. "I hope you were polite to her." Kim noticed that this last comment was not only directed at Emily; pushing back her plate, she said, "Shall we go and check out your new dolls house?" Emily beamed and turned to her mother for approval. Audrey nodded absently. "Sure, honey. Go with Kim."
No sooner were they out of the room than Jack rounded on her. "What have you done?"
"I haven't done anything, Jack," Audrey replied coolly, placing her fork at the side of her plate and reaching across for the girls'. She stood and made her way to the sink.
"It is Chloe, isn't it? What did you say to her?" He was bordering dangerously on losing his temper, and Audrey knew it. She hesitated before replying, "Nothing that didn't need to be said."
He sat back, stunned. His wife's revelation shocked him less than it should have, however the concept of perhaps seeing Chloe again left him breathless. Momentarily putting this to one side, he chose to address the more pressing issue that had been nagging at him for a while. "Audrey, I don't know what you think is going on between me and Chloe, but I assure you it isn't."
"Isn't it?"
"I haven't seen Chloe in five years."
"Then why-"
"This isn't really about that, is it?" He lowered his voice. "Things haven't been right between us for a while now."
"You had noticed then?"
Jack sighed. "I think we need some time apart." He was surprised to see her nodding. "I think we need a divorce," she muttered. On seeing his shocked expression, she almost laughed. "Come on, Jack. Like you said, we haven't been right for some time. It's only just getting worse. I think it would be better for everyone if you move out." There was a note of finality in her tone, and despite the relief washing over him, Jack felt tears sting his eyes. "Just like that? What about Emily? She's my baby, too. You can't take her away from me, Audrey."
"I don't intend to, but I can't have you around me any longer, Jack. It isn't good for me or you, or Emily. She's not stupid. She knows something is wrong. I think you should go back to the hotel with Kim for tonight."
He didn't want to argue with her, not now. Not ever again. He clenched his teeth. "Fine. I'll go with Kim." And with that he walked quickly from the room.
His eldest daughter didn't question him when he asked her to give he and Emily some privacy. The little girl was ensconced in her dolls house but looked up when she felt Jack's arms around her. "Daddy!" she squealed. "Have you come to play?"
Jack shook his head. "No, sweetheart," he whispered hoarsely, gathering her into his lap. "Daddy's got to go away for a bit."
"Like Amy's daddy?" Emily frowned.
"What do you mean?"
"Amy said her daddy doesn't live with her any more, because her parents don't love each other any more. Is that why you're going, Daddy? Don't you and Mommy love each other any more?"
He felt a lump start building in his throat as he stared into his daughter's innocent blue eyes. "You're so clever," he told her. "No, baby, we don't, but we still love you. So much," he added, holding her closer. "Will I still see you, Daddy?" Her voice was muffled by his shirt, but he heard her.
"Of course you will. I'll get a new house and you can come visit, yeah?"
Emily thought this over. "Okay. Can I go back and play now?" Jack set her back on the ground and she soon lost herself once more in the dolls house. Kim appeared in the doorway, her purse in her hand. "Are you ready to go, Daddy?"
He got to his feet, closing the door quietly behind him. He didn't reply, merely followed her wordlessly down the stairs, and out into the waiting cab. Audrey waited in the lounge until they had gone, before going about her normal nightly routine of tidying and locking up the house. She wanted to cry but couldn't; her earlier tears had been borne out of frustration. All she felt now was relief.
xxx
"Mommy?"
It was well past midnight, but Chloe didn't have the energy to argue, or to ask Amy why she wasn't asleep. Wearily, she patted the empty space beside her. "Come in," she yawned, putting down her book. It was the third night in a row that she had suffered from a sudden bout of insomnia; the book was just making her worse and she knew it. Try as she might she couldn't take her mind off what had happened in the school yard, what Audrey had said to her. A few weeks had passed and Morris had resumed his Wednesday routine, so she didn't have to worry about seeing the other woman so much but it was always there, at the back of her mind, a nagging voice that had her comparing herself with Audrey. She'd thought this voice silenced, but evidently it wasn't to be.
Amy curled up beside her, her eyes wide. "Something bad happened, Mommy," she whispered. "Emily's sad."
"Why is she sad, baby?"
The little girl frowned. "Promise you won't say?"
"I promise."
She sighed. "Emily said her Daddy doesn't live with her any more. She said that he and her mommy are like you and Daddy; they don't love each other any more but they still love her. That's sad, isn't it, Mommy?"
Chloe swallowed. "Yes, it is." She blinked several times, annoyed at the moisture forming behind her eyes. "You want to stay in here tonight, Amy?"
"Yes, please." Her daughter was just as upset as she about the news, although for different reasons. Or maybe not, Chloe thought, as Amy wriggled beside her in an attempt to get comfortable. She doesn't like seeing her friend upset, and neither do I. But she and Jack weren't friends, not now, not ever, perhaps. Amy started saying something else and Chloe forced herself to listen.
"Emily said her daddy is sad, too," Amy said, her voice now heavy with sleep. "She said he... he always looks so sad, like he's missing someone. Do you think he's lonely, mommy?"
"I don't know," she managed to reply, a stray tear sliding down her face. Her heart ached for him; five years had done nothing to change how she felt, she had been a fool to think it would. Amy's breathing evened out; Chloe tucked the blankets tighter around her, holding her close. "I'm so sorry, Jack," she murmured, her tears now flowing freely. "I'm so sorry."
The next morning she awoke to find that Amy had attempted to make her breakfast in bed. She tried not to think about the state of the kitchen as she took her orange juice and muesli from the precariously balanced tray. "What's this for?" she asked. "You want something, don't you?"
Amy giggled. "Well, I was kind of hoping we could go shopping today. Please, Mommy?" Her eyes betrayed her though; there was something else. After a few moments of fidgeting she asked, "Mommy, who is Jack?"
She almost choked. "W-what, honey?"
"I said, who is Jack?" Amy edged closer. "Last night I heard you say the name Jack. I just wondered who he was, that's all." She shrugged. "It doesn't matter, though."
"Jack was my friend," Chloe replied, hoping she sounded stronger than she felt. She took a deep breath. "Remember Daddy and me used to live somewhere else, before here?" Amy nodded eagerly. "Well, we knew Jack. He lived there, too. He was a good man."
"You miss him."
"Yes, I do."
"Do you love him?"
Chloe was astounded by Amy's bluntness, her ability to get straight to the point. Trying to smile, she told her, "It's a little bit more complicated than that. When you love someone, you can't always be with them."
"Why not?"
"Because sometimes things happen that we can't control."
"That sucks."
"Yes, it does."
Amy scowled. "I never ever want to be in love, ever." She jumped off the bed, suddenly bored by the whole conversation. "I'm going to go get ready now," she announced, clattering out of the room and into her own. She was back a few moments later, another question written all over her face. "Did I ever meet him? Jack, I mean?"
Chloe smiled, remembering. It had been the last time she'd seen him; she wasn't likely to ever forget that. "Yes. When you were a tiny baby. He smoothed your cheek," she went on, her hand flying to her mouth as Amy reached up and touched the exact spot his fingers had traced all those years ago. "Right here?" she asked, not seeing her mother hastily wipe her eyes. "I think I like him," she went on, skipping out of the room once more.
xxx
Kim paused just outside the door, her heart already sinking as she thought about what she might find on the other side. This had happened once before, and that was when her mother had died. Although, back then, she hadn't been there to help him through. She vowed that this time would be different, which is why she visited him every day in his new apartment. She made him eat, made him open the curtains, made him do normal, boring, every day tasks. She was confused, though. She knew he wasn't missing Audrey; Kim had worked that out pretty quickly by the ease with which he contacted his lawyer about the divorce proceedings. It wasn't Emily, either. He and Audrey had worked out a twice weekly rota where he could see her for a few hours and make her dinner. All three of them seemed happy with that. Kim was amazed at how her sister had accepted the whole situation. It couldn't have been easy for her, but she'd adapted.
She knew he was lonely. He didn't deserve to be, not after everything that had happened to him, but there he was, putting on a face for the world when inside he was torn apart. Kim saw it in the rare moments that he let his guard down, usually first thing in the morning or last thing at night. Sometimes she would catch him staring off into space, but she never questioned him about it.
She heard him moving about in the lounge as she unlocked the front door. He hadn't wanted her to have a spare key. She had extended her holiday indefinitely from work but realistically couldn't carry on doing so. It was only a matter of time before they fired her. Which is why she'd been out looking at properties in Washington. Jack didn't know; she figured he had enough to worry about without adding that to the mixture.
"I'm home," she called out, shutting the door behind her and eyeing the small hallway with trepidation. She was pleased to see that the windows were open, and the laundry was draped over the radiators. "Hey," he called back. Minutes later he joined her in the kitchen, helping her to unload her shopping bags. "Did you have a good time?" he asked.
"It was okay."
"You know, you don't have to do this, Kim. I'm not going to do anything stupid." He tried to smile. "Please, sweetheart, I can't keep asking you to put your life on hold for me."
Kim shrugged. "You're not asking. I'm offering."
"I'm not going to win this one, am I?"
"No."
They worked in silence until the bags were empty and the cupboards full. Kim poured herself a glass of water and walked into the lounge, all but collapsing onto the couch. Jack sat down opposite her, his eyes on the TV but his mind elsewhere, as it usually was.
"I've just seen her, Daddy," Kim started, needing to talk, to fill the void.
Jack smiled tiredly. "Seen who, baby?"
"Chloe. When I was out shopping. And she's okay. She looks happy." Kim eyed her father carefully, watching for a reaction. She guessed he'd been thinking about Chloe. While Audrey had been wrong about her being the source of their problems, Kim wanted to ease his mind. Maybe then he would stop feeling guilty about how things had been left between them.
"That's good," he murmured absently, his face revealing nothing. Kim cursed herself; she should have known better than to presume to read his moods. She'd pushed him away for too long to be allowed that privilege. His next words however shocked her. "Was she with Morris?"
"No, she was on her own, with... Amy, isn't it?" She frowned. "Is Morris her husband?"
Jack just stared at her, and she was alarmed by the dejected look on his face. "She's happy," he repeated. "That's all I ever wanted for her."
"Daddy, what's wrong?"
"Nothing-"
"Daddy, I know I've not been there for you in the past, and I am sorry. I want to make it up to you but I need you to help me." She bit back her tears and laid a hand on his arm. "Daddy, please." She didn't need to refer to their past; this time she could see in his eyes that he was remembering it all too vividly. He turned to her and took her hand. "I miss your mother so much, you know that?"
"I know. I miss her, too."
Jack took a deep breath, as though deciding whether or not to continue. Kim saw his defences spring back up and she squeezed his hand. "It's okay," she whispered. He managed a weak smile. "To start with, when I was with Audrey, everything was fine." He frowned, disliking the words as soon as they left his lips but somehow unable to take them back. "But we changed. Both of us. I'm just as much to blame as she is."
"That's why you're getting a divorce." Kim didn't bother to phrase it as a question; she was relieved that her father had finally come to the same conclusion that she herself had arrived at several years previous.
"Yes."
"What about Emily?" she asked gently.
"She's happy with Audrey. I'm not going to fight her," he added. "I almost lost you, Kim. If I fight Audrey for custody I could lose Emily, too. This way I get to see her."
"And me." Kim gripped his hand tighter. "I'm not going anywhere, Daddy. I want to move to DC to be closer to you." Jack started to protest but Kim silenced him by holding up a hand. "You shouldn't be alone, Daddy. No one should be."
xxx
The phone rang shrilly, cutting through the silence of the study. Audrey snatched it up, used to the interruption. "Hello?" she greeted, one hand still writing down figures for the next day's report. She was working from home- a rare but much needed luxury. The voice on the end of the phone hesitated. "Is that Mrs. Bauer?"
"Ms. Heller," Audrey automatically corrected, still not looking up from her work.
"Ah, yes. Sorry, Ms. Heller. This is St. Joseph's Elementary School. There's been an accident. Please don't worry; Emily is fine but we do need you to get here as soon as you can."
Audrey dropped her pen and got to her feet. "I'm on my way," she told them, not giving them a chance to ring off before slamming the phone down and rushing out to the car.
Fifteen minutes later she was running as fast as she could through the school yard, trying not to panic as she saw an ambulance parked outside the main doors and the crowd of students and teachers milling around it. She pushed her way through the crowd, anxious to get to her daughter. Someone caught her arm and she stopped. "Ms. Heller?" they enquired.
"Yes." Audrey glanced around frantically. "Will someone please tell me what's going on?"
The woman took her to one side. "There was an accident. Emily is fine, just a few bumps."
"What sort of accident?"
"Emily and her friend were playing in the play area." She indicated to the small, grassy section at the end of the school yard where a small slide and a climbing frame were held. Audrey paled as she noticed how it was fenced off, a solemn faced man who she took to be a custodian standing guard. "Both girls fell from the frame, however Emily was able to run back and call for help."
Audrey felt a mixture of relief and anger surge over her simultaneously. "Weren't they being supervised?"
"Yes, ma'am, of course they were." The teacher was indignant. "It's a sad accident, one we wish hadn't happened and one that we will endeavour to prevent from happening again." She softened her voice. "Would you like me to take you to Emily?" Audrey nodded and allowed herself to be led indoors, wincing as the ambulance sirens started to wail, signalling its departure. "The other girl... is she okay?"
"I'm afraid it's too early to tell." The other woman was suddenly sombre. "I can't really talk about it, I'm sorry."
"My God..." Audrey murmured, her stomach knotting at the thought of what could have happened; it could just as easily have been Emily in the ambulance and the realisation hit her hard. As she was shown into the school's small medical area, she immediately located her daughter and ran towards her, smothering her with kisses. "I'm so glad you're okay," she whispered, determined not to show her emotions in front of her ever present chaperone.
Emily wriggled out of her grasp. "I'm fine," she hissed, embarrassed. "I just want to go home."
Audrey couldn't help but laugh. "Then that's where we're going, honey. Are you okay to walk?"
She helped her daughter out of the makeshift bed and onto the floor, where she slipped her feet into her tiny pink shoes. Murmuring a word of thanks to the other woman, Audrey walked slowly out of the room, gripping tightly onto Emily's hand. In the yard, the crowd had dispersed, leaving only a handful of concerned looking parents who had come to collect their children early. "The car's right here," Audrey said, pointing. "We'll get you some candy on the way home, shall we?"
"Yes, please." Emily was quiet as her mother helped her into the passenger seat and then climbed in behind the wheel. Audrey stole worrying glances in her direction every so often but chose not to press her. "I'll call Daddy as soon as we get home," she said, not relishing the idea. "We need to tell him you're okay."
Emily perked up at this. "Can I call him, Mommy? Please?"
"Okay, honey," Audrey replied, more than a little relieved at not having to do it herself. She felt a pang of selfishness but quickly pushed it to the back of her mind.
xxx
Jack picked up after the third ring, his daughter's voice on the end of the line enough to put his senses on high alert. "Hi, baby," he greeted, "why aren't you in school?" He stood and began pacing, trying to keep his tone light.
"Daddy, I fell off the climbing frame and bumped my knee," Emily told him matter of factly, as though he was stupid to be asking such a question. There was a pause. "Daddy, something else happened too. Amy fell off and she wouldn't get up, she looked like she was asleep but I couldn't wake her. I had to go and get help. Daddy?"
"I-I'm here," he reassured her, patting his pockets for his car keys.
"But I'm fine, though." She giggled. "Mommy bought me some candy. Amy will wake up soon, won't she?" Despite her innocence, she sensed the seriousness of the situation. "She was all on her own, Daddy. Her mom wasn't there or anything."
Trying not to alarm his daughter, Jack injected a note of hope into his voice. "Amy will be awake soon, baby. She just hit her head, which made her all sleepy." He wondered why the school hadn't contacted Chloe... or perhaps they didn't have time to wait for her to arrive. "You go and rest, okay, and I'll see you at the weekend."
"Okay, Daddy. I love you."
"I love you too, so much," he whispered.
Once she had gone he stopped pacing, his mind running over the worst case scenario. No doubt Audrey had already questioned the safety of the play area; bringing it up again would just waste more time. He thought briefly about phoning the school and enquiring as to where Amy had been taken, but they were unlikely to tell him. He was already out the door and running for the car before an idea had properly formulated in his mind. A little girl was unconscious, scared and all alone, and all he knew was that he needed to get to her.
It didn't take long to find out which hospital she had been taken to. Jack phoned the three closest he could think of, the last one providing him with the information he needed. "Are you Mr. O'Brian?" the receptionist asked. Jack considered lying but then thought better of it. "No, I'm a friend of the family."
"I'm afraid I can't tell you anything," she continued. "Close family only."
"Can you not at least tell me which unit she's in?" His voice cracked and he silently cursed himself for showing weakness. The woman on the phone detected this and softened her tone. "I'm sorry, Mr...?" But Jack had already hung up. Slamming his foot down on the gas, he took a sharp right into the hospital parking lot, narrowly avoiding the path of an oncoming vehicle.
Inside the main reception area, Jack came to a halt. He glanced wildly around at the doctors and patients, the noise suddenly oppressive. A sign by the elevator told him that intensive care was on the third floor; he ran towards it, jabbing impatiently at the button on the wall.
"I'm sorry, sir, but you can't use that elevator, it's for staff only-" The doors slid open and Jack stepped inside, pressing down hard on the 'doors close' button. The man's voice was cut off as the doors slammed to, leaving Jack alone with his thoughts.
xxx
She had six missed calls, and a frantic voice mail message asking her to please ring the school as soon as possible. Lip between her teeth, Chloe redialled the last number and waited while she was put on hold. "Can't have been that urgent," she muttered to no one in particular, attracting a curious stare from the woman at the desk next to her. Chloe scowled and she soon looked away. The meeting had overrun by an hour and a half; she was already cranky, hungry and in need of coffee. She was about to give up and go in search of the latter when at last a voice sounded from the other end of the phone.
"Hello, this is Chloe O'Brian, you called me about six times today?"
"Ah yes, thank God you've called. You need to get to Ashwood County Hospital, there's been an accident-"
The phone slipped from Chloe's grasp. "Amy..." she breathed, stumbling away from her desk, only just remembering to pick up her purse. It seemed to take an age to get down to the parking lot but then she was in the car, driving faster than she thought possible. "Mommy's coming baby, please hold on. Please be okay..." She swiped angrily at her tears. What the school must think of me. I'm such a bad mother.
She was pulled out of her thoughts as she ran through a red light, several surrounding vehicles beeping and swerving to get out of her way. Chloe didn't see this, could only focus on the tall, red bricked building of Ashwood County Hospital as it loomed in front of her.
"Can someone please help me?" she cried, running in through the main doors five minutes later. A few people looked up but carried on as normal, the sight of a woman half crazed with fear and worry not such an unusual sight. Chloe could feel tears sliding down her cheeks. Every second away from Amy was time she was losing with her daughter. "Someone, please?"
"Ma'am, what seems to be the problem?" A young doctor appeared at her side, evidently concerned. Chloe turned to face him. "I'm Chloe O'Brian, my daughter Amy was brought in this afternoon. Please take me to her!"
He pointed towards the elevator. "She's in ICU. Come on, I'll take you." He hesitantly took her arm and helped her towards the elevator. "She's critical but stable, Mrs. O'Brian. I'm not her physician but as far as I know she took a nasty hit to the head."
Chloe paled. She found it suddenly difficult to breathe. She could only nod, her heart pounding rapidly in her chest as the elevator rose. Once on the third floor, the doctor pointed to a room just down the hall. "I'm needed downstairs, but she's in there. Ask for Doctor Evans," he advised, stepping back into the elevator and closing the door. Chloe took a moment to wipe her eyes once more, before walking quickly in the direction the young man had pointed.
"Can I help you?"
Chloe whirled. "I'm Amy's mom. Are you Doctor Evans?"
"Yes, I am." He nodded to the room outside which they were standing. "Before we go in, Mrs. O'Brian, I want to warn you. She's got a particularly nasty bump to the head, and a machine is monitoring her heart. We were concerned that you didn't get here sooner," he said, his tone light but his eyes accusing. Chloe met his gaze defiantly. "I was at work. No one took a message. I don't even know what the hell has happened here." Anger helped her to think, to take her mind off of the what ifs. The doctor studied her face for a moment before replying. "As far as we know from what the school told us, Amy and her friend were playing on some play equipment in the school yard, when they fell. Amy's friend was able to call for help. We believe that Amy has hit her head on the ground rather than the metal play equipment, which is something to be thankful for, Mrs. O'Brian. This could be a lot worse. She was fitting earlier but there is no internal bleeding. We're confident that she will wake up, however it is early days yet. She'll have severe concussion, and will be very confused."
Chloe closed her eyes. "Thank God," she muttered, sinking down into the chair next to her. "And thank you, Doctor Evans."
The doctor smiled, rethinking his earlier assessment of the woman now sat in front of him. "You can go in if you like."
"Yes, I would like that." She stood followed him towards the door. "There are nurses just down the hall there, and I'm not far away," he assured her. Chloe smiled gratefully up at him, waiting until he walked away and then stepping into her daughter's room.
The only noise was the hum of the heart monitor. The room was big, painted pale blue and decorated simply. She assumed it was meant to be calming.
"Hey, baby," she whispered, dropping down into the chair beside the bed and taking Amy's tiny hand in her own. "I'm so sorry you had to stay in the big horrible hospital on your own. Mommy didn't mean to be so long." She pushed a strand of hair from Amy's eyes, wincing as she saw the bruise already forming on her daughter's forehead. "You're safe now, though. The doctors are going to make you better and then you can come home and we can be a family again." Chloe fleetingly thought of phoning Morris, but remembered that he was on vacation, visiting his parents in London. There was no point in worrying him when he was unable to do anything to help.
Out in the hall, she heard raised voices. "... that guy... someone needs to tell him she's here... three hours..." The door creaked open and a nurse poked her head around it. She smiled briefly at Chloe before vanishing. Chloe shrugged, returning her attention to Amy.
xxx
"Mr. Bauer?"
Jack and Kim looked up. Kim squeezed her father's hand. "It's okay, Daddy," she murmured. The nurse smiled. "It's nothing to worry about. I just thought you should know that Mrs. O'Brian has arrived; she's in there with Amy right now."
Jack found himself at a loss for words. Kim thanked the nurse and then gently removed her hand from Jack's. "Go in there, Daddy."
He shook his head. "I needed to keep her safe, that's all. Chloe's here now, we can go."
"No, Daddy. Chloe needs you. Go. I'll be fine out here." Kim stood. "I'm going to go get a coffee. If you're still sat here when I come back I will go in there and tell Chloe myself." She stared at him pointedly until he got to his feet. His hand was shaking as he placed it on the door handle. "Go on," Kim encouraged. He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "I can't think where you get your stubborness from," he mused. Kim laughed, knowing he would be okay. "I'll be back soon."
He closed the door quietly behind him, blinking to adjust his eyes to the dull glow of the room. There was a soft humming sound; looking up, he saw a heart monitor to the right of the bed. To the left, he saw Chloe, her hand clasping Amy's. The little girl was breathing steadily, but he could see the bruise even from where he stood. Chloe was murmuring something about going home and letting Amy play on her laptop. Jack had to smile at that; it was a comfort to know she hadn't changed.
"We'll have to tell Daddy, too, when he gets back from London," she continued. "He'll make such a fuss of you."
Jack stepped closer, still unsure as to what he was supposed to be saying at this point. He was still close enough to the door; she didn't ever need to know that he'd been there.
But then something changed. She stopped talking to Amy. A calm settled around her and she sat back in the chair. She felt... safe. A comforting, soothing, strong presence had filled the stark room, and she sank into it.
"You're here, aren't you?" Her voice was clear; he knew she was talking to him. "It has to be you."
"It's me," he whispered, feeling a rush of emotion.
"You stayed with her." Slowly, she got to her feet so that she could face him. He could only nod as he took in the long, dark hair that fell down her back, the perfect line of her mouth, the deep sadness in her eyes. Unhurried, she moved until she was directly in front of him. She took one of his hands in her own. "I know these hands," she murmured. "They're caring hands, brave hands." She looked into his eyes. "Thank you. For keeping my baby safe."
"It's okay," was all he could think of to say. He tried answering her with his eyes, and she nodded. "I'm glad that Emily is okay. She's really very beautiful."
He smiled. "Thank you. So is Amy. She looks like you," he added, stepping over to the bed and gazing down at the child. Amy's eyes flickered. "I think she's waking up." Chloe stepped up beside him and peered anxiously at her daughter. Several minutes passed, and then Amy opened her eyes fully. "Mommy, my head hurts," she groaned, trying to sit up. Chloe placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I should think it does, baby. You fell off the climbing frame at school. And don't even think about getting out of this bed until the doctor says so." She put on what she hoped was her sternest expression, and Amy rolled her eyes. "Fine."
Jack laughed softly, walking away so as to give them some privacy. "You're Jack," Amy called, causing him to stop in his tracks.
"Yes," he replied, frowning. "How do you know?"
Amy yawned. "My Mommy talks about you. She loves you, you know. But don't tell her I told you."
Chloe flushed scarlet. Jack tried to say something but couldn't; they were interrupted at that point by Doctor Evans. He turned and slipped quietly back out into the hallway, his mind reeling.
xxx
Chloe swallowed, her breathing ragged. She couldn't remember feeling so nervous. Opposite her, Jack smiled kindly. "It's okay," he said, and she started to think that maybe, just maybe, it was.
They were at his apartment. Amy had been allowed out of hospital two days ago; Kim was watching both her and Emily back at the house. "It's so nice to see you again, Chloe," she'd greeted, her tone sincere. "I'll take good care of Amy, I promise."
"I know you will," Chloe had replied, and she did. Kim was Jack's daughter in more than just name.
"I'm sorry about you and Audrey," she said now, sipping her orange juice. She saw how calm he seemed about the situation. The apartment was clean, although she suspected Kim had had a role to play in that. "Morris and I, we broke up too- sorry, you don't want to hear about that."
"I do," he insisted. "I missed you, Chloe. All this time, we were both in the same city and we never knew."
She shrugged. "You were so happy with Audrey. I already had plans to move to Washington, I figured it didn't matter any more."
"Figured what didn't matter?"
"This... I wanted you to move on with your life so I could move on with mine. Los Angeles was a bad place for both of us, Jack."
His face darkened. "And you thought that forgetting each other was the way to solve that?" He put down his fork, no longer hungry. "I never forgot you, Chloe. Never." Jack took a breath. "It worked though, that plan of yours. I was thinking you were a part of my old life in LA, a life I couldn't live any longer. I thought I'd lost you to it, too." The anger in his voice scared her. "Jack, don't. It's been five years. LA is in the past. Neither of us can go back. I wanted you to be happy."
"I was happy," he admitted. "Really happy. But I think you knew that Audrey and I weren't going to last." He looked at her sadly. "We were holding onto something that wasn't working any more, both too scared to let go." Chloe didn't know if he was referring to his marriage to Audrey, or the similarities it held with her own failed relationship with Morris. Jack pushed back his chair. She knew better than to ask him where he was going, and so was astounded when he held out his hand to her.
He walked her from the room and into the lounge. "Sit with me?" he asked, suddenly vulnerable. Chloe obliged, and they sat in silence until the lights faded outside and the apartment was plunged into early evening darkness.
"I know you hate me," Chloe said finally. "If we don't see each other again after this, I just want you to know that I didn't want to hurt you. You're the last person I would want to hurt. What Amy said was true, Jack. I do love you. I think I always have, it's just taken me this long to figure it out in my own head and to work up the courage to tell you. I guess I thought I'd never get the chance to tell you. I was so scared when Amy told me she'd met Emily. I knew right away she was your daughter."
"I knew Amy was yours too," he told her. Even in the near dark Chloe could see the sheen in his eyes. "I tried to tell myself that it wasn't you, that Morris had moved here and met someone else, but I was just trying to kid myself. I didn't want to believe that I'd been given another chance. I thought I'd used them all up; I sure as hell don't deserve another chance."
"Maybe we do, Jack." Daringly, she took his hand in hers. "Let's say this isn't another chance. This is a new chance." She frowned. "Plus, I'd really like for us to be friends."
"So would I." He locked his eyes with hers. The bond was still there. Rather than weakened by time it had only become stronger. "Chloe..."
She shook her head. "You don't have to, Jack. It's alright."
"I love you."
Chloe gasped, blinked back tears. She didn't resist as he gently pulled her closer, wrapping his arms tight around her waist. "Audrey and I are still technically married, but it will be finalised soon," he said, his voice muffled by her hair. "I'd like you to be part of my life, Chloe. I don't want it to be five years until we see each other again."
She didn't think she could walk away from him, and she knew she couldn't let him walk away from her. "I'm not going anywhere, not this time. Last time I tried to leave you we ended up right back in the same city. So you see, I can't leave you." She frowned. "Does that make sense?"
"Perfect sense."
Chloe nodded. "Right. Then I guess what I'm saying is yes, I'll be part of your life. Five years is too long."
"Too long," he murmured in agreement. He kissed her forehead. "Come on, let's go tell the girls the good news. After all, it is down to them that we found each other again."
She shook her head, smiling. "I don't think we ever lost each other."