All Of This

chap. 1

A/N: Okay, yeah I have no business writing another story lol....I know. But hey, the thoughts were flowin'. I kinda needed to step away from what's going on with GH right now and make a Jaudia fic off something that isn't going on or a rewrite. So yeah....this is it. I hope you guys like itXD O_o and 'The Knock at the Door' is going on Hiatus for a while. And 'Fate Takes Over' I'm not sure if I want to fully explore it or not. So right now I'm just going to focus on this story. I have every intention on fully exploring this one! So yeah, tell me what ya guys think!!!! Comments=love;)

Disclaimer-I own nothing. smart one Einstein...

Jason Morgan had always been an honest man. He always did what he felt was right. He never wondered 'what if'' or 'what might have been'. But tonight, and like the last eight months of his life what if and what might have been is all he could think about. He was doing all the things he knew were wrong, especially for the woman he'd committed his life to and the woman he'd given his heart to.

Jason lay in bed staring up at the ceiling, reflecting on all the events that had occured earlier that day. He had taken his family to the park. He'd watched Jake and Cameron's faces light up a dozen times. Elizabeth had looked as happy as she'd ever been. And for a moment, he felt that same happiness because making them happy was all he'd ever wanted. But then he saw her. He saw that look in her eyes when she'd seen them. That look shattered his heart into a million pieces. He knew he'd hurt her and that was the last thing he'd ever wanted to do. Seeing her killed him because he couldn't be with her. Instead, he had to act like she didn't exist and that he hated her.

Jason started to feel an aching feeling in his stomach. It was a feeling he knew all to well and felt a little too often. It was the feeling he got whenever he was away from her for too long.

Jason looked over to his right. Elizabeth was sleeping so soundly and so securely. He'd felt so bad for doing this behind her back but he couldn't stop. Or maybe it was he just didn't want to. Well, whatever it was, he needed her. He was like an addict and she was his drug.

(With all of this I know now

Everything inside of my head

It all just goes to show how

Nothing I know changes me at all

Again I wait for this to change instead

To tear the world in two

Another night with her

But I'm always wanting you.

-Blink-182 ft the Cure)

Jason slowly rose from the bed and dug his cell phone from out of his pants pocket. After capturing it he scooped up his clothes and shuffled to the door. He took one last glance at Liz. God he was sorry...but the heart wants what the heart wants. Love is an emotion you just can't choose. You don't choose it, it chooses you. And it chose him.

Jason closed the door behind him and made his way to the hall bathroom. Within seconds he was fully clothed and outside about to hop on his motorcycle. He sighed as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. He knew he shouldn't call her. She had a life and he shouldn't keep interrupting it just because he made the wrong decision. But he needed her, he missed her. He needed to erase the look of pain in her eyes from his mind. He needed to make things right. Jason flipped open his phone and dialed her number.

Claudia lay in bed with her arms resting behind her head. She had had a long day. Most of it had been filled with work. But the other portion had been filled with pain and heart ache. The pain he put there. She had saw him with his family; with her. God she hated him! She hated him for making her feel. The only person she'd vowed she'd ever feel for was her brother Johnny. She knew that love was out of the question for her. But that man....he changed that. And for that she hated him. For every emotion he'd put in her. That man had conjured up emotions she didn't even know she had! She wanted him more than she'd ever wanted any man. And that scared the hell out of her.

Claudia sighed in frustration and buried her face in her hands. She had to get him out of her head. He was clouding her judgement and that was bad for business. The man she really needed to be worrying about was the one lying next to her, Ric Lansing. She needed him to please her father. And being with him did just that. Ric needed her as well. She was his key into the kingdom. They were allies not lovers. But that still didn't stop Ric from wanting more. And that was just something she couldn't give him. She'd already given him her body. But her heart? How could she give him something that she didn't even have? That was property of Jason Morgan.

Ric's voice brought her out of her thoughts. " Hey, you okay?" Ric asked wearily.

Claudia shook her head out of her thoughts. " Y-yeah. I'm fine."

" You sure?" he asked, running his hand through her thick black hair.

Claudia caught his hand. " Yes. I'm sure. Stop worrying about me and get some sleep." she said and placed a reassuring kiss on lips.

In response he smiled and flopped his head back down on his pillow, accepting her answer.

When she finally heard him snoring she sighed with relief and reached down on the side of the bed and dug her phone out out her purse. It had been vibrating out of control.

Four missed calls from Jason. Dammit! she sighed and took a glance over at Ric. After finding he was still asleep she tiptoed to the patio and dialed Jason's number.

" Hey, you busy?"

No Jason. It's only three-a-damn clock in the morning. Of course any normal person would be sleeping. But hell, who was she kidding? She was anything but.

" No, what's up?"

" I wanna see you."

Claudia rolled her eyes into space. Everything in her wanted to scream 'go to hell' and hang up. But there was one vital organ that protested.

She took another look back at Ric through the doors. " OK."

(Use me Holly come on and use me

We know where we go

Use me Holly come on and use me

We go where we know)

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TBC....