{/Author's Note: shameless TornxAshelin sap, probably OOC at some points. Mild spoilers. Personal liberties taken: Torn's voice problem. Song is Jade from Sweetbox - 1000 Words. Anyoo, enjoy. Typical disclaimers apply, blah blah blah... moving on to the story!/}
~=~On Silver Wings~=~
"*TORN!*"
Ashelin practically shrieked as she broke away from the Metal Head she was fighting, turning to her friend. The commander was on his hands and knees, choking, one hand pressed to his throat and eyes wide with a terror he was not accustomed to. A clawed Metal Head roared its victory in a shrill cry near him, holding its bloody pincer in the air.
The woman paid no heed to the Metal Heads she came across on her way. Furious and frightened, she took each one down, all the while screaming her friend's name.
She fired on the one that had struck him. She fired again and again and again until she was sure that twisted body would not rise again. Then, she turned to him.
Torn's mouth was moving without words, and blood was dripping around his fingers and over his lips. The thing had pierced his throat... he wasn't breathing properly... Ashelin started to panic, fumbling in her sachel for a health pack, anything to help the commander of the Krimzon Guard that she had come to respect so much.
"Torn, don't die... please... stay with me, Torn, look at me! Oh, god, your throat... oh, by the Precursors, Torn..."
Those icy eyes turned to her, focused on her through the pain and the fear, and he choked out a harsh whisper. "Ashelin... I'm okay..."
////I know that you're hiding things,////
////Using gentle words to shelter me.////
She shook her head quickly, coaxing him to lay down on his side. "No, no, you're not." She gently pried his fingers away from his throat, and the damage came fully into view. Ashelin's stomach heaved, but quickly, she pressed a clean cloth over the woud. "Torn, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention... I..."
His head shook slowly, his eyes never leaving her face. She tried to assess the damage mentally, rushing with what she did, but trying to be as careful as she could. What if he couldn't speak? He'd had such a soft voice when she'd met him. She liked his voice, really. Torn was the sort of person she enjoyed being around... unlike that presumptuous fool Erol.
Torn slowly started to calm down from his earlier panic, Ashelin's help allowing him to breathe somewhat. Ashelin leaned down close, brushing his dreads away from his face carefully. "Don't you dare give up, Commander Torn. I'll never forgive you if you do."
"Ashelin..." said he, his voice coming out as a rocky whisper. "There's... not enough... Pre--... Precursor Orbs in the world... to make me give up... with you here..."
////Your words were like a dream,////
////But dreams could never fool me...////
Those words made her blink, and she swore her heart wasn't working for a moment. Furiously, she rubbed away tears that formed in her sharp green eyes, and without thinking, she leant down and kissed him. While at first he seemed shocked, the commander softened into it a bit, and when she pulled back, he was watching her carefully. She smiled at him, ignoring the coppery taste of his blood that lingered on her lips. "I'll get you help. I refuse to let you die out here."
Torn just barely smiled before he found he could keep his eyes open no longer, and his vision faded into darkness.
*****
////Not that easily.////
When Torn awoke next, he was laying in a hospital bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt the itch of stitches in his throat, scratchy bandages overlaying. That was worse than the pain. He tried to speak, but nothing came out, and he started to panic all over again. Had that Metal Head destroyed his voice?
"Shh, Torn, it's okay. The doctor says it'll be a few days before your voice comes back... although there may be some damage to it."
The voice belonged to Ashelin, and Torn blinked in surprise as he looked towards her. He hadn't expected her to be at the hospital, waiting for him to wake up. He had, after all, simply dreamed that whole kiss... hadn't he?
Closing his eyes with what passed as a groan, he sunk further into the pillow. Ashelin laughed and grabbed his hand, lacing her fingers with his. "Don't worry so much. Father was glad you'd fought so hard to protect me, *and* we offed a ton of Metal Heads, so you still have your position as commander... much to Erol's chagrin. He's always wanted your job."
Torn grinned at that, flicking his free hand absently. It wasn't hard to interpret what he meant. He wasn't fond of the arrogant racer, and he was quite dismissive of the mere thought of him. The girl made a face at him, then smiled again. "Yeah, I figured as much." She glanced off to the side then, seeming almost afraid to meet eyes with him again. "Oh, by the way... uhm... I... I'm sorry about before... when I kissed you. I wasn't thinking, and I understand you may not feel that way..."
////I acted so distant then,////
////Didn't say goodbye before you left,////
Her voice caught as his hand tightened around hers, the expression he wore sincere. He would not have her saying that. He respected, admired, and adored the woman. Slowly, he shook his head, rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb. Maybe she would understand...
For a moment, Ashelin just stared at him. Then, she gave a soft smile, bending down to press a kiss to his forehead. "You get better, Commander Torn. We've got a lot to talk about when your voice comes back!"
*****
And come back his voice did, nearly two weeks after the incident. Ashelin had visited him every day, and even with him unable to talk, they had slowly grown close... almost dangerously so. As soon as he heard his voice pass his own lips, however, he did not want Ashelin to hear it. The once soft, smooth voice he had grown up with was gone. He could no longer keep his voice quiet when he wanted, and it was pierced with a vicious, gravelly rattle from the damage to his trachea. He sounded like he was angry even when he tried to say a cheerful 'hello'. His mood had soured considerably at this.
////But I was listening.////
////You'll fight your battles far from me,////
The door slipped open at the start of visiting hours, and there stood Ashelin, smiling lightly at him. "Hey, Torn," she greeted softly. "How're you feeling? How's your voice?" He started to speak, then stopped, shaking his head. "Oh, come on. The doctor told me you were talking again... it can't be that bad."
Torn hesitated. He didn't want her to hear this.
Finally, he lifted his eyes to her, and he began to speak. "...It's not exactly what you remember..."
She stared. /Great,/ he thought bitterly. /Just great. I'd finally gotten close to her, and--.../
His thoughts stopped instantly when Ashelin walked to the bedside, sitting down and lifting her hand to gently rub the area around the stitches on his throat. "The doctor said there would be some damage, Torn. There's no way around that. You can speak, and you're alive... and that's what matters to me. That you're here in front of me, and that you can still talk to me." A smile crossed her features. "And you know something else? Even if you *couldn't* speak, it wouldn't change a damn thing. Besides... I think you sound dangerous now."
Torn's brow went up. "Oh?" he questioned, still unaccustomed to the harsh voice he now possessed. "That's a good thing?"
"I like a dangerous man," Ashelin replied with a smirk, leaning over until their noses were almost touching. "And you, Torn, are as dangerous as they come."
He grinned, but didn't move to touch her. "You're playing with fire, Ashelin. And in a hospital, no less. Someone could see us."
"I'll lock the door and draw the curtain. Sucks to be them if they hear us." She kissed his cheek lightly. "I just have to confirm something."
"And what's that?"
"I want to confirm that you're real."
******
"Torn!"
////Far too easily.////
Deja vu struck her, but this time, the terror was entirely different. A panicked Torn was heading towards the exit of the guard fortress, at a pace she had trouble keeping up with. As he reached the door, he turned to look at her. "...I can't stay here."
"What did you see?!"
There was a pause, and slowly, Torn walked over to Ashelin, pushing back her dreds with his fingertips. "I saw three men, strapped to tables... your father was injecting dark eco into them, and one of them was cut open from stomach to sternum. They're using people for test subjects! It's not science, Ashelin, it's torture... I refuse to work for a man who can be that cruel."
Ashelin stared at him in shock, not believing what she was hearing. Her father, Baron Praxis... using elven test subjects in his dark eco experiments? He had told her he was using lurkers! But she trusted Torn's word... she almost broke down on the spot. "No..."
The former commander took Ashelin's hand, resting the Krimzon Guard plate from his armor in her palm. "I'm a deserter, Ashelin. You shouldn't be seen with me."
////"Save your tears cause I'll come back,"////
////I could hear that you whispered////
////As you walked through that door,////
"...I'll help you, Torn."
"What?!"
Ashelin quickly grabbed his arm, pulling him into a secluded hallway. In the dark corner, she blocked any view of her with his body, standing up on tip-toe to kiss him hard and long. She spoke against his lips as she pulled away. "There's a dead-end alley in the slums... a building back there doesn't have anything in it, and it's got the perfect set-up. Organize the resistance... they need a good leader. You can stop this war. I... I'll try to reason with Father. But if I can't, I'll do what I can to help you."
Torn almost didn't believe what he was hearing, but after a moment, he nodded, pulling Ashelin to him in a tight embrace. "Don't forget."
"I wouldn't be able to, even if I wanted to."
////But still I swore////
////To hide the pain when I turn back the pages.////
////Shouting might have been the answer.////
The soon-to-be new commander of the Underground resistance gave a weak smile, tilting Ashelin's chin up slightly. "Don't start with the teary eyes... I *have* to do this. I'll come back to you."
She gave him another forceful kiss, and for a moment, the world was only them, standing in that hallway hidden from the eyes of other guards. The moment could not last, however, and the clanking of armor surprised Torn into standing straight and glancing over his shoulder. He didn't say anything. He just gave Ashelin's shoulder a gentle squeeze and ran off.
He had a war to win.
*****
"Why didn't you tell me Ashelin was Praxis's daughter? What's your connection with her?"
Jak was obviously furious with Torn, but Torn was far angrier. The Baron was pissed, and it was obviously the strange teen's fault that he was. Hearing that, though, caused the former Krimzon Guard to bristle. "That's none of your business!" he hissed. Letting out a deep breath to calm himself, he continued lowly. "Since you've stirred up the wumpbee's nest, you and whiskers here need to get four of our people to new safe houses. Shuttle each agent to a location they specify. Move all of them *without* any casualties. Don't screw this up, Jak!"
As the two left the hideout, Torn slammed his fist into the table. Things had gotten so complicated since he'd left the guard just a little under three years before. The war against the Baron was slowly moving foreward with the help of the strange Jak and his ottsel comrade Daxter, but the two were so irritating that Torn almost couldn't stand being around them.
He sighed as his communicator sparked to life, Ashelin's voice coming over it. "Torn... Father's sending me on more patrols. I won't be able to be in touch with you for a little while."
"Understood," Torn sighed. "Just... be careful."
"You know me, charming," Ashelin joked. "I'm always careful."
As the communicator buzzed out, he sighed. Sure. Always careful.
*****
Days like this always started out bad, and ended the same way. Ashelin spun to press her back tightly against an old wall, wincing as the lasers fired from the attacking Metal Heads whizzed past her head.
What had she done to deserve this? Half of the time, she didn't think her father even *cared* if she lived or died. Biting her lip, she turned to fire a few shots around the wall again. She heard the shriek of a Metal Head as the laser met it squarely in the face, but did not witness it fall as she quickly ducked behind her hiding spot again.
Her entire squad had already been wiped out... she was the only one left. There was no one to back her up should she run, and no one to find her should she die.
////What if I'd cried my eyes out and begged you not to depart?////
No one, she thought, until she heard a rough voice calling her name.
"Ashelin!!" Torn shouted past his own gunfire as he approached the woman's hiding place. "Hang on!"
Despite the gravelled tone to a once silken voice, Ashelin was happy to hear him nonetheless, towards him. "Torn!"
The ex-Krimzon Guard ducked behind the wall with her now, sidling up to her, prepping his gun quickly as he checked his back to ensure his knife was there should the laser weapon fail him. "Not like you to run off without back-up. In a hurry to die?"
"I *had* back-up," Ashelin replied dryly, "but they proved more cannon-fodder than anything else. How many shots do you have?"
Torn shrugged dismissively. "20 rounds. You?"
"30. I should go out."
She watched the man's shoulders stiffen as his ice blue eyes fixed on her face. "No way in fucking hell, Ashelin."
The woman frowned in reply. She knew how protective Torn was over her... since their days working together, he had been particularly close to her, and she knew it was no secret to most people that they were involved intimately. She wished he wouldn't treat her like she was made of glass, though...
Growling to herself, Ashelin didn't give Torn a chance to speak as she dove out into the line of fire, launching off round after round of laser fire from her gun at the attacking Metal Heads. Torn's jaw dropped only briefly before he cursed, jumping up to rest his arms on the top of the wall, picking off any Metal Head that got too close to the Baron's daughter with deadly accuracy.
But things sometimes don't go as planned with Metal Heads, and even less often do they ever turn out well. Such was the case that day. An explosion of eco as one Metal Head collided with an old tank sent Ashelin flying, taking out part of the wall with her and the debris. Torn shouted angrily, throwing himself into the fray. Before he knew it, he had cleared the metal heads and was standing victorious on the empty land left, his knife in his hand from where his gun had jammed.
Drawing in rapid breath, he spun on a dime, running to where Ashelin had landed, kneeling beside her. She was laying still, but her chest rose and fell slowly with her breathing, and that alone gave Torn hope. She was alive. That was what mattered.
He took great care not to disturb her too badly. With one hand, he cradled the back of her head, using his other arm to lift her carefully into his lap. "Ashelin...?" he whispered as well as he could. "Ashelin, wake up..."
After a moment of coaxing, Ashelin's lids fluttered open, and her dulled green eyes focused on the face of her old comrade. "Torn... did we get 'em...?"
The stalemate was broken. No one was there but them, and there was no reason to be strong. Torn shuddered once, all the way through, carefully readjusting Ashelin's weight. "We did... you fought like a wild catat out there..."
Ashelin smiled weakly. "Hell, if... if I'm any-... anything on the battlefield... like you say I am in bed... I must be one damn good fighter..."
Torn allowed himself to laugh at that, but the moment passed and after he had spent a moment thinking of what he should do, he shifted, gently lifting Ashelin into his arms. "Why did you do that, anyway? You could've been killed."
"Same as you," Ashelin murmured against Torn's shoulder. "But people... people always do crazy things... when they're in love..."
////But now I'm not afraid to say what's in my heart.////
Rolling his eyes, Torn made his way slowly back to the zoomer he'd left just inside the city walls, stopping only briefly to rest Ashelin and pull a cloak around himself to hide himself from the eyes of the Krimzon Guard patrols. "Wonderful time you've picked to be romantic, Ash."
"Smart-ass."
Torn smiled a bit at that... at least she was acting like she always did. He didn't speak for a few minutes until he had her situated in the zoomer and was driving along slowly, trying his hardest not to jostle her. "I'm going to take you to Vin's. We'll figure out what to do from there."
Ashelin didn't respond, but she kept her eyes open. Torn knew well enough what she was doing... saving her energy, and staying awake. Sighing, he just kept talking, saying as much as he could to her until they reached the power station.
*****
Vin nearly jumped clean out of his boots when the door to the power station slid open, clasping a shaking hand over his heart when he saw the cloaked figure of Torn carrying... someone walk through. "For the love of the Precursors, Torn, don't do that! You scared me half to death! Who's with you?"
Without a word, Torn shrugged off the cloak. As it fell back, Ashelin was revealed, laying limply in the Underground leader's arms. "She's hurt pretty bad, Vin."
"Oh, god!" Vin cried, adjusting his glasses on his nose. "Why didn't you say something sooner?! I'll get an ambulance... should I contact the Baron?"
"Not until after I leave," hissed Torn as he kicked around the cloak until he could lay Ashelin on it. "But call the ambulance now."
He had started to stand when Ashelin's hand closed tightly about his wrist. She was staring at him pleadingly, her soft face coated with a thin veil of sweat. "Don't... don't leave, Torn... it's okay... nothing's broken..."
Glancing briefly up to make certain Vin was occupied (which was not hard for the rather spastic scientist), Torn leaned over to rest his forehead against Ashelin's. "There could be internal damage, Ash... I don't want you to die."
"Like my father would care anyway," the girl growled softly in response. She managed to lift her head just enough to press a weak kiss to her comrade's lips. "I just want you here."
////Cause a thousand words////
////Call out through the ages.////
////They'll fly to you,////
////Even though I can't see I know////
////They're reaching you,////
////Suspended on silver wings.////
Torn frowned, rubbing Ashelin's temples with his thumbs. "...I never was able to say no to you..."
He sighed deeply, wincing slightly when Ashelin slowly lifted one hand, tracing her fingertips along a scar that crossed his throat. "...it's... because of that... that you have this..."
Torn just shook his head. The wound was old... very old. He had received it when he had been in charge of one squadron of the Krimzon Guard. In a Metal Head attack Ashelin had asked him to come with her to investigate, one Metal Head's razor-sharp pincer had pierced his throat, damaging his trachea... leaving him with the gravelled tone he spoke with now. That had been the first time they'd kissed... Ashelin, for the first time since he had known her, had been terrified that he would die. She had done what she felt needed to be done to get her feelings across.
Frowning softly, the leader of the resistance lifted his head, glancing at Vin. "Well?"
"I've contacted the hospital. But it'll be a while before someone gets here... you know how slow they are." Vin almost looked like he was twitching, he fidgetted so. The nervousness he portrayed almost made Torn laugh with how silly it was. "Keep her awake, Torn. If she goes to sleep or passes out, there's no telling if she'll even wake up."
Torn's eyes shot back to Ashelin after that. She occasionally looked like she wanted to pass out, eyelids fluttering. He reached over to press a hand against her forehead, speaking as softly as his voice would allow. "Look at me, Ash... there you go... no, no, keep your eyes on my face. All right? Don't you dare go to sleep, Ashelin, do you hear me?"
Ashelin nodded just slightly, watching Torn's expression shift. He never showed much emotion, even to show affection towards her, so this was a little bit of a change. "I promise."
Time seemed to drag on, and through the entirety of it, Torn kept hold of Ashelin's hand, watching her pained face for any signs of change. He heard voices outside, but the one that entered was't a medic at all. It was Jak, Daxter perched on his shoulder as always.
There was a moment where nothing was said before Jak's face drew tight. "What happened to her?"
"None of your business, asshole," Torn growled in reply. "There's an ambulance on the way. It'd be best if you made yourself scarce."
"And what about you?" questioned Daxter, standing from his crouched position to lean against Jak's head. "I'm sure the guard'd just love to snag a deserter. You'd probably get accused of tryin' to murder the Baron's daughter, and if you're lucky, you'll just get *tested* on!"
Torn stared at Ashelin's tormented expression for a moment, then closed his eyes. They were right... if he wanted to be there for her, he had to give up for her. "...Ashelin, hold on, okay? The ambulance will be here soon."
"I don't want to be alone, Torn...!"
The leader of the resistance squeezed the woman's hand gently. "It's okay. I promise I'll come see you, just like you did with me. All right?"
////Oh, a thousand words...////
////One thousand embraces////
////Will cradle you,////
////Making all of your weary days////
////Seem far away.////
////They'll hold you forever.////
She nodded softly, and Torn kissed her forehead before he ran out on Jak's heels, casting one last glance back at Ashelin's immobile form. She would be fine.
*****
The days turned into weeks, Ashelin recovered slowly, and the war became more and more violent. Ashelin tried her hardest to keep faith in her father's cause, but in the end, he was wrong... and the world's fate soon rested on Jak.
The final battle passed, Jak and Daxter defeating the metal head leader and escaping by the skin of their teeth. Parties erupted all through Haven City, but Ashelin found Torn away from the action, sitting at the top of the stairs at the foot of the throne she had inherited as the now-governor of the city. "Hey there," she said quietly.
"Hey."
"There's parties everywhere."
"...Yeah, I know."
Well, that had gone horribly. Ashelin almost frowned when a voice on her communicator caught her attention. "Your transport is ready, m'lady," came the voice of Brutter.
Smiling a little at the opportunity, Ashelin nodded. "Thank you, Captain Brutter." Her attention returned to Torn. "Come on... we'll be late for the party at Daxter's new place."
Torn blinked at her, then shook his head slightly, quickly glancing away. "I've got so much work to do. Besides, it's not my thing."
Only briefly did Ashelin seem discouraged, but while her companion was occupied, she leaned down by his ear. "Ten hut!" Instantly, Torn lept to his feet, back rigid as he stood in perfect attention. Ashelin continued in a firm tone, although a smile was playing with the corners of her lips as she walked along behind him. "As the new governor of this city, I order the Commander of the New Krimzon Guard to escort me to an official function. Is that understood?"
Torn stammered. "Yes sir! I mean, yes ma'am! I mean..."
////Oh, a thousand words////
////Have never been spoken.////
////They'll fly to you,////
////They'll carry you home and back into my arms,////
////Suspended on silver wings.////
"You can start rebuilding the city tomorrow. Tonight, we get to celebrate with our new friends." Smiling wickedly, she slipped her arms around Torn's neck from behind, resting her chin on his shoulder. "Besides, tough guy, I'm dying to see you dance."
He just grinned playfully, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Not likely."
*****
His fingers lightly brushed the scar on his throat, remembering the pain, and everything he had gone through since then. Ice blue eyes stayed focused on the ceiling of the old Underground hideout. He would leave this place today no longer as a rebel... but instead as the commander of the New Krimzon Guard, under the rule of Ashelin. The very same Ashelin that was spooned against his side like a lazy cat.
He let out a deep sigh, listening to the rattling he could hear, thinking of what he had become.
Ashelin's movement pulled him out of his thoughts, and he glanced down towards her, lightly toying with her dreds. "Good morning, sleeping beauty. Have a nice rest?"
"Mm... I'm still drowsy. Give me a few minutes to wake up before asking me any really tough questions."
Torn rolled his eyes, flipping to lay on his side as he focused on Ashelin. She was avoiding his eyes, her hands pulled to her chest. Wondering what could have upset her so, Torn reached over and pulled her closer, resting her head against the hollow between his shoulder and neck. "Something bothering you, Ash?"
"...I can't hate him, Torn. Father, he... maybe he did some horrible things, but he was my father. No matter how I think about it, he's all I ever knew."
Allowing himself a smile, Torn shifted slightly, enjoying just having her there. "That's perfectly normal, Ash. No one would question you."
He kissed her forehead, enjoying the peacefulness of the moment. After all the fighting, they were together for real. In public, no one would have ever seen this side of Torn. Only Ashelin had ever seen him sentimental, and even then he was usually reserved about it. But this was different. There was no longer that fear lingering over their head.
////And a thousand words////
////Call out through the ages.////
////They'll cradle you,////
////Turn all of the lonely years to only days.////
////They'll hold you forever.////
Torn blinked as he felt warm tears against his chest, and he said nothing. He just held Ashelin all the more tightly, rubbing her back, being there for her. That was what she needed... she had a lot to do now. She was the governor of a new city. And he would be there beside her the whole way, through whatever she needed.
////Ohh...////
Ashelin smiled softly against his chest as she came out of a fit of tears. They could rebuild this city, together and with Jak, Daxter, Keira, and Samos. No one would stop them... they had a city to save. These thoughts in her mind, she stretched up and kissed Torn full on, saying everything she'd ever meant in that one action. They were home.
////A thousand words.////
~=~End~=~
~=~On Silver Wings~=~
"*TORN!*"
Ashelin practically shrieked as she broke away from the Metal Head she was fighting, turning to her friend. The commander was on his hands and knees, choking, one hand pressed to his throat and eyes wide with a terror he was not accustomed to. A clawed Metal Head roared its victory in a shrill cry near him, holding its bloody pincer in the air.
The woman paid no heed to the Metal Heads she came across on her way. Furious and frightened, she took each one down, all the while screaming her friend's name.
She fired on the one that had struck him. She fired again and again and again until she was sure that twisted body would not rise again. Then, she turned to him.
Torn's mouth was moving without words, and blood was dripping around his fingers and over his lips. The thing had pierced his throat... he wasn't breathing properly... Ashelin started to panic, fumbling in her sachel for a health pack, anything to help the commander of the Krimzon Guard that she had come to respect so much.
"Torn, don't die... please... stay with me, Torn, look at me! Oh, god, your throat... oh, by the Precursors, Torn..."
Those icy eyes turned to her, focused on her through the pain and the fear, and he choked out a harsh whisper. "Ashelin... I'm okay..."
////I know that you're hiding things,////
////Using gentle words to shelter me.////
She shook her head quickly, coaxing him to lay down on his side. "No, no, you're not." She gently pried his fingers away from his throat, and the damage came fully into view. Ashelin's stomach heaved, but quickly, she pressed a clean cloth over the woud. "Torn, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention... I..."
His head shook slowly, his eyes never leaving her face. She tried to assess the damage mentally, rushing with what she did, but trying to be as careful as she could. What if he couldn't speak? He'd had such a soft voice when she'd met him. She liked his voice, really. Torn was the sort of person she enjoyed being around... unlike that presumptuous fool Erol.
Torn slowly started to calm down from his earlier panic, Ashelin's help allowing him to breathe somewhat. Ashelin leaned down close, brushing his dreads away from his face carefully. "Don't you dare give up, Commander Torn. I'll never forgive you if you do."
"Ashelin..." said he, his voice coming out as a rocky whisper. "There's... not enough... Pre--... Precursor Orbs in the world... to make me give up... with you here..."
////Your words were like a dream,////
////But dreams could never fool me...////
Those words made her blink, and she swore her heart wasn't working for a moment. Furiously, she rubbed away tears that formed in her sharp green eyes, and without thinking, she leant down and kissed him. While at first he seemed shocked, the commander softened into it a bit, and when she pulled back, he was watching her carefully. She smiled at him, ignoring the coppery taste of his blood that lingered on her lips. "I'll get you help. I refuse to let you die out here."
Torn just barely smiled before he found he could keep his eyes open no longer, and his vision faded into darkness.
*****
////Not that easily.////
When Torn awoke next, he was laying in a hospital bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt the itch of stitches in his throat, scratchy bandages overlaying. That was worse than the pain. He tried to speak, but nothing came out, and he started to panic all over again. Had that Metal Head destroyed his voice?
"Shh, Torn, it's okay. The doctor says it'll be a few days before your voice comes back... although there may be some damage to it."
The voice belonged to Ashelin, and Torn blinked in surprise as he looked towards her. He hadn't expected her to be at the hospital, waiting for him to wake up. He had, after all, simply dreamed that whole kiss... hadn't he?
Closing his eyes with what passed as a groan, he sunk further into the pillow. Ashelin laughed and grabbed his hand, lacing her fingers with his. "Don't worry so much. Father was glad you'd fought so hard to protect me, *and* we offed a ton of Metal Heads, so you still have your position as commander... much to Erol's chagrin. He's always wanted your job."
Torn grinned at that, flicking his free hand absently. It wasn't hard to interpret what he meant. He wasn't fond of the arrogant racer, and he was quite dismissive of the mere thought of him. The girl made a face at him, then smiled again. "Yeah, I figured as much." She glanced off to the side then, seeming almost afraid to meet eyes with him again. "Oh, by the way... uhm... I... I'm sorry about before... when I kissed you. I wasn't thinking, and I understand you may not feel that way..."
////I acted so distant then,////
////Didn't say goodbye before you left,////
Her voice caught as his hand tightened around hers, the expression he wore sincere. He would not have her saying that. He respected, admired, and adored the woman. Slowly, he shook his head, rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb. Maybe she would understand...
For a moment, Ashelin just stared at him. Then, she gave a soft smile, bending down to press a kiss to his forehead. "You get better, Commander Torn. We've got a lot to talk about when your voice comes back!"
*****
And come back his voice did, nearly two weeks after the incident. Ashelin had visited him every day, and even with him unable to talk, they had slowly grown close... almost dangerously so. As soon as he heard his voice pass his own lips, however, he did not want Ashelin to hear it. The once soft, smooth voice he had grown up with was gone. He could no longer keep his voice quiet when he wanted, and it was pierced with a vicious, gravelly rattle from the damage to his trachea. He sounded like he was angry even when he tried to say a cheerful 'hello'. His mood had soured considerably at this.
////But I was listening.////
////You'll fight your battles far from me,////
The door slipped open at the start of visiting hours, and there stood Ashelin, smiling lightly at him. "Hey, Torn," she greeted softly. "How're you feeling? How's your voice?" He started to speak, then stopped, shaking his head. "Oh, come on. The doctor told me you were talking again... it can't be that bad."
Torn hesitated. He didn't want her to hear this.
Finally, he lifted his eyes to her, and he began to speak. "...It's not exactly what you remember..."
She stared. /Great,/ he thought bitterly. /Just great. I'd finally gotten close to her, and--.../
His thoughts stopped instantly when Ashelin walked to the bedside, sitting down and lifting her hand to gently rub the area around the stitches on his throat. "The doctor said there would be some damage, Torn. There's no way around that. You can speak, and you're alive... and that's what matters to me. That you're here in front of me, and that you can still talk to me." A smile crossed her features. "And you know something else? Even if you *couldn't* speak, it wouldn't change a damn thing. Besides... I think you sound dangerous now."
Torn's brow went up. "Oh?" he questioned, still unaccustomed to the harsh voice he now possessed. "That's a good thing?"
"I like a dangerous man," Ashelin replied with a smirk, leaning over until their noses were almost touching. "And you, Torn, are as dangerous as they come."
He grinned, but didn't move to touch her. "You're playing with fire, Ashelin. And in a hospital, no less. Someone could see us."
"I'll lock the door and draw the curtain. Sucks to be them if they hear us." She kissed his cheek lightly. "I just have to confirm something."
"And what's that?"
"I want to confirm that you're real."
******
"Torn!"
////Far too easily.////
Deja vu struck her, but this time, the terror was entirely different. A panicked Torn was heading towards the exit of the guard fortress, at a pace she had trouble keeping up with. As he reached the door, he turned to look at her. "...I can't stay here."
"What did you see?!"
There was a pause, and slowly, Torn walked over to Ashelin, pushing back her dreds with his fingertips. "I saw three men, strapped to tables... your father was injecting dark eco into them, and one of them was cut open from stomach to sternum. They're using people for test subjects! It's not science, Ashelin, it's torture... I refuse to work for a man who can be that cruel."
Ashelin stared at him in shock, not believing what she was hearing. Her father, Baron Praxis... using elven test subjects in his dark eco experiments? He had told her he was using lurkers! But she trusted Torn's word... she almost broke down on the spot. "No..."
The former commander took Ashelin's hand, resting the Krimzon Guard plate from his armor in her palm. "I'm a deserter, Ashelin. You shouldn't be seen with me."
////"Save your tears cause I'll come back,"////
////I could hear that you whispered////
////As you walked through that door,////
"...I'll help you, Torn."
"What?!"
Ashelin quickly grabbed his arm, pulling him into a secluded hallway. In the dark corner, she blocked any view of her with his body, standing up on tip-toe to kiss him hard and long. She spoke against his lips as she pulled away. "There's a dead-end alley in the slums... a building back there doesn't have anything in it, and it's got the perfect set-up. Organize the resistance... they need a good leader. You can stop this war. I... I'll try to reason with Father. But if I can't, I'll do what I can to help you."
Torn almost didn't believe what he was hearing, but after a moment, he nodded, pulling Ashelin to him in a tight embrace. "Don't forget."
"I wouldn't be able to, even if I wanted to."
////But still I swore////
////To hide the pain when I turn back the pages.////
////Shouting might have been the answer.////
The soon-to-be new commander of the Underground resistance gave a weak smile, tilting Ashelin's chin up slightly. "Don't start with the teary eyes... I *have* to do this. I'll come back to you."
She gave him another forceful kiss, and for a moment, the world was only them, standing in that hallway hidden from the eyes of other guards. The moment could not last, however, and the clanking of armor surprised Torn into standing straight and glancing over his shoulder. He didn't say anything. He just gave Ashelin's shoulder a gentle squeeze and ran off.
He had a war to win.
*****
"Why didn't you tell me Ashelin was Praxis's daughter? What's your connection with her?"
Jak was obviously furious with Torn, but Torn was far angrier. The Baron was pissed, and it was obviously the strange teen's fault that he was. Hearing that, though, caused the former Krimzon Guard to bristle. "That's none of your business!" he hissed. Letting out a deep breath to calm himself, he continued lowly. "Since you've stirred up the wumpbee's nest, you and whiskers here need to get four of our people to new safe houses. Shuttle each agent to a location they specify. Move all of them *without* any casualties. Don't screw this up, Jak!"
As the two left the hideout, Torn slammed his fist into the table. Things had gotten so complicated since he'd left the guard just a little under three years before. The war against the Baron was slowly moving foreward with the help of the strange Jak and his ottsel comrade Daxter, but the two were so irritating that Torn almost couldn't stand being around them.
He sighed as his communicator sparked to life, Ashelin's voice coming over it. "Torn... Father's sending me on more patrols. I won't be able to be in touch with you for a little while."
"Understood," Torn sighed. "Just... be careful."
"You know me, charming," Ashelin joked. "I'm always careful."
As the communicator buzzed out, he sighed. Sure. Always careful.
*****
Days like this always started out bad, and ended the same way. Ashelin spun to press her back tightly against an old wall, wincing as the lasers fired from the attacking Metal Heads whizzed past her head.
What had she done to deserve this? Half of the time, she didn't think her father even *cared* if she lived or died. Biting her lip, she turned to fire a few shots around the wall again. She heard the shriek of a Metal Head as the laser met it squarely in the face, but did not witness it fall as she quickly ducked behind her hiding spot again.
Her entire squad had already been wiped out... she was the only one left. There was no one to back her up should she run, and no one to find her should she die.
////What if I'd cried my eyes out and begged you not to depart?////
No one, she thought, until she heard a rough voice calling her name.
"Ashelin!!" Torn shouted past his own gunfire as he approached the woman's hiding place. "Hang on!"
Despite the gravelled tone to a once silken voice, Ashelin was happy to hear him nonetheless, towards him. "Torn!"
The ex-Krimzon Guard ducked behind the wall with her now, sidling up to her, prepping his gun quickly as he checked his back to ensure his knife was there should the laser weapon fail him. "Not like you to run off without back-up. In a hurry to die?"
"I *had* back-up," Ashelin replied dryly, "but they proved more cannon-fodder than anything else. How many shots do you have?"
Torn shrugged dismissively. "20 rounds. You?"
"30. I should go out."
She watched the man's shoulders stiffen as his ice blue eyes fixed on her face. "No way in fucking hell, Ashelin."
The woman frowned in reply. She knew how protective Torn was over her... since their days working together, he had been particularly close to her, and she knew it was no secret to most people that they were involved intimately. She wished he wouldn't treat her like she was made of glass, though...
Growling to herself, Ashelin didn't give Torn a chance to speak as she dove out into the line of fire, launching off round after round of laser fire from her gun at the attacking Metal Heads. Torn's jaw dropped only briefly before he cursed, jumping up to rest his arms on the top of the wall, picking off any Metal Head that got too close to the Baron's daughter with deadly accuracy.
But things sometimes don't go as planned with Metal Heads, and even less often do they ever turn out well. Such was the case that day. An explosion of eco as one Metal Head collided with an old tank sent Ashelin flying, taking out part of the wall with her and the debris. Torn shouted angrily, throwing himself into the fray. Before he knew it, he had cleared the metal heads and was standing victorious on the empty land left, his knife in his hand from where his gun had jammed.
Drawing in rapid breath, he spun on a dime, running to where Ashelin had landed, kneeling beside her. She was laying still, but her chest rose and fell slowly with her breathing, and that alone gave Torn hope. She was alive. That was what mattered.
He took great care not to disturb her too badly. With one hand, he cradled the back of her head, using his other arm to lift her carefully into his lap. "Ashelin...?" he whispered as well as he could. "Ashelin, wake up..."
After a moment of coaxing, Ashelin's lids fluttered open, and her dulled green eyes focused on the face of her old comrade. "Torn... did we get 'em...?"
The stalemate was broken. No one was there but them, and there was no reason to be strong. Torn shuddered once, all the way through, carefully readjusting Ashelin's weight. "We did... you fought like a wild catat out there..."
Ashelin smiled weakly. "Hell, if... if I'm any-... anything on the battlefield... like you say I am in bed... I must be one damn good fighter..."
Torn allowed himself to laugh at that, but the moment passed and after he had spent a moment thinking of what he should do, he shifted, gently lifting Ashelin into his arms. "Why did you do that, anyway? You could've been killed."
"Same as you," Ashelin murmured against Torn's shoulder. "But people... people always do crazy things... when they're in love..."
////But now I'm not afraid to say what's in my heart.////
Rolling his eyes, Torn made his way slowly back to the zoomer he'd left just inside the city walls, stopping only briefly to rest Ashelin and pull a cloak around himself to hide himself from the eyes of the Krimzon Guard patrols. "Wonderful time you've picked to be romantic, Ash."
"Smart-ass."
Torn smiled a bit at that... at least she was acting like she always did. He didn't speak for a few minutes until he had her situated in the zoomer and was driving along slowly, trying his hardest not to jostle her. "I'm going to take you to Vin's. We'll figure out what to do from there."
Ashelin didn't respond, but she kept her eyes open. Torn knew well enough what she was doing... saving her energy, and staying awake. Sighing, he just kept talking, saying as much as he could to her until they reached the power station.
*****
Vin nearly jumped clean out of his boots when the door to the power station slid open, clasping a shaking hand over his heart when he saw the cloaked figure of Torn carrying... someone walk through. "For the love of the Precursors, Torn, don't do that! You scared me half to death! Who's with you?"
Without a word, Torn shrugged off the cloak. As it fell back, Ashelin was revealed, laying limply in the Underground leader's arms. "She's hurt pretty bad, Vin."
"Oh, god!" Vin cried, adjusting his glasses on his nose. "Why didn't you say something sooner?! I'll get an ambulance... should I contact the Baron?"
"Not until after I leave," hissed Torn as he kicked around the cloak until he could lay Ashelin on it. "But call the ambulance now."
He had started to stand when Ashelin's hand closed tightly about his wrist. She was staring at him pleadingly, her soft face coated with a thin veil of sweat. "Don't... don't leave, Torn... it's okay... nothing's broken..."
Glancing briefly up to make certain Vin was occupied (which was not hard for the rather spastic scientist), Torn leaned over to rest his forehead against Ashelin's. "There could be internal damage, Ash... I don't want you to die."
"Like my father would care anyway," the girl growled softly in response. She managed to lift her head just enough to press a weak kiss to her comrade's lips. "I just want you here."
////Cause a thousand words////
////Call out through the ages.////
////They'll fly to you,////
////Even though I can't see I know////
////They're reaching you,////
////Suspended on silver wings.////
Torn frowned, rubbing Ashelin's temples with his thumbs. "...I never was able to say no to you..."
He sighed deeply, wincing slightly when Ashelin slowly lifted one hand, tracing her fingertips along a scar that crossed his throat. "...it's... because of that... that you have this..."
Torn just shook his head. The wound was old... very old. He had received it when he had been in charge of one squadron of the Krimzon Guard. In a Metal Head attack Ashelin had asked him to come with her to investigate, one Metal Head's razor-sharp pincer had pierced his throat, damaging his trachea... leaving him with the gravelled tone he spoke with now. That had been the first time they'd kissed... Ashelin, for the first time since he had known her, had been terrified that he would die. She had done what she felt needed to be done to get her feelings across.
Frowning softly, the leader of the resistance lifted his head, glancing at Vin. "Well?"
"I've contacted the hospital. But it'll be a while before someone gets here... you know how slow they are." Vin almost looked like he was twitching, he fidgetted so. The nervousness he portrayed almost made Torn laugh with how silly it was. "Keep her awake, Torn. If she goes to sleep or passes out, there's no telling if she'll even wake up."
Torn's eyes shot back to Ashelin after that. She occasionally looked like she wanted to pass out, eyelids fluttering. He reached over to press a hand against her forehead, speaking as softly as his voice would allow. "Look at me, Ash... there you go... no, no, keep your eyes on my face. All right? Don't you dare go to sleep, Ashelin, do you hear me?"
Ashelin nodded just slightly, watching Torn's expression shift. He never showed much emotion, even to show affection towards her, so this was a little bit of a change. "I promise."
Time seemed to drag on, and through the entirety of it, Torn kept hold of Ashelin's hand, watching her pained face for any signs of change. He heard voices outside, but the one that entered was't a medic at all. It was Jak, Daxter perched on his shoulder as always.
There was a moment where nothing was said before Jak's face drew tight. "What happened to her?"
"None of your business, asshole," Torn growled in reply. "There's an ambulance on the way. It'd be best if you made yourself scarce."
"And what about you?" questioned Daxter, standing from his crouched position to lean against Jak's head. "I'm sure the guard'd just love to snag a deserter. You'd probably get accused of tryin' to murder the Baron's daughter, and if you're lucky, you'll just get *tested* on!"
Torn stared at Ashelin's tormented expression for a moment, then closed his eyes. They were right... if he wanted to be there for her, he had to give up for her. "...Ashelin, hold on, okay? The ambulance will be here soon."
"I don't want to be alone, Torn...!"
The leader of the resistance squeezed the woman's hand gently. "It's okay. I promise I'll come see you, just like you did with me. All right?"
////Oh, a thousand words...////
////One thousand embraces////
////Will cradle you,////
////Making all of your weary days////
////Seem far away.////
////They'll hold you forever.////
She nodded softly, and Torn kissed her forehead before he ran out on Jak's heels, casting one last glance back at Ashelin's immobile form. She would be fine.
*****
The days turned into weeks, Ashelin recovered slowly, and the war became more and more violent. Ashelin tried her hardest to keep faith in her father's cause, but in the end, he was wrong... and the world's fate soon rested on Jak.
The final battle passed, Jak and Daxter defeating the metal head leader and escaping by the skin of their teeth. Parties erupted all through Haven City, but Ashelin found Torn away from the action, sitting at the top of the stairs at the foot of the throne she had inherited as the now-governor of the city. "Hey there," she said quietly.
"Hey."
"There's parties everywhere."
"...Yeah, I know."
Well, that had gone horribly. Ashelin almost frowned when a voice on her communicator caught her attention. "Your transport is ready, m'lady," came the voice of Brutter.
Smiling a little at the opportunity, Ashelin nodded. "Thank you, Captain Brutter." Her attention returned to Torn. "Come on... we'll be late for the party at Daxter's new place."
Torn blinked at her, then shook his head slightly, quickly glancing away. "I've got so much work to do. Besides, it's not my thing."
Only briefly did Ashelin seem discouraged, but while her companion was occupied, she leaned down by his ear. "Ten hut!" Instantly, Torn lept to his feet, back rigid as he stood in perfect attention. Ashelin continued in a firm tone, although a smile was playing with the corners of her lips as she walked along behind him. "As the new governor of this city, I order the Commander of the New Krimzon Guard to escort me to an official function. Is that understood?"
Torn stammered. "Yes sir! I mean, yes ma'am! I mean..."
////Oh, a thousand words////
////Have never been spoken.////
////They'll fly to you,////
////They'll carry you home and back into my arms,////
////Suspended on silver wings.////
"You can start rebuilding the city tomorrow. Tonight, we get to celebrate with our new friends." Smiling wickedly, she slipped her arms around Torn's neck from behind, resting her chin on his shoulder. "Besides, tough guy, I'm dying to see you dance."
He just grinned playfully, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Not likely."
*****
His fingers lightly brushed the scar on his throat, remembering the pain, and everything he had gone through since then. Ice blue eyes stayed focused on the ceiling of the old Underground hideout. He would leave this place today no longer as a rebel... but instead as the commander of the New Krimzon Guard, under the rule of Ashelin. The very same Ashelin that was spooned against his side like a lazy cat.
He let out a deep sigh, listening to the rattling he could hear, thinking of what he had become.
Ashelin's movement pulled him out of his thoughts, and he glanced down towards her, lightly toying with her dreds. "Good morning, sleeping beauty. Have a nice rest?"
"Mm... I'm still drowsy. Give me a few minutes to wake up before asking me any really tough questions."
Torn rolled his eyes, flipping to lay on his side as he focused on Ashelin. She was avoiding his eyes, her hands pulled to her chest. Wondering what could have upset her so, Torn reached over and pulled her closer, resting her head against the hollow between his shoulder and neck. "Something bothering you, Ash?"
"...I can't hate him, Torn. Father, he... maybe he did some horrible things, but he was my father. No matter how I think about it, he's all I ever knew."
Allowing himself a smile, Torn shifted slightly, enjoying just having her there. "That's perfectly normal, Ash. No one would question you."
He kissed her forehead, enjoying the peacefulness of the moment. After all the fighting, they were together for real. In public, no one would have ever seen this side of Torn. Only Ashelin had ever seen him sentimental, and even then he was usually reserved about it. But this was different. There was no longer that fear lingering over their head.
////And a thousand words////
////Call out through the ages.////
////They'll cradle you,////
////Turn all of the lonely years to only days.////
////They'll hold you forever.////
Torn blinked as he felt warm tears against his chest, and he said nothing. He just held Ashelin all the more tightly, rubbing her back, being there for her. That was what she needed... she had a lot to do now. She was the governor of a new city. And he would be there beside her the whole way, through whatever she needed.
////Ohh...////
Ashelin smiled softly against his chest as she came out of a fit of tears. They could rebuild this city, together and with Jak, Daxter, Keira, and Samos. No one would stop them... they had a city to save. These thoughts in her mind, she stretched up and kissed Torn full on, saying everything she'd ever meant in that one action. They were home.
////A thousand words.////
~=~End~=~