Friendship is HARDCORE
Hi I don't own MLP
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One day Twilight Sparkle was walking down the street. "AWWW FUCK YEAH!" she said. Her grandmother was crawling up her leg with a knife in between her teeth, and racist old guy comments were falling out of the empty sockets of her eyes. "GRANDMAW LOOK OUT FOR DAT LITTLE GREEN SPACE MAN JESUS," said Twilight Sparkle. Grandma's mouth opened and a sound like a thousand abortions went screaming into the ozone layer.
Twilight Sparkle had been sold bad LSD. Technically the LSD was doing its job, but there was more cocaine than LSD used to make the junk and Twilight Sparkle was freaking out. "HOLY JESUS WHAT ARE THESE GODDAMN ANIMALS?" There were strange equestrian creatures walking in the street. "FUCKING HELL THEY'RE SODOMIZING INNOCENT BICYCLES IN A CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST."
A demon baby waddled up. Raw sewage poured from its mouth. "Hey Twilight, I've been looking all over for you!"
"OH GOD WHAT MANNER OF FOUL BEASTS ARE THE NARCS RECRUITING THESE DAYS?"
"Twilight, its Spike! Are you feeling okay?"
"YOU SATANIC BABY, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I KILLED KIDS YOUNGER THAN YOU IN VIETNAM." Using all her 'nam fighting powers, Twilight reached into the demons anus and ripped out its spinal column. "FUCK YOU COMMIE SCUM!"
Just then Jesus Christ appeared. Jesus started fucking the demon's corpse in the ass.
"JESUS, I AM COOL WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU SUPPORT WHAT I DID IN NAM," said Twilight. Jesus smiled as his skin dissolved into maggots and blood poured out of his pores. A low rattle issued from his throat has his shrivelled husk crumbled up on the ground.
The blood pile of Jesus and Twilight then went to Church like good, solid citizens of America. God approved of their actions that day.