Bernie couldn't stop being sick. Her shift started an hour ago and she'd spent most of that time running to and from the toilet much to Raf's amusement.
"Heavy night?" he asked with a knowing grin on his face.
"You don't know the half of it" was all Bernie could muster by way of response.
After sharing a passionate kiss with Serena, the brunette had busied herself checking on Fletch and then explaining that she had to rush back to Jason. Bernie had seen it then, they would be pretending that the kiss never happened, so she drank until she couldn't remember it. If she was honest with herself she couldn't remember very much. She knew she'd ended up in a gay bar in town because there was a receipt in her jacket pocket and she remembered being sick at some point during the night but otherwise it was a blur. The only silver lining was the fact that her current state was providing Raf with some amusement on an otherwise gloomy day.
"Follow me Ms Wolfe" he beckoned as he headed towards the empty side room.
"There's no patient in there" she pointed out as they walked.
"Precisely! Jump up on the bed."
"I'm sorry to disappoint you but you're not really my type." The grin between the pair of them was quick to disperse as a wave of nausea overwhelmed Bernie once more and Raf hurried around the room in search of a sick bowl.
"If Serena knew I was doing this she'd have my guts but I can't have you walking around like a zombie today." The Scottish doctor had admimisterd an anti-emetic and attached Bernie to a dextrose drip. "I'll shut the blinds. Give that 30 minutes to run through. Maybe get some sleep." He gently squeezed her hand before slipping out to get back to work. Ms Wolfe was normally nothing but professional and he knew she was upset about Fletch so he was only too happy to help her out. Serena was due in shortly so he'd cope.
Approaching the doors to AAU, Serena's heart was beating out of her chest. She hadn't stopped thinking about the kiss all night. She'd even dreamt about Bernie when she'd eventually got to sleep and she had no idea how to play it. Bernie was attractive there was no doubt about it but Serena had always just thought she knew that in a purely subjective way, in the same way as she could see and appreciate that any number of women were attractive. Yet when the blonde had kissed her it lit a fire in her that she hadn't felt in a long time. Since her first time with Edward if she was being honest with herself. She'd kissed other women during her student days, on nights out or during games of truth or dare. On one particular night things had even gone a bit further with one of her friends but it was just experimenting and she'd never thought of herself as bisexual yet here she was, with butterflies, thinking about Bernie.
The door buzzed as her staff card released the lock lifting her out of her reverie and she stepped through it. Immediately Raf looked up to attract her attention. "Morning Serena, can we have a quick chat in your office?"
"Walk and talk, is this about Fletch?"
"In a sense…" He waited for the office door to swing shut before continuing. "It's Bernie. I think she's blaming herself. She hit the bottle pretty hard last night. She's not stopped being sick since she got here."
A strong feeling of guilt rested at the pit of Serena's stomach. This wasn't about Fletch, this was because she'd pushed Bernie away.
"Where is she? We'll get her on some fluids."
"I'm glad you said that because I'm a little bit ahead of you. She's in the side room on a drip and I gave her an anti-emetic injection."
"Thanks, are you OK if I go and check on her?"
"Absolutely" Raf responded but Serena was already on her way.
Entering the side room Serena smiled, hearing the soft snores coming from the poorly surgeon. On closer inspection she noticed the cold sweat of a hangover from hell glistening across her forehead and a used sick bowl lying to the side of her. Serena picked it up and disposed of it, bringing a clean one across. The noise woke Bernie and seeing who was in the room the mortification set in.
"I need to get back to work." She sat up and started removing the cannula from her own arm.
"Let me do it." Serena placed a hand on Bernie's forearm and couldn't fail to notice the goosebumps. Neither of them moved then Serena began to lean in and Bernie quickly moved her face out of her path. She saw the confusion etched on her friend's face.
"If you want to see what I taste like after this morning then be my guest but believe me I wouldn't recommend it."
"Ah yes, gin never tastes as good the next morning." The two women managed to share a laugh over their current situation but it's short lived.
"Was last night because of me?" Serena asked tentatively.
Bernie sighed as she gathered her thoughts. Serena hated lies but she knew that this was going to sting.
"You, Fletch, Alex, Marcus, the kids. I needed to forget but yes I wanted to forget our kiss most of all. Fearless you said, last night I was terrified. I was sure that you'd hate me, that you might even report me. I love this place, as much as I never thought I would, I feel at home here and I really like you. Maybe it'd be easier to say the kiss happened because we were both upset about Fletch but honestly since the first moment I saw you I've wondered what it'd feel like to kiss you."
"That's quite a speech Ms Wolfe. I'm sorry I ran off and that you did this to yourself as a result. The kiss was lovely. It made me tingle in a way I haven't for a long time. I've never labelled myself as bisexual but I'm not against seeing where this goes. One condition though - no more hangovers on shift."
"Deal!"
Bernie slowly stood up from the bed and allowed Serena to put a comforting arm around her. "I really was an idiot last night, I fear I may have called Alex in the wee hours of the morning."
"What did you say?"
"If memory serves I told her about our kiss and that I was moving on and less than gently suggested she did the same. I think I made her cry."
Serena could see the hurt and panic etched in to Bernie's face. "She's a big girl. She'll be OK."
"I think she'll go back to the Army. Due to the IED incident they allowed her to put things on hold in much the same way I have."
"Maybe it's for the best." Serena knew she was being selfish but equally thought that was probably what her friend and potential future lover needed to hear.
Somehow they managed to get through the shift without any further incident. Fletch was recovering well and now conscious, chatting up the nurses and giving Bernie a hard time about choosing the night he was lying in hospital for a proper drink as he was calling it.
As both women gathered their bags and coats Serena made a bold move.
"Come back to mine? I'll run you a bubble bath and we can order pizza?"
It sounded heavenly but Bernie was nervous that she'd read things wrongly and make a fool of herself. As if reading her mind Serena clarified "Jason is out until 11, I have the place to myself and I'd love to play nurse." The audible moan that escaped Bernie's lips at that final comment made Serena even more sure that she wanted this and she needed it.