A/N: I was sitting in Math class, bored out of my wits, when suddenly, this idea came to mind! It's from the point of view of the sorting hat. so, join Muggles for Equal Treatment of Magical Articles (METMA) for only 2 sickles, and you can help these terribly treated objects!
Disclaimer: BLeh, I hate disclaimers. Anyway, I don't own anything HP related, exept for METMA, cuz i made that up, *go me*
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I can't believe it. I CAN'T BELIEVE it! I spend my whole f*cking year writing that song, and Dumbledore says, "No, this is inappropriate. Please re-write it." After I poured my heart and soul into that song! I mean, come on, its not like I wrote anything that d*mn bad. I mean, we all KNOW Slytherins are lousy gits, so why not say so? And Hufflepuffs ARE full of sh*t, Headmaster, I don't care WHAT you say to try to convince me.
I do NOT deserve to be censored this way! This isn't Salem, or Transylvania! This is ENGLAND! I should have freedom of speech! After all, my life sure isn't perfect. Dumbledore's old storage closet doesn't see much action (except for the few times when McGonagall and Snape use it... o.O..) So, after most of the year carefully plotting a way to escape the closet (which has always ended in defeat, so far), I sit down for a couple of minutes to write a cutesy little school song. No one really listens to it except for a couple first years, so why SHOULDN'T I mention that all the sluts are in Slytherin and all the dorky kids in Ravenclaw? Don't the new students deserve to know that Gryffindor houses the stuck-up, cocky kids?
Really, I'm doing them quite a service! This year's song had humor, drama--hey, even forbidden love! (Lines 10-13 which deal with punishments for Gryffindor/Slytherin couples) The song teaches a good lesson about education in general (Line 22, where I state that the teachers are mindless buggers whose classes could be better run by bowls of Jell-O) and also reminds us all that life isn't perfect.
And yet Dumbledore can't seem to understand that to get this message accross, I NEED to cuss a little, insult a few people, and try to bite of the ear of the first child who tries me on! It's tradition to haze the new guys! Itzy-bitzy first years need to know the Sorting Hat is NOT to be messed with!
Stupid Dumbledore. Well, I'll write the type of song HE wants...one that is full of flowers, and lovey-dovey messages, and the bright side of eveything. But he can't keep me from biting that poor little girl or boy's ear! HAHAHAHHA!!!!!
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A/N: hee, hee, hee. I always wondered if the Sorting Hat's songs get censored. Well, now we know! If you liked this, click on my author name to read my other fics. So, join METMA, and help out a poor object like the SOrting Hat today!!! (only 2 sickles!!!) PLEASE REVIEW! if you don't, the Sorting Hat will come to your house, jump on your when you are asleep, and bite your EARS OFF! *manic laugher*
Disclaimer: BLeh, I hate disclaimers. Anyway, I don't own anything HP related, exept for METMA, cuz i made that up, *go me*
*******
I can't believe it. I CAN'T BELIEVE it! I spend my whole f*cking year writing that song, and Dumbledore says, "No, this is inappropriate. Please re-write it." After I poured my heart and soul into that song! I mean, come on, its not like I wrote anything that d*mn bad. I mean, we all KNOW Slytherins are lousy gits, so why not say so? And Hufflepuffs ARE full of sh*t, Headmaster, I don't care WHAT you say to try to convince me.
I do NOT deserve to be censored this way! This isn't Salem, or Transylvania! This is ENGLAND! I should have freedom of speech! After all, my life sure isn't perfect. Dumbledore's old storage closet doesn't see much action (except for the few times when McGonagall and Snape use it... o.O..) So, after most of the year carefully plotting a way to escape the closet (which has always ended in defeat, so far), I sit down for a couple of minutes to write a cutesy little school song. No one really listens to it except for a couple first years, so why SHOULDN'T I mention that all the sluts are in Slytherin and all the dorky kids in Ravenclaw? Don't the new students deserve to know that Gryffindor houses the stuck-up, cocky kids?
Really, I'm doing them quite a service! This year's song had humor, drama--hey, even forbidden love! (Lines 10-13 which deal with punishments for Gryffindor/Slytherin couples) The song teaches a good lesson about education in general (Line 22, where I state that the teachers are mindless buggers whose classes could be better run by bowls of Jell-O) and also reminds us all that life isn't perfect.
And yet Dumbledore can't seem to understand that to get this message accross, I NEED to cuss a little, insult a few people, and try to bite of the ear of the first child who tries me on! It's tradition to haze the new guys! Itzy-bitzy first years need to know the Sorting Hat is NOT to be messed with!
Stupid Dumbledore. Well, I'll write the type of song HE wants...one that is full of flowers, and lovey-dovey messages, and the bright side of eveything. But he can't keep me from biting that poor little girl or boy's ear! HAHAHAHHA!!!!!
******
A/N: hee, hee, hee. I always wondered if the Sorting Hat's songs get censored. Well, now we know! If you liked this, click on my author name to read my other fics. So, join METMA, and help out a poor object like the SOrting Hat today!!! (only 2 sickles!!!) PLEASE REVIEW! if you don't, the Sorting Hat will come to your house, jump on your when you are asleep, and bite your EARS OFF! *manic laugher*