BREAKING THE RULES
By: Lonesome Shipper
Email: cindy.vandenplas@skynet.be
Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully don't belong to me. They belong to 1013, FOX and Chris Carter. No copyright fringe is intended. I'm making no money out of this, so no need to sue me. I'm poor anyway and I promise to give them back after their Las Vegas trip. The Bellagio and little Paris really exist in Las Vegas and are the most beautiful hotels I have ever seen. Go and check them out.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: All the way up to season seven to be sure.
Summary: Scully takes a vacation to get away from Mulder, but she misses him. But then fate brings them together....
Classification: MSR. I am not a shipper for nothing.
Author's Note: I wrote this fluff while on holiday in the US and Canada over my summer holidays, but it took me this long to type it out. I hope you'll enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it on the plane. ;-p
Feedback: I won't beg. is, of course, extremely welcome and will be cherished. Don't know about flames though. :O)
Thank you: Huge thank you to Spyke Raven for the great beta-reading job. Thanks a lot.
Breaking the Rules by Lonesome Shipper
It was about time she took a break from being around Mulder. He was driving her nuts and she had to get away for a while. So she booked herself a nice trip and drove through California. But on the second day, she had already started thinking about him. Although she enjoyed her vacation and the scenery, she wanted to be with him. To put it plain and simple, she missed him. She missed him so much it ached. It was a pain going through body and soul. She missed him in the deepest of her heart.
When had she started depending on Mulder that much? Was it when he held her in that hospital in Arlington, when he stayed by her bedside when she was dying of cancer, when he looked for her for three months? Or when he almost kissed her in her hallway and ran all the way to Antarctica to save her? She didn't know when it had happened, but somewhere in between she had fallen in love with her best friend and partner.
It was a difficult situation. How do you handle the fact that you are in love with a colleague? Do you tell him or not?
What if she told him and he didn't feel the same? How embarrassing would that be? What if she didn't tell him? Would she blame herself for not knowing? Would she end up getting hurt, both emotionally and physically? She knew Mulder would never hurt her. Not on purpose anyway. He was nothing like Jack. She also knew there was a strong connection between them, but she didn't know the exact nature of it. Did he consider her as just his best friend or did his feeling run deeper? It was hard to tell what Mulder felt. He had never been someone to show his emotions openly. He wasn't exactly good at dealing with his feelings. And neither was she.
On the fifth day she tried to call him, but no one answered. Not at home, not at the office and not on his cell phone. It was as if he had vanished from the face of the earth. She was worried, very worried.
What if something had happened to him and they had tried to reach her? Her cell phone was at home and even her mom didn't know how to reach her. But if something was wrong with Mulder and Skinner couldn't reach her, he would call her mother. So she picked up the phone and dialed her number.
"Hello."
"Hi mom."
"Hi honey. How are you doing? How is your holiday?"
"Very nice, mom. The weather is great, people are very friendly and I
enjoy the scenery a lot. I'm glad to get away from things for a while."
"Where are you now?"
"I'm in San Diego and in two days I will be leaving for Las Vegas. I
heard they have some beautiful new hotels and I want to rest for a while."
"Nice idea, honey. You sound like you could use it."
"What do you mean, mom?"
"You sound very tired and isn't a vacation supposed to be relaxing?"
"I am relaxing, but you know how tiring driving can get."
"Have you heard from Fox?"
"Mulder, mom. No, I haven't. I left my cell phone home, remember?"
"The poor man doesn't even know how to reach you."
"What are you getting at mom?"
"I'm tired of seeing the two of you playing games."
"Mom!"
"Dana, it is so obvious the two of you are in love, but you're both too stubborn to do something about it."
"Mom, I..."
"Don't try to convince me of the contrary. I can see it in both your eyes."
"I don't know what you mean."
"Yeah yeah. By the way, you got a nice postcard from him."
"What is he up to?"
"Just like you, having a vacation in California. Maybe he followed you over there."
"Mom!"
"Sorry honey. Well, I hope you'll enjoy the rest of your trip."
"Bye mom."
"Bye honey."
Scully hung up the phone and fell back on the bed. California..... What the heck was Mulder doing in California? Scully wondered if he somehow knew she was in California... She didn't tell him where she was going, but with him you never knew. He was the type of agent who wouldn't think twice about using his FBI status fo find out where Scully was. Or maybe he had just been following her around all along. Scully shook her head and laughed to herself. She was just hoping he would do that. In a certain way it would prove he cared about her. In her deepest dreams, Mulder loved her as much as she loved him. But if he really did.... That was the one million dollar question.
She took a paper and began planning the next leg of her travels. On her way to Las Vegas, she would drive through Death Valley. Or maybe she would do that on her way back to San Francisco. Or even while staying in Las Vegas. She didn't know yet. She would stay two more days in beautiful San Diego. Then she would make a few stops on her way to Las Vegas. She had made reservations in five days, so she had some time left on her agenda. Maybe the Grand Canyon was an option. In Las Vegas, she would stay at a new hotel called the Bellagio. It was an Italian-style built hotel and she had heard they had the most spectacular water show. It apparently outstripped the Mirage's erupting volcano.
Scully spent her last two days in San Diego walking on the beach, shopping, swimming and resting. And of course she went to Sea World where she was lucky to have the chance to swim with a dolphin. When she left her hotel there, all she could think off was taking the next plane home. She needed to be with Mulder. Although she knew he wasn't in DC, being in the office would make her feel closer to him. Her ache for him grew every day. It was so painful that she felt like crying every minute of the day. Yet even though she wanted to be with Mulder, at this point in time, she didn't dare. She could probably guess what his next move would be, but not her own reactions. It was like fighting against something she couldn't control. You could guess what his next move would be - in some cases although - but you never knew about your emotions. If there was something dangerous for an FBI agent, it was being out of control of your emotions. If Scully were on a case right now, she would put herself and Mulder in danger. A woman in love is dangerous. An FBI agent in love is very dangerous. But if that same agent is in love with her partner, lives are at stake.
The day before reaching Las Vegas, Scully decided to drive through Death Valley. But it was closed due to the hot weather. Though she was disappointed, she turned around and took the Highway to Las Vegas. There would be another time. On her way over there she made a lot of stops, so she would arrive when all the light were on. She noticed the beautiful pink glow above the city from more than a hundred miles before actually reacing it. And once she got there, she was amazed. Driving down the Strip, she discovered a new way of life. People were relaxed and not stressed out. They were laughing and smiling. In a way it was true that Las Vegas was a playground for adults. And Scully would enjoy every single minute of it. She reached the Bellagio right in time to see the amazing water show. She also stared with an open mouth at Little Paris, the hotel that opened a few days ago. She had really wanted to stay there, but it was booked out months in advance.
Scully checked in at the Bellagio and was amazed at the beauty of the hotel. She walked through the garden of the classy five star hotel. Everything was perfect and still something was missing. All she wanted was to feel her partner's arms around her and never let him go again. She knew that she would break the FBI rules, but she didn't really care about that now. Nothing would stop them, not regulations, never rules. And like Mulder once said, "Why wait when it's true love?"
She sat down on a bench outside the hotel and was staring at the stars. It was a beautiful and warm, peaceful night in September. She noticed a falling star and made a wish. She wished that all her problems would go away. Then she closed her eyes and opened them a minute later. But nothing had changed. She still had this aching pain for Mulder. It seemed so unfair to her. Off all the men in the world, why did she fall in love with Mulder? Why didn't she fall in love with someone else? Why wasn't there a love button you could switch on and off? So many questions, but not one answer. If answers to your questions could make you wiser, these answers would solve a lot of trouble and heart ache.Her heart belonged to Mulder and it hurt like never before.
She was staring at the pool in front of her and was almost crying. She didn't hear someone coming up to her. Her eyes were clouded with tears, when she heard a very familiar voice.
"Is this seat taken?"
She looked up and stared right into the comforting eyes of Mulder. She could read how concerned he was.
"Scully, are you okay?"
Mulder sat down next to her and took her hand in his. She pulled away violently.
"Don't touch me, Mulder."
Mulder looked at her, shaken and surprised. He moved uncomfortably on the bench and stared at Scully.
"Scully, I... What's wrong? Did I do something?"
Then he made a move he never should have. He laid is hand on her shoulder and started making gentle circles with his thumb. At that exact moment, she exploded. She punched his arm away and stood up. Here eyes shot fire. Before Mulder could react, she was hitting him. Mulder stood and tried to calm her down, but he couldn't. And then she started screaming at him.
"I said not to touch me, Mulder! But like always, you only think about yourself! You are a selfish bastard Mulder, and I hate you. So why don't you just get lost and stay the hell out of my life!!!! I'll feel much better!"
Meanwhile, Mulder had come to stand in front of her. With one last hard push, she moved him aside. She was so hurt and mad, that she was utterly out of control. She didn't realize the strength she possessed. Mulder fell flat on his back on the grass and Scully walked off. He felt an aching pain in his back and noticed he had fallen in a bed of roses. He tried to get up and follow her, but he couldn't move. Someone passing by helped him up and he went looking for Scully.
Scully was standing on the strip and was looking at the water and music show in front of the hotel. Tears were streaming down her face and she didn't try to hold them back. She didn't care if someone saw them. As far as she was concerned, the whole world could see them. The harder she tried to fight them, the harder she cried. She was leaning against the fence staring at the show, when she felt two strong arms encircling her waist. She turned around and caught a glimpse of Mulder, before he pulled her into a tight hug. She had noticed the tears in his eyes and turned around in his embrace. She laid her arms on his back, and he jumped.
"I'm so sorry Mulder, I don't know what got into me."
"Shhh, it's okay."
Mulder pulled her back into his arms and gently kissed the top of her head. He was whispering comforting words to her and she relaxed in his arms.
After a few minutes, he let her go and gently took her hand. He led her away from the crowded strip and walked back to the garden. They sat down on a bench and Mulder looked at her with that serious look on his face.
"I think we need to talk, Scully. About what happened back there. About what you said."
"I didn't mean what I said, Mulder. I'm sorry."
"I know you are. But I think there are some unspoken things between us. And I think we should talk about them before one of us ends up really hurt. Do you know what I mean?"
"I do know, Mulder, but I'm not much of a talker. I've never been. You should realize that by now."
"I do realize that and I accept it. That's why I'll be doing all the talking and you'll just need to listen. If that's okay with you?"
"That'll be just fine with me. Go ahead and I'll be all ears."
She smiled at him and he smiled back. He turned so that he was facing her and took her little hands between his. He made gentle circles on her palm and started talking.
"I don't know what happened back there, but you scared the shit out of me. I'm not sure if I'm correct, but I think I might have an idea about what's going on. You feel there is something between us and you don't know what. You are scared about what is going to happen next and you want to get as far away from me as you can. Well, that's not going to happen. I'm not getting out of your life. As hard as you may try, I'm not going anywhere. I do know how you feel. And I have feelings for you too. I just don't know where they fit in. I have no idea how to handle this. I do care a lot about you, but I don't know where I'm going with my life. And as long as I don't know that, I'm not going to do something I might regret for the rest of my life. I don't want to hurt you and I am scared you will end up hurt. I always seem to hurt people I care about the most."
"You do care about me, don't you?"
"More than you'll ever know. But I'm scared of doing something about it, because everyone and everything seems to be against us. Including the rules."
"I know, Mulder, but sometimes I just wanna hold you and never let you go again."
"Why don't you just hold me then?"
She started laughing out loud and so did Mulder. He pulled her into his arms and she held him very tight. She could smell his very manly perfume and the smell that was very Mulder-like. She caressed his back and she could feel him pull away when she touched a sore spot. they stayed like that for a while. Mulder made lazy circles on Scully's back and she just enjoyed the feeling of him. After a while she let him go and hand in hand they walked back to the lobby. Mulder walked Scully to her room and waited until she opened the door.
"You wanna come in for a minute, Mulder?"
"I don't know, Scully. We should take things slowly."
"It's not like you've never been in my room before."
"Yeah."
Scully moved aside and Mulder got in. He sat down on the bed and sighed deeply.
"What's wrong, Mulder?"
"Nothing. It's just that I don't know where I'm standing anymore and I am so scared to hurt you. I care more about you than I've ever cared for anyone before in my life. My feelings for you are so deep, but I can't tell if I'm in love with you. And that's so darn frustrating."
"That's okay, Mulder. We'll take things as they come and see what happens. If you're not sure about how you feel, we'll just stay friends for moment."
"But is that okay with you, Scully? I mean...."
"That'll be fine, Mulder. You know how I feel and I know how you feel. And I do accept that. I feel much better now that I know. And remember that I'm here for you."
"Thanks, Scully. You're the greatest."
Mulder gently laid his hand on her cheek and caressed her. She smiled sweetly at him and he tenderly kissed her on the forehead. Scully looked him deep in the eyes.
"Do you have something planned for tomorrow, Mulder."?
"I think I'll just stay by the pool and do some thinking. Why?"
"I'm gonna drive through Death Valley. Care to join me?"
"Thanks Scully, but I'd rather pass. I need to do some thinking."
"Okay. You're right, Mulder. We both have a lot of thinking to do."
"I'm always right."
"Don't push your luck."
She smiled at him and their eyes locked. For a few seconds, they just stared at each other. But Mulder was being smart and broke the contact. He got up and walked to the door.
"I should be going, Scully."
"Sure. Goodnight."
"Night, Mulder. And I'll see you tomorrow night."
"Okay."
Mulder kissed the top of her head and left the room. Scully smiled to herself and got ready for bed. She took a shower, put her pj's on and climbed in the soft bed. A long day awaited her.
The next morning she left very early. She didn't want to reach Death Valley at noon. It seemed like it was going to be another hot day. Luckily, Death Valley would be open. She had called beforehand just to make sure. When she reached the entrance it was only 8.30. She drove in and enjoyed the scenery. There was not much to see, but it was very special. There weren't a lot of people out today. For some of them it was too hot. Scully drove slowly, enjoying the sun and the loneliness. From time to time she enjoyed the peace of nature. Although she would have liked it much more if Mulder had come along. But he had been right. They needed some time to think. Scully made a few stops and noticed how it got hotter and hotter. By noon she had reached Badwater and the heat was almost unbearable. It seemed like she was alone out there. She stayed there for a few minutes, sitting on a rock and watching the desert.
She walked back and started the car. Nothing. She tried again, but still nothing. The engine seemed to be dead. Scully was scared and started to panic. Not because her car didn't start, but because she hadn't seen another human being in over an hour. She got out of the car, took her bottle of water and sat down in the shades. The sweat was running down her entire body and she wished she could take her clothes off and jump in some cold water.
An hour later, she was still sitting there. She doubted anyone would find her. She started to doze off from the heat. Her water supply was shrinking and she tried to drink less to save some. But she knew she would soon suffer from dehydration. And two hours later she fainted...
At 8 pm, Mulder started to worry. Scully had told him she would be back around six. He had had a bad feeling about it all day long. As if something bad was going to happen to her. At 11 pm he warned to LVPD. And he knew what they were going to tell him: They couldn't do anything if she wasn't missing for 24 hours. They also told him that Death Valley had been closed shortly after sunrise and no one had gone in.The heat would have been too dangerous.
At midnight he took his car and drove to Death Valley. It had cooled down a little and the park had been reopened. It was never closed at night anyway. And even if it had been closed, Mulder would have gone in. Mulder drove through the park as fast as he could. He had to make some decisions on his way there and with a little luck he drove to Badwater. After a few miles, he caught sight of an abandoned car in his headlights. He stopped next to the car and inspected it with his flashlight. He was shocked to discover Scully's lifeless body. Her heartbeat had slowed down and she was burning. He took water out of his trunk and tried to cool her down. She didn't react and Mulder knew he had to get her to hospital as soon as possible. He carefully picked her up and laid her down on the backseat of his car. He wet his shirt and laid it on her forehead to make her body temperature drop. He took off in a hurry and drove to the nearest hospital. He had called them and when he arrived there, they were waiting for him. He left her in the caring hands of the doctors and waited.
Mulder sat down in the waiting room and started thinking about Scully. He realized how much she really meant to him. He had told her he cared a lot about her, but now that he could lose her, he realized that he was lying. Lying to himself and lying to Scully. Because he loved her. The thougth of seeing her die scared the hell out of him. He loved her more than himself. He was madly in love with her. And it was so stupid that this had to happen to make him realize it. He hoped that he would be able to tell her very soon. And the sooner it was, the better it would be for the both of them. Mulder was feeling guilty because he let her go alone and because he had been unable to protect her. Again. He had broken her trust by not telling how he really felt. If he had told her last night, she wouldn't be here fighting for her life.
He was softly snoring when the doctor came in and woke him up.
"Agent Mulder?"
"How is she doing?"
"She'll be fine. She lost a lot of fluids and is suffering from severe dehydration. We put her on an IV to get the fluids back to normal. If all goes as planned, in a few hours this will all be a bad memory. She was lucky you found her when you did. A few more hours and she might not have made it."
"Can I see her?"
"She's asleep, but feel free to go and see her.
"Thanks doctor."
Mulder left the doctor and went to Scully's room. She was still sound asleep, but he knew she would wake up when she felt him. He took a chair, sat down next to her bed and took her hand in his. He could feel how her body temperature had dropped. He let out a huge sigh and just looked at her.
He was drifting off to sleep when he felt Scully stir and her hand move. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. He sat down on the side of the bed and traced her forehead with his finger. He put his hand on her cheek and traced her mouth with his finger. She looked him straight in the eyes and he saw that she was on the verge of crying.
"Thank you, Mulder. You saved my life."
"Don't ever do that to me again. You scared me to death."
"Sorry, I..."
"Don't Scully, just listen to me. This made me realize how much I love you and that I couldn't live another minute without you. I'm in love with you and nothing could ever change that.
Tears were falling down Scully's cheeks and Mulder wiped them away. He looked her tenderly in the eyes.
"I love you too, Mulder."
"I know."
For the first time their lips met. It was a tender and gentle kiss, full of future promises.
The End.
By: Lonesome Shipper
Email: cindy.vandenplas@skynet.be
Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully don't belong to me. They belong to 1013, FOX and Chris Carter. No copyright fringe is intended. I'm making no money out of this, so no need to sue me. I'm poor anyway and I promise to give them back after their Las Vegas trip. The Bellagio and little Paris really exist in Las Vegas and are the most beautiful hotels I have ever seen. Go and check them out.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: All the way up to season seven to be sure.
Summary: Scully takes a vacation to get away from Mulder, but she misses him. But then fate brings them together....
Classification: MSR. I am not a shipper for nothing.
Author's Note: I wrote this fluff while on holiday in the US and Canada over my summer holidays, but it took me this long to type it out. I hope you'll enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it on the plane. ;-p
Feedback: I won't beg. is, of course, extremely welcome and will be cherished. Don't know about flames though. :O)
Thank you: Huge thank you to Spyke Raven for the great beta-reading job. Thanks a lot.
Breaking the Rules by Lonesome Shipper
It was about time she took a break from being around Mulder. He was driving her nuts and she had to get away for a while. So she booked herself a nice trip and drove through California. But on the second day, she had already started thinking about him. Although she enjoyed her vacation and the scenery, she wanted to be with him. To put it plain and simple, she missed him. She missed him so much it ached. It was a pain going through body and soul. She missed him in the deepest of her heart.
When had she started depending on Mulder that much? Was it when he held her in that hospital in Arlington, when he stayed by her bedside when she was dying of cancer, when he looked for her for three months? Or when he almost kissed her in her hallway and ran all the way to Antarctica to save her? She didn't know when it had happened, but somewhere in between she had fallen in love with her best friend and partner.
It was a difficult situation. How do you handle the fact that you are in love with a colleague? Do you tell him or not?
What if she told him and he didn't feel the same? How embarrassing would that be? What if she didn't tell him? Would she blame herself for not knowing? Would she end up getting hurt, both emotionally and physically? She knew Mulder would never hurt her. Not on purpose anyway. He was nothing like Jack. She also knew there was a strong connection between them, but she didn't know the exact nature of it. Did he consider her as just his best friend or did his feeling run deeper? It was hard to tell what Mulder felt. He had never been someone to show his emotions openly. He wasn't exactly good at dealing with his feelings. And neither was she.
On the fifth day she tried to call him, but no one answered. Not at home, not at the office and not on his cell phone. It was as if he had vanished from the face of the earth. She was worried, very worried.
What if something had happened to him and they had tried to reach her? Her cell phone was at home and even her mom didn't know how to reach her. But if something was wrong with Mulder and Skinner couldn't reach her, he would call her mother. So she picked up the phone and dialed her number.
"Hello."
"Hi mom."
"Hi honey. How are you doing? How is your holiday?"
"Very nice, mom. The weather is great, people are very friendly and I
enjoy the scenery a lot. I'm glad to get away from things for a while."
"Where are you now?"
"I'm in San Diego and in two days I will be leaving for Las Vegas. I
heard they have some beautiful new hotels and I want to rest for a while."
"Nice idea, honey. You sound like you could use it."
"What do you mean, mom?"
"You sound very tired and isn't a vacation supposed to be relaxing?"
"I am relaxing, but you know how tiring driving can get."
"Have you heard from Fox?"
"Mulder, mom. No, I haven't. I left my cell phone home, remember?"
"The poor man doesn't even know how to reach you."
"What are you getting at mom?"
"I'm tired of seeing the two of you playing games."
"Mom!"
"Dana, it is so obvious the two of you are in love, but you're both too stubborn to do something about it."
"Mom, I..."
"Don't try to convince me of the contrary. I can see it in both your eyes."
"I don't know what you mean."
"Yeah yeah. By the way, you got a nice postcard from him."
"What is he up to?"
"Just like you, having a vacation in California. Maybe he followed you over there."
"Mom!"
"Sorry honey. Well, I hope you'll enjoy the rest of your trip."
"Bye mom."
"Bye honey."
Scully hung up the phone and fell back on the bed. California..... What the heck was Mulder doing in California? Scully wondered if he somehow knew she was in California... She didn't tell him where she was going, but with him you never knew. He was the type of agent who wouldn't think twice about using his FBI status fo find out where Scully was. Or maybe he had just been following her around all along. Scully shook her head and laughed to herself. She was just hoping he would do that. In a certain way it would prove he cared about her. In her deepest dreams, Mulder loved her as much as she loved him. But if he really did.... That was the one million dollar question.
She took a paper and began planning the next leg of her travels. On her way to Las Vegas, she would drive through Death Valley. Or maybe she would do that on her way back to San Francisco. Or even while staying in Las Vegas. She didn't know yet. She would stay two more days in beautiful San Diego. Then she would make a few stops on her way to Las Vegas. She had made reservations in five days, so she had some time left on her agenda. Maybe the Grand Canyon was an option. In Las Vegas, she would stay at a new hotel called the Bellagio. It was an Italian-style built hotel and she had heard they had the most spectacular water show. It apparently outstripped the Mirage's erupting volcano.
Scully spent her last two days in San Diego walking on the beach, shopping, swimming and resting. And of course she went to Sea World where she was lucky to have the chance to swim with a dolphin. When she left her hotel there, all she could think off was taking the next plane home. She needed to be with Mulder. Although she knew he wasn't in DC, being in the office would make her feel closer to him. Her ache for him grew every day. It was so painful that she felt like crying every minute of the day. Yet even though she wanted to be with Mulder, at this point in time, she didn't dare. She could probably guess what his next move would be, but not her own reactions. It was like fighting against something she couldn't control. You could guess what his next move would be - in some cases although - but you never knew about your emotions. If there was something dangerous for an FBI agent, it was being out of control of your emotions. If Scully were on a case right now, she would put herself and Mulder in danger. A woman in love is dangerous. An FBI agent in love is very dangerous. But if that same agent is in love with her partner, lives are at stake.
The day before reaching Las Vegas, Scully decided to drive through Death Valley. But it was closed due to the hot weather. Though she was disappointed, she turned around and took the Highway to Las Vegas. There would be another time. On her way over there she made a lot of stops, so she would arrive when all the light were on. She noticed the beautiful pink glow above the city from more than a hundred miles before actually reacing it. And once she got there, she was amazed. Driving down the Strip, she discovered a new way of life. People were relaxed and not stressed out. They were laughing and smiling. In a way it was true that Las Vegas was a playground for adults. And Scully would enjoy every single minute of it. She reached the Bellagio right in time to see the amazing water show. She also stared with an open mouth at Little Paris, the hotel that opened a few days ago. She had really wanted to stay there, but it was booked out months in advance.
Scully checked in at the Bellagio and was amazed at the beauty of the hotel. She walked through the garden of the classy five star hotel. Everything was perfect and still something was missing. All she wanted was to feel her partner's arms around her and never let him go again. She knew that she would break the FBI rules, but she didn't really care about that now. Nothing would stop them, not regulations, never rules. And like Mulder once said, "Why wait when it's true love?"
She sat down on a bench outside the hotel and was staring at the stars. It was a beautiful and warm, peaceful night in September. She noticed a falling star and made a wish. She wished that all her problems would go away. Then she closed her eyes and opened them a minute later. But nothing had changed. She still had this aching pain for Mulder. It seemed so unfair to her. Off all the men in the world, why did she fall in love with Mulder? Why didn't she fall in love with someone else? Why wasn't there a love button you could switch on and off? So many questions, but not one answer. If answers to your questions could make you wiser, these answers would solve a lot of trouble and heart ache.Her heart belonged to Mulder and it hurt like never before.
She was staring at the pool in front of her and was almost crying. She didn't hear someone coming up to her. Her eyes were clouded with tears, when she heard a very familiar voice.
"Is this seat taken?"
She looked up and stared right into the comforting eyes of Mulder. She could read how concerned he was.
"Scully, are you okay?"
Mulder sat down next to her and took her hand in his. She pulled away violently.
"Don't touch me, Mulder."
Mulder looked at her, shaken and surprised. He moved uncomfortably on the bench and stared at Scully.
"Scully, I... What's wrong? Did I do something?"
Then he made a move he never should have. He laid is hand on her shoulder and started making gentle circles with his thumb. At that exact moment, she exploded. She punched his arm away and stood up. Here eyes shot fire. Before Mulder could react, she was hitting him. Mulder stood and tried to calm her down, but he couldn't. And then she started screaming at him.
"I said not to touch me, Mulder! But like always, you only think about yourself! You are a selfish bastard Mulder, and I hate you. So why don't you just get lost and stay the hell out of my life!!!! I'll feel much better!"
Meanwhile, Mulder had come to stand in front of her. With one last hard push, she moved him aside. She was so hurt and mad, that she was utterly out of control. She didn't realize the strength she possessed. Mulder fell flat on his back on the grass and Scully walked off. He felt an aching pain in his back and noticed he had fallen in a bed of roses. He tried to get up and follow her, but he couldn't move. Someone passing by helped him up and he went looking for Scully.
Scully was standing on the strip and was looking at the water and music show in front of the hotel. Tears were streaming down her face and she didn't try to hold them back. She didn't care if someone saw them. As far as she was concerned, the whole world could see them. The harder she tried to fight them, the harder she cried. She was leaning against the fence staring at the show, when she felt two strong arms encircling her waist. She turned around and caught a glimpse of Mulder, before he pulled her into a tight hug. She had noticed the tears in his eyes and turned around in his embrace. She laid her arms on his back, and he jumped.
"I'm so sorry Mulder, I don't know what got into me."
"Shhh, it's okay."
Mulder pulled her back into his arms and gently kissed the top of her head. He was whispering comforting words to her and she relaxed in his arms.
After a few minutes, he let her go and gently took her hand. He led her away from the crowded strip and walked back to the garden. They sat down on a bench and Mulder looked at her with that serious look on his face.
"I think we need to talk, Scully. About what happened back there. About what you said."
"I didn't mean what I said, Mulder. I'm sorry."
"I know you are. But I think there are some unspoken things between us. And I think we should talk about them before one of us ends up really hurt. Do you know what I mean?"
"I do know, Mulder, but I'm not much of a talker. I've never been. You should realize that by now."
"I do realize that and I accept it. That's why I'll be doing all the talking and you'll just need to listen. If that's okay with you?"
"That'll be just fine with me. Go ahead and I'll be all ears."
She smiled at him and he smiled back. He turned so that he was facing her and took her little hands between his. He made gentle circles on her palm and started talking.
"I don't know what happened back there, but you scared the shit out of me. I'm not sure if I'm correct, but I think I might have an idea about what's going on. You feel there is something between us and you don't know what. You are scared about what is going to happen next and you want to get as far away from me as you can. Well, that's not going to happen. I'm not getting out of your life. As hard as you may try, I'm not going anywhere. I do know how you feel. And I have feelings for you too. I just don't know where they fit in. I have no idea how to handle this. I do care a lot about you, but I don't know where I'm going with my life. And as long as I don't know that, I'm not going to do something I might regret for the rest of my life. I don't want to hurt you and I am scared you will end up hurt. I always seem to hurt people I care about the most."
"You do care about me, don't you?"
"More than you'll ever know. But I'm scared of doing something about it, because everyone and everything seems to be against us. Including the rules."
"I know, Mulder, but sometimes I just wanna hold you and never let you go again."
"Why don't you just hold me then?"
She started laughing out loud and so did Mulder. He pulled her into his arms and she held him very tight. She could smell his very manly perfume and the smell that was very Mulder-like. She caressed his back and she could feel him pull away when she touched a sore spot. they stayed like that for a while. Mulder made lazy circles on Scully's back and she just enjoyed the feeling of him. After a while she let him go and hand in hand they walked back to the lobby. Mulder walked Scully to her room and waited until she opened the door.
"You wanna come in for a minute, Mulder?"
"I don't know, Scully. We should take things slowly."
"It's not like you've never been in my room before."
"Yeah."
Scully moved aside and Mulder got in. He sat down on the bed and sighed deeply.
"What's wrong, Mulder?"
"Nothing. It's just that I don't know where I'm standing anymore and I am so scared to hurt you. I care more about you than I've ever cared for anyone before in my life. My feelings for you are so deep, but I can't tell if I'm in love with you. And that's so darn frustrating."
"That's okay, Mulder. We'll take things as they come and see what happens. If you're not sure about how you feel, we'll just stay friends for moment."
"But is that okay with you, Scully? I mean...."
"That'll be fine, Mulder. You know how I feel and I know how you feel. And I do accept that. I feel much better now that I know. And remember that I'm here for you."
"Thanks, Scully. You're the greatest."
Mulder gently laid his hand on her cheek and caressed her. She smiled sweetly at him and he tenderly kissed her on the forehead. Scully looked him deep in the eyes.
"Do you have something planned for tomorrow, Mulder."?
"I think I'll just stay by the pool and do some thinking. Why?"
"I'm gonna drive through Death Valley. Care to join me?"
"Thanks Scully, but I'd rather pass. I need to do some thinking."
"Okay. You're right, Mulder. We both have a lot of thinking to do."
"I'm always right."
"Don't push your luck."
She smiled at him and their eyes locked. For a few seconds, they just stared at each other. But Mulder was being smart and broke the contact. He got up and walked to the door.
"I should be going, Scully."
"Sure. Goodnight."
"Night, Mulder. And I'll see you tomorrow night."
"Okay."
Mulder kissed the top of her head and left the room. Scully smiled to herself and got ready for bed. She took a shower, put her pj's on and climbed in the soft bed. A long day awaited her.
The next morning she left very early. She didn't want to reach Death Valley at noon. It seemed like it was going to be another hot day. Luckily, Death Valley would be open. She had called beforehand just to make sure. When she reached the entrance it was only 8.30. She drove in and enjoyed the scenery. There was not much to see, but it was very special. There weren't a lot of people out today. For some of them it was too hot. Scully drove slowly, enjoying the sun and the loneliness. From time to time she enjoyed the peace of nature. Although she would have liked it much more if Mulder had come along. But he had been right. They needed some time to think. Scully made a few stops and noticed how it got hotter and hotter. By noon she had reached Badwater and the heat was almost unbearable. It seemed like she was alone out there. She stayed there for a few minutes, sitting on a rock and watching the desert.
She walked back and started the car. Nothing. She tried again, but still nothing. The engine seemed to be dead. Scully was scared and started to panic. Not because her car didn't start, but because she hadn't seen another human being in over an hour. She got out of the car, took her bottle of water and sat down in the shades. The sweat was running down her entire body and she wished she could take her clothes off and jump in some cold water.
An hour later, she was still sitting there. She doubted anyone would find her. She started to doze off from the heat. Her water supply was shrinking and she tried to drink less to save some. But she knew she would soon suffer from dehydration. And two hours later she fainted...
At 8 pm, Mulder started to worry. Scully had told him she would be back around six. He had had a bad feeling about it all day long. As if something bad was going to happen to her. At 11 pm he warned to LVPD. And he knew what they were going to tell him: They couldn't do anything if she wasn't missing for 24 hours. They also told him that Death Valley had been closed shortly after sunrise and no one had gone in.The heat would have been too dangerous.
At midnight he took his car and drove to Death Valley. It had cooled down a little and the park had been reopened. It was never closed at night anyway. And even if it had been closed, Mulder would have gone in. Mulder drove through the park as fast as he could. He had to make some decisions on his way there and with a little luck he drove to Badwater. After a few miles, he caught sight of an abandoned car in his headlights. He stopped next to the car and inspected it with his flashlight. He was shocked to discover Scully's lifeless body. Her heartbeat had slowed down and she was burning. He took water out of his trunk and tried to cool her down. She didn't react and Mulder knew he had to get her to hospital as soon as possible. He carefully picked her up and laid her down on the backseat of his car. He wet his shirt and laid it on her forehead to make her body temperature drop. He took off in a hurry and drove to the nearest hospital. He had called them and when he arrived there, they were waiting for him. He left her in the caring hands of the doctors and waited.
Mulder sat down in the waiting room and started thinking about Scully. He realized how much she really meant to him. He had told her he cared a lot about her, but now that he could lose her, he realized that he was lying. Lying to himself and lying to Scully. Because he loved her. The thougth of seeing her die scared the hell out of him. He loved her more than himself. He was madly in love with her. And it was so stupid that this had to happen to make him realize it. He hoped that he would be able to tell her very soon. And the sooner it was, the better it would be for the both of them. Mulder was feeling guilty because he let her go alone and because he had been unable to protect her. Again. He had broken her trust by not telling how he really felt. If he had told her last night, she wouldn't be here fighting for her life.
He was softly snoring when the doctor came in and woke him up.
"Agent Mulder?"
"How is she doing?"
"She'll be fine. She lost a lot of fluids and is suffering from severe dehydration. We put her on an IV to get the fluids back to normal. If all goes as planned, in a few hours this will all be a bad memory. She was lucky you found her when you did. A few more hours and she might not have made it."
"Can I see her?"
"She's asleep, but feel free to go and see her.
"Thanks doctor."
Mulder left the doctor and went to Scully's room. She was still sound asleep, but he knew she would wake up when she felt him. He took a chair, sat down next to her bed and took her hand in his. He could feel how her body temperature had dropped. He let out a huge sigh and just looked at her.
He was drifting off to sleep when he felt Scully stir and her hand move. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. He sat down on the side of the bed and traced her forehead with his finger. He put his hand on her cheek and traced her mouth with his finger. She looked him straight in the eyes and he saw that she was on the verge of crying.
"Thank you, Mulder. You saved my life."
"Don't ever do that to me again. You scared me to death."
"Sorry, I..."
"Don't Scully, just listen to me. This made me realize how much I love you and that I couldn't live another minute without you. I'm in love with you and nothing could ever change that.
Tears were falling down Scully's cheeks and Mulder wiped them away. He looked her tenderly in the eyes.
"I love you too, Mulder."
"I know."
For the first time their lips met. It was a tender and gentle kiss, full of future promises.
The End.