Funny little one-shot! Second fanfiction. My first was "Mechanic Romance"! I don't know, I just love one-shots.

I do not own The Hardy Boys or Nancy Drew. (cries in a corner)

Live! Laugh! Love! Review!

"We still on for my place?"

"Sure thing," Nancy Drew answered Joe Hardy through the phone, turning right at the stoplight and accelerating as fast as she could. She could see the black minivan gaining on her. "I'm not going to let a little chase change that. And quit talking so slick!" she scolded halfheartedly, pulling onto a dirt road and flooring it.

"Sor-ry," Joe huffed in mock offense. She heard his voice slightly quieter, addressing Frank. "Bro, make her stop. Your girlfriend's dissing me."

"Girlfriend?!" Nancy yelled, making a sharp right, her tires skidding then righting themselves. Distantly she heard Frank shouting the same thing. She smiled. Now Joe would get it. "Look, I'll let Frank kill you for me, okay? We're not together, even though we're not with our former… interests anymore."

"CAN you feel the LOVE toniiiiight…" Joe sang dramatically in response. Nancy's lid almost blew.

"FRANK! How much coffee did you GIVE him?!" she screamed into the phone. Suddenly, she slowed down on the dirt road, looking into her rearview mirror. Nope, she hadn't lost the van. Sighing, she shook her head. Well, the dude had asked for it.

She barely heard Frank's answer as she gunned it, her tires kicking up dirt and rocks. One rock shattered her pursuer's windshield. And now he was entrapped in a cloud of dust. Nancy grinned. Perfect.

"Hey guys, I gotta go. I have an arrest to make."

"Be careful!" she heard Frank in the background.

Hanging up, she jumped out of her car, holding her shirt over her nose and mouth and racing through the dust cloud to the stopped vehicle. Sliding open the left backseat door, she got her gun and handcuffs, supplied by Joe, ready. This cat burglar was about to get a big surprise.

After her case closed, Nancy drove over to Frank and Joe's hotel. They were visiting River Heights and had arrived yesterday.

In a few minutes she was in their room, catching up. Eventually the conversation somehow (probably because of Joe) turned to middle school/high school crushes.

"Let's see," Joe took a sip of his Coke and began counting on his fingers. "There was Trisha Lottman…"

"I don't remember that name," Frank mumbled, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. Nancy had to almost kick herself when she started thinking about how cute that looked. Get a hold of yourself, Drew.

"The cheer captain?"

Frank still looked doubtful.

Joe sighed. "With the Barbie obsession? Remember? I drew the line when she started calling me 'Ken'. "

Nancy laughed. She watched Frank's eyes widen as he choked on his Sprite, which induced a fit of coughing. Joe then gave him an exaggerated clap on the back, almost sending the agonizing Frank headfirst into the kitchenette countertop.

Recovering, Frank stood and glared at Joe. Nancy watched in amused sympathy.

"Oh, soda up the nose?" Joe asked innocently, ducking immediately afterwards to avoid getting slugged. Then he made a swipe at his older brother.

"Hey, no cat-fighting," Nancy scolded, grinning. "I'm still here, you know."

Both of the Hardys snapped back to normal. "Now, where were we?" Joe mused. "Oh yeah. And then in my first year of highschool there was Angela Chandler. Now her I really liked."

"Until she turned out to be in a drug dealing ring."

"Eh, I still say she might have been framed."

"Even after she pulled the gun on you?"

"I can chalk it up to lots mental stress. And her teen hormones. Almost."

Sighing, Frank shook his head. "And then a year later you were in love with Heather Bramblette."

"Unforgettable," Joe confirmed with a nod, "As she convinced me to go on a date with her in a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant. Which her uncle, a burglar and one of our suspects, owned. And I might add, he kidnapped me there. Interrupted our date, too."

Nancy gave Joe an odd look. "You walked into that like a lamb. Didn't anything click on the way to your date with your suspect's niece in the suspect's run-down restaurant?"

"Of course not," Frank snorted. "He didn't have me to give him advice and brains. I was working a case with you in River Heights at the time, remember?"

"Wasn't that the one where you got your tie stuck in a blender?"

"I try not to remember that."

Joe burst out laughing, and Frank gave him an exasperated look. "Little brother, I suggest you can it. Because right now you're getting a serious health risk."

"Can it? No way! Wait till I tell Biff about this."

"You do, and I'll tell him about the time two nights ago when you went sleepwalking into my room and told me you wanted to learn the colors of the rainbow!"

By now Nancy was laughing so hard that she could barely breathe. "Can we change the subject?" she finally gasped out, brushing a strand of strawberry blonde hair from her face.

Frank nodded emphatically. "Let's. How about…"

"Injuries!" Joe interjected suddenly. "You know, the different injuries we've had over the years?"

Nancy sighed. "This is pathetic. Sure."

"Okay," Joe started, "well, when I was thirteen I got hit by a car… dislocated my thumb."

Frank rolled his eyes. "You don't say?"

"When I was fifteen I fell off a bridge," Nancy reminisced. "Good thing there was water below. But, I did end up getting hypothermia."

"What is it with you and falling?" Joe asked, shaking his head.

"What is it with you and getting kidnapped?" Nancy retorted.

"Let's see," Frank interrupted the two, thinking. "I got buried alive when I was… what, sixteen?"

"Nice one, Hardy." Nancy teased.

"Hey, I survived!"

"And we're so glad," Joe said over-sweetly.

Frank pushed him.

"I think we've all been in a few car wrecks," Nancy mused.

"And we've been knocked out uncountable times," Frank nodded.

"That doesn't count," Joe laughed. "It's too regular for us to be a big 'injury'!"

Frank and Nancy grinned. "Definitely," they said at the same time. Nancy blushed. Dang it. Why did they do that so much?

They lapsed into silence for a few moments. "I'm hungry," Joe suddenly announced.

"Fresh tomatoes on the counter," Frank answered, his face carefully expressionless. Joe hated tomatoes, as was shown by the face his younger brother immediately made. Nancy, however, perked up at the words.

"Ooh, can I have one?" she asked eagerly. "I love tomatoes."

"Sure Nance!" Joe beamed, happy to get rid of one. He quickly handed one to her and she bit into it.

Her face took one an odd expression. Nancy swallowed her bite and turned to them. "You're not going to believe this. I just cut my mouth."

"On a tomato?" Frank asked incredulously.

"Apparently."

"Wow, talent," Joe remarked. "How on earth did you manage to do that?"

"The edge of the tomato skin pulled tight. No biggie. It just stings."

Suddenly Joe gave a slow, steadily growing smile, somewhat like the Grinch. "Hey Frank, why don't you kiss it and make it better?"

Frank and Nancy whirled on him in unison. "JOE!"