A/N - This is my first iCarly fanfic...enjoy.
And I do not own iCarly (sadly).

20 Reasons

Sam held the laptop to her chest. "Thanks for the birthday present, Freddork." She smiles brightly and punches me in the arm…hard.

"Welcome, Sam." I replies, rubbing my arm and giving her a smile. "If you need any help setting it up I am willing to help you."

"I will." She said slowly, opening the computer and clicking furiously. I smiled. I had gotten it for her because I knew that she didn't have a lot of nice things…and I wanted her to stop getting bacon grease on my keyboard.

"Where is Carly with our smoothies?" Freddie asked after a few minutes of near silence—Sam kept typing away, the sound of the keys almost soothing.

Sam's head snapped up. "I don't know-." She paused with a weird look on her face. "Freddie? Why didn't you wait until Carly was here to give this to me?"

"Uh…I just wanted to give it to you and couldn't wait." I explained in a tumbled rush and Sam raised an eyebrow.

"Don't lie, Fredweird." Sam said, peeking over the top of the computer. The only thing that was visible was the blond top of her head and her bright blue eyes. I felt a butterfly in my stomach but it quickly faded and so I figured it was all my imagination.

"I just wanted to give it you alone." I replied, trying to look distracted as I said it by picking at my shoelaces. When I glanced back up, Sam was eyeing me strangely. "And I just thought this was a good time."

"Cool. I guess." She said, sounding preoccupied. She reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Pass me a soda." She asked, glancing up at me. I nodded and turned, grabbing a can of pepi-cola from the mini-fridge that Spencer picked up for Carly at the junkyard. It was scorched on one side from where Spence had tried to fix it up. Finally I took over the project.

I held it out to Sam and she glared at me. "Open it?" She snapped. I sighed and started to pull up the tab but it appeared to be stuck. I kept tugging, not realizing that I was essentially shaking the can. Finally I got it open and it started spraying everywhere. "Benson!" Sam shrieked, setting the computer aside and standing. Her entire front is coated in soda. I grimaced.

"Sorry." I hurried to my feet, grabbing some napkins for her but she just knocked them out of my grip. "Sam I said I was-."

Next thing I knew I was on the ground, covering my face with my arms. I wait until she stops pounding on my forearms for a second. I grabbed her by the shoulders and twisted so that she was under me. She seemed surprised that I could overpower her now but I ignored her surprise. "Get off me." She whined—a very un-Samlike thing to do.

"Why, do you not like this position?" I was sitting on her stomach, a leg on either side of her. My hands were pressing down on her shoulders and my face was mere inches from hers. It would be so easy to… No. I will not ever do that with Sam Puckett.

Sam suddenly shot upward, her face smacking into mine. Her lips brushed mine for a moment before she fell back again. Her nose was bleeding now though and the blood gushed down her face and onto the floor beneath her. Her eyes blurred with pain and I realized that she must have broken it. Don't get me wrong my nose hurt too but I wasn't bleeding.

I rolled off Sam and stood. I reached down for Sam's hand but she ignored it, standing on her own with a glare in my direction. "Sam, was that a kiss? Or at least an attempted one?" I asked slowly.

"Ew, no, Freddork. I was trying to get up." She spat, kicking me in the shin with great force. I toppled over and she stood over me. "That's for breaking my nose." She kicked me hard in the gut while pressing one hand over her nose to stem the flow of blood. Then she stalks off…presumably to doctor her nose or get some ham…or both.

As soon as she is gone, I moved over to her laptop. Luckily it seemed devoid of soda. I glanced up at the screen and I noticed that Sam had Microsoft Word open. I glanced at the name of the file "Keep out…that means you Freddork." I smirked and go to close the laptop but something drew my eye.

The document was written like a diary and I couldn't help but notice a list entitled: 20 reasons why I will never find someone. It almost broke my heart to read the list. Each thing was something that I loved about her. I couldn't just leave this be. I didn't want her hating herself like this-I cared too much about her for that. So I inserted some commentary.

I was typing fast to beat Sam. If she came back I would be dead…deader than dead in fact. She would dance on my grave happily if she caught me. I was so into what I was writing, though, I hadn't heard the door open again.

"What are you doing with my laptop, Benson?" The voice cut through the air and I looked over at Sam with genuine fear. Even with her busted nose, she rushed forward and snatched the computer back. "You read it?" Her voice was small. I could hear the anger drain out as it was replaced with absolute distress . I just nodded.

I couldn't stand the next few moments. She was reading what I wrote. My heart was in my throat and I could see the look on her face was one of horror…or at least I assumed that was what it was. Then she looked back up at me, her eyes wet.

I hadn't realized what was happening until her lips crashed into mine. I was in shock for a few seconds before I started kissing her back. I felt her fingers on the back of my neck and I tangled mine in her hair. She moaned softly in the back of her throat. I opened an eye and saw her face redden. Then her single blue eye opened as well and we saw that we were watching one another. We broke apart, both red and smirking awkwardly.

"Um…sorry." Sam muttered, a tear on her cheek. I wiped it with my thumb.

"You have nothing to be sorry about." I replied, pulling her into a hug and giving her a peck on her forehead.

Next to us her laptop read:

20 reasons why I will never find someone:

1. I write stupid lists like this. – It's actually kind of cute.

2. I eat like an animal. – So what? If that turns a guy away, then he doesn't deserve you.

3. My feet are always dirty. –You aren't some neat-freak...with my mother, it is almost refreshing.

4. I'm mean. – No, you're just abrasive.

5. I have a drunken mother and no father. – I don't have a father either. And my mother is a bit crazy.

6. I might be a lesbian. – Even if you are, I will support you…no matter how much it would hurt.

7. But I might also love a dork (who will never love me back). – Not so sure about this one. ;)

8. My best friend is perfect…everyone picks her over me. – Not everyone.

9. Callous nicknames are kind of my thing. –Whatever you say Sam-dork.

10. I am a delinquent. (And have no future for that matter). – If you were a goody-two-shoes…you just wouldn't be Sam.

11. I steal from my friends. – You always apologize/return what you took.

12. I lie to my friends. –No, you more like exaggerate.

13. Skirts and heels are the enemy. –I agree.

14. I can sing but I lack confidence –You seem so confident but I guess I was wrong. But you should go for it...I am sure you are great.

15. I am still afraid of the dark (But I will never admit it). –That just shows that you are indeed human and not some emotionless clone like Gibby and I are constantly speculating.

16. I am obsessed with MMA and all kinds of violence. – Just means that you can hold your own in a fight. And that you are strong.

17. I am rash. –This isn't always a bad thing.

18. I am not very smart. – Did you say callous before? I doubt this one greatly.

19. My sense of humor is kind of sick. What teenager's isn't?

20. I'm just not perfect (like Carly). – Don't compare yourself to Carly…no one wants someone who is perfect…your faults are what makes you beautiful. The only truly terrible fault you have is that you haven't kissed me yet…