A/N: Prologue...kinda slow, set the night before the final events of Chosen. This chapter is Rated PG, Later chapters getting into NC17.

PROLOGUE

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Spike lay there listening to the rain as it beat on the room of the summers' house. The rain didn't bother him--he'd spent many nights in rainstorms, searching for victims, when their cries and screams were softened by the sound of rain. He and Dru would go all around the city, looking to cause destruction and death.

But his newly acquired soul and his love for the slayer kept him from all of that. He loved her with all of his body and soul, yet he got nothing in return. Still, he kept on trying. Just having her trust him with all that was dear to her was plenty. He couldn't expect anymore than that.

His thoughts were interrupted by footsteps above him. He quickly identified them as Buffy's. She sometimes came down into the basement in which he was staying before bed to check up on him and talk for a bit. But it was well past 2:00 AM, when she was normally asleep. he heard the basement door creak open and felt her getting nearer. He could smell the all-too-familiar combination of her perfume and shampoo as she came down the stairs.

"Hey," she said when she reached the bottom of the stairs. She was fumbling with her fingers nervously.

"Hey." He echoed, sitting up on his cot. "You're up late..."

"Couldn't sleep." She explained, walking over to sit beside him on his cot. "Rain was too loud."

"Aren't you a little old to be afraid of a rainstorm, love?" he teased, pushing a stray hair out of her face.

"Not scared, Spike. Just can't sleep with all the damned noise. You don't have to hear it banging on the roof down here, so you have no right to tease." She pouted at him, forcing him to hold himself back from leaning in a devouring her bottom lip.

"You know, you're welcome to stay down here," He offered. "I could sleep in the recliner."

Buffy hesitated. "Spike, I don't think that's a good idea..."

"Nothing will happen if you don't want it to." he assured her. She smiled and nodded. He'd regained her trust..she knew she had no reason to worry. Spike reached over and grabbed his jeans, pulling them back on underneath the sheets. He stood to walk over to the chair when he was stopped by a hand on his arm.

"I'm not sleepy yet." She told him, pulling him down to sit next to her. "Right now I feel like talking." She said turning to face him.

They talked for a couple hours...about Dawn, Andrew, the rest of the scoobies. But mostly about the current apocalypse at hand. They discussed who's job was what, and how they were to beat it this time.

"So, what are you gonna do after we defeat this thing, love?" he asked her.

"I dunno..." She began. She hadn't really thought about it. "I'll probably leave Sunnydale." Spike's unbeating heart sunk a little at the thought of losing his slayer.

"Where you gonna go?"

"Dunno. Europe, maybe? I've always wanted to go there. Dawn would probably love it there..." She looked up at his face, sensing the worry and insecurity. She grabbed his hand, intertwining it with hers. "And I want you to come with us."

He looked up at her, disbelief in his eyes. "You do?" She nodded, smiling back at him. "But...why?" he asked her.

"We need you. I need you." She admitted, placing her other hand on theirs. "You make me feel protected...and safe." She explained. "Like you'd do anything for me."

"And I would," He said, honestly.

"And you have." she said, touching his chest. "Protecting Dawn after I died, going out and getting your soul...that was all for me. You didn't get a thing out of any of these..."

"But I did." He interrupted her. " I gained everything." he said, touching her face with the palm of his hand. "Just sitting here with you like this is all I could ever ask for, pet. You feeling that you can trust me enough for this." He gestured toward their hands. "It's what keeps me going. It's what makes me fight the good fight. I know that you'll never love me, but you trust me. Its the greatest feeling in the world, love."

"Spike, its not that I don't love you. It's that I can't love you." She said. "You saw what happened with Angel and Riley. Fighting along side your lover never works out...it--"

"But they had their chance!" he interrupted her. "THEY both left YOU. I never have. I never will. If I'd had the cha..."

"That's why I'm not giving you the chance." She cut him off.

"Listen to yourself, Buffy. Not even two minutes ago you were glorifying me for not leaving when you died. You know that I stayed to protect the Bit, and I would do the same thing again, love. I can't stay away from you. I've come back to Sunnydale for you every time I've left...even before the chip. Buffy, I couldn't leave you if I tried." He was pleading with her now. "Buffy, please. Just give me a chance." He looked into her now watery eyes.

"And what if you don't make it, Spike?" she asked, tears falling. "I'll be going through the same damned thing again!" She looked down, trying to hide her tears.

"No...Buffy...look at me," he lifted her chin up to meet her eyes. "Even if I die tomorrow, even if I don't survive this, I'll be back. There isn't a force in this universe that can keep me from you, and you know it. Buffy, I promise. If you give me this, if you let yourself love me...I won't let you down." His own eyes began to tear up. "Please, love. Give me chance." His own tears threatened to fall, causing Buffy to lose control of her own.

He pulled her to him as she cried into his chest. He held her, soothing her with his soft words and kisses wherever he could reach. Eventually she looked up and met each one with one of her own.

"I just don't want to lose you, Spike...I can't lose you..." She sobbed.

"Shh...love, it's ok..." He stroked her hair, her head in the crook of his neck. He kissed the top of her head. "I love you Buffy..." he whispered, closing his eyes. "I won't let you down...I promise."

He held her like that all night. They both fell asleep, peacefully sleeping in the arms of the one that they loved.