Perhaps Gone
Forever
AN: This is my first fanfic in a loooooooooooooooong time...so I apologize in advance if it sucks and the characters are OOC. This is also my first Star Wars fic..so please be gentle! ^^;; and remember! Constructive criticisms please. No flames.
BG info: Padme and Anakin are in the Death Star. Uh...let's just say that the DS got built...and Anakin's turned to the dark side now. Don't ask me how, I haven't gotten that far yet. The only reason I wrote this was because I was in the mood for some Padme angst and in need for some Ani/Ami fics. ^_^;; Oh, and Anakin is still training to be a sith lord.
In Padme's POV
I look outside and wonder: Is the man I married gone forever? Every day I look at him, and I barely recognize him. Well, his physical features are still all the same - his dazzling blue eyes, his soft short dirty brown hair, his handsome face...and yet, I prefer to not look at him now. His eyes, which once held love and warmth towards me are now cold as ice. He no longer gives me any hint that he loves...or even loved.... me. He only showers me with unbearable glares and scowls. Sometimes he even slaps me. I suspect the day he starts to beat me will come soon too.
I hug myself and ask, 'how did this happen?' Where had I...had we gone wrong? How did I end up in this horrible horrible place with a cold heartless monster? I wonder why he even keeps me here. It's probably because they believe I will be of some use later. Anakin prefers to have nothing to do with me it seems. He rarely talks to me and never smiles now. Gosh, how I miss his smiles. He never touches me either. Every time I try to touch him he brushes me off coldly, and sometimes even snarls at me. The only solace from this nightmare is when we sleep. Anakin doesn't know this, but whenever he fell asleep he'd draw me close to him - and for once, it gives me a sense of hope that maybe..just maybe..he still loves me. And maybe I can get out of this lifeless place. And although I find this peace in his arms, it's short-lived. I make sure to wake up earlier than he does. If he ever woke up to if he ever woke up to find me in his arms, he'd probably push me away and demand we sleep on seperate beds.
::snorts:: I sound so much like a desperate school girl clinging onto a hopeless love.
But I'm not. And although there are times where I desperately just wish Anakin would return my love, I'll admit that it doesn't seem likely. I've given up a long time ago. Actually...as a matter of fact...I hate what my 'husband' has become. I don't want him and his "master" to succeed, but in order to do that i must break out of this place first.
AN: Uuuuuuggh, this didn't turn out the way I wanted. And it's so short. Bummer. PAdme seems too whiny and sad. I wanted more independence and angst and anger. Oh well, it's a start at least. PAdme seems a bit OOC too...durnit. Any advice? ;_; Anyhoo hopefully it'll be better next chapter. It's late now. I'm gonna go to sleep.
AN: This is my first fanfic in a loooooooooooooooong time...so I apologize in advance if it sucks and the characters are OOC. This is also my first Star Wars fic..so please be gentle! ^^;; and remember! Constructive criticisms please. No flames.
BG info: Padme and Anakin are in the Death Star. Uh...let's just say that the DS got built...and Anakin's turned to the dark side now. Don't ask me how, I haven't gotten that far yet. The only reason I wrote this was because I was in the mood for some Padme angst and in need for some Ani/Ami fics. ^_^;; Oh, and Anakin is still training to be a sith lord.
In Padme's POV
I look outside and wonder: Is the man I married gone forever? Every day I look at him, and I barely recognize him. Well, his physical features are still all the same - his dazzling blue eyes, his soft short dirty brown hair, his handsome face...and yet, I prefer to not look at him now. His eyes, which once held love and warmth towards me are now cold as ice. He no longer gives me any hint that he loves...or even loved.... me. He only showers me with unbearable glares and scowls. Sometimes he even slaps me. I suspect the day he starts to beat me will come soon too.
I hug myself and ask, 'how did this happen?' Where had I...had we gone wrong? How did I end up in this horrible horrible place with a cold heartless monster? I wonder why he even keeps me here. It's probably because they believe I will be of some use later. Anakin prefers to have nothing to do with me it seems. He rarely talks to me and never smiles now. Gosh, how I miss his smiles. He never touches me either. Every time I try to touch him he brushes me off coldly, and sometimes even snarls at me. The only solace from this nightmare is when we sleep. Anakin doesn't know this, but whenever he fell asleep he'd draw me close to him - and for once, it gives me a sense of hope that maybe..just maybe..he still loves me. And maybe I can get out of this lifeless place. And although I find this peace in his arms, it's short-lived. I make sure to wake up earlier than he does. If he ever woke up to if he ever woke up to find me in his arms, he'd probably push me away and demand we sleep on seperate beds.
::snorts:: I sound so much like a desperate school girl clinging onto a hopeless love.
But I'm not. And although there are times where I desperately just wish Anakin would return my love, I'll admit that it doesn't seem likely. I've given up a long time ago. Actually...as a matter of fact...I hate what my 'husband' has become. I don't want him and his "master" to succeed, but in order to do that i must break out of this place first.
AN: Uuuuuuggh, this didn't turn out the way I wanted. And it's so short. Bummer. PAdme seems too whiny and sad. I wanted more independence and angst and anger. Oh well, it's a start at least. PAdme seems a bit OOC too...durnit. Any advice? ;_; Anyhoo hopefully it'll be better next chapter. It's late now. I'm gonna go to sleep.