A/N: I'm so, so sorry.
Disclaimer: I do not own Jesus, or that wonderfully catchy song "Jesus Take the Wheel."
Carrie Underwood was driving down a road at night when she saw a truck heading straight towards her. She threw up her hands and cried, "Jesus take the wheel!"
There was a flash of light, and Carrie found herself in the passenger's seat. She looked around wildly and her eyes finally fell on a black man with a beard and shades sitting at the driver's wheel.
"Who are you?" she asked.
"I'm Jesus," he answered.
"Oh." Carrie said, watching as Jesus drove down the wring side of the road. "Jesus, you don't know how to drive, do you?"
"No. We didn't have cars back during 0 A.D."
"Oh." Jesus was running numerous cars off the road now.
"Can I have the wheel back now?" Carrie asked politely.
"Sure." Said Jesus, and disappeared to the sound of a heavenly choir.
Carrie continued on her way, humming a song that was quickly forming in her mind . . .