I don't own Twilight. I do own this b-e-a-utiful laptop. Heh… Anybody know what movie that's from?

Edward's Point Of View

"Edward!" Bella sang as she walked in to the room.

"Guess what I got, Edward!" She said.

"Um, I don't know, love. What?" I asked, happy that she was in a good mood. She had been slightly moody lately.

"I got… a baby!" she said happily.

I looked at her sharply. "A what?!"

"I got a baby! Isn't that great? She is so cute!" she said. "You'll love her!"

She ran out of the room, apparently to get her new baby.

"Alice!" I called out quietly, knowing she would hear me.

She came into the room and looked at me pleadingly and sheepishly at the same time, if that was possible.

"I tried to stop her, I really did! But now that she's a vampire she's so fast! I couldn't get to her in time to stop her from taking the baby… And, Edward… there is something you need to know about her. Bella doesn't know but—" Alice began, but was cut off by me shrieking, "SHE STOLE IT?!"

Just then Bella skipped back into the room with a baby in her hands.

"I did not steal her!" She told me indignantly. "And you will not refer to her as 'it'. I haven't thought of a name for her yet…But I will!"

The little girl looked to be about one or two years old. She had curly blond hair and big blue eyes. I had to admit, she was ridiculously cute… for a baby.

I was curious to see what I could hear from a baby's mind so I probed around a little bit.

To say I was shocked out of my mind would be an extreme understatement.

Before I could warn Bella, she said, "Just look at her, Edward! Isn't she just the cutest little thing! I got her some books from the library, and I'm going to go read to her now!"

"Bella, wait, there is something you need to know—" I started desperately, but she was already out the door.

I sighed and decided I would tell her later. I didn't think one little baby would be much of a threat.

I chuckled sarcastically to myself. Famous last words…

Bella's Point Of View

I walked with the baby in my arms towards mine and Edward's room. I had picked out a book my mother had read to me often. Mr. Brown Can Moo! Can You? By Dr. Seuss.

I sat on the floor with her and opened the book. The baby looked a bit bored, and I hoped she would like reading.

"Oh, the wonderful things Mr. Brown can do! He can go like a cow! He can go MOO MOO," I read to her in a baby voice, "Mr. Brown can do it. How about you?"

"Come on sweetie, can you go MOO MOO?" I asked, wrinkling my nose at her and making baby faces.

She looked at me slightly disdainfully and said, "Of course I can, you idiot. I bet you can too, you freaking cow."

She then got up and walked over to the bed.

"I'm going to lie down and pretend I'm napping. Wake me up when you get some brain cells. Or when your hot husband comes back… Yummy." She said, leaving me completely shocked.