This is a brief one shot based on the end of last nights show. The look on Addison's face when Derek told her he was in love with Meredith was so hope shattering. You don't tell your wife you are in love with someone else on Christmas! So anyway, here is a brief schnipp of a one shot.
Have you ever had your heart smashed to a million pieces?
Or better yet, have you ever been punched in the stomach?
The feel of the wind being pushed out of your body.
The slight burn.
The mind numbing pain.
I had suspected that he felt something stronger for her, but this.. I wasn't expecting this. I look at him. I am sure that my emotions are bared for everyone to see.
I don't know what to do. Should I get up and walk out? Should I cry? Should I scream at him? What do I do? My husband. The man I love with all my heart, has just told me that he is in love with another woman.
I looked down at my buttered rum. My fingers interlocked. My wedding band stared at me, almost taunting me.I can feel tears threatening my eyes
Get up, Addison. Don't let him see you cry. Don't allow yourself to feel this way.
I take a deep breath and gather my magazines. I look up. Derek isn't looking at me. His eyes are on his own drink. His fingers are massaging his ringless finger.
"Is there anything you want me to say? To do? I don't know what to do right now, Derek. How does a woman take her husband being in love with someone else? You didn't leave me, yay! Is that my consulation prize? You can't love me, but you can stay married to me."
He didn't say anything. He simply continued staring at his hands.
I took one last drink of my rum and stood up. I placed the magazines in my bag.As best as I could, I attempted to keep myself together
I wouldn't show any other sign of weakness or emotion until I was safely in my car, away from prying eyes and listening ears.
"Christmas was our time. It is supposed to be our thing. The one thing besides medicince we are really, really good at.Thank you, Derek. Thank you for making this the best christmas ever." I started walking towards the door, hoping he would run after me. Another part of me wished he would sit there nursing his scotch.
"Dr. Shepherd."
I turned at the door to look into my husband's tormented eyes.
"I never said, I didn't love you."
I blinked. Was THAT supposed to make me feel any better? I sighed. Looking at him hurt so much, sometimes.
"Merry Christmas, Dr. Shepherd.
"Merry Christmas, Addi."