Be Somebody - Levi x Thug Reader Oneshot, an attack on titan/進撃の巨人 fanfic

TW: Mentions of Sexual Child Abuse. It's very subtle, and I do mean very, but I thought I should tell you anyways.

The place was just covered in filth and grime. But that is to be expected in a place like the Underground. A place where humans are trash and it was kill or be killed; not exactly the nicest place in the world for children. Her tiny arms and legs were wrapped securely around my neck and torso as I passed by overhead, while the heavy knapsack slapped against my back as I used the 3DMG to bypass the other crooks that littered this damned place, the straps biting into my skin through my dusty clothes as I scanned the ground. A silent curse slipped past my chapped lips at the sight of them. The damned Scouting Corps. were here once again.

"Hold on tight, Cameron." I told the 9 year old girl, feeling her grip tighten even more, as I used the 3DMG that I modified to suit me better, as we flew above their heads, before dropping to the floor and blending in with our fellow sewer rats. Holding Cameron tightly to my front, I pushed a rickety wooden door open with my hip, before closing and locking it up. "I'm back!" I shouted into the seemingly empty underground house, and pulled down the bandana I wore around the lower half of my face.

"Mom!" a large group of four boys and one other girl shouted, running down the old wooden steps.

"Derek, Morgan, Jon, Zack, and Lacy! What have I told you about shouting?!" I scolded them all, watching as they hung their heads in shame. I simply sighed. "Get cleaned up. Once you're done, Zack and Morgan are on peeling duty. Jon, you, Lacy, and Derek set the table. And you," I crouched down and pressed my lips against Cameron's dust coated forehead, "get cleaned and some rest. I'll get you when dinner is ready."

"Okay mommy." With a quick hug, Cameron left and went upstairs towards the bedroom she shared with me and Lacy. Standing up, I cleaned my hands and face in the kitchen, scrubbing away the underground filth that clung to me like a second skin, before pulling out the second knife I kept on my person and began dicing up the bit of meat we had.

Lacy came in and started throwing what was chopped up into a large pot, after she washed her hands again, and proceed to stir it and everything else that got tossed in. "Do you guys know why the Scouts are filling this place?" Morgan asked, throwing a peel at Zack's face.

"Hey, stop that, you ass!" whined the eldest boy, flicking the potato's skin from his cheek. The room went quiet shortly after as all their gazes lingered on my back, silently willing me to answer the question.

"The answer is obvious, isn't it? After all, this is not the first time they looked for one of us to join their ranks." I spoke softly, remembering when I was just nine-years-old and watched when they took them into their ranks. "Curfew is still set for you, so if I catch any of you sneaking out, Jon, you'll be without supper for a few days." My [color] eyes cut over to the nervous 12 year old. Derek and Morgan, the twins, were both thirteen, Lacy ten, while Zack was the oldest at fourteen, just two years younger than myself.

After a while I walked up the steps and knelt down by Cameron's sleeping form and shook her awake. She groggily got up and took my hand, following after like a baby duckling as I sat her down at the kitchen table, filled my tanks, and made for the door while pulling my bandana back over my nose and mouth. "You not gonna eat with us mommy?" Cameron asked, blinking her large doe eyes owlishly at my retreating back.

"Not tonight, sweetie. Zack's in charge until I return." I unlocked the front door and closed it behind me, easily blending in with the group of people that surrounded me, and made my way to the main tunnel of the Underground. The closer I got did the stench of stale sweat, vomit, alcohol, sex, and death start to assault one's nose. If it was not for the black cloth wrapped around my face, the stench would have been ten times worse than whatever I currently smelled.

A few men I passed nodded their heads in greeting, while others moved out of my way as the heavy heels of my boots thudded against the stone floor. "Don't do anything stupid, Widow… Ever since Kenny left, you've been the only form of law for us." A beefy man stated as he grabbed my left arm, just as I was passing his hole in the wall.

"Did you not know that black widows are venomous?" without any hesitation, I broke the larger brute's wrist. "May that be a painful reminder to keep your hands to yourself." The last thing he saw was the scarred palm of my left hand… In the shape of a female black widow spider.

[-][-][-]

"What does the Scouting Corps. want with street rats?" I asked, perching myself on top of a rock that jutted out from the dirt walls, allowing one of my legs to hang off the side as I stared them down. A tall man with blond hair, ridiculously bushy brows, and sharp icy eyes looked up at me; his gaze lingering on the handles to my blades as an obvious sign that I was ready to flee at a moments notice.

"You would be this 'Widow' we've been hearing about, correct." I pushed back a strand of my greasy [length/color] hair, not wanting to answer the man in the bolo tie. The man took my silence as confirmation. "You and your subordinates have been causing quite an uproar in the Capital."

My eyes hardened at the term 'subordinates'. "And your point being? Is this not a matter for the King's personal collection of rats to deal with?" I growled, fingers digging into the grips of my 3DMG handles. "You should know that you are in our city. The King's roots do not extend down to the waste that the Capital has created. Anyways, with all that glitter you carry on your person, you sure are going to attract a few weasels~" at that moment, the more ruthless thugs that littered the area that the Scouts were stationed started wandering in, causing me to take my leave.

[-][-][-]

"Mommy!" my head snapped down from my spot above, only to spot Cameron's dusty blonde head struggling to get out of the arms of a person with wild russet hair. Swinging back around, I planted my feet solidly in their back while taking Cam out of their arms, feeling her cling desperately to my thin person. "Mommy!" she sobbed, soaking the shoulder of my [color] button-down.

The person groaned under my feet, and started shifting enough that forced me to get off their back, leaving two boot marks on their jacket… on the Wings of Freedom. "Tch. Of course…" I gently rocked Cameron, making her cries slow down to a soft whimper and occasional hiccough. The person with wild russet hair got to their knees, rubbed their head, before looking around.

"Where'd the kid go?! I had so many questions to ask her! ARGH!" without a single care about the dirt and other filth that littered the Underground, the person – woman – flopped back down and started dramatically sobbing, not caring the least bit about her cracked glasses.

"Oi! Stupid glasses! Shut the hell up!" her cries were getting on my nerves, withering them away to nothing, as I stepped on her head in hopes of using the cold ground to muffle the damn sound. I had zero tolerance for others whining about shit.

"Mmph! Mmph, mmph, mmmm!" they flailed again, pushing my foot off her head as she turned to face me. Cameron nuzzled herself closer to my side and proceeded to suck on her thumb, a bad habit that she has yet to break, as the woman adjusted her cracked glasses. "Whoa! You're the bandit that danchou wants to meet! Widow, isn't it?!"

Grabbing her head, I slammed my forehead against hers. "Oi, stupid glasses, keep your damn voice down! You're not Above, so don't act like you are!" Even with our heads pressed so close together, she proceeded to nod happily like an excited puppy. "Tch, you are a pain. You're probably the type that'd still follow even if I used my Gear, huh?" again, she nodded.

"I'm Hanji Zoe! Squad leader and person in charge of Titan research!" I simply scoffed and turned around. Hanji proceeded to follow me like the excited puppy she seemed to be.

[-][-][-]

"I'm home…" I called out flatly, my [color] gaze cutting over to Zack when he and the others made an appearance. Setting the dusty blonde child down, I closed the gap between me and the teenage boy, pulled him down to my short height, and proceeded to headbutt him right between the eyes. "Idiot! I cannot leave you in charge for less than two hours without you fucking up! Cameron could have been hurt, or worse, she could have been killed!" with each word, I kicked him hard in the side, causing the others to wince at his punishment.

"We had our hands full with Jon! He kept trying to get out so he could start going to those Fight Clubs again in the Lower District, mom!" Derek and Morgan pipped up, pointing at the guilty boy. I simply punched him in the back of the head.

"OW! That hurt ma!"

"That's the point, brat! Use your brain next time, not your damn fists!" Jon pouted, rubbing at the forming lump on his skull. "Lacy, take Cam upstairs and get ready for bed. Both of you." She nodded, her short ginger hair sticking up every which way, and grabbed Cameron's free hand as the both ventured upstairs. With that done, I plopped down at the kitchen table, throwing my legs over the corner and crossing them, as I gestured to an empty spot for Hanji. She sat down, her wide eyes flittering around the room, trying to take in everything at once. "What exactly do the Scouting Corps. want with me?"

Her eyes zoned in on me once I started speaking. "Danchou wanted to talk to you about joining us. Seems you and your family have made quite a name for yourselves, however it seems that you have his interest out of all of you." She pointed at me. I appreciate Hanji's use of 'family' over 'subordinates.'

I sighed, pulling my bandana down. "If he is only looking to recruit me, then he best leave. I have my family to take care of…"

"Mom, think this through…" Zack spoke softly into my ear. "Just play that game with them. If you win, you stay, if they win, you go." Waving him off, I allowed my feet to fall loudly back onto the wooden floor.

"How about we place a wager. Us of the Underground like a good bet. If I can escape and/or evade all the Scouts that are currently here, you will all go away and I shall stay here. However if I am caught and cannot escape in the time limit, I will keep my word and join you. Take it or leave it."

"What kind of time limit are we talking about?" she inquired, leaning her elbows on the creaky wooden table top.

"Does two hours sound good to you?"

Hanji stood, her palms flat against the top, as she nodded. "I'll have to confirm with danchou, but you have a deal, Widow."

"[full name]."

"What?"

"My name. It is [full name]."

With a small smile, she nodded and left.

Sighing heavily, I casted Zack a side long glance. "Let us just hope that your damn plan works, idiot…"

[-][-][-]

I stood in front of the whole Scouting Corps. waiting, my bandana pulled over my face while my oily [color] hair was pulled back and tied with a string. 'It's starting to feel really nasty…' I inwardly cringed at remembering that I haven't bathed in a few days to save water for cooking and the others, as disgusting as that might be, it was one of the major problems most had to deal with while living in the Underground.

Hanji happily bounce before me, a large grin spread across her sun kissed face. "Widow! You came!"

Scoffing, I crossed my arms over my small chest. "I gave my word, didn't I? What kind of example would I be to my family if I broke a vow?" I stressed the word 'family' once I caught sight of Mr. Forehead-mustache.

She nodded in understanding. "Anyways, about your offer… Danchou agreed to it~"

"Ah…" I gestured to the others to come over. "Derek, you and Morgan go to the Lower District and tell the dumb-fucks down there that if they so much as think of causing trouble, that they'll be getting a 'Lacy Surprise'." I tossed a hooked blade towards them both, which they caught and grinned devilishly at what they could possibly do, and nodded before running off. "Jon, you're in charge of Lacy and Cam… Zack…"

"Yeah?" the tall auburn haired teen asked, coming forward.

"Still have that watch your daddy gave you?" he nodded, pulling out the silver pocketwatch. "You'll be time-keeper. Understood?" he popped open the cover, signaling that he was ready. "On your signal… danchou…" I purred sarcastically, pulling out the handles for my 3DMG. At the slightest twitch of his dominant hand did I react, shooting the cables and fleeing from the Scouts that chased me through the chaos of the Underground.

[-][-][-]

Nearly two hours have passed, as it started getting down to the last ten minutes, and I stood in a dark alleyway, trying to catch my breath. Ejecting one of my tanks, I shook it a bit, hearing the gas inside, alerting me to the fact I only had ¼th of a tank left. "Fuck." My head snapped up, seeing a figure wearing Maneuver Gear at the mouth of the alley. I stepped back as they stepped forward, my eyes darting around for any form of escape.

Locating one, I shot one of my cables off, hearing the Scout do the same just a hair trigger second after I did. Mere seconds later I felt someone tackle me out of the air, forcing our cables to release as we tumbled to the hard ground. I groaned, head throbbing from where it made contact with the solid floor – of fucking course it is solid [name]! – as something cold brushed against my collarbone. My left hand shot to my hip, retracting a flick blade, and pressing the sharp point against their right femoral artery.

Seems they had the same thought in mind as they pressed their own knife against my carotid artery. [color] clashed against stormy gray orbs as I stared at the person above me. 'Of fucking course it would be him of all people…' Resigning myself to my fate, I placed my weapon away, and just laid there under his person. His heavy lidded eyes read his confusion, causing me to smirk, as I looked away, and caught sight of Zack. My heart started hurting, as I saw the tears he shed drip off the point of his chin, before he scrubbed them away with his sleeve.

"T-Time!" he shouted, alerting others of the Corps. that it was all over…

[-][-][-]

Ten years had passed since then, and not a day goes by that I do not miss my family. "Bun-taichou [name]!" I turned, seeing one of the rookies – Jean, I think his name was – call out to me while struggling to maintain his balance under the large stack of documents he held in his arms.

I quickly grabbed the top half, lessening his load, and quirked an eyebrow at him. "Yes?" his cheeks flushed a dusty pink as I continued to stare up at him. Due to crappy genetics and being malnourished most of my life, I was the shortest person in the Scouting Corps. at the shitty height of four foot-nine inches. However, unlike before where I was mistaken for a little boy, in my time as a Scout I had… filled out… a lot.

Because of this, most rookies seem to develope this odd crush on me, until training comes around; earning me the nickname of "Satan's Mother" by nearly everyone. "Err… Heichou wants to speak with you."

"Ah…" I gave him back the documents and straightened my uniform a bit, fixing the leather gloves I wore along with the black bandana I wore around my neck, before turning on my heels, heading towards Levi's office.

Knocking, I waited politely for an answer. "Name and business…" his deep voice commanded.

"[name] and you asked for me, stupid." Rolling my [color] eyes, I pushed open the door and promptly entered, taking a seat directly across from his desk, and crossed my legs.

He shuffled and straightened a few documents after shooting me a look, before resting his chin on his laced fingers. "I've noticed how distracted you have been lately, [name]. That is unlike you, and we cannot afford any type of distractions…"

This was Levi's own way of asking what was wrong. I sighed, turning to stare out his open window. "I miss them. That's all…" he quirked an eyebrow at me. "Also, an anniversary is coming up. After 10 years, it seems everything is starting to overflow."

"What… kind of anniversary?" Levi hesitantly asked, possibly feeling a bit out of place.

I attempted a sardonic smile. "Forgive me. I tend to forget that no one here knows everything about me. It is my actual daughter's death anniversary." I looked down at my leather-clad hands. "You, of all people, know how bad it can get there. Children are the main targets for anything, and I just happen to be one of those targets. One of the King's prized rats decided to… well…" he understood what I meant. "I was probably 9 or 10. I don't know, the years blend together anymore that keeping track is troublesome. Its a painful process, giving birth, but knowing that there will be someone to love you unconditionally makes all the pain worth it. However, Allison died five months after she was born. She got sick, and there was nothing I nor anyone else could do for her."

I wrung my hands. "It was around that time that I met Zack and his father. I struck a deal with them. I would take Zack and raise him like my son, and in return his father would kill one person for me. I accepted and he took care of my personal monster. After that, I started taking in kids that had trouble adjusting to the Underground, and all that jazz. I became their mother, they became my kids, and we made a living for ourselves… I have not seen my family in ten years, and I miss them dearly…"

I tensed, feeling Levi roughly grab my wrist and hauled me up to my feet. His steely, near silver, gray hooded gaze stared down into my own [color] bewildered ones. "We have a few days off, [name]. You should use them to see your family again."

Levi released my wrist and turned on his heel, keeping his back facing towards me. "Heichou, would… would you like to visit them with me?" His gunmetal gray eyes pierced me as he cast a simple look back at me from over his shoulder, silently questioning my reason for my request. "The reason should be obvious… Mainly to someone like you, Levi." Crossing my arms over my midsection, I smirked softly. "I know a few routes to get there that you would never believe, too."

[-][-][-]

I pulled my old bandana up, over the lower half of my face, as we descended the steps of a bakery's cellar, only gaining access after showing the aging owner the brand of a female Black Widow on my left palm, before finding a trapdoor. Grabbing the rusted handle, I started pulling it up, making it kick up dust as it revealed another set of handmade dirt steps. "Tsk, disgusting…" the Corporal grunted, waving a hand in front of his face to clear the air of the dust particles.

"It's the Underground, heichou. Nothing is clean down there." I stated, lighting a lantern and went down the stairs first, listening as the dirt crunched under the souls of our boots as the stale smell of vomit, urine, alcohol, and garbage started to surround us both. "Ugh… I do not miss this stench in the least bit!" I exclaimed loudly as I pinched my nose closed.

It took us probably ten, fifteen, minutes to reach the main area of the Underground, causing both of us to stare at the changes that have been made since either of us last step foot in this place. As we wandered through the grimy streets, our cloaks drawn tight around us to obscure our Maneuver Gear, did a filthy hand shot out, tightly grasping my right wrist as the person held me above, causing me to drop the lantern.

"Why ain't ya a purdy thin'…" the disgusting fat slob crooned darkly, eyeing me up and down. "Ya seem to have somethin' shiny attached t' ya, too…"

I narrowed my [color] gaze in annoyance as I dangled from my arm. "Know your place, dipshit!" I shouted, biting the hem of my leather glove that covered my left hand and removed it, before ramming my palm against his jaw. The idiot let me go as he staggered back, rubbing at his jaw. Stepping forward, I jammed my heel against his manly-bits, and proceeded to show him the brand on my palm. "Fuck off before I show you why Black Widows are venomous." The man quickly scampered off as I pulled my glove back on.

"Even after ten years, your scar still seems to scare people." Levi commented, having watched the whole thing instead of helping.

"Yeah, well, when you have to clean up the messes of Derek and Morgan, the Sadistic Pair, you happen to become well known for having two kids that'll do anything when bored." I shrugged, continuing on my way. "Then there was Jon. He and Cameron were the runts, but he had a fighter's spirit, that kid does. If someone wasn't watching him constantly, he'd make his way towards the Lower District for Fight Clubs. I honestly do not remember a time of Jon coming back empty handed, either."

I chuckled. "Then there's Lacy, the second youngest. As tricky as a fox and just as pretty, but if you so much as try to touch her in a way she does not like, consider your balls forfeited." The stoic Lance Corporal winced at the thought. "She keeps a hooked blade strapped to her thigh, just for cases like those. We've all come to call it the 'Lacy Surprise.'" Smiling, I remembered when the boys came up with that one. "Zack was my protégé, as he was with me the longest, while Cameron was our lookout. She has unnaturally sharp eyes. Her eyes are probably as sharp as Mike's nose."

With all this talking I was doing, I nearly bypassed my old home. Taking a deep breath through my nose, I slowly opened the door, fearing of what I would see on the other side. Probably seeing how hesitant I was, Levi set an encouraging hand on my shoulder, I nodded back gratefully and pushed open the old wooden door. "I'm home!" I called out, just waiting for any signs of life.

Footsteps could be heard running down the stairs as a tall man with an auburn colored sea-urchin on his head appeared, blinking his green eyes in confusion at us both, while a set of identical sandy blond haired men stood on either side of him with light Jade green eyes. A stocky, well built, young man with a wild mane of mahogany that fell down his neck, and slightly in his rust brown eyes, stood on the stairs. Peaking over his shoulder was a girl with bright blue eyes and choppy ginger hair, a white cloth mask obscuring her lower face, but I could still see how pale she was. "M-mom?" the identical young men were the first to speak.

Awkwardly, I spread my arms open. "Do I really look that bad?" they both ran over and squished me between them both in a tight hug, causing two others to join in. Out of the corner of my eyes, I noticed the only one that hadn't joined in was Jon.

"What are you waiting for, dumb-fuck? A written invitation? Come and join the group hug!" Lacy scolded, casting a glare at the only one that had not greeted me yet.

He shuffled down the steps before meeting up with me. His thin lips pressed into an even thinner line before he wrapped me up in his arms, easily picking me up off my feet.

[-][-][-]

To say the least, it was nerve wrecking as we all sat around the tiny table that we seem to have outgrown, to the point I actually had to sit on Levi's lap just to make room for everyone. However, my mind did not linger on that fact at all. I noticed that someone was missing from our family reunion. I was afraid to ask, but I did so anyways. I asked the one question I ever regret asking… "where's Cameron?"

The air grew tense as everyone stopped talking. Lacy started looking at her lap, while the twins fidgeted in their seats. Jon looked neutral, while Zack's face contorted into one of pain. "Sh-she died… four years ago…" the young man muttered lowly.

I felt like like I just got the air knocked out of me as I cupped my mouth, feeling my tears drip onto my wrist. "Oh… so now you care?" my head snapped up, [color] meeting rust brown in a startled clash.

Morgan quickly got to his feet first and grabbed Jon by the front of his shirt. "You little shit! That's no way to talk to mom! Of course she cares! Why wouldn't she care that one of her kids died?!"

"She left us, you piss ant! Tell me, how is that carrying for us?! She isn't even our real mother!"

I knew it… I should not have came back…

"Jon—"

"Don't fucking 'Jon' me, Zack! Or are you just that damn blind to overlook the fact that she replaced us! [name] doesn't give a damn about us. Simple as that."

… … …

"Oi, shit stain…" I hiccoughed softly, hearing the Lance Corporal speak for the first time since entering my old home. "How the fuck would you know if [name] replaced you?" his voice was calm and even as he spoke to the younger man. "You are full of shit, you know. That's probably why you have such shitty eyes, too. Your mother, here, has been worrying about you fuckers for the last ten years—"

"Yet she never made an effort to see—"

"Don't fucking interrupt me, shit stain." Levi's voice took on a darker tone to it. "[name] nearly got herself killed because she worried more about a worthless asshole like you than herself." His fingers curled into my hip, making me remember my own carelessness that costed me a dislocation. "In my opinion, she should not waste anything for a little shit like you. Boohoo, the person who took you in had left, because she honored an agreement she made. You know what would have happened instead? The MP's would have gotten her instead, and she would be rotting away in a cell somewhere like an animal. You honestly think those bastards would give a shit about someone from here? A female from the Underground no less?" the man sneered at Jon as my tears ran down face face quickly.

"What's with all this noise? I tryin' ta take a nape…" a soft voice spoke from behind the two – previously – fighting men. "Some'mun has a bad potty mouth, too."

A child, a little girl to be exact, with thin dirty blonde hair stood there, wiping the sleepy dust from her hazel eyes. "Good going, ya dingus." Zack smacked Jon upside the head before picking up the small child.

Zack muttered something that only the child could hear, as I watched on, feeling myself stiffen once her eyes landed on me. A chill ran down my spine, taking in the familiarity of them. "Grammy?" her sleepy voice muffled by the thumb she sucked on.

The auburn haired man handed the tiny child to me, giving me the chance to cradle her in my arms as she rested her head against my shoulder, facing towards the Lance Corporal. "Before some gobshite interrupted me, earlier, I was gonna tell you the reason why Cameron passed away." Zack casted a scathing glare at Jon, causing the younger man to cringe, appearing smaller than he really was, before redirecting his gaze back to me. "That little girl is why Cam's not with us. She gave up her life to bring her into the world… However, before she passed, Cam mentioned that it was something you would have done. That you would give your life for your kids… And that's why this gobshite is pissed." To make a point, the auburn haired man slapped Jon upside his head.

"Grumpy looks grumpy…" the tiny child mumbled around her thumb, looking directly at Levi. "Grumpy needs a bananer… they make you happy."

My [color] eyes widen as I turned, facing the dead-panned Lance Corporal who seemed to be having a staring contest with the little four year old. The child was not going to back down and pointedly kept staring back. "Grumpy?" I inquired.

"Grammy," she pointed up at me, "Grumpy," her finger now pointed directly at Levi's face. It finally clicked as to what she was talking about, causing my whole face to redden at the thought.

"N-No, no, no, no! That's Levi-heichou, not Grandpa! Heichou!"

"Grumpy."

"You are an embarrassment, child!" I covered my face with my hands, groaning in frustration over how adamant she was.

"Pfftt…" the twins started snickering, looking at our odd threesome mischievously. "Allison's dead-set on mom's superior being grandpa… Is that what they teach you in the military?"

"What… was that?" I asked ominously, slowly turning to look at them both as I cracked my knuckles. "Excuse me." I sat the girl on Levi's lap in my place as I stood, making my way around the table towards the two idiots. "Mind repeating that you little fuckers?!" before they had a chance to respond did I grab them both by their collars, dragging them out of the house. "You two talk big, but can you back your shit up?" they lay on their backs, staring up at me, before scrambling to their feet. "Show me what you've learned in the last ten years, kids…"

[-][-][-]

Derek and Morgan groaned as forming bruises littered their forms, and I dusted off my clothes while licking the split lip they gave me. "Still have a long ways to go, children." They said nothing, just narrowing their Jade colored eyes at me from their spots on the ground.

"Are you—"

"— thinking what—"

"— I'm thinking?" they finished together, quickly catching their breaths as coy grins curled their lips. "Of course you are, brother!" the twins got to their feet, ignoring whatever bit of grime or blood that clung to them, as they each threw an arm over my shoulders. "We have decided, mother!"

"And what have you two spawns of Satan decided?"

"Well…"

"… You might not like it…"

"But we have decided that—"

"— we'll join the military with you!"

"What?!"

"Told you that you wouldn't like it." Derek and Morgan dead panned, running their free hands through their sandy blond waves.

"Of course I don't, you idiots!"

"Think of it logically, mom! We're the perfect, and we do mean perfect, team. We don't need to talk to inform the other what is going on, and our attacks are in perfect sync. Throw in the fact that we love to fight dirty if it means us winning the fight, then you got a good set of soldiers."

Turning, I stared at the others that clogged up the door. "Any of you share this fucked up idea?" without any hesitation, Lacy's hand shot up in the air before smacking Jon, who proceeded to slowly raise his own hand. Zack just rubbed the back of his neck as he shook his head in the negative.

"One of us would have to look after Ally, as well as look after any other kids of the Underground, so it'd be best if it was me."

"Oh, is that so?" the auburn haired man flinched, noticing the glint my eyes took. "So the rest of you think you have what it takes to make it as a Scout, hm?" Lacy and the twins nodded furiously. "Heichou, do you think my brats have a chance in the Corps.?"

The vertically challenged man scuffed, carrying the toddler under his arm as if she was nothing more than documents. "I doubt they'd be able to take down Springer or Blouse." I chuckled in agreement with his statement.

"Mother! How cruel of you to doubt your own children!" whined the twins, grabbing my legs.

"Get the hell off me. You aren't 13 anymore!"

"Brother! Mom's sexually frustrated!" they cried as one, clinging to each other as my face heated up.

"Why you—!"

"Instead of killing them, [name], wouldn't it be best to make them eat their words?"

I looked back at my Corporal. "You honestly think Erwin would accept?"

"Tch. I do not give a shit if Eyebrows accepts or not. Your brats would provide some entertainment back at HQ."

"Grumpy's mouth is full of poo…" chimed Allison cheerfully. A tiny grin curled the man's thin lips as his gun metal gay eyes slid down to her.

[-][-][-]

Erwin was no where in sight when we returned, mainly with the six extra bodies that we had following behind us. The young cadets seem to take notice first, as they all came scurrying over to look at the unknown faces. "Let's see…" I sat Allison down as I strolled up and down the line. "You," I pushed Jean forward, "you," Eren, "you," Mikasa, "you," Connie, "and you." I finished while pushing Ymir forward. "Jean paired with Lacy, Mikasa with Jon, Derek and Connie, while Ymir with Morgan."

"Er… what about me, Bun-taichou?" inquired Eren, pointing up at himself.

"You, my dear cadet, will be paired with my protégé Zack." I gestured, watching as the teen's sea-green eyes trailed up, widening at how tall the younger man was. Zack was pushing closer to Mike's height, though he was still a bit shorter than the man with the habit to sniff people. "The rest of you will be watching, got that? As for you that'll be sparring… Word of warning, my kids won't go easy on you and will use any underhanded tactic they can. First up is Lacy and Jean."

I picked up Allison again and leaned back against the wall next to Levi, grinning ever so slightly as Lacy pulled off her face mask, tucking it away in her coat pocket before tossing it away. Jean watched her, looking wary as she slowly walked around him, a coy grin curling her pearl colored lips as her skirt fluttered around her legs. 'The fox is coming out to play.' I thought, just as Lacy slowly glided the tip of her tongue over her upper lip, drawing Jean's eyes there.

"Bad move." Allison commented, watching Lacy zip forward, driving her knee into his stomach before flipping back, lightly bouncing on the balls of her feet as she shook out her arms. Jean looked back up at her, yet his gaze dragged back down to her slender legs. "Stupid!" the ginger haired woman's grin slipped, showing her annoyance as she stomped over and grabbed the sandy-brown haired teen by the collar of his uniform, bringing them face to face.

"Oi, horse-face! Take me seriously, dammit!"

"She said the magic word…" I chuckled, watching as Jean smacked her hands away and took a fighting stance, looking a bit more serious than he did before. Lacy nodded in approval, holding a loose fist out in front of her at shoulder level, while her other hand was left open at hip level.

Punches were thrown and blocked, some hitting while others missed their marks, before Lacy fisted his uniform collar, planting her left foot into his stomach, and throwing him over her head. Without waiting, she flipped herself over and straddled his chest, placing the hooked blade that was hidden under her short skirt against the underside of his jaw. "Hm… Now that I got a better look at ya… yer pretty cute… For a guy with a horse face, that is." Getting up, Lacy dusted off her legs and skirt, leaving Jean on the dirt ground, and smiled at me. "So… How was I, mom?"

"Heichou?"

"She's adequate… for a shitty brat, that is."

Lacy puffed out her cheeks and walked off. "Morgan, Ymir, up front!"

Morgan whistled lowly. "Hello Miss Leggy~" he smirked, standing across from her. "What do you think, Brother?"

"Eh… I'd give her a 6/10. Not our type, though." Morgan nodded in agreement.

Ymir and Morgan's fight ended in a draw, much to the twins' amusement, as I gestured towards Derek and Connie. "Try and keep the trash talk to a minimum, okay?"

"Like the bald look, but personally it's not my style." Derek remarked, pulling his sandy blond hair back into a half ponytail, allowing a few strands frame his charming face, as he cracked his knuckles. "After all, the ladies love having something to hold on to." He chuckled suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows a bit to help get his point across.

Even after the beating I gave him, Derek was able to go easy on the shorter teen. In a matter of minutes, after the older man stopped playing around, did he get behind Connie a pulled him into a wrenching full Nelson, nearly making the younger teen pass out from the lack of blood circulating to his brain. Before Connie passed out from the hold, Derek released him and easily picked him up and carried him over to a tree by the other cadets. Not waiting for my signal, Jon strode forward just before Mikasa.

"You know, right now would be a great time to lay down bets." I muttered, looking at Levi from the corner of my eyes.

Ally watched us both intently, seeing as the two have yet to start their spar, and waited for the man's answer. "Twenty coin, and a week of cleaning duty, says your shit stain son and the brat tie."

I hummed in response. "Okay. Twenty coin, and you actually sleeping, says that Jon'll come out on top." We shook on it to seal the deal. The twenty-two year old man stood his ground, waiting as a gentle breeze blew through, ruffling his mahogany mane. Adjusting her stance just a bit, Mikasa launched herself into action, aiming a swift kick to Jon's side. He took the kick, and all of her punches, while blocking his head, his rust-brown orbs following every movement the oriental girl made like a hawk.

Mikasa swung, aiming to break through his defenses to hit him in the face, only to end up with her arm trapped by his own and pinning it to the side; thus bringing her closer for a headbutt to the bridge of her nose. Jon moved, sliding his hip behind her, using her trapped arm as leverage, and threw Mikasa down. The other cadets gasped in surprise at the take-down, however the red scarf-wearing girl did not stay down for long, as she quickly got back to her feet and charged at Jon. The mahogany haired man blocked her punches, grabbed her scarf, and tossed her back.

If looks could kill, the young male would have been six feet under. From where I stood, I could easily see the young female's jaw locking up, her piercing gaze locked on Jon's challenging one. She came after him again, aiming to swipe his feet from under his stocky form, which worked, making the man fall on his ass. "Tsk." Jon flipped back, barely dodging an axe kick to the top of his head, and got to his knees. Tensing up, he launched himself forward, digging his shoulder right under her breasts, and tackled her to the ground.

The two rolled around, trying to one up the other and pin them, but it didn't last long when Jon got his knee between her legs. "Jon don't—!" without listening to my warning, he kneed Mikasa hard between the legs as he grabbed hold of the lapels of her coat, and headbutted her once more, allowing him to come out on top. Mikasa gasped loudly, curling into the fetal position with her hands between her legs. Setting Allison down, I stormed over to the man who sat on his knees, heavily panting, as he wiped away sweat from his brow. "You idiot!" he flinched, just as my boot made contact with the side of his head. Grabbing a handful of his sweat-drenched hair, I pulled him up and kneed him in the jaw, sending Jon backwards.

"What the hell, mom! You didn't set any rules, meaning it was fair game!" he shouted, wiping away the blood that trailed from his nose.

"When have I ever allowed Fight Club moves, though, Jon?!" Jon bit his tongue but scowled at me in return. "Now you're gonna get off your sorry ass, pick up Mikasa – gently might I add – and take her to the infirmary like the gentlemen that you should be, or so help me I'll kill you myself! Do I make myself clear young man?"

"Y-Yes mother!" he stammered, scrambling to his feet and gently picked up Mikasa bridal style, his ears turning a bright pink, as he lowly asked for directions. Allison, seeing this as a perfect chance to explore, chased after them both and seem to be trying to bombard the Asian girl with questions.

"A-Are you okay, Squad Leader [name]?" Eren asked, coming to my side.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Though I won't say the same for you…" the tanned boy gulped in response, turning to face the ever intimidating Zack. "Seeing as I have to set some ground rules here… No hits below the belt, as in no intentional nut-shots," I casted both boys a look, "and no bladed weapons of any kind." I held a hand out towards Zack, who simply shrugged, and removed a knife from his right boot and a dagger from the left, and placed them in my hand. Seeing my knowing look, Zack took off the one strapped to his right hip, handing it over, followed by the one strapped to his back, before pushing up both of his sleeves to show two combat knives strapped to both of his inner forearms.

Eren's sea-green eyes widen in silent awe at all the blades, while I gestured to the older of the two's boots again. Zack snorted and kicked the heel of his right boot, forcing the hidden blade to pop out, and gave it to me. "That's all of them, I promise."

"Oh, I know. Seven has always been your lucky number." I returned back to my spot next to the Lance Corporal, and proceed to cross my arms. Without saying anything, Levi placed the gold coins he owed in my waiting hand. Eren did not look too sure as he took his fighting stance, his sea-green eyes focused on Zack warily. "Begin whenever you're ready!"

Zack's large size was an advantage, but also a disadvantage, and against someone like Jaeger, his size was a huge handicap. Eren happened to be light on his feet, unlike the auburn haired man, and used that to aid him as they sparred. Very rarely did Zack land a solid punch or kick on the younger male, while said male was able to finally knee him in the mid-thigh, bringing the giant down into a panting mess. "Okay… OW! What the hell is your knee made of, kid? Rocks?"

I whistled lowly, patting Eren on the back as I passed (though I was tempted to pat him on the ass just to see how he'd react, however I will leave that up to Hanji to do), and toed the area on Zack's thigh. He winced in pain as I stared. "The little shit dead-legged you! Of all the damn moves you let him do, you let him fucking dead-leg you! Haha, and was a Grade 2 dead-leg!" I teased, watching as his face heated up into a bright red. "Oi, help your moronic brother up!" I pointed at the twins, who nodded and helped Zack to his feet while sickeningly sweet smiles, "show these idiots the infirmary." The German boy saluted and escorted all three into HQ. Lacy, on the other hand, was too busy talking up a storm with a slightly flustered Jean.

"Was that enough entertainment for you, Heichou?"

"Tch. Your shitty brats might have what it takes to be apart of the Scouting Corps… If they can use 3DMG as well as they can brawl."

I hummed lowly with a soft smile. "What is going on here?" turning around, I spotted Erwin walking over to us.

"Whoops. What now?"

"Levi, [name], what is going on here?" Erwin demanded, standing in front of us.

"A friendly bet?" I offered, making Levi snort.

"Calm the hell down, Erwin. You look like you're ready to take a huge shit." Commented Levi, looking as stoic as ever.

"I would like some answers, Levi. Just who are these people?"

Humanity's Strongest pointed a thumb at me. "Why don't you ask her. They are her brats after all."

Mr. Forehead-mustache quirked one of the majestic sides of said mustache as he turned an icy gaze towards me, silently waiting for my answer. Shooting a quick glare at the shorter man, to which he replied with a smug smirk, I gave the Commander an awkward smile. "You remember the kids I used to look after, right?" he nodded, "you see, it started like this…" I began, telling Erwin what happened, leaving out the embarrassing bit of being forced to sit on Levi's lap, and that my granddaughter thinks that he's her grandpa… "which leads us to this moment in time. Moreover, no matter how much I do not like the idea, they are all grown up and can make their own choices. In addition, from what they've show us, they'd make great soldiers."

"We would have to test them out on the 3D Maneuver Gear, but from what you have just told me, I do not see any reason to not permit them to join our ranks. I trust yours and Levi's judgment, [name]…" Erwin told us both, just as a teasing grin curled his lips. "However, about this bet you two made… How do you honestly plan on getting Levi to sleep more than 3 hours, [name]?"

"Well, since I joined, I sorta have filled out. Women are known as walking pillows… I am a woman, he's a man… Simple math, isn't it?" I replied innocently, watching as heichou's ears turned a bright red as he scoffed softly at my words. This display caused Erwin to chuckle as he left us alone. Sliding my [color] gaze over, I smiled softly at the flustered man. "You do know I willingly gave up that day, right?"

"Why did you?"

Giggling, I shrugged my shoulders. "Who knows? Maybe it was because this guy I happened to look up to – no matter how short he is compared to other men – and is pretty handsome, was straddling my thighs at the time…" his stormy gray orbs widened a fraction, "maybe it also had something to do with the fact that we street rats, the ones casted out like garbage originally, can actually make a name for ourselves. To actually be somebody… Both of those reasons are why I willingly gave up." Chuckling, I noticed how bright Levi's ears were. "I guess what I'm trying to also say is that… I really fucking love you, too, you neurotic clean freak dumbass."

"Where the—!"

"Oh please! You awkward fucker! No one, not even Hanji or Mike, noticed that I was missing my family. In addition, you giving me advice to see them, and agreeing to come with me on top of that? You must either really like and/or love them, or you finally gone batshit crazy. The Levi Ackerman that I know doesn't do shit for nobody unless they are important to him." I stood on the tips of my toes as my fingers wrapped around his white cravat. "Just admit you are an awkward shit when it comes to expressing yourself, and that you love me, even if I'm filthy."

"You are not filthy…" he commented harshly.

"Are you sure about that, heichou? I can be a real filthy woman when it calls for it~"

In mere seconds I found myself slung over his broad shoulder, looking directly at his nice ass, as he carried me into HQ. "Oh? Then I must clean you thoroughly, then, to rid you of such filth [name]."

"Is that a threat, Levi-heichou?" I asked, pushing my [color] strands out of my face.

"No. It's a damn promise."

[-][-][-]

Next morning, when Eren walked into the dining hall, he stared curiously at the Lance Corporal, who, dare the Titan shifter say it, looked normal… Well, as normal as a vertically challenged clean freak could, while everyone else looked miserable. "Why do you all look half dead?" the German teen asked, questioning the newest 'members' of the Scouts and the other cadets, taking note that the little girl was over with Squad Leader [name] and Corporal. He thought he heard the child call the stoic man "grumpy".

Jean groaned, glaring at the other teen. "You sure are fucking lucky, Jaeger, being able to sleep in the basement."

"How the hell is that 'lucky', horse-face?"

"You didn't have to hear them," the long-faced teen pointed at the two formally mentioned adults, "going at it like rabbits all night! It is probably worse than hearing your own parents having sex!"

"Squad Leader [name] just so happens to be a screamer…" Connie added, shuddering at the thought.

The twins giggled to themselves, while the rest of [name]'s family looked ill. "When you put it that way, I'm glad I do sleep in the basement."

Let's see... this damn oneshot is roughly 11 pages long don't say I don't love you, meaning that it has 8,754 words, give or take a few. And it has taken me roughly two fucking weeks to finally write it all... /head meets desk. As for how Reader-chan dresses, well, it's sorta based off of this set (Go to my polyvore (bvb666him) and look for the one with the original title). I was originally gonna call it "The Bandit and the Corporal" /rolls

Hope you fuckers enjoy. I need some damn sleep now.

I hope you guys enjoy that ending, too...

If you didn't, I'll fucking kill you...

As a side note, Levi's probably around 33 while Reader-chan is 26. I like to think Levi was in his mid to late-teens when he joined the Survey Corps. My headcannon age for Levi is 27, believe it or not.