Title: Really Didn't Need To Know
Author: Spiras Stargate
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Slash, Language, Kissing
Spoilers: Just expect a little something from all the seasons.
Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate SG-1 or Stargate: Atlantis. I didn't make any money from this and I don't want to. It's for fun! If I did own Stargate: Atlantis Carter wouldn't be coming to it's galaxy and Carson wouldn't be leaving!
Summary: John didn't know he was supposed to lie.
He didn't know stuff like this ever went on at the SGC back on Earth. At least that's his defense later to Weir after the debriefing he gave her.
A very detailed and highly embarrassing debriefing that he hadn't seen the reason to lie about, because no one had told him that's what they did with missions like this.
Of course it made sense now why McKay had glared at him heatedly and kicked him in the shin under the table when things like, possible ZPM, natives are friend, and gay sexual fertility rituals came out of his mouth.
Weir had of course politely lowered her head and coughed, "Colonel…Thank you but…after we're finished here, I'd like to see you in my office."
"Why didn't you tell me McKay?!"
Rodney looked up from his laptop and rolled his eyes, "I didn't realize I had to! Forgive me for thinking I didn't need to hold your hand!"
"I'm the new guy remember!"
"You don't hear about Mitchell telling Landry about SG-1's kinky alien rituals do you? No. Psycho Colonel at least has a sense of self preservation!"
Zelenka's head popped up, "Kinky alien rituals?" He shook his head and said something in Czech before going back to work on something that looked a lot like a blender.
Sheppard blushed, "Mitchell also lives on Earth and reports directly to the Air Force. Weir is a civilian."
"And you think that makes her want to hear about it? That's a weak come back even for you."
The Colonel blushed harder and jumped when Zelenka turned on the thing that looked like a blender that really was a blender.
"Radek! What have I told you about working on extra projects during the day?!" McKay shouted over the noise. "Turn that thing off and take it back down to the mess hall! People are trying to work in here!"
There's an audible click and the machine shuts off, "Who? You are having conversation about SG-1's kinky alien sex with Colonel Sheppard-"
"Oh my!" Carson had just come into the room and now he stood just inside the doorway looking pale. He was holding a microscope case that looked slightly worse for wear. Obviously he was another of Radek's off the books clients.
"It's not what it sounds like Doc," Sheppard says quickly.
"I should hope not, son! They were only here but a few hours," Despite his words, Carson was still looking at him worriedly.
"Actually it wouldn't surprise me," McKay jumped in. "The colonel's a tad naïve. Dr. Jackson probably gave Vala to him to keep them both out of trouble."
"I am not! Just because I didn't know to lie to Weir about strange sexual fertility rituals does not mean-"
"You told Dr. Weir about something like that?" Carson grimaced, "What were you thinking? Do I need to check you for alien STDs?"
"No!"
"Hmm," Rodney looked John over thoughtfully, "you probably should."
"McKay!"
Rodney rolled his eyes, "He didn't actually have sex Carson."
John relaxed.
"Of course he's always going off with alien priestesses and princesses-"
"You are so dead."
"And one time I think a royal guard. What was his name? Atlar? Altear?"
Zelenka pushed his glasses up his nose, "I didn't know the Colonel was bisexual."
Carson set down his case, grabbed onto Sheppard's wrist and started taking his blood pressure, "Can't be too careful…"
Sheppard sighed, "I hate you all."
What made things worse was that somehow word about what John had said during the briefing had go back to the SGC.
Lucky for John it was only SG-1 that heard about it.
Unluckily for him, Dr. Jackson felt the need to send him a few books he found helpful for alien rituals and Colonel Mitchell sent along with them a note that simply read, 'Keep your team away from purple walnuts.' Carter, Vala, and Teal'c, he was told, didn't send him anything because they were still laughing hysterically (Yes even Teal'c), but they promised to send him something on the next run.
He did however get a note from General O'Neill, that once he read, he suddenly understood why the man was the way he was. It also shed some light on why he needed Jackson on Earth, which was something he could have gone without ever knowing.
He couldn't look McKay in the eye for the next three days.
"So P2X-914," Elizabeth said looking around the table at Teyla, Ronon, Rodney, finally ending up at John. She wasn't going to say anything. She promised herself she wouldn't.
Rodney jumped in, "Uh the MALP sent back images of a temple next to the Stargate. Neither it, nor the other ruins around the gate are close enough to block it."
"In other words we don't have to walk," John supplied.
"We wouldn't have to walk away Colonel," Rodney gave him a withering look. "The only visible structures around are near the Stargate and there doesn't seem to be any signs of civilization else where on the planet."
"I'm just saying that if you decide we need to go on a hike to find some energy reading you've picked up, we won't have to take any nice long strolls."
"Or maybe you don't want to have to saunter your way to the secret meeting of Freaky Alien Sex Addicts Anonymous."
Elizabeth sighed. Well at least she hadn't been the one to say it.
"I screw up one time and you never let me forget it!"
"And that's so different from when I screw up?!"
"Gentlemen…"
"I know where there're some kinky alien rituals we should attend," Ronon supplied.
Everyone turned their eyes on him and blinked.
"I think the prize at one of them is a ZPM," he stared at McKay.
"Why have you not mentioned this before?" Teyla asked.
"Prize? I thought they were rituals?" McKay chose to ignore the sex part entirely.
"Yeah. The best one gets to be the keeper of the thing for the next year, until the next ceremony. It's an honor."
"If we have to give it back," John jumped in before Rodney could open his mouth to declare they were going to whatever backwater planet this ritual took place on, "then what's the point of getting it?"
McKay rolled his eyes, "Colonel they are using it as a trophy and they probably wouldn't know the difference between a dead ZedPM and a fully charged one."
"So you're saying we give them one of the fully depleted ones?" Elizabeth actually looked interested. Apparently she could over look the sex part too.
"Yes," McKay pointed at her.
Teyla even for once looked like she didn't object, "If they are only using it as a trophy and not for protection from the Wraith-"
"They're not," Ronon said looking more bored by the second.
"Then I believe trading one for the other is agreeable."
John frowned, "Was I the only one that heard kinky sex ritual?"
McKay reached over and gave his hand a pat, "Don't worry. I'm sure with the combination of your looks and alien priestess/princes/royal guard seduction techniques you'll be fine."
"Who said I was volunteering?"
Elizabeth lowered her head and then looked up, "Colonel you knew there were risks coming to-"
"Having kinky sex is a risk?" Rodney looked up grimacing slightly.
Weir gave him a dark look, "The point is Colonel, we need every available ZPM we can get our hands on in case the Wraith come back."
"Beckett won't allow this!" John said quickly. He'd never been so grateful for the over cautious man in his life.
"I'm sure he'll understand if it means he won't have to play fighter pilot as much," Rodney sneered at him.
Sheppard realized he wasn't going to get out of this.
John knew this was going to be bad when he came walking out of his room dressed in cream silk pants that had holes going up the outer sides of his legs and the shirt they'd given him to wear was just thin enough that when he'd looked in the mirror he'd noticed the dark color of his nipples showing through.
He also knew it was bad when Teyla gave him a slight smile and rested a hand on his arm, "You will do fine."
"He's going to win," Ronon mumbled checking his only visible knife one more time. There was a bag on the floor next to him filled with what John could only guess was his entry fee.
"Of course he's going to win," Rodney said putting away the life-signs detector into his field vest.
Elizabeth came down into the gate room as the Stargate whooshed to life, "Colonel…You know I wouldn't normally…" she tried to come with something to say that didn't sound so much like she was pimping him out for power sources. She came close, "Put you in this type of situation, but we need this."
Rodney walked past him to toward the gate, "No undue pressure…" he couldn't stop himself from smiling.
John grimaced and sighed. The prospect of getting laid multiple times had never seemed like a burden before setting foot on Atlantis.
Five days later John came back through the gate into Atlantis holding the fully charged ZPM in his arms.
Teyla came back with the Pegasus version of over 20 phone numbers in her pocket.
Ronan had some how managed to get a new knife that looked extremely more wicked than the one he'd owned before.
And Rodney came back with a black eye, a bruised jaw, a cut on his forehead and one on his lip.
Carson had been waiting for them in the gate room thinking John was going to be the injured one, "What happened to you Rodney?"
John turned around and smiled at Carson, "It appears that McKay is the jealous type."
"Excuse me?" Carson turned back to look at Rodney who was furious.
Elizabeth had just come down the stairs and was looking at the ZPM when she'd heard John, "What happened?"
"McKay got in a bar fight over me and my virtue," not only did John sound smug but he was obviously enjoying the chance to get to embarrass Rodney.
"Rodney?!" She was staring at him like he'd lost his mind.
Teyla of course smoothly moved into her line of sight, "The things they were saying about the Colonel were quiet rude. I would have reacted myself had Dr. McKay not done something."
"What were they saying?" Elizabeth asked suspiciously. Her eyes moving between Teyla, John and Rodney who refused to look at anyone, even Dr. Beckett despite the fact he was looking at the wound on Rodney's forehead.
"Only the same things you guys say about me all the time," John said in a very matter-o-fact way. "The 'Kirk' jokes."
"They were far more detailed than anything I have heard someone say about you," Teyla's look darkened.
"That's the way this thing was supposed to go! You wanted me to do this, and you should have known how I was going to be treated." He held out the ZPM to Elizabeth. "Now if you don't all mind I'm going to go take a night hot shower."
Elizabeth took the ZPM gently and cradled it in her arms like a baby, before hitting the side of her radio, "Dr. Zelenka? Could you come to the Gate room please?"
Rodney looked toward her, "I can install it."
"You need to get down to the Infirmary son. You've got yourself a nasty gash," Carson reached up to look at his lip.
Dr. McKay pulled away, "I'm fine!"
"Rodney you're not fine," Elizabeth gave him a stern look. "Now go with Dr. Beckett before I have to order you."
The next two weeks were tense throughout the base and Elizabeth couldn't figure out why. John's smugness shouldn't have made any difference. He was only one man, albeit a very strange man, but one man none-the-less.
Rodney's quiet refusal to be in the same room as Sheppard was probably more the reason why everyone was on pins and needles, but she wasn't getting any complaints from any of his staff or from anyone else's staff.
Radek came to see her more, but he never said anything about McKay acting strangely. He usually informed her on the new information coming up in the Database or about something that had come online we he'd installed the ZPM.
She ignored that it wasn't Rodney, even though it always had been Rodney coming to her before with discoveries.
She even ignored it when she called for him and Radek came instead.
But she drew the line, when Radek had showed up for a Department Heads meeting.
"Where's Dr. McKay?"
The Czech looked nervous, "He is in the lab working."
"This is a Department Heads meeting."
"You said I could fill in for him if he was-"
Elizabeth leaned forward, "If he was ever off-world, injured or missing yes, but he's none of those things."
"He told me to come," Radek explained gently, looking over the tops of his glasses at her.
Carson frowned, "That's not like him."
"You're damn right it's not," John was frowning too. It was the first unhappy emotion she'd seen on his face since he'd come back from their last mission.
Teyla looked at him, "Perhaps he is still injured."
"I wouldna let him return to work if he wasn't ready," Carson looked at her.
"Physically I believe he is fine…" she smiled at Dr. Beckett before looking back at John, "but I fear he may be injured in another way. One he is not willing to admit."
"You think he's hurt emotionally?" Elizabeth's eyes were wide, "Over what happened to…" she slowly moved her eyes over to John.
He looked uncomfortable.
"I have never seen him react as he did in the Colonel's defense. I think he might be scared…and embarrassed of his actions. Especially when he probably did not know how strong his feelings for the Colonel were, until that night."
"You think he's in love?" Carson looked amused but slightly worried.
"I believe so."
Radek had a far away look in his eyes, "It would make sense."
Elizabeth looked back at John who still looked uncomfortable, "Colonel?"
"It's always me isn't it?"
She gave him a weird look, "What's always you?"
"I never see it coming!" he looked at Teyla, "Why didn't you say anything?"
"Feelings such as these are better found on their own. Ronon did not always agree but-"
"Ronon knew too?!...Is that what that skins comment was about?"
Teyla raised an eyebrow.
"Nevermind," John sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Alright who has ideas?"
"Ideas for what?" Carson asked.
"On how I can ask Rodney out on a date," John said in his, this-is-obvious-and-I-shouldn't-have-to-explain-it-to-you voice.
Elizabeth leaned forward, "You want to ask him on a date?"
"Yeah? Why not?" John gave her a smug little smile.
"Can you not just ask him?" Teyla looked confused.
"He'd know something was up," John whispered to her.
She frowned, "I don't understand."
"In Earth culture, if someone reveals that a person likes another, then we feel caution must be used in getting the person who doesn't know their secret has been told to go out with the person that has been told," Carson explained.
"Why?"
"Because we like to think that the person we've been longing for figured it out themselves," Elizabeth said. "It's…complicated."
"I…see…." Teyla obviously didn't.
"If he knew that I knew…he's probably get mad and stay as far away from me as he could."
"Is that not the case now?"
John blushed, "Well yeah but-"
"He'd probably request to move to Mainland," Radek said.
"Exactly!" John pointed at Radek when he said it.
"So first we must get him to talk with you and be near you correct?" Teyla didn't understand them, but she caught on fast.
"You have a plan?" John looked at her.
"I think so, but it will take some time and we all must be in on it or else it will not work."
John looked around at the other three in the room and they all nodded to him, "We're game. What's the plan?"
Radek came back into the lab, his laptop tucked against his side. He saw Rodney still at his desk working away on something that he'd been trying to get to respond for the last two weeks.
He went over and set the laptop down on Rodney's desk and opened it up, "Here are the files form the meeting."
Rodney looked up, "Why don't you just email them to me?"
"The network is down," Radek said simply.
"What?" Rodney looked at his own laptop and realized it was true. "When did that happen?"
"Dr. Weir said it has been like this all morning. She cannot figure out why."
"Why aren't you working on the problem?"
"I am supposed to move into your office before I do anything else."
Rodney dropped his tools, "What?"
"Dr. Weir promoted me to Chief Science Officer, since you thought it was beneath you to attend meetings."
"She said that?!"
Radek shrugged, "She did not think you wanted your job any more."
"But she didn't say anything to me about it?"
"How could she? You have been here for two weeks. You have not even been down to ZPM room."
Rodney flushed. He'd just been trying to avoid John. Watching him be Kirk was one thing. Watching him have sex was another thing but he could stand it for the sake of a ZPM. Listening to other people talk about how John looked during sex and what they'd like to do with him if they could get their hands on him, was too much to handle.
"I'm going to talk with her."
"Colonel Sheppard said you would not like this," Radek watched as Rodney looked surprised.
"He didn't agree with her?"
"No."
He tried to ignore the happy feeling he got when he heard that but he sort of smiled any way, "Really?"
Radek nodded, "He said you were best person on Atlantis for the job and while I agreed with this, Elizabeth wanted someone who talked with the other Department Heads."
"I talk with her and Carson all the time."
"Not lately," Radek reminded him. "I think she and Dr. Beckett are still in the briefing room."
Rodney nodded to him, "Right…"
"How is that set of twins on the Mainland doing?" Elizabeth asked.
"Oh fine. I was planning on going out today and checkin' up on them."
"Good. I think I'll go with you."
Carson raised an eyebrow, "You want to ride with me?"
"You make it out there and back fine Carson."
"Aye but that's because it's usually only Teyla and I."
Elizabeth smiled at him, "I'm sure you'll do-"
"Elizabeth!" Rodney came walking into the briefing room slightly winded. "You gave Radek my job?!"
She raised an eyebrow, "Well he was doing all your work for you."
"He was not! I've been doing all of those reports that he brought to the meeting."
"So every time in the least few days he's come to me with some more information about things they've found in the city…you've sent him?"
Rodney deflated, "Well no. Not-I was busy working on something."
"Something so important no one but the people in your lab have seen you for the past two weeks?" she had used that voice she did when she was trying to point out to someone that their idea was laughable at best.
"You haven't even come to see me," Carson said. "No paper cuts, no head aches, no acid burns. Nothing."
"Less paper work for you," Rodney muttered.
"Aye, it is, but since when have you cared how much work it was for other people?"
"Never," Rodney grimaced. "Look I was-"
"You were hiding," Elizabeth finished for him. "But from what or whom I haven't figured out yet."
Rodney frowned. He was sure she'd gotten it when Sheppard had told her in the gate room about his fit of jealousy.
"Whatever it is that's bothering you. If you want your job back you're going to have to promise me you'll get over it…Today."
"Consider me over it," Rodney quickly said.
"Good. Now you better go tell Radek that he's back to being your second in command," she smiled at him.
Rodney nodded, "Right."
"Oh and Rodney?"
He stopped just outside the door and turned around, "Yes?"
"This can't happen again."
He gave her a shaky nod and then left.
Carson leaned back in his chair, to make sure Rodney was out of hearing distance, "Do you think he bought it?"
"Consciously? Yes. Unconsciously? Never in a million years."
"So you think he knows something is up?"
"Something to the effect we're doing. No. The only thing he knows is that we're ignoring he has a crush on Colonel Sheppard."
"Right…well…I'd best be off to ready myself for the second stage."
She smiled at him, "Me too."
Rodney came walking back into the lab only to see a cardboard box on his desk that said something in Czech on the side.
"Radek? What is this on my desk?"
Radek came from over by the where they had the Wraith Dart, "So it is still your desk?"
"Yes it's still my desk!"
"At least I can now say I was Chief Science Officer for little bit."
"And what did you get done? Nothing!"
"I only had the job for fifteen minutes!"
Rodney rolled his eyes, "I've saved the entire city in less time than that. You would have never lasted."
Radek pushed his glasses up his noise, "It is just as well you are back. Kavanagh is complaining again."
Grimacing Rodney looked back toward the Dart, "If I walk out of here, can you pretend that I haven't come back yet?"
The shorter man smiled and went behind him, pushing him toward the Dart, "Not for another ZPM."
"How about two?" Rodney asked, even as he walked back toward the Dart.
"Not even for device that creates them!"
Rodney smirked, "Figures."
Carson looked nervously at the shore of the Main Land that was coming slowly into view, "I don't think I can do this."
Teyla came forward, "You must."
Elizabeth was already strapped in, "We've already proven that the puddle jumpers can handle this Carson. You'll do fine."
He looked back over his shoulder at her, "You're not the one who has to crash into the ocean!"
"It is not deep here," Teyla assured him. "The bottom is smooth and sandy."
"Soft landing! I know!" He sighed looking miserable, "How do I let myself be talked into these things?"
"-waste of everyone's time! I don't even know why you're still here! You have no desire to be here and you worry more about your position than you do about the people you live with!"
Kavanagh pointed to some other scientist, " Like they do? Face it McKay! We're scientists! We're not here to protect anyone! We're here to research!"
"Oh so the last few times I've managed to save your sorry a-"
"Dr. McKay? "
Rodney frowned and hit his radio, "Can it wait?"
"I'm afraid not sir. You're needed in the control room. "
"Right. On my way," he focused back on Kavanagh, "Get back to whatever it was you were trying to do before."
"I refuse to work-"
Rodney turned back around, "Fine! Go back to your room then. Radek? Assign Dr. Kavanagh's project to someone that wants it. Thank you."
"You can't do that!"
Rodney ignored him and hurried to the nearest transporter.
"What's going on?"
Major Lorne looked away from the map that was displaying a stationary jumper, "We've got a problem."
"Let me rephrase my question. What do I need to fix?"
"The jumper that Dr. Beckett was flying out to the Main Land crashed into the ocean just off the coast."
Memories flooded his mind of the damaged jumper and the freezing cold water, "How long ago?"
"A few minutes. They're not responding to their radios, so either communications are damaged or-"
"They're unconscious," Rodney finished going over to a consol. "Is Teyla with him?"
"And Dr. Weir."
Rodney looked up, "Dr. Weir? What's she doing going to the Main Land?"
"She wanted to see the new twins," Lorne gave him a slight smile.
"Did he radio anything was wrong before he went down?" a map of the area they'd crashed into came up on screen.
"No. That's why we think communications are down."
Rodney nodded, "Good news is the water where they've crashed seems to be shallow. Bad news is the currents are fast around that area."
"We need to get another Jumper out to them," Lorne said looking at the speed of the currents, "They could be pushed farther away or covered with debris from the ocean floor before we get there."
"Well I'll need a pilot," as the words left Rodney's mouth he knew he should have just gone and got a Jumper himself. Of course someone would have to stabilize the Jumper and keep it in position while he tried to figure out how to fix the other. That was, if Carson, Elizabeth and Teyla were alright. "Sheppard."
Lorne looked surprised, "I thought you were mad at him."
Rodney frowned, "Do I look mad at him? Where is he any way?"
"Actually you do -"
"Colonel Sheppard?" Rodney asked into his radio.
Lorne just sighed.
"Yes McKay? "
"I need you in the Jumper bay A.S.A.P. Beckett crashed into the ocean. We need to go on a rescue mission."
There was silence for a few seconds, "Why wasn't I informed before? Where's Lorne? "
"Beside me. Look, you can punish him later. Elizabeth and Teyla are in the Jumper with him and the currents around where they are, are very strong. We need to get out to them as soon as possible."
"Right. On my way. "
Elizabeth and Carson jumped as something heavy hit the outside of the jumper. He had been cleaning a cut on her lip when the noise scared him and he pushed into her lip harder than he meant to with the swab. She gently pushed away his hands, "I'm fine Carson."
"I'm terribly sorry! I haven't got used to things crashing into the sides. I told you I wasn't any good at this sort of thing!"
"At least we know there is help on the way," Teyla smiled slightly. Carson had had to pop her shoulder back into the socket. Her arm was now in a sling.
He looked toward the front of the jumper and saw only the faintest glimpse of the ocean at the very right hand corner of the window, "At least it looks unintentional."
Elizabeth smiled, "There's that."
"And the radio's down, so not calling in the crash won't look suspicious either."
"No it won't," Elizabeth agreed.
"I just hope this works," Carson stood up and paced back and forth in the small confines of the jumper. "Because I'm not doing it again!"
Teyla got to her feet and rested the hand of her good arm on his, "If this does not work the Colonel is on his own."
"Yes he is," Elizabeth muttered.
Something else hit the side of the Jumper making them all jump.
"And he owes us all one too," she grumbled.
John looked over at McKay nervously. They'd got McKay back into his old socialization pattern, if you could call yelling at the scientists that worked under him socialization. Carson had crashed the jumper and McKay had even asked for him to pilot a Jumper for him out to the crash site.
The problem was he didn't know what to do now. God he was really bad at this…
"So…"
McKay looked up from his data pad, "What?"
"What's the plan?"
"I can't have a plan until I see how the Jumper is crashed."
John sighed. Why couldn't Rodney be like all the other people that had crushes on them and just throw themselves at him? "I haven't uh…seen you around lately…"
Rodney raised his head and gave him the most murderous look John remembered seeing come from him, "Really?"
"Kinda missed havin' you around."
"Yes. Sorry for raining on your smug parade Colonel. I had more important things to worry about than making sure you got to rub my mistakes in my face."
This wasn't going at all like he planned. Of course nothing ever went how he planned it, "That's not what-"
"Look. Just shut up and fly."
"Dr. Beckett? This is Rodney. Please respond if you can."
"Oh thank God!" Carson tapped his radio, "Beckett here. We're all fine…for the most part."
"For the most part? " John's voice came over the radio, "What the hell happened?! "
"I don't know! I was just flying!"
"It…was almost like the jumper controls wouldn't…respond to him," Elizabeth cut in.
"Dr. Weir. Good to hear from you," Rodney said.
"Can you see any way to get us out?" Teyla asked.
"Not at the moment. Water isn't getting in there is it?"
"No. We're fine Rodney. We just need to get out of here."
"Working on that. It seems that a lot of debris from the ocean floor has covered the rear end of the jumper and the access panel. Even if I currents weren't as strong as they are it would be hard for me to fix anything out there."
Elizabeth got up and walked to the back of the jumper, "What about extending the shield out like you did before?"
Rodney's frustrated voice came over the radio again, "When I say a lot of debris, I mean a lot. We brought the modified Jumper with just that in mind but even if we could extend the shield around you, things would only build up around and on the shield. When we turned it off it would drop everything down on top of us, which could trap all of us down here. Besides that I highly doubt we could move most of what's blocking your rear hatch."
Weir frowned, "Are you being hit by anything?"
"No. I'm dodging out of the way of the big stuff," Sheppard said calmly.
"So what do you suggest we do?" She asked looking into space.
Rodney was quiet for a moment.
"Rodney?"
"We're going to need back up. I'm going to radio Atlantis back and have them send out another jumper with marines to help move all this stuff, and a generator. Once they get out here I'll hook the generator up to the shield, so we have more time. Once you're out of there I'll make repairs and get your jumper working again."
"But how will that help? You said that the debris from the ocean current would just pile up on the shield."
"It will, but with the generator we can keep the shield extended shield on while we move."
"So you're suggesting that we fly the jumpers in…a formation? Right along the ocean's surface and up onto the Mainland?"
"That's the idea yes."
"That's a terrible idea!" Carson said into his radio.
"I'm sure the Colonel will fly slowly enough for you to keep up," even from the sound of his voice you could tell he was rolling his eyes.
There's a terrible moment when Rodney stops working on the Puddle Jumper and looks up from his data pad at Carson who had been helping move debris from the top of the Jumper.
John knows Rodney knows. He just doesn't know how much he knows besides that Carson purposely did a nosedive into the ocean. The way he's watching the doctor though, he probably thinks he's a Goa'uld.
Rodney looked up at him then, "Colonel can you come over here for a minute please?"
Elizabeth who had been helping move some of the smaller stuff away from the jumper, shot a worried look to John and then to Carson. Now she knows that Rodney knows, and she's trying her damnedest to make her way unnoticed over to Carson to tell him he's probably going to be accused of being compromised in about five minutes.
"Sure."
Rodney moves toward the front of Jumper as John comes in and closes the bulkhead doors, "I think Carson tried to kill Elizabeth and Teyla."
Straight to the point as always, "Come on McKay. This is CARSON we're talking about here. He doesn't even like to kill the Wraith."
Rodney turned his data pad around so John could see. It showed a dot flying and then all of a sudden it dipped down and then came back up again and then went down lower and then up again and finally it did a noise dive, "He tried to kill them."
"Maybe there was some kind of pulse that-"
"There was nothing. The only damage the Jumper reports, is after it crashed. I think he might be a member of the trust."
John grimaced because he couldn't let Carson go through something like they did to Kavanagh, "Rodney. It's my fault."
"You're the reason he's a member of the Trust?"
"No! He's not a member of the damn Trust! He crashed the Jumper because I asked him to."
Rodney stared at him, "You asked him to crash a Jumper into the ocean while Elizabeth and Teyla were on board? Right, Colonel. The next thing you're going to tell me is that it was Teyla's idea."
John lowered his eyes and picked at his wrist band for a moment.
"Oh please tell me you're joking!"
And he really wished he could.
"Can you explain to me why you thought that this was a good idea?!"
"I couldn't think of any other way and when Teyla gave -"
Rodney's eyes widened, "You mean to tell me it really was Teyla's idea? And what were you trying to do? Make sure I could still do my job?"
"I wanted you to stop ignoring me!"
McKay stared at him for a long time before he quietly started to talk, "You mean you did all of this…just to get me to work with you again? Do you have idea how dangerous this was?! What if the Jumper would have landed sideways? Some of that debris could have smashed through the Jumper's window and killed them all!"
And John really hadn't thought about that until now and he blushed, "We didn't know the current was this strong."
"Why?"
John looked up at the soft words, "Why what?"
"Why'd you go to this much trouble?"
"Because you were avoiding everyone else just to avoid me and it…hurt," he finished lamely.
"It did?"
John nodded.
"Oh…well…uh-"
"I thought you…and then you…but I couldn't-" John stopped himself mid-word and gave Rodney a miserable look.
"OH!" Because Rodney had finally got it.
"And I'm really…REALLY bad at this stuff."
"Well…uh," Rodney swallowed, "maybe we can be bad at it together? Hmm? I mean if that's what you meant by…What I'm saying is, that if I'm totally getting this wrong you can just-"
And John kissed him, because it was one of the things about this he wasn't bad at and Rodney seemed like he wasn't too bad at this part either.
When he'd come to the Stargate Program there were a lot of things he hadn't known he was supposed to know about. He still likes to complain about that fact to certain people too.
Of course one of those people is his boyfriend. An arrogant, petty and bad with people boyfriend, who he loves more than anyone else he's ever been with in his entire life.
It really does all make sense now though why O'Neill wrote him that note with phrases like, 'Your geeks will save your life', 'Might not be what you really wanted', and 'I wouldn't be surprised if fell for one' when he was really bad at saying that kind of stuff himself.
Dr. Weir had smiled and raised an eyebrow when they'd come and told her the good news though, "Thank you for telling me but…John…This is another one of those things I really didn't need to know…"