"Do I have to wear this?" Kurt looked at the scrap of material in his hand then at his reflection in the mirror.
"You promised!" was his wife's reply from the bedroom.
"But Diane, it's….well…there's not much to it!" the flimsy scrap of material in his hand wasn't much bigger than a glove, and it was supposed to go there?
"What did you expect?"
Kurt considered his wife's reply. What did he expect? He promised to dress up for one of her fantasies. He just didn't expect this.
"I, uh, expected something else." He called to her.
"You don't have to wear it for very long. C'mon, please?" When Diane received no reply, she added "I'm wearing something that matches it!"
That raised Kurt's eyebrows. If his outfit had very little to it, what the hell could she be wearing? Pasties?
"Give me a minute" was his response to his waiting wife. He looked at the picture of the wrapping then at the neon green material in his hand. This was her fantasy? Well, what the hell, make her happy, right? He stepped into the stretchy material contraption, tucked himself in, and looked at his ridiculous attire. Here goes nothing.
Diane was on her knees on the bed, wearing nothing but a pink cowgirl hat, a toy gun in a holster and white cowgirl boots. As she heard the bedroom door open, in a seductive tone asked, "hey, cowboy, could you…." but she never finished the phrase. Instead, all hear husband heard was a peal of laughter from his wife.
Kurt looked down at his goofy attire and couldn't help but laugh as well. What did she really expect? It left nothing to the imagination and it was ridiculous.
His wife, in tears and fits of laughter wriggling on the bed finally managed "what the hell are you wearing?"
"what do you mean, 'what the hell am I wearing?' This is your fantasy, how the hell should I know what I'm wearing?"
His wife lost it again, laughter echoing throughout their bedrooms. Kurt stormed back into the bathroom and got the packaging to his man sack cover. Walking back into the bedroom he read it to her, it's called a "schlong thong."
"and you…" she giggled again and sat back up on the bed "you put this on, just for me?" her finger rimmed the neon green material.
"I put it on because you asked me to."
Diane raised to her knees in front of her husband. "I didn't order this for you." She kissed his cheek. "I ordered you assless chaps, cowboy."
Kurt smirked, "well, they got the assless part right."