Itunes, shuffle, Bianca/Zoe slash, Rated M for mature themes.
Gotta Get Thru This - (Daniel Bedingfield)
(I gotta get thru this…When your love is pouring like the rain I close my eyes and its gone again when will I get the chance to say "I love you?" I pretend that you're already mine then my heart ain't breaking every time I look into your eyes….)
They're in different places to one another in every sense. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. They always have been. The smaller, dark haired girl with the fringe covering her eyes, can no longer meet those of of the taller, louder one.
Although constantly teasing, pushing, pulling, (and the mild occasional flirty comment) has gone on between them, no matter how much Bianca provokes Zoe, prods her, insults her, calls her names, which is no more than normal, Zoe has stopped reacting to her.
That's NOT like her - she has a sharp tongue (and an even sharper skill with chinese burns). But in that unknown place inside her, where sat once anger, once depression, negativity, there is now something that has replaced the sadness - not all of it - something completely new and different, very different indeed. Something unfamiliar that lurks in the air and surrounds her, choking her. She can't breathe knowing it. She hates the feeling, she doesn't recognise it at first, but it hits her like a ton of bricks - and that is physical and emotional attraction.
In the physics classroom, Bianca watches as Zoe messes about with the electric chair at the front; the way her eyes slide to the side - only an hour ago they had been trying to strangle one another, and now, now, she can't tear her eyes away. What's happening to her?
Bianca feels a sudden rush of attraction for Zoe that is so strong, she is forced to look away and uncomfortably plays with the ends of her long, black hair, heart thudding in her ears. From then on, there is an elephant in the room, a series of never-ending thoughts that bug both of them most nights, that they try so hard to ignore.
They see each other in the dorm, later on, after tea. Bianca, sat away from her usual gang, and completely withdrawn from them, lost in thought, looks at Zoe, who is crossing the room to emerge to the Emo Den. Zoe looks back momentarily, her mouth a stubborn line, and then walks through the black curtains with an air of drama. Unlike Bianca, she will NOT accept into her head these confusing new thoughts that give her shudders from head to toe whenever the rude girl does so much as cross her path. She snaps at some of the younger emo's to leave her alone, and closes the black skull curtains that surround her bed with such force that they clatter to the floor, leaving her in the open, in full view.
Tomorrow Never Knows - (The Beatles)
(Turn off your mind relax and float down stream, It is not dying, Lay down all thoughts, surrender to the void, it is shining, Yet you may see the meaning of within, it is being. Love is all and love is everyone, it is knowing.)
Zoe leans back against the tree, in the grounds of the school. It is past midnight. She can hear owls, she can feel the moonlight pouring down on her. She re-lights the end of her spliff, closes her eyes, crosses her black stockinged legs and breaths out the smoke upwards so that it ever so softly ruffles her hair. She does not know that she is being watched.
Bianca, wearing only a vest top and her girl boxers, peers out of the dorm window, the sound of even breathing of her school mates surrounding her. Lucy mumbles something in her sleep about fractions, rolls over, continues snoring softly. Bianca gets it, finally. Gets what she's been trying to ignore for weeks.
She's in love.
Love is all around her, but she has never felt love like she is feeling it now. She wonders if its this that has been writhing and thrashing in her system for so long, the reason why her attitude became so bad and she became such a horrible, nasty person. Because she liked girls. But never, ever has she liked a girl this much.
She leans her forehead against the window, cooling herself down. What's stopping her from going down there, anyway? She looks around.
Nothing.
Quickly, pulling on her skirt and her school shoes, she leaves the dormitory, door closing softly behind her. Once outside in the middle of the shadows, she becomes uneasy for the first time. Zoe hasn't noticed her yet. When she does, she turns and even Bianca fails to miss the look on her face. Is that unease? Uncertainty? Is she smiling? She breathes out. Bianca carefully walks up to her and sits beside her. "You alright, Zo?"
She has never called Zoe by her name in her life. Its usually, you alright, freak? You alright, sulky sun dodger? You alright, bitch?
"Yeah, I guess," Zoe whispers, and her soft voice sends a shiver down Bianca's spine. They don't talk for a minute or so, just breathing in their sudden, unknown found respect for one another. Zoe passes the spliff to Bianca. "You want some?"
Bianca hesitates, then takes it, leaning against the tree with Zoe. "Hell, why not? You only live once, don't ya?"
They both look away at that moment, and unbeknown to the other, they each smile a smile that only they know the meaning of.
Brighter than Sunshine
(I never understood before, I never knew what love was for, my heart heart was broke my head was sore what a feeling, Tied up in ancient history, I didn't believe in destiny, look at whose standing next to me what a feeling. What a feeling, in my soul, love burns brighter than sunshine, its brighter than sunshine, let the rain fall I don't care, I'm yours and suddenly your mine, and suddenly your mine. And it's brighter than sunshine.)
The first time Zoe and Bianca kiss, it isn't with the softness and the shyness of what you might think a first kiss was. No, it takes place in the dark, the following night, under the same tree, but this time, there is no need for any drugs, no need for any polite conversations. They fall on each other like hungry wolves, grabbing each others hair, moaning, tongues exploring each other's mouths. Zoe digs her nails into Bianca's back and allows Bianca to roll on top of her, and as they kiss, they softly rub themselves against each another, each ravenous for the other's touch.
Bianca opens her eyes for a couple of seconds and runs her hand through Zoe's hair, loving it that they can feel one another smiling, loving the butterflies that are going crazy in her stomach, loving. Just loving.
They both gasp for air when the kiss ends, and take each other's hands. "I'm crazy about you," Bianca whispers. "And I'm not used to doing this at all but - do you want to go out with me?"
Zoe hesitates, even though her stomach jolts at the question. Trying to stop shaking, she strokes Bianca's hair, takes her chin in her hands, and kisses her lightly again. The question does not need to be answered in any other way than it already has been. "I want a proper relationship," Bianca explains, pulling away finally to catch her breath. "I don't do shagging them and leaving them, you know? I don't do that to…." she breathes out, "people."
"There will be obstacles," Zoe says finally, holding Bianca tightly. "But we will get through them. I promise." And she knows, deep down, where there is a ray or so of hope, she knows, hopes, that she is right.
They kiss and cuddle until dawn.
No Sleep Tonight - the Faders
I got you, I got you on my mind, and its time to make you see, so I'll just make this, a little more obvious, cause I get what I want and I want you to get with me. Can't stop this feeling, can't run away, baby I'm whats on your mind. Cant stop this feeling, there's no escape, you won't get no sleep tonight).
The first time they have sex, its something Zoe certainly isn't used to; and that's a certain form of paradise.
With her having bi-polar disorder, (and, at one time, her doctor questioned whether or not she had schizophrenia), she has had her fair share of low moods. The immediate switch to high ones are never quite as high as she would like. But here, in Bianca's arms, she is feeling new experiences which she did not know how to deal with.
Last week, safely in the shadows of her bed, with lights off, she had slipped a hand in her black skull hot pants, after the kiss they had shared, and she had touched herself, tingling with excitement.
It hadn't been long before her arm was grasping the pillow behind her, and she playing with herself with furious intensity, biting her lips to stop herself from crying out and waking anyone else, but just as she had been aroused enough to come, she had stopped herself, which was probably the most frustrating thing she had ever done.
But no, she wants her first orgasm to be given to her with her first girlfriend. And this is it.
She lies underneath Bianca, with her skirt up and her knickers down in the empty dorm. As she is softly caressed, it is not long before Zoe feels that intensity that she felt the other night. She lifts up her legs, and she is suddenly biting her fist to stop herself from screaming. Surrounded by the black curtains, Bianca and Zoe have sex for hours, until they can no longer. One after the other, then both at the same time; they can't stop -its - frantic.
It's delicious,
it's…..perfection.
Coldplay - Yes
(When it started we had high hopes
Now my back's on the line
My back's on the ropes, When it started we were alright, But night makes a fool of us in the daylight. Then we were dying of frustration, Saying Lord lead me not into temptation, But it's not easy when she turns you on, Sin, stay gone).
They've been seeing one another, in a relationship, for eight weeks when the harsh rumors start and won't stop, the pushing and shoving, the crude comments, the shrieks of hysterical laughter whenever their hands so much as touch. Most of Bianca's friends have stopped talking to her- most of Zoe's - though seemingly not too bothered that she is gay - winding her up about "doing a chav." No matter how much they try to ignore it, mostly Bianca, who gets so ferocious with a couple of shrieking first years on the staircase one morning that she reduces them to tears, Zoe finds it harder and harder to deal with. It reminds her of when she was a child - when the "freak" comments started, when her mood swings became unbearable. It's not long before she's avoiding holding Bianca's hand, avoiding snuggling up to her in the dorm, avoiding sneaking to her bed, and when the only moments they get together are the odd stolen kiss (and sometimes more) under the tree in the gardens at two o'clock in the morning. Though she is crazy about Bianca, something has to give. And finally, after twelve weeks, she's reached breaking point.
She said - Plan B
(She said I love you, I love you so, she said I love you baby oh oh oh oh oh,
So I said, what you saying girl it can't be right, can't be in love with me, so she said, I loved you from the start, when I first heard love goes down something started burning in my heart, I said stop this crazy talk, leave right now and close the door. She said but I love you, I love you so, she said I love you baby oh oh oh oh oh. She said I love you more than words can say, she said I love you baby eh).
"But…why?"
The tears are brimming in Bianca's eyes and beginning to pour down her cheeks without her even realising it. She scrubs at her eyes furiously and looks away.
Zoe's head is bent. "I'm sorry. We both know it was just a fling…it's not going to work out." She hates herself more than she thought she would for doing this.
Bianca puts both hands over her face and begins to cry properly - heartbroken. Zoe's gaze is hard, cold, distant, but inside she's burning up. She feels sick. "If it's meant to be, its meant to be," she says finally. "But right now - I'm drawing a line in the sand and it can't be crossed again. I want you as one of my best friends. But that's all."
Its killing her to do this, killing them both - Bianca tries to be brave, they both are. They stand looking at one another for a while longer, both lost for words.
"But I'm in love with you," Bianca whispers finally.
Zoe goes paler than usual. No, she can't hear this - no, this is why she does this - she doesn't like getting close to people - it terrifies her. She's never heard this before - she doesn't want to hear this - she backs away. "In love? Bianca…that's really..that's stupid...it's been six weeks...…" and there's unease in her shaky voice.
Bianca shakes her head in desperation, before turning around and storming out of the dorm, slamming the door so hard that the hinges rattle. "Headfuck!" she snarls, her voice full of emotion. That word affects Zoe in two different ways. First, power. Secondly, it cuts her to shreds.
She follows Bianca's example and storms off in the opposite direction - across to the emo den. "Get out of my way!" she snarls to two innocent first years.
With a swish of the black duvet door, Zoe throws herself down onto her bed and buries her head under the pillow. Guilt eats her inside out.
Everybody Hurts - REM
Bianca breaks down in her best friend Jessica's arms, and not for the first time. Jess strokes her hair, rocks her, kisses the top of her forehead. "I'm sorry…I'm so sorry, she whispers repeatedly. Bianca can hardly hear her over her own reckless sobs. She can hardly breathe for crying. "I can't live without her, Jess. I can't!"
"I know," Jess says softly, but she doesn't, because no matter how much, how hard she is trying, she can't understand love and lust between two women. Jess is as straight as a pole and has never so much as had a crush on another female. Not yet, anyway. Without the feelings Bianca is suffering, Jess is confused, uncomfortable, ignorant. But it isn't her fault. Not at all. She is trying. And that's all she can do. She pulls Bianca onto her bed and rocks her, continues rocking her, until Bianca's sobs become a slight snuffle. Bianca is in pain, and a lot of it. Right at this moment, she doesn't believe time will heal. Doesn't believe there is a way out of it. There is no one else in the dorm except Bianca, Jessica, and a couple of Emos. The Emos, as usual, are avoiding the Rude Girls as much as possible at the other end of the dorm.
One of them laughs, too loudly, not necessarily at Bianca, not even necessarily at anything to do with Bianca, but Bianca is on her feet, and without completely realising what she's doing until it's too late, she's trashing the dorm. Ripping clothes out of wardrobes. Pulling pillows off beds. Smashing the TV from the wall onto the floor. "Bianca!" Jess stands up and puts an arm out to try and stop her best friend, but she can't. Instead, she puts her hand over her mouth, close to tears, and does nothing but watch with horror as Bianca loses even more than she's just lost. Her temper, and her self respect. Someone else walks into the dorm, but Bianca neither sees nor hears them - she's too far gone, screaming, eyes flashing with rage and hurt, until the two hands take her by the shoulders and turn her around, and Bianca falls, sobbing her heart out, into the gentle and understanding, experienced arms of Camilla Fritton.
Please Don't let me Go - Olly Murs
(Where do I begin? Should I tell you how bad I need you now? Your underneath my skin, and I'm confused, my head is spinning all around, whoa oh. I waited so long, I need to know, darlin, what is on your mind?
and normally i try to run, and I might even wanna hide, cause I never knew what i wanted, until I looked into your eyes, so am I in this alone? What i'm looking for inside, that i feel how I feel for you - baby please don't let me go. Baby please don't let me go, please don't let me go..no, no, no, no.)
What has she DONE?
Ever since Bianca has left St Trinians, there is a lot of hate aimed at Zoe - mostly from the fellow chavs and rude girls, particularly Taylor and Jessica, who were the closest to her. They have changed their tune immensely.
They give her filthy looks everywhere she goes, and hiss insults at her until Zoe has had enough and pins them both by their throats - one in each hand - to the corridor wall. "Shut up," she hisses - they look at each other in horrified panic and struggle, but she is an extremely strong girl considering she's much smaller than the both of them. "You think I don't know what I've done to her? You think I don't regret it every single fucking day?"
She releases them and they rub their throats ruefully, glaring at her. "She loved you, you stupid cow," Taylor gasps. "Do you ever realise that?"
"Of course i do," Zoe snaps. "But she's gone. And I made the biggest mistake of my life -"
"You should let her know, you know," Jessica, not as hostile as Taylor, exclaims. She reaches out and touches Zoe on the wrist - Zoe flinches - unable to bear anyone touching her where her previous scars are - even though they are well hidden. With horror, she realizes that there is a lump in her throat. She hares off to the toilet and locks herself in a cubicle, suddenly realising exactly how miserable she is.
Romeo and Juliet- Dire Straights
Neither of them have ever felt so alone. Particularly Zoe - who is isolated by most of her school pals (who have come to terms with the fact that she isn't going to cheer up.) She's not eating, hardly sleeping, not even wearing any kohl or eyeliner, and she looks strangely naked without her make up, strangely small and helpless. She sits alone, is smoking two or three joints a day, and cries herself to sleep every single night.
Similarly Bianca, who barely bothers to leave her dorm at the new school she has been transferred to, hasn't made many friends and finds that most of the girls at Lakehouse are snobby and boy obsessed, and think she has a bad attitude. She is wrecked by night terrors, and wakes up in cold sweats every morning. She, too, can't eat properly - everything tastes dry in her mouth, and it feels like there is a rock in her stomach. She has written to Zoe once, using most of the lyrics from the Dire Straights song they kept playing. Romeo and Juliet, she thought it was called.
She got the following reply.
Dear Bianca,
There's a place for us. When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong?
I'm sorry.
SIX YEARS LATER
Thinking of Me- Olly Murs
Time has changed. Feeling's have grown, cleared, returned, gone away. Bianca finds it unusual that she has fallen helpless to the charms of a boy she has met at her previous job - her manager, Billy. Even more surprisingly, she finds that he feels the same way. This is, however, nothing compared to the feelings she has learnt best to ignore over the years.
"There's something I need to tell you," Bianca told her Billy, one night at their new flat. "Something I never told you before." She had hoped it would never come to this, but she couldn't hold it in any longer.
Billy ran a hand through his grade two black hair and smiled up at Bianca with a softness he could only find for her. Like Bianca, Billy was half cast and beautiful - with the greenest eyes Bianca had ever seen since….she couldn't do this any more.
Billy was tough kid on the block, and always had been. Bianca sat next to him and put her legs up on his. He shifted his hand up her skirt towards her pants, but she pushed it away. "I'm serious."
Billy's smile faded, but he still wasn't taking her seriously. "Babe! You walking around like that, its killing me!"
"When I was at school," Bianca said, twiddling her thumbs, "I was in love."
"Right." Billy looked confused. And then he got it. "With one of your teachers, or sommat? Cause they were all girls…."
Bianca smiled across the black leather couch at him. "With another girl."
Billy's eyes lit up, and a grin spread across his face. "You do her? Get photos? Got any?"
"Yeah," Bianca said softly, a warm feeling spreading through her blood, clashing wildly with the pang of anger she felt at Billy's less than tactful comments. "We did, on a regular basis. We dated for six...for a while, anyway." She silently scolded herself - six weeks, and she was still head over heels? Zoe had been right. It DID sound stupid.
"And what happened?" Billy frowned. "How come you never told me this before?"
"Why didn't you think?" she frowned. "I was scared. You always tell me how unnatural you think gay people are -" there was a very pregnant pause. "But I'm not holding that image for you any more, Billy. Not going to pretend. Her name was Zoe."
Billy held his hands up as if in defense. "Okay, babe. I got it."
"I had to tell you."
Billy pulled her towards him, holding her tightly. He nuzzled her hair. "I'm glad you told me babe. I'm proud of you."
Bianca nodded curtly.
"So what went wrong?" he continued softly.
"She -ended it. Just knew, deep down, that however intense the attraction to one another was, it wasn't going to work out. There were too many obstacles. We cut contact when I left school. It wasn't easy." She was horrified to feel her eyes brim over. She looked away. She felt uneasy.
Walk of Life - Dire Straights
Bianca will always remember Zoe's last words to her. "One day, if it's meant to be, then it's meant to be." The last time their hands touched.
Each night, she is still cursed by night terrors, torn apart by dreams that her lips are on Zoe's again. Heartbroken to wake up and discover that the one next to her is the wrong one. She loves Billy, but it doesn't feel right. He's a best friend, and she'd be lost without him. But, and she knew it wasn't his fault, sex with him was vile. Sex with him felt unnatural.
And one Friday night, Billy takes her hand, when Bianca is sobbing with her head under the pillow.
"Look at me baby," he says softly.
She looks at him eventually, feeling horrible and guilty. "I know what your heart seeks," he whispers, holding her tightly. He gives her one last squeeze. "And I know it's not me. I know who the one for you is."
She takes a deep breath, nuzzles her head in his chest. She cant speak - her body rocks with sobs. He kisses the top of her head, strokes it. "Bianca. I've known you for years. I know when you're happy. I know when your sad. And I'm not making you happy. I hate to say it. I know you've always loved her. I know I can never be her. It didn't make sense to me - until you told me. I wish you good luck. I'll always love you."
And with that, Billy climbs out of the double bed, giving her one last kiss on the forehead. He turned around at the door, not bothering to wipe the tears away from his eyes. He doesn't even so much as speak, or breathe.
He leaves.
Personal Jesus - Marilyn Manson
From: biancarudegirl
To: emozo
Subject: xxx
Hey babe. Um…it's been a while. Hope ur ok.
I can't stop thinking about u, Zoe. Maybe I should. But I can't.
Just to let u kno, I'm down your end this weekend…on saturday nite I will b at ur favourite club. The Dark Rock Underground Club, on Friday nite, from 8.30pm. I'll b wearing a short black dress. I have to see you. If there is any chance that u wanna c me, then please come.
I'm not asking for you to fall in love with me all over again, Zoe.
Shit. This is all coming out wrong. But honesty is best policy, and I've missed u, girl. So get ur arse down there, yeah?
Hope to see you. Fingers crossed. I'll wait until 3am for you, if I have to. And if your still not there…then I know. And I will leave you alone for good.
Love, Bianca xoxoxox
Zoe's heart had been beating so hard when she first read the email, she thought it was going to burst. She gripped the sides of her really-badly-on-its-way-out laptop, the screen flashing different colours and the mouse going berserk, in the darkness of her bedroom, and before she knew it, she was crying.
Oh, my God. She hadn't cried like this in her life. She wasn't crying because she was sad.
She was overjoyed.
Friday was three days away. After Zoe had slept on it, she woke up on the Wednesday, and thought "I can't go." She lay in her black silk bedsheets wearing her skinny black skull pyjamas, and biting her thumb. "I really can't.." She changed her mind an hour after that, and again the following hour.
By Friday morning, she had made up her mind.
In the Flesh - Low Shoulder (Jennifer's Body soundtrack)
Darling, darling darling, I can't wait to see you; your picture ain't enough, I can't wait to touch you in the flesh. Darling, darling darling, I can't wait to hear you, remembering your love, there's nothing without you in the flesh).
Zoe started getting ready from three in the afternoon. She went to the hairdressers, had her orange streaks, which had now faded back to blond completely, re-done. She went into town and bought herself a H&R black Vintage dress and a new pair of Abbey Dawn Wild Child Boots (her old ones were rather scuffed). By the time she had come home, bathed, and dressed, it was six o'clock. She put her make up on in the bathroom, and walked downstairs to see her parents.
"You look beautiful, darling," her mother kissed the top of her head. "Where are you going?"
"To meet some other dyke," her eight year old brother Adam didn't turn around from his X-Box 360 to even glance at his sister.
"Shut up, Adam," their mother hissed. "You look gorgeous," she added, giving Zoe a kiss on the forehead. "When will you be back?"
"After twelve," Zoe told her. "I think that my mate might be staying over. That's who I'm going to see."
"Which…mate?" asked her mother quietly, at the front door. "It's not another blind date is it, Zoe? I do worry so about you meeting these women."
"It's not a blind date mum." And now Zoe truly couldn't keep the smile off her face. "It's an old friend of mine."
Zoe appreciated that her mother cared. But just now, similar to an itch between her shoulders that couldn't be reached without the aid of another, it was irritating her deeply and she had to get out.
She reached the Dark Rock Club eventually, feeling like she was trapped in the odd reality of a strange new direction of the universe as she stepped out of the taxi, as though everything was in slow motion, as though nothing was real, hardly recognizing the place although she had spent countless weekends down here, her tongue down the throat of some faceless girl. There had been tonnes - a lot of women found her attractive - but none had given her that spark.
Zoe felt as though the club door was moving further away as she got closer to it - the glass handle beneath her hand felt too hot, the air too smoky, the bouncers voices too faded, too far away. Why was she so nervous? She had, at one point, spent every Friday night in here. Oh yes, she was EXTREMELY popular in here. Most of the girls she picked up on a weekend - not that she was proud of this - were besotted with her and wouldn't leave her alone afterwards. She breathed up through the fringe, feeling suddenly sick and dizzy.
The stairs were too steep, and the air was too warm. The music sounded as though it were underwater - though she could barely hear it beneath the distant rhythm of her heart. Zoe took the metal stair rail under her black gloved hand and took the stairs as gracefully as she could. She looked up when she got to the bottom, and headed automatically towards the bar. Her new slo-mo universe slowed down even further as she saw the girl two bar stools down, the girl that's hair now touched her lower back, the beautiful half cast girl that was wearing a black cocktail dress and tights, and heels that were ridiculous, the girl that was supping a Long Island Iced Tea with none of the boisterous masculinity that she used to try and show off with in front of Zoe when they were drinking in bars. There wasn't a hint of that girl now. Bianca turned, and saw Zoe. Zoe thought she would die. Awkwardly, she tucked a stray chunk of hair behind her ear.
Bianca's eyes filled with tears.
Chains - Tina Arena (Reprise)
Far from the noisiness of Rock music coming from Zoe's favourite bar, the two girls walked down the streets of London, side by side. They had not yet spoken. Zoe had held her hand out to take Bianca's, to take her away from the Dark Rock. They had turned as one and left the club, and now, here they were, heading down the street. Wordlessly, silently, Zoe chose another place - a completely different place. A small bar on the corner, that was just starting to liven up. After getting drinks, they retreated, still not speaking, to the black leather couch in the corner of the bar. They sat, sipping their drinks, each thinking in her own mind "For Gods sake, just say something."
Right then, a song began to play. A song that sent shivers down each of their spines. A song that had haunted them both for years. Others had noticed, others had hit the dance floor to swirl slowly with their partners. Others had noticed that soft bass, that equally soft voice, that lovely beat that rolled in perfectly with the introduction.
Zoe and Bianca moved together to the dance floor, and once there, their eyes met properly for the second time that evening.
"Your arms are warm, but they make me feel,
As if they're made of cold, cold steel,
A simple kiss, like a turning key,
A little click, and the lock's on me."
Bianca's arms moved automatically to Zoe's waist, Zoe's to Bianca's shoulder, and she leaned her head on Bianca's other shoulder as they began to sway, swirl, with that lovely song surrounding them, that song that meant nothing to anyone else but them at that time. This is how they stayed for the majority of it. But when their track reached it's glorious peak, when it really began to mean something, when artist started to let herself go a little, her beautiful soft voice crescendoing to it's maximum emotional confrontation to the person that the song was delivered to, Bianca brushed her lips across Zoe's forehead, and that was it. They were kissing like it was their first time all over again. Kissing as though they had never kissed before. Bianca was pulling at the back of Zoe's hair with urgent, clenched fists, and Zoe's hands were sliding down to Bianca's waist, sending sparks of electricity pounding through her.
"Should have known, passing through the gate..
Once inside, I could not escape,
I never thought
This would happen to me,
Never thought this is where I'd be,
but baby, baby….baby baby look at me,
I'm in chains…"
The kiss lasted for much longer than the song did. By the time the two girls parted, breathlessly, both pink in the cheeks with desire, "Waterloo" by ABBA was pounding through the stereo, at precisely two minutes into the song, and the surrounding crowd on the dance floor's moves were very different indeed, clapping their hands and shifting their feet from side to side, mostly people older than the two girls.
"I'll never leave you again," Zoe promised, holding Bianca in the hotel later that night, both of them stripped down to their underwear. "All that shit at school…all that's behind us now, right?" she gazed down, worried slightly, but all Bianca could do was trace the shape of her lips with one gentle finger, and put it to Zoe's mouth before they kissed again, a kiss that wouldn't be broken for a very long time.
Walking on Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves
This is the song that is played at their civil partnership three years later.
This is their wedding dance.
This is the song that will bring them into their foreseeable future, and this is the song they will both dance to privately in their living room when the curtains are closed and the lamps are on and the wine is being poured.
This is the song they will play on their iPods when they are away from one another on business conferences or otherwise, for it reminds each of the other.
Both of the girls' children will be conceived between themselves, with courtesy of Billy, who is now one of their best friends. Billy has met Zoe many times, and he adores her. There is not one streak of jealousy between the two of them.
Zoe will give birth to their first son two years after their civil partnership, and Bianca will follow a close second, with their youngest.
Harry and Michael will be very beautiful children, and equally beautiful as they grow up surrounded by love and care, respectful of other's differences. They will have the most precious life - as they see and are given the most precious gifts in ones life - love.
If you ever happen across this family, you will see how perfectly they fit together.
Life is very beautiful.