A/N~~~ so I don't know if I'm going to leave this as a one shot or continue, it really depends on what you guys think. So, please review, follow, favorite, ect.

I learn what I know
But I was born this way
More of a number
And less of a name
I talk a little too quiet
And not enough they say
I only tell my secrets
When it's time to pray
You wouldn't see the war just lookin' from the outside
I've got red dirt blood here runnin on the inside
Sink or swim, live or die
A saving grace and a blue sky
All alone, and unafraid
It's never just another day
And you don't back down or walk away
But I know, I do, I am
What it takes
What it takes
Wash away my footprints
With the undertow
While I'll walk the wire, of the great unknown
I got two parts too
My storied soul
One stands with my brothers, one waits for me back at home

The harsh Iraqi sand bites into the skin on my face as I walk around the Humvee, as I get in the back, I give a minute smile to Belle as Mulan and Merida get in the front, Mulan is going to be driving this run of supplies from Najaf to Bagdad, there's one other Humvee in our convoy, the main road is cut off, an IED had taken out so much of the road that we couldn't get through, so we were going down a back road.

The first half of the drive was almost silent, it's moments like this that I can't help but bring my hand to the crumpled letter and folded picture that's always in my pocket, the reason I'm over here instead of in collage getting my degree, she deserves better.

I'm thrown, literally, from my musings by a pop and smoke on mine and Mulan's side for a split second before the Humvee is flipped onto the right side. I don't hear anything but ringing, I taste and feel metallic, sticky blood flowing on my shoulder and face and in my mouth and feel a searing pain in my left arm, when I look down at my arm, I see red, and maybe a bit of white, before the pain is too much and I lose consciousness.

My eyes snap open. I'm panting, my heart is slamming into my chest. I attempt to push myself up, but my left side drops down, I look over and am shocked for the umpteenth time to see a stump instead of my arm.

'Dammit, Elsa, it's been three months, you got off lucky, you're home, Anna's right down the hall, you're fine, you should be over this. You have to get over this.' I remind myself before sitting up, gently taking my hand and tracing the jagged. scar on the stump that stopped halfway to where my elbow should be, bang I grab the pocket knife from the bedside table and drop to the ground, crawling to the corner.

Gunfire, one bullet after another "Arendelle, get down." Merida orders, I feel Belle pull on an arm that's not there, as I get ready to fight again, my entire body tense

"We need to get out of here!" Mulan yells over the gunshots

Footsteps. Then there's light and someone touching my arm "Elsa…Elsa…you're home…you're safe, you're with me… a car just backfired… you're home, Elsa…You're in your bedroom…"

"Anna?" I croak out a single tear escaping as I quickly drop the knife

"Yeah, it's me." She says, as I carefully bring my hand up, proving that she's here "Are you okay to get up?" She asks as my breathing evens out

I nod, pushing myself up, as I sit back on the bed I speak "I'm sorry, Anna."

"Don't apologize, I want to help, I wish I could do more." She says, brushing a few of my unruly bangs out of my face

"You're 17. You are still in high school. This burden shouldn't be on you. Plus I'm you're older sister, I should be protecting you, you shouldn't be reminding me that I'm not halfway around the world."

"You were 18 when you left, you're barely 20, this shouldn't be something you have to deal with either. You aren't a burden to me. Plus you've been protecting me since I was born, especially since mama and papa… now it's my turn, let me help." She argues back pushing me to lay down, sitting on the edge of the bed "I love you, Elsa." She says before standing "are you okay if I leave?" She asks carefully

I nod again, as she turns to leave, I see the tears on her face.

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Two years ago

"Here, let me help." I say to the girl struggling with her bag

"Be my guest." She says handing it to me, I pick it up easily "You're Elsa Arendelle, aren't you?" She asks after a moment

"Yep." I say popping the p

"Esmeralda." She says putting her hand out for me to shake "I've been meaning to introduce myself to you or your sister, to offer my condolences. I'm sorry about your parents."

I plaster on a smile "Thank you, we miss them."

"You're graduating next month, aren't you valedictorian?"

I nod slowly

"Where are you going? After here, I mean."

"I was going to go to Harvard. As you know, things have changed, I need to provide for Anna. I report to Ft. Benning two weeks after I graduate here."

"That's pretty brave."

"I don't have many other options." I respond "This your class?" I motion to the room we're at, she nods so I carefully hand her her bag before going to my first class "See you around."

The rest of the day passed relatively quiet, now it was 20 days until I leave "Anna!" I drop my bag on the hook by the door "Are you home?"

"In my room!" She yells from up the stairs, as I get further up the creaking stair case I hear her music blasting

"Kristoff give you a ride?" I say from the door way

"Yeah."

"Have you started packing?"

She shakes her head

"Anna…"

"I know, I need pack up what I'll need at least until school starts again, you're stuff and whatever we want to keep from mama and papa go in the storage units for, god willing, eighteen months."

"Anna."

"I'm right though, aren't I, you could not come back. We've already lost mama and papa, I can't lose you too."

"Anna," I repeat for the third time

"I know, you tell me not to worry and that I'll be fine at Aunt Helena and Uncle Aaron. I hate this! You shouldn't have to do this, you should be going to Harvard, not Bagdad. It's that fucking moron's fault, he was the one who was drunk driving, why does this family have to pay." Her tears start to cover her face "It's not fair!"

"Hey, Anna, I'm going to come back to you. I promise. I'm going to be in a unit with Belle, we will protect each other and comeback here. And you know we need this, otherwise…" pulling her into a gentle hug

"I'm going into the states care or Aunt Hel's care. I know, that doesn't mean I have to like it."

"I don't like it either."

"Then don't go."

"I have to."

"Then come back."

"I will." I wipe my eyes as I pull back from the hug and wipe hers as well "Just, trust me, I'll be back before you know it."