My life has been dipped in shit over and over again ever since Dad will tried to cheer me up,tried to convince me that the world isn't out to fucking get me but...all it did was remind me that she wasn't here for five fucking years. That she fucking abandoned me as soon as Dad died like I was fucking had to go though because her she couldn't exactly stay here with me while her parents moved to San Fransisco but...she could've at least called me,or text me,or put up a post on Facebook to , so I could've known that despite the distance she was still my best friend. That she still had my back no matter didn't even have the courage to send me a fucking letter! I bet when I,we find Rachel,she'll have a better excuse than"Oh,I meant to call Chloe but I was also so devastated by your dad's death that I didn't have the strength to call you, even though I knew I should've. By the time I was able to move on from you're dad's death,I thought it was too late to call you back and finally be the best friend I should've been all along".What kinda excuse is that Max?I can't blame you for being hit so hard by Dad's death but did you ever consider how it was for me? What's its like to not only lose you're Dad but you're best friend too and not just because she it was like to see you're best friend leave and be cool about it cause your so convinced she'll never really leave you, leave your sitting on you're bed,waiting for her to call you and the waiting soon turns into days,then weeks, then even a fucking postcard. It's hella there's Rachel,the girl who probably still is the love of you're life. The one who was always there for you no matter what,the one who made you feel high without the drugs. The one who you clingled onto because she made everything feel okay,even as everyone looked down on you as just some blue haired punk rock some bitc that was loud and was trash,basically as you as you hated and depised Mom for marrying David"step-douche " even though she knew that he is the security was the security guard at my school and he's a judgemental piece of shit that acts like he is still at as me and Mom slowly drifted away until we couldn't be in the same room sometimes. I missed the way things used to be till Dad died.I was so lost and alone until I met a fucing angel named took me up high in into her cloud and I floated up there with her.I believed that as long as I was up in her cloud,I would never be lost again...and then she fucking left me. Disappeared without a trace.I fell from her cloud and I began to get lost again. In trying to spend every waking moment trying to get high,trying to payoff Frank for the drugs,trying to live under the same roof as step-douche,slowly falling apart all over again. Then,just when I thought I would fall so hard I when I thought I was gonna fall so hard that I was gonna hit the ground and never be able to pick myself up again, Max,the girl who used to be my best friend, suddenly shows up to rescue me. I won't lie when I say that I fell in love with her,despite the fact that she abandoned me,being with her felt like the best feeling in the world. For the first time ever since Rachel left, my life finally feels right because she cares so fucking much and she's trying to help me find Rachel and she's so supportive and she makes me feel good about myself even though I am a shitty person and she's just so amazingly ready to do anything to keep me safe and we're so close to finding Rachel and then I...I find out all along that Rachel was banging Frank behind my back the whole time and this is just like fuck,I thought we had a special bond that nobody else had and oh god,I considered her the love of my life... And fuck!Fuck Rachel, Frank,David,Nathan fucking Prescott and ughhhghhg.*sniffle.*Fuck you Dad,why did you have to leave me?Why couldn't Mom just take the fucking bus home and I would've still had a father or a childhood. Fuck you life. You are cruel.