Chapter One

Naruto swayed back and forth uneasily as he made his way down the streets of Konoha. Sakura followed close behind him; her emerald eyes never leaving his backside for a moment. She was worried about him. She would of helped to steady him as he made his way back to his apartment in his drunken stupor but he refused her help. She hated when he became like this; so depressed and so angry that he was determined to drink until his problems were long forgotten, at least for the night. Sakura watched as he bumped into a tree and cursed as he scraped her arm on the rough bark.

"Naruto-kun, let me see it," Sakura scurried to his side and took his tan arm into her hands. She looked pale and ghostly illuminated in the moonlight compared to him. His arm was slightly cut up but it was nothing terrible.

"Let go of me, Sakura." Naruto tore his arm from her grasp and continued forward. She continued behind him until they reached his apartment. He pulled himself up the stairs, slowly, one by one he climbed. He leaned against the railing after each step and shook his head; clearing his vision. He finally made it up to his apartment, Sakura trailing behind. He dug through his pockets, throwing out all the contents that wasn't his house key. Sakura picked it all up: a condom, a stick of gum, some loose change. Once he found the key he hastily jammed it into the lock and fumbled with it until the door swung open. Naruto-kun, can't you see what you're doing to yourself? Sasuke is not worth this. Look, Naruto-kun, I'm here for you now and I always will be. I'll take care of you, forget him. None of the things that have happened is worth you destroying yourself. Sakura wanted to spill the words out so badly but she knew they'd mean nothing to him now and tomorrow he would probably barely remember her following him home.

He left his front door hanging open as he made his way towards his bedroom; Sakura shut the front door and placed his belongings onto the counter. "Sakura!" he called from the bedroom, "Sakura, I can't see."

Sakura walked in and helped him pull his shirt off his head. She then turned away as he thrashed around the room trying to pull off his pants. She turned around once she heard him stop bumping into things. He was passed out on his bed, his pants only half way off and his head hanging off the bottom of the bed. Sakura pulled off his pants and pulled his head onto the bed. She slid a pillow under his head of blonde hair and pulled the covers up to his chin before leaving him for the night.

Sakura walked slower now that Naruto was home in bed for the night. She looked at the sky and looked at the trees blowing slightly in the breeze. It was cold for late summer and she felt chilled even through her thick jacket. Her apartment was on the other side of town and she knew the walk would be long and cold. She stuffed her hands into the pockets of her jacket and bit her lower lip slightly. Naruto-kun. Sakura thought of him four years ago when they first became a team and how happy and full of life he was. The Naruto she knew now was just a shell of what he once was, she barely knew this Naruto. His drinking addiction and his depression; it wasn't how he should be. He didn't deserve this.

Sakura," Sakura heard Sai's voice and she jumped slightly but turned and smiled once she regained her composure. Sai had gotten used to saying Sakura's name without a suffix and Sakura was glad Sai finally felt comfortable around her.

"Hey, Sai, why are you still awake?" Sakura pushed a smile onto her lips and momentarily pretended nothing was wrong. She felt Sai study her closely and her heart beat fast as she wondered if Sai knew something was wrong. If anyone heard of Naruto's problems he'd be ridiculed for it and the Hokage would most defiantly be upset with him and possibly expel him from being a ninja. Tsunade, unlike Hero, would understand but Tsunade-Sama is no longer around.

"I was drawing and lost track of time," Sai smiled at her. It was a smile that resembled his fake ones that he'd shown for so long but over time she saw it slowly gain life and truth to it, "why are you out so late, Sakura-chan?"

"I was out with Naruto and he lived closer to the restaurant so I walked home with him. I'm on my way back home now." Sakura kept up her smile despite the lump burning in her throat. She suddenly felt so tired and like everything around her was falling apart. Her life four years ago, back with the old Naruto, had been so perfect. Sasuke was on her team, her chance to make him fall in love with her. Naruto, at the time was a burden, but she came to care for him as well. She was surrounded by a family with team seven. Naruto, her brother. Kakashi, her father. Sasuke, the man of her dreams. When Tsunade came she became the motherly figure. Ino eventually became the sisterly figure in her life again. Sai was also like a brother after she got used to him. Those people made her feel at home. Now, Tsunade had passed away. Kakashi was away on a long term undercover mission. Sasuke...god knows what he's been up to lately. Naruto has fallen apart. He couldn't handle the changes happening around them like she could.

"I see," Sai nodded and they momentarily locked eyes. Sakura learned that Sai knew you were lying when you looked away. She didn't flinch at his glance. He seemed content with her answer, "I'll see you tomorrow at practice then."

"Alright," Sakura watched him run off toward his house which was only a few blocks from Naruto's. Sakura continued her long walk home in silence. She refused to think about anything besides how lovely the moon looked tonight and how pretty the city looks lit up.

Finally she reached her apartment complex and climbed the flight of stairs up to her home. She shared the apartment with Ino and her long time boyfriend, Kankuro. Ino had been introduced to Kankuro when Shikamaru introduced her to Temari, his girlfriend and her family. Apparently Ino and Kankuro hit it off right away; love at first sight. Sakura, though she hated to admit it, was jealous of what Ino and Kankuro shared. The only person she was ever close to having something like that with was Sasuke, and everyone knew that what she shared with Sasuke was basically nothing. Even Naruto had moved on once he realized she'd never loved him the way she loved Sasuke. Now, she wished she could go back in time and allow him to be her guy; even if she didn't love him. She wanted him to be happy.

"Your home late tonight," Ino smiled when Sakura walked through the front door. Sakura smiled at her. Ino was dressed in her silky nightgown and had one of Kankuro's sweatshirts pulled over her shoulders. It was chilly tonight. Kankuro was lounging next to her, his arm around her shoulders.

"I was with Naruto," Sakura told her. Ino nodded slowly, Sakura knew that Ino wasn't stupid. Ino was catching on to the fact that Naruto wasn't who he used to be. Kankuro knew it as well but neither said anything about it.

"Are you going to bed, Sakura-chan?" Kankuro called after her. Kankuro had become the older brother in her life and she liked that. He worried about her as if she really was his younger sister and, though it sometimes made Ino jealous, Sakura liked it.

"Yeah," Sakura said as she walked into her room and locked the door. Only when she was undressed and she turned her stereo on did she allow herself to cry. Everything she'd been feeling all evening: the sorrow, the loss, the regret. Everything poured out of her as she pulled out her kunai. The blood came quickly at first, exploding from the newly formed cut and pooling on the wood floor beneath, then slowed afterwards. Her tears dripped into the cuts; mixing with the blood.