Ashes
He picked her up out of the ashes. He let her be reborn again. And he's all she's ever wanted and more.
And I want to know…what about me?
-x-
Of course, I'm the one who burned her in the first place. Without me, she wouldn't be like a phoenix, she wouldn't need to be reborn, and she wouldn't need to try again. If only…if only I had told her.
If only I wasn't too old for her. If only she wasn't so young.
But I can't waste my life thinking of If Onlys.
I have to move on to And Thens.
-x-
She's practically like my cousin, Rose is. Though we're not related, I swear, I've known her since she was born. I was one of the first people to see her after she was born.
She was born on January 1st, you know. The start of a new year. She was like a fresh beginning for us all. Looking at her as she cooed (and the adults as well) made me resolve never to let her (or any of them really) to get hurt.
Little did I know that I would be the one that was doing the hurting.
-x-
It all started the summer between her sixth and seventh year. I was already graduated for Hogwarts for some years (being that I was already graduated when she had entered her first year). We had always shared a special bond, Rose and I, and we were just talking one day, when I suddenly felt the same way I had felt about Victoire years ago (actually, Rose's first day of Hogwarts).
I was just looking at her, and she was smiling, and laughing, and suddenly I found myself laughing too.
"What are you laughing at?" she asked, the corners of her mouth curled up.
"I don't know," I muttered under my breath.
"You don't know?" she asked incredulously, "Why, how can you laugh without a reason?"
"I don't know," I said again.
"Theodore Remus Lupin," she said, shaking her head, "You are really confused today, aren't you?" I shrugged.
"I know something that might make me feel less confused," I said.
"What is it?" she asked.
"I'll need your help," I smirked.
"Alright then," she said, "What is it?" And that's when I leaned over and kissed her on the mouth. To my complete and utter shock, she didn't push me away. Instead, she leaned in closer.
"Teddy," she said, staring at me with her big, beautiful, blue eyes, "Why didn't you do this a lot sooner?"
"Better late than never," I smirked, pulling her in closer.
-x-
She said she liked me for a long time before I kissed her.
I asked why she had never said anything before.
"Because you're practically my cousin Teddy," she said, "And you're a lot older than me. I could never, ever tell anyone that I like my older cousin. They'd be horrified."
"Especially your Dad," I nodded.
"And my Mum," she closed her eyes, "Teddy, what are they going to do when they find out?"
And it was the when, not the if, that scared me the most.
-x-
"I never thought about the fact that you're married before," Rose muttered, "Yes, I knew that you were married, but it never really occurred to me that you were married and we are…what is it we're doing, exactly?"
"I call it friends-with-benefits," I said smugly.
"Friends-with-benefits?" she echoed, "Teddy, that is the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say, and trust me, I've heard you say quite a lot of stupid things in the whole time that I've known, which is basically my whole life."
"That takes the cake, eh?" I titled my head, "What would you prefer to be called then?"
"Your girlfriend," she whispered, so softly that it almost flew away with the wind.
"Rose," I said, "I'm married."
"Teddy," she said with a smirk, "You're still seeing me anyway."
"Details," I muttered, and she laughed.
"Oh yes, details," she said sarcastically, "Who cares about those?"
"No one," I muttered.
"Details are important," she protested.
"To you," I smirked.
"To everyone," she said, "What would've happened if Dumbledore hadn't had details on how to kill Voldemort? Details wouldn't have been so stupid then, huh?"
"If Dumbledore didn't have details on how to kill Voldemort, he would've lived. C'mon you're a smart girl, Rosie. You could've figured that out," I said with a smirk. Steam was practically spewing out her ears.
"You are an idiot," she said.
"You are hot when you're angry," I said back, smirking.
"You are a prat," she declared.
"I'll take that," I said. She rolled her eyes.
"There are no words adequate enough to describe you, Teddy Lupin," she said, and I nodded.
"I never knew I was indescribable," I nodded slowly, "It's nice you think of me that way."
"You're such a prat!" she yelled.
"Ah," I said, "Back to square one, I see."
She practically exploded.
-x-
"Teddy," she came in the middle of the night. She looked like a ghost. She was whispering, so she was talking like one too.
"What is it, Rose?" I asked.
"I need to talk to you," she said firmly.
"Now?" I asked, "It's the middle of the bloody night!"
"Yes," she said, "I know. But I've been up all night thinking about this, and I really need to talk to you about it now."
"Can't it wait until morning?" I begged.
"No," she said firmly, "It can't."
"Fine," I muttered, "Get on with it, then."
"I think we should break up," she said calmly. I was instantly awake.
"What?" I asked.
"I…I can't do this," she started crying, "I can't do this anymore. I love you Teddy, I really do, but I can't be with you when you're married. You're married, Teddy. To my cousin, no less. And I know, I know, that we're a pretty dysfunctional family, but secretly dating your own cousin's husband behind her back? Do you realise how horrible that is-how horrible that just sounds, Teddy? And I love Victoire, honestly, I do, and so that's why I can't do this to her."
"Rose," I said quietly, 'Are you sure about this?"
"No," she said sobbing, "I honestly and truly don't want to break up. But I won't-I can't go out with you while you're married to my cousin. What kind of person will I be if I keep doing this?"
"Rose, who cares?" I said, "Who cares what they, our family, thinks? It's what we think that matters, right? I love you and you love me and-"
"No," Rose said, "No. I don't care what they think, but I care what I think, and I think that this is a horrible idea. It's not going to end well. Do you hear me Teddy? It's not going to end well, it's going to hurt so many people."
"But Rose-" I protested.
"No," she said, "It's over. I should go, Teddy. Where is Victoire? Shouldn't she be home by now?"
"She's out late on an Auror mission," I said, "But Rose, it's really late. Maybe you should sleep on it, and give me your final answer in the morning. I just don't want you doing something you'll regret."
"I already have," she said firmly, "But I'll do it anyway, if that's what you want."
Then she left, as swiftly as she came, and I was left wishing that she was a ghost, and that this was a dream that I could wake up too.
-x-
The next morning she told me her answer. It was the same as before. No. It's over.
I didn't have words. Usually words didn't fail me, but this time they did.
-x-
We spent the next few months avoiding each other's presence, skipping around each other. Which, admittedly, wasn't the most mature way to act, but what else were we supposed to do?
We couldn't rewrite the past. We just had to go and hope for a better future.
-x-
I heard about a few days after it happened. I had gone to visit Nana (which is what Molly makes me call her).
"Oh Teddy," she said, "Did you hear the news?"
"What news?" I asked, thinking it was something like Fred and James had blown up another bathroom (don't ask) or Molly had gotten all O's, or anything other than what she actually said.
"Rosie has a boyfriend!" she squealed, "Can you imagine?"
"What?" I jumped up in surprise, "She was a what?"
"A boyfriend," Nana said, super happy, "Isn't that the most wonderful thing you've ever heard?"
"Who is it?" I asked, clenching my fist.
"Lily didn't say," Nana replied.
"Lily?" I asked, "Lily told you about this and you believe it's true?"
-x-
"It's true," Rose told me. It was a weekend, sometime in late January. She had come to visit us.
"Who is it?" I practically snarled. She looked at me.
"Scorpius Malfoy," she said quietly. Scorpius Malfoy? I thought that would never last.
"Yes," she said happily.
"How?" I asked.
"It was at a New Year's Eve Party," she said, "We were both drunk, and it was midnight, and somehow we ended up kissing. And it all escalated up from there."
"That's it?" I asked.
"That's it?" she asked, "That was the best birthday present I ever got. And I love Scorpius, I really do. Much more than I ever liked you, anyway." And she stormed out of the room, crying.
"Rose!" I called after her.
I wish I said something different.
-x-
"Rose," It was weeks, maybe months later. I didn't keep track of time. Everything seemed to revolve around one thing these days. Her.
"What?" she spat.
"I'm sorry," I said.
"For what?" she asked.
"For…for…implying that your relationship with Scorpius wasn't…was…"
"You bloody awful at apologising, Teddy Lupin," she laughed, and the corners of her mouth curled up.
"Sorry," I grinned.
"Now there's an apology!" she laughed, "That one's for the books."
"I wonder if I'll be in a textbook one day," I said.
"What, like Uncle Harry?" she said, "Sorry Teddy, but the world doesn't exactly need a savior right now. You're a tad late."
"Maybe not for saving the world," I said, "But making a difference somehow."
"What could you possibly do?" she joked.
"I don't know," I mused.
"Whatever," she laughed.
"Are we good now?" I asked.
"We're great," she laughed, and I leaned forward and kissed her on the lips. She glared at me.
"What?" I said, "It was a friendly kiss."
"Oh yes, you're very friendly, Teddy Lupin."
"Exceedingly so."
-x-
"I'm going to help you," she announced, sitting down next to me, a few days later.
"Help me do what?" I asked. She was so pretty, I thought. But I can't do this anymore. I can't, think about her in this way. She's practically my cousin, and she has a boyfriend now.
"Help you figure out how you're going to make a difference in this world," she smiled.
"Really?" I asked, eyebrows raised.
"Truly," she nodded.
"No ulterior motives for doing this?" I asked. She held up her hands.
"None," she said, "But I can see that this is important to you, Teddy, so I'm going to help you accomplish this."
"Alright then," I said, "When do we start?"
"I was thinking…now?" she titled her head.
"Fine by me," I said.
"Great," she smiled that perfect smile, and her lips curled up, and I forced myself not to think about her in that way, but Merlin, that was hard. And I thought that this was going to be a long afternoon.
-x-
That afternoon actually passed by quiet short, actually. And all the other afternoons like it. We flirted and bantered a lot, but I couldn't tell if it was serious, or if we were just kidding.
I started to wonder if I cared, anyhow. Once, I kissed her on the cheek, and she swatted me away. But it was afterwards, that I realised I didn't feel a thing.
And it was then, that I started to realise that I might be falling out of love with Rose Weasley.
-x-
She ran into the library one afternoon, practically bursting.
"I did it!" she shouted, " I did it!"
"You did what?" I asked curiously.
"I figured it out!" she said.
"What did you figure out?"
"What you're going to do to make a difference!"
"Oh yeah?" I asked.
"Yeah," she smiled.
"And what exactly am I doing?"
"You're going to find a cure for lycanthropy," she said proudly.
"That's bloody brilliant!" I said, picked her up and spun her around, "Rose Weasley, you're a genius!"
And I kissed her on the lips. She kissed back a little, both of us so blissfully happy that we forgot for a moment.
And I realised I didn't feel a thing.
-x-
"I just can't believe it," I shook my head.
"Believe it," she said, "Because it's happening."
"I just can't believe that you're graduating," I said to Rose, "I can still see you, as an annoying little eleven year old."
"I was not an annoying little eleven year old," she said.
"Yes you were," I teased. I changed my voice to sound high-pitched, "'Mum, do you think people will like me? Mum, do you think I'll make friends? Mum, do you think I'll get O's in all of my classes? Mum, is dad really going to disinherit me if I get into Slytherin?'"
"I did not say that!" she protested, and stuck her tongue out at me.
"Still an eleven year old, I see," I continued, "Well, Rosie, I guess you're just going to be a very late bloomer."
"Oh, shove off," she said.
"Rose," someone said from behind. She turned and saw Scorpius standing, "Are you going coming or not?"
"Coming to what?" she asked.
"The graduation party, smart one," he teased.
"Oh yeah!" she said, "Let's go! Bye Teddy!"
"Ted," Scorpius nodded at me.
"Scorpius," I imitated.
"Who's the eleven year old now?" she scoffed and started to walk away, dragging Scorpius along with her.
"It's still you," I yelled after her. I turned to go back to Victoire.
We both walked away. And neither one of us looked back.
-x-
"I want to help," Rose said. It was a few weeks after she had graduated.
"What?" I asked, befuddled.
"I want to help you figure out the cure," she said, "I've always loved Potions, and I can tell that this really matters to you, because of your father and all, and I just wanted to say that I wanted to help. So can I?"
"Of course," I said, "Thank you."
"No problem," she said, "What is family for, after all?"
"Uh, teasing, pranking, embarrassing…"
"Teddy Lupin, you are still a prat, do you know that?"
"I know," I said, "But I must be a loveable prat, since you've stuck with me for so long."
"Whatever," Rose said and started to walk away.
"Be in my lab, tomorrow at eight!" I yelled at her retreating form.
"Whatever!" she yelled back at me. I smiled.
-x-
She's like a phoenix. She was reborn. She rose from the ashes and became a new person.
He picked her up from the ashes. He let her be reborn again. He's all she's ever wanted and more.
And what about me?
I'll be fine.
I've risen from the ashes too.
A/N-Well, there's Rose/Teddy. Never thought I'd write that. And I know a lot of you may think that Teddy is immature and selfish. He was sort of supposed to be, and this story was as much about him growing up as it is for him loving Rose. I hope that was clear. This is for (and hold on, it's a lot)
-Weasley Wizarding Wheezes Deflagration Deluxe (write over 2000 words),
-The first round of the 52 Weeks in a Year with the prompts-New Year, Resolve, Drunk and Textbook
-The Party Challenge-7 minutes in Heaven (option 2) (write over 2000 words),
-The "Stretch Your Limits Competition" with write in the POV of a NextGen Character
-Creatures of Hogwarts Challenge-Erumpent (write about something exploding),
-The Hogwarts Games-Swimming-Butterfly 2000+ with Rose/Teddy
-What We Pretend to Be Challenge with Rose/Scorpius-must be happy
-L'esprit de l'escalier Challenge
-Triad Diversity Boot Camp with the prompt "phoenix",
-Pairing Diversity Boot Camp, with the prompt "There is nothing like a good dose of another (wo)man to make a (wo)man appreciate his/her wife/husband.