I don't feel so hot
I'm the most special, most extraordinary, most charming, most amazing, splendiferous person in the whole entire universe. Everyone loves me. And everyone simply adores my chocolates.
But why don't I feel so hot?
Poo. Life used to be soo full of joy. Now I feel like it's just ho hum. Where has my zing gone? Where has my flair disappeared? I keep trying new ideas, but they turn rotten. I keep second guessing myself and producing zilch. Gee, I haven't laughed at random things in…ages.
I think I need a doctor. No! A pyschoiatrist.
Think Willy, think. What could be the cause of all this?
Is it the Oompa Loompas? Nope, they're fine. I'm fine. Wait! No, I'm not. Rats.
Hmm? Maybe it's that no good Slugworth. Oh he's a meanie. Trying to steal all my life's work and…wait! That was ten years ago. Shoot. I really need to get out more.
Then it must be me.
Shocking I know, but something must be wrong with me.
But how can there be! I'm the amazing chocolatier! Hurray!
My teeth are perfect. I keep them nice and shiny. My hair is too, ha ha. Gotta keep it nice and moist. If it's not my God given, darn good looks, then what is it?
Gasp! Eureka! I've just thought of it.
Earwax!
I haven't had my ears cleaned for ages and-eww, wait no no, I just got my ears waxed yesterday.
Sigh. I'm never going to get to the bottom of this. I should just call it quits. Kick the bucket. Ride off into the-
Bucket?
Bucket comma Charlie. Oh my stars! That's it then.
The boy.
I don't feel soo hot because of the boy.
Yeah! I must give myself a pat on the back. Pat.
But what now? Charlie must think I'm a no good cad for what I said to him. He and his p-p-pa-par—ugh! Those people, he and those people would never let me near their run-down shack again. There must be a way. Think, think.
The Great Glass Elevator!
I'm a genius. Thank you thank you. Why didn't I think of this sooner, ha ha!
To the elevator! Forward.
Up, up, and out…