Broken
By Montez
Disclaimer: Sadly I only own the DVD's and I'm not sharing.
A/N: I know it's been done to death (no pun intended) but I couldn't help to write something. I have a possible longer story in the works, but I'm currently blocked on that one. This one came to me and morphed a little. It's slightly out of character, but to me it's a possibility it could happen, so I went with it. Of course that being said, this is my version of what could happen just after the end of the season finale. Right now it's a one-shot with no plans to continue-I honestly don't know if I could go past this point (that's what is holding me up on my other story). Anyway I hope you give it a chance and enjoy. Thank you-Montez
His hands were shaking. He could only ever recall a few times in his life where he could remember his hands shaking. The first being at his very first book launch party when someone asked him for his autograph for the first time, he could still remember how shaky his writing looked as he scribbled 'Richard Castle' on the title page of his first ever crime novel. The second time he could remember was when a nurse brought him a pink bundle and placed it in his arms. He had thought he knew what love was, after all he'd loved his mother, he'd loved Meredith, but the moment he looked into the big, bright eyes of his newborn daughter he truly discovered what love was.
It would be many more years before he could recall his hands shaking again. It was the first time he'd fired a gun to save Detective Kate Beckett's life. Rick had rounded the corner in the warehouse to find the detective sprawled out on the floor, her stalker standing over her aiming a gun at her head. He remembered yelling, then raising the gun and shooting. By some divine luck he shot the gun right out of the man's hand allowing Kate the time to get up and take him into custody. In the moments after he looked down at his hands and they were violently shaking as Beckett stepped up to him, placing her steady hand over his, taking the gun from his grasp. The last time he could remember was when he'd opened the back of that van and found himself face to face with a dirty bomb with less than two minutes left on the counter. In those two minutes so much passed between him and Kate without a word being spoken. This was the third time in two days they were staring death in the face and they both believed it was their last, at least until Rick took that last second 'Hail Mary' and reached his shaking hand out jerking all the wires from the device, thus saving them and the city.
But now, as he stared at his shaking hands, they were covered in red. A shade of red that no person could accurately describe, because God knows he's tried over the years in his novel, but staring at it now, he knew there would never be a way of putting into words how this shade of red looked covering his hands. His eyes traveled to what else the red covered, the bright, vivid green of the grass, the dark, midnight-blue of her uniform, the stark, snow-white of her gloves. Yes, everything else could be described but that red.
His mind didn't process what was happening as he watched paramedic's frantically work to save the dying woman's life, as it continued to absently search for the correct adjective to describe the crimson color. He vaguely heard someone shout, 'He's going with her.' feeling someone lead him toward the ambulance that she was being loaded into, he automatically climb into the back of the rig with her. It was then he again noticed the shaking as he reached his stained hand out to take her pale, glove-colored one.
He didn't hear anything the EMT's were saying, truth be told he couldn't hear anything at all, his only focus was on the stark-white face that was partially hidden by a translucent plastic mask, barely a hint of mist coating the inside giving any indication that the beautiful face it was covering belonged to someone still alive. Rick silently prayed that those gorgeous green-eyes would open, that the woman they belonged to would look at him then roll those same eyes as she'd done many, many times over the years when she would catch him staring at her. But they remained closed, her dark hair punctuating the porcelain like paleness of her face.
Before he knew what was happening the doors to the ambulance were pulled open and she was pulled from his grasp, he quickly jumped from the back, needing to stay close, needing to clasp her small hand in his to stop them from shaking. But it was a firm, steady hand that stopped him from following her and guided him to a nearby chair. A muffled 'someone will be out as soon as they can' was heard as that hand too disappeared and he was left again staring at his own shaking, red covered hands.
He had no idea how long he had sat there before a new set of hands encircled him, he looked up into the face of the one person that had shown him what love really was as he met the terrified gaze of his daughter. Rick stood and she encircled his waist as she buried her head against his chest, he could feel her whole body shaking against his as he wrapped his arms around her. Another gentle hand was felt on his shoulder as he raised shell-shocked eyes and saw his mother before him. She placed her other hand to his cheek and he felt himself leaning into it, needing the comfort of her steady, caring hand.
Words finally broke through the numbness of his mind as he opened his eyes to see Javier and Lanie rushing down the hall toward them, their hands clasped in mutual support of one another, Ryan and Jenni following in almost exactly the same fashion, "Do we know anything yet?" Esposito asked as he stopped next to Rick, Alexis still held tight in his arms. All he could do in response was shake his head, for a man who made a living with words; none could make their way past the emotions that were clogging his throat.
Rick watched his mother step away as another person took up the spot in front of him, raising his eyes from the top of his daughter's head, he felt his body stiffen, Alexis reacted by releasing her hold on her father and stepping into the arms of her grandmother. The man before Rick looked broken beyond words, Rick could understand the fear the man carried for his daughter's safety, it was a fear Rick also carried, the only difference now was that Rick's daughter was safely beside him while Jim Beckett's daughter was somewhere behind the allusive silver doors fighting for her life. A life that just days ago Jim had begged Rick to help save.
Rick took in the unimaginable pain-filled expression of the man before him before he felt the man's hands grab his arms and pull him into a hard embrace. Rick's mind could fathom why the man was hugging him, comforting him, when he had let Jim down; he had not been fast enough to save the man's daughter. It was reflex that caused Rick to hug Jim back, his mind noting how the older man's body shook slightly before the man pulled back. "Thank you Rick." Jim whispered. Noting the confused expression on Rick's face Kate's father continued, "You were there for her, you were with her so she wasn't alone, you stayed beside her."
Rick stepped back, shaking his head as he stared at Jim Beckett. How was this man thanking him, he hadn't been fast enough to save the woman they both loved and her father was thanking him, "No…" Rick mumbled as he looked at Jim, "I didn't…I couldn't save her." He whispered as he looked at the people before him; his mother and Alexis, Esposito and Lanie, Ryan and Jenni then his eye's came back to Jim Beckett. Rick felt his world tilt; all these people were in pain, in fear of losing someone important to them, that they loved because he hadn't been quick enough. Rick stepped back again, needing to move, to put some space between himself and everyone else, "No…" he mumbled again as he abruptly turned and quickly made his way down the hallway.
"Dad?" Alexis called out; attempting to follow him, but Martha stopped her.
"He needs some time dear, he'll be back." Martha pulled the teen back to her as she reached out a comforting hand, placing it on Jim Beckett's shoulder. They all watched as Rick disappeared around the corner at the end of the hall.
He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, his stomach churning, his mind clouding as he moved. He couldn't stand there and accept comfort from Kate's father, from his family, his friends, when he had failed them all. What kind of partner was he; he had told Kate he was her partner, that he'd have her back. And even after that terrible fight in her apartment, he knew he would never walk away from her. Yes he had left her apartment, but he would never leave her, no matter how hard she pushed, he loved her. God, he loved her more than anything other than his own daughter. Rick had never loved a woman like he did Kate and it scared him. He had never told her for fear of scaring her off by the simple fact his was Richard Castle, the rich playboy with two ex-wives and countless woman in his wake. That is of course if you believed the hype. Yes Rick had two failed marriages, yes he was rich, but though it may have been slightly true in his past, Rick was no longer the playboy the papers still wanted to make him out to be. He hadn't been for a very long time and it was because of her, because of Kate.
As he thought of her he could feel the adrenaline coursing through his veins, causing his whole body to shake with the excess energy. He stopped and started to pace in place, his mind could not process what he was suppose to do next, he couldn't sit, he couldn't stand, his body cried out to keep moving or he was sure he would explode from the energy it was trying to release. He ran his hands over his face, through his hair, he turned as looked the way he'd come, no he couldn't go back to them, not yet. He turned and looked further down the hall and saw more people, he couldn't deal with people at the moment. Rick turned completely around and his eye's landed on a small room. Pushing the doors open he scanned it and was relieved to see it empty. He was in the room that housed the vending machines and a couple small tables. When the door clicked behind him he leaned against it and allowed his body to slide to the floor, he laid his arms across his knees, lowering his head to lay on them. He needed some time, some quiet time as he took a deep breath. It was then, in the quiet of the small room his mind seemed to come into sharp focus, Kate Beckett had been shot.
"Oh God, Kate…" He whispered as a sob finally made its way past the lump in his throat. His vision blurred as tears filled his eye's, he raised his head and moved his hand to wipe his face, but froze. It was then he again saw the now dried red color on his hands, it was then he saw them start to shake again, it was then his mind finally processed that it was Kate's blood that was now dried on his hands.
Anger welled up inside Rick like he had never known. He pushed himself up and started pacing again. He was angry at the person, all those years ago that had Kate's mother killed, he was angry as Coonan for taunting them with the knowledge of who was behind it only for Kate to have had to kill him before the information was revealed. He was angry at Ragland for waiting all those years before contacting Kate to try and atone for his sins and involvement in Johanna's murder. He was angry at Lockwood for trying to kill Kate because she was getting too close. He was angry at Roy for being the third cop in this whole mess that originally set the chain of events in motion that had brought them all to this point. But mostly he was angry with himself, for poking around where he shouldn't have, for digging at old wounds, exposing them again, thus by setting off the second chain of events that had ultimately brought them here.
Rick's mind went white with rage as he grabbed the closest thing to him and threw it across the room, "Uuuuurrrrggggghhhhh…." a primal cry erupted from deep within his soul as the chair connected with the front of the vending machine, sparks flying as the glass shattered. Rick's rational thought had shut down and the anger had taken over as he grabbed another chair and threw it, it landing near the first as his rampage continued.
The other's had watched Rick leave, each worried about both him and Kate, they each knew if Kate didn't make it that there was a very real possibility that they could loss Rick as well. Jim had taken a seat in the chair Rick had vacated; Martha took the one next to him, Alexis next to her. Lanie and Jenni were sitting together across from them as Ryan and Esposito paced back and forth in the small enclave.
Rick had been gone about fifteen minutes when everyone reacted to a loud noise filtering down the hallway, followed instantly by the crashing of glass. Ryan and Esposito reacted first, taking off down the hallway toward the sound. As they rounded the corner they saw security coming toward them from the other direction. The guard stopped when Ryan put his hand up, recognizing the NYPD uniforms the two officers still had one. Another crash had both men moving cautiously toward the room; glancing in the window they were shocked to see Richard Castle, literally tearing the room apart. They had never known Rick to react like this, they honestly never fathomed the man had that much rage in him, but they also knew how he felt about Kate and knew he was blaming himself for what had happened to her.
"We got to get him under control before we have to arrest him." Esposito said as another crash came from the room. A noise just up the hall brought their attention back to the direction they'd come, looking up they saw Martha and Alexis watching them, the other's just behind. "Lanie, keep them back." Javier called out. They all jumped slightly as another crash came from the room.
Alexis made a step forward, "Is it dad?" her worried, scared voice not lost on the two men. They were both positive the teen had never seen her father like this and hoped they could get him under control enough to where she wouldn't.
"Alexis, stay back." Ryan said as Martha finally picked up on what was happening.
"They'll take care of your father." Martha took a hold of Alexis's arm as the teen tried to move again.
"DAD!" She shouted out, fear gripping her as the crashing sounds continued in the room.
Lanie finally came forward and took the teen's other arm. "They've got him, baby, let them work first."
Seeing that the others weren't coming any closer the two detectives looked at each other. Esposito looked back in the window as Rick continued to rage, his back to the door. "I'll grab him first, but I think it's gonna take both of us to get him down, let's just hope the two of us can do it." They both knew Rick had a couple inches on them, as well as a few pounds, normally one of them could have probably taken a person the writers size, but with the anger that was emanating from the man in the room, they could only pray it would only take both of them. If more officers had to become involved it could lead to their friend spending the night in lock-up instead of in the waiting room waiting for news about Kate.
"Now?" Ryan asked as he took position at the door, both men looked in again as the final chair went flying across the room.
Esposito met his partner's look and nodded, "NOW!"
Ryan pulled the door open, Esposito rushing forward before the author could get his hands on anything else in the room. The detective tackled Rick from behind, sending them both into the wall. Esposito wasn't prepared for the violent reaction as Rick came around swinging, in his raged haze he didn't even realize who had a hold of him. Javier jerked back, the impact of Rick's arm to his face stunned him as he saw Ryan reach them, grabbing the writer's other arm before he could take another swing. "CASTLE! MAN IT'S US!" Ryan shouted as the man in their grip continued to fight.
Rick managed to get a little leverage from the wall and lunged backwards, driving himself and the two detectives into the counter that lined one wall, but neither released their hold as Esposito finally gained some ground, reaching up and getting his arm around Rick's neck from behind, his voice growling into the author's ear, "DAMN IT CASTLE, STOP!" Ryan continued to try and keep Rick's arms from coming up and hitting him or Esposito again. When the writer didn't react Javier nodded at Ryan as they both pushed forward to throw Rick of balance, when the taller man stumbled the two officers were able to pull him to the ground.
Esposito was on the floor behind him, still holding him in a choke hold as Ryan got in front keeping his arms pinned down. From his vantage point Kevin was able to get his first good look at his friend and he was shocked at what he saw. For the first time he could ever remember Rick's face was contorted in rage, his eye's void of any emotion even as tears spilled down his cheeks. Their friend continued to struggle so Ryan got within inches of his face, "RICK!" Ryan believed it was the first time he had ever used Castle's first name and by the immediate reaction to the unfamiliar word coming from the familiar voice, it finally broke through the angered haze that had engulfed Rick's mind.
Esposito wasn't expecting the instant response to his partner shouting Rick's name in his face, but in that moment the writer's body stilled in his grip. Kevin watched as the rage disappeared, followed by confusion. "Let's get him up some." Ryan helped Javier to set up, pulling the writer up with them, as they leaned back against the counter. Esposito was reluctant to release his friend until they knew for sure he had calmed down. Kevin turned his attention to the now still, quiet man before him, "Castle, can you hear me?"
"Ryan?" Rick whispered as confusion stayed in place a moment, then Kevin watched the man before him literally crumble, "Oh God, Kate…" Rick mumbled as sobs replaced the rage that had been there only moments before.
Both detectives looked at one another as they watched and felt Castle completely lose it in their arms. Rick's body shook as emotions consumed him, the man's strength giving out as he sagged in Javier's grip, the officer's hold being the only thing keeping Rick from laying on the floor of the shattered vending machine room. "Get Lanie in here." Javier said quietly, worried that Rick was possibly going into shock.
Ryan quickly made his way toward the door, "Lanie, we need you in here a minute." he spoke quietly as he made his way down the hall toward everyone else.
"Where's my dad? What's wrong?" Alexis pleaded.
Kevin looked at Lanie, then at Rick's daughter, "Just give us a couple minutes, I know this is tough, but we just need to make sure he's okay. I don't think he'd want you to see him like this."
Ryan looked up to meet Martha's worried gaze, she seemed to understand what was going on with her son without the detective going into detail. Nodding the younger man turned to head back down the hallway Lanie just making her way through the doorway. He stopped a second next to Jenni, leaning in close to not to further worry Alexis, "Jenni, could you go and see if you could get a doctor to come down here?" Her concerned gaze met his; she'd met Rick a few times and liked him, so the worry in her fiancés face told her just how bad things had gotten. Giving his hand a quick squeeze she headed down the hallway as Ryan made his way back to the room.
Lanie'd worked with the boys long enough to recognize most of their expressions and the one Kevin wore as he approached them scared her nearly as much as realizing her best friend had been shot. They heard the sounds of the rampage from their place in the hallway, she'd helped hold Castle's daughter as she struggled to get free and get to her father. They'd heard both Kevin's and Javier's raised voices trying to get through to the writer, but it was the quiet that followed that worried them most, Ryan's appearance only accentuated the concern they all had for Rick.
However the scene that greeted her as she stepped through the doorway shocked even her. She'd been to many crime scenes, saw destruction on an unimaginable scale, but when she stepped into that room she was absolutely shocked that the man that was responsible was their mild-mannered writer-boy. Stepping further in, she heard the noise before she ever saw them and her heart started to break at the desperate sound that was coming from the man in Esposito's arms. Never had Lanie ever imaged she would see the larger than life Richard Castle so broken, she could tell by the way Javier held him, that the detective was the only thing keeping Rick from being sprawled in the floor.
Tears sprang to Lanie's eyes as she stepped closer, kneeling down in front of the men. Javier's voice brought her attention to him, "I think he's starting to hyperventilate, if we can't calm him down he's gonna pass out." Esposito spoke softly as Lanie finally noticed Rick's hitched breathing.
Pushing her emotions to the side Lanie switched into doctor mode as she reached out toward Rick's wrist to check how fast his pulse was, she was shocked it was as rapid as it was. She and Esposito looked toward the door as it opened and Ryan entered, "I've got Jenni getting a doctor." He came and knelt next to them glancing at Lanie, "No offense."
Lanie gave him a weak smile then focused back on Rick; she reached up and took his face in her hands, "Castle, look at me." She spoke softly, but sternly. The devastation she saw in his eye's nearly took her own breath, God why had it taken them so long to realize how they felt about each other, not that it would have or could have changed what was happening, but at least then all this emotion would have been out in the open instead of the man before her collapsing under the weight of it. "Castle…" she spoke again, "Rick, I need to you to calm down, you need to slow you're breathing down."
Rick's pleading blue-eye's met Lanie's dark ones as his breathing continued to come out in gasps. For a moment the M.E. thought she saw recognition in his broken gaze, but in that moment his breathing became hick-upped and she could only watch as eyes rolled back and Rick went limp in Esposito's arms. "Shit…" Javier mumbled as he and Ryan worked to get their friend laid on his back, Lanie reaching forward to check his pulse, tilting his head back to help with breathing. Thankfully the pulse was still rapid but strong and his breathing almost immediately started to even out since he was no longer fighting it.
"What the…?" All three of them looked up at the sound of the new voice as a doctor and nurse entered the room.
"We'll take care of it, but we need you over here." Ryan spoke as he stood, the doctor relaxing some as he took in the younger man's uniform.
The doctor quickly made his way across the room as Esposito moved back allowing the doctor access to Rick, "What happened?"
Without giving much detail, knowing the destruction to the room would have to be dealt with sooner or later Javier told the doctor what he knew for sure. "He was upset and started to hyperventilate, we couldn't get him to calm down and he passed out."
The doctor took the stethoscope from around his neck and placed it to Rick's chest, "His heart beat is still rapid, but it should start slowing down soon." He glanced at the nurse, "Karen could you get me a blood-pressure cuff and tell Mike we might need a gurney. I'm going to try and get him to come around, but we'll need to move him if he doesn't." The nurse made her way out of the room as the doctor reached into his pocket and pulled out one of the small ammonia packets that they sometimes used to when a person passed out.
The doctor broke the small packet and moved it toward Rick's face, "What's his name?" the doctor asked the trio across from him.
"Castle… Rick Castle." Ryan answered as they all watched the writer react to the smell under his nose.
Rick's immediate reaction was to jump slightly and try and pull away, but hands on both his shoulders kept him in place, "Mr. Castle, Can you hear me?" the doctor asked as the man before him slowly blinked his eye's open. Again it was confusion in his eye's as he looked from the unfamiliar doctor to the familiar faces of his friends.
It was Lanie that leaned toward him to speak; she'd stayed kneeling by his side, "Rick?" She automatically reached up, placing a comforting hand on his head.
"Lanie?" The writer mumbled, a sigh of relief and a slight smile crossed the woman's face as she glanced up at Javier and Kevin before turning her attention back to the man lying before her.
"I outta smack you for scaring us like that." She spoke softly, the usual clip-tone absent from the M.E.'s normal response.
Taking a deep-breath, Rick closed his eye's a second, trying to remember what had happened. It that moment Lanie felt him tense against her touch as his eyes snapped open meeting hers, "Kate?" the broken sound was back as his voice cracked.
"They're taking care of her, but you need to stay calm. You got upset and passed out on us, though I have to say next time we need to make sure anything within reach is bolted down." She smiled slightly again as she tried to keep him calm, and her only way of doing that was to slip into the normal snips she liked to take at him.
They all turned as the door opened again, the nurse and male orderly entered, the nurse handing the doctor the requested item. "Mr. Castle, I'm going to take your blood-pressure, then we'll try and sit you up." The doctor spoke as he worked, "You're going to be a little dizzy for a few minutes until all your vitals level out, but you should be okay with some fluids and rest."
"Like we're gonna get any rest anytime soon." Javier mumbled earning a stern glance from Lanie.
She knew this was rough on all of them, but right now Castle needed them and later they knew Kate would need them as well and for Lanie the only thing keeping her from falling apart herself was the broken man before her as she watched the doctor remove the blood-pressure cuff. "It's a little high, but under the circumstances. We'll give him a few minutes as his body continues to calm down and I'll check it again. Mr. Castle, we're going to set you up now, let us do the work and once you're up we'll give you a few minutes before we try and get you on your feet, okay?"
Lanie moved back as the male orderly came around and with a nod from Rick, the doctor and orderly slowly sat him up and helped him lean against the bank of cabinets. "You doing okay?" the doctor asked as Rick brought his hand up to the side of his head.
"Damn it…" Again it was Javier's mumbled curse and quick movement that drew Lanie's and Ryan's attention as he quickly made his way to the small sink in the room, pulling down a handful of paper towels, wetting them. Once he returned and knelt next to Castle it clicked in Lanie's mind what Esposito was doing.
She quickly knelt on the other side, next to the doctor as Javier passed her a few paper towels; each of them taking one of Rick's shaking hands in theirs, working to remove the dried red stain that he was now staring at, his breathing starting to pick up again. Lanie spoke softly as she glanced up toward the writer's pale face, "Just close your eye's a minute Castle, focus on breathing and we'll take care of this. I'm sure it's taking all you mother's effort to keep that daughter of yours out of this room, she really worried about you, so you try to stay calm and we'll get her in her, okay?"
Rick had tilted his head back and closed his eye's tight, any other time he might feel ashamed, embarrassed even that he was allowing his friends to see his like this, that they were actually having to clean blood off his hands because he couldn't at the moment. But another part of his mind could care less, it was the part that had fallen on the ground with Kate and wouldn't surface again until she was okay, when he could take her hand in his and stop them from shaking.
Rick sat there, his eye's closed as he felt his friends finish and the doctor place the cuff around his arm again. It was a quiet, fear-filled voice that pulled him from the darkness his mind was begging to slip into, "Daddy?"
Raising his head and opening his eye's his gaze fell onto the one person he loved more than anything, it was for that face only that he mustered the shadow of his usual smile; raising his arm toward his daughter as he spoke softly, "Hey Pumpkin."
At that Alexis slipped from her grandmother's grip and quickly made her way to her father's arms, her mumbled voice filtered to his ears as she pressed herself to him, "God, dad I was so scared, I didn't know what was happening and they wouldn't let me in…" Her voice faded as she cried against him.
"Shhh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry…I wasn't thinking, I'm sorry." He held his daughter tight to him, guilt washing over him as he was realizing the worry he'd caused everyone when they should have been focused on Kate.
The doctor's voice pulled Rick's attention form his daughter, "Mr. Castle, we're going to try and get you on your feet now, again let us do the work and let me know if you feel dizzy or light headed okay?"
"Yeah, alright." Rick said as Alexis moved back and stood, watching her father closely.
Alexis and Martha watched as the doctor and orderly pulled Rick up to his feet, keeping him leaning against the counter for added support. Lanie had moved back toward the door with Esposito and Ryan.
Again Rick closed his eyes upon standing, his hand coming to his face. "Dad?" Alexis's voice filtered through.
"I'm okay, just give me a second." His voice just barely a whisper.
"How are you feeling?" the doctor asked as he touched the writer's arm.
"A little dizzy but its passing." Blinking his eye's open slowly, he tried to smile at his daughter, needing to get the fearful expression off her face. She stepped up to him again wrapping her arms around him.
"Richard?" It was the first Martha had spoken since entering the room, first taking in the shock of the destruction then seeing the pale form of her son leaning against the counter with a doctor at his side.
His eye's met his mothers as she stepped closer, reaching her hand up to his face, "Oh, Richard." she whispered as he leaned into her touch, his hand coming up to hold hers against his face.
"I'm sorry mother…" He started but Martha quickly shushed him.
"We'll get through this. She'll get through this; you have to believe that, do you hear me?" Martha's voice was comforting and stern at the same time, much as it had been that night in the loft when Rick had returned home from his fight with Kate, just as it had been anytime his feeling for Kate affected his mood.
"Okay." He whispered as a slight, watery smile met her comforting one. Taking a deep breath he seemed to take in the room around him for the first time, "What did I do?" he mumbled.
Martha spoke up, "Don't you worry about it, I'll call Paula and have her get in touch with the hospital administrator."
Nodding slightly he reached up to rub his head again, "Mr. Castle?" for a moment Rick had forgotten the doctor was still a few feet from him.
"I just think I need to sit down a bit." Rick answered.
"You really need to try and take it easy and rest. You need to drink something, orange juicer preferably and if any of your symptoms worsen let someone know. I'll be back later to see how you're doing. I understand you all are with the officer that was brought in?" The physician asked.
Rick could only nod as he slowly pushed himself from the counter, Alexis wrapping her arm around her father's back to offer support. Slowly making their way to the door, Martha touched her son's shoulder as she fell in beside him.
Stopping as he came to Ryan, Esposito and Lanie, Rick looked at them, "I'm sorry guys, I just…" His voice chocked slightly.
"Look man, you don't have to explain anything." Esposito answered as the other two nodded, "Let's go see if there's any word yet."
"Yea, Jenni took Mr. Beckett back to the waiting area." Ryan said as he held the door open, Lanie going out first, followed by Rick and his family, Javier and Kevin coming up behind just incase their friend wavered and needed their help. In the hallway a nurse handed Martha a small container of orange juice as the group made their way back down the hallway.
Once reaching the waiting room, Rick saw Jim stand from his chair. Stepping from his daughter's arms the writer stopped in front of the father. "I'm sorry about all this, I'm sorry for not being fast enough to protect her…" Jim started to interrupt but Rick put his hand up, stopping him. "I promised you I'd try and protect her, I promised Roy, but more importantly I told her I'd always have her back and today I was too slow. I wish it had been me instead of her…" Rick paused a moment, he knew what he was about to say wouldn't come as a shock to any of those standing around him. Even the man before him, whom he'd only met once before today had somehow known how Rick felt about his daughter, actually calling him on it in the loft just a few short nights ago. "You were right that night, I love your daughter and though I was too slow to stop what happened today, I promise you this, I will do everything within my power to get her through this. I don't want you to lose another person you love and I'm not ready to lose someone I love." Rick finished watching Jim's face for his reaction to what he'd said.
Tears again welled in the older man's eyes, the memories of losing his wife all those years ago playing along side the memory from just a short time ago of his daughter falling to the ground, blood covering her. Jim looked at Rick intently, "I know she probably hasn't told you, I know how my Katie can be when she's scared, but she loves you too Rick and I know she wouldn't be able to recover from this without you by her side. You just make sure you do take care of my little girl when this is all over, she's all I have left." Jim's voice broke, this time Rick stepped forward and gave Kate's father a comforting hug as a new voice broke the silence of the room.
"Family of Katherine Beckett."