Don't own anything. This is my first White Collar fic and it is based on 3.16 and 4.1 because that's where I'm at in the show. Yes this is slash. No haters.

If I told you that I realized you're all I ever wanted

And it's killing me to be so far away

Would you tell me that you loved me too

And would we cry together

I Told You So – Carrie Underwood

Neal

Explaining the story of my life to a woman in Cape Verde feels so wrong. I feel like I should be saying this to someone else, somewhere else. Like I should be saying this to Peter in New York. It doesn't help that the nickname chosen for me is 'New York' and every time it's said the only thing I can think about is my life there.

I hate feeling like this. I'm a conman. A conman doesn't give away his heart. He tricks everyone into thinking he already has. So when did I let my guard down? When did the unthinkable happen? When did I, Neal Caffery, master forger and conman, fall in love? With an FBI agent. The same agent who caught me.

And now I have to live the rest of my life without him because I fucked up and let Agent Kramer outsmart me after years of evading Peter. Now, after finally finding the only one who had the power to make me stay, I have to run again. Maybe until the day I die.

I wonder what would happen if I went back home. What would Peter say if I told him I love him? Obviously it could never happen. Even if I could find a way to get to New York, Peter has Elizabeth and I would never try to destroy their marriage.

She makes him happy and that has to be good enough for me. After all, why would Peter Burke, FBI agent, want anything to do with a criminal?

Will you think that you're all alone

When no one's there to hold your hand

And all you know seems so far away and everything is temporary

Rest your head

I'm permanent

Permanent – David Cook

Elizabeth

I can see something in his eyes die every time he crosses out a place on the map. Peter may think he fools me but he doesn't. I can see right through that act. He is in love with Neal. I know he loves me and I know I can make him happy but I was there the night after he gave Neal the signal to run.

He loves me but he loves Neal too. And that's why, when he circled Cape Verde, I told him to go.

He looked at the map for the thousandth time since he got home. "Go."

"What?"

"Peter, don't play dumb. You know where he is. Go. Bring him home." Hope flared in his expression. "Are you sure, hon? I can find someone else to go."

I sighed then smiled. "You wouldn't be able to live with yourself if something happened to him. In the morning I want you out of this house and on a plane to Cape Verde. You're not allowed to come back unless Neal is with you."

He smiled back and replied. "I love you so much."

"I know you do. Be safe." There would be time to talk about Neal when they were both in New York again.

And all about the good times that we've been through

Could I wake up without you every day

And would I let you walk away

No, I can't learn to live without

And I can't give up on us now

I Just Can't Live A Lie – Carrie Underwood

Peter

I love my wife. She always knows the right thing to say and when to say it. It's a relief that she understands my need to protect Neal. I wouldn't be surprised if she already knows that my feelings towards Neal aren't entirely platonic.

Hopefully she doesn't have a problem with it. I don't know what I would do if I was forced to choose between El and Neal. I don't think I could.

I get up and go to the terminal when I hear the boarding call for my flight. Soon I'll be in Cape Verde and I'll see Neal. Maybe I'll be able to convince him to come back home.

I know Peter's POV is really short but I can't figure out how his character should come off as. I hope you liked it. If so, please review. If not, please review anyway and tell me why.

~Five-0Forever