A/N Written for a friend of mine, for her birthday.
======} ERIDAN: Fondly regard your matesprit.
You're not going to do that. You can't do that. He's dying, he's bleeding out and your shirt is soaked with the most hideous shade of red that you have ever seen, and he's dying.
You never even knew. That's the part that's getting to you the worst. Not even that he killed some of your friends. You're all dead anyway, by the looks of it. And you knew, you all knew, what he had to be going through. Karkat wasn't the only one suffering from hunger.
The worst thing was that you were his matesprit, and he never told you— never told anyone— about the color of his blood. He never trusted you enough.
He's too far gone to even speak. His breathing is weak. It may be just your imagination. All you can do is hold him against your chest as that sick red blood comes out, and wonder if he's dead already and you're clutching a corpse.
It wasn't supposed to be this way.
You can see your moirail sitting in the corner of the room, leaning against the wall near a busted, smoking computer. You know what she wants to say, and you're grateful that she is choosing to say nothing.
She wants to thank you. For saving her.
Instead she bites her lip. Opens her mouth, lets it hang, and closes it, in a sequence that repeats several times before she can find something to say. "Y-you need to get ready. Everybody eats," she clarifies.
"Not right now."
"Yes now," she says, and some kind of spark returns to her. Some of her blood is mingling with Karkat's on the floor, but she's not a scared girl anymore. She's your moirail.
You want to tell her to get out, but you're her moirail too, and she needs… she needs to fit into her role and be her role and nothing else, and leave her feelings behind.
"I'm sorry, Vvris."
"It isn't your fault."
"I should have done somethin."
"It's Tavros who should have seen something. You did what you could."
"I wwas the wworst fuckin knight a hope ever. Look at us now."
Silence fills up the room. At some point Vriska leaves her spot in the corner and takes Karkat's body away. You don't notice it happening. You just realize, suddenly, that his body is gone and so is Vriska.
There is a beep from one of the computers. You register it only barely, but then the beep comes again and you are forced to acknowledge its reality.
There comes a third beep.
It's from your computer.
Someone is trolling you. Without a handle, you see.
Mr. Ampora. If you would like the honest truth, then there are a number of things that you could have done to prevent this tragedy.
I could enumerate them for you, if you so desired.
But rest assured, Mr. Ampora, that you could not have been expected to see any of them. In that regard, your moirail is quite correct.
You don't respond at first.
In fact, you could argue that Paradox Space prevented you from seeing these things.
CA: wwhat do you mean
I mean that you were screwed and the game was rigged.
If you would like to blame someone, then you can blame myself.
It appears that I made a dreadful mistake, at which point our conversation now was made inevitable. Along with all that transpired up to it.
The proper course of events must be brought to pass, and Paradox Space will ensure that this is possible.
CA: wwho are you
I have many names. You may call me Mr. Vanilla Milkshake.
Terezi…
CA: did you come here to gloat
What reason would I have for that?
CA: its your fault that wwere out here on this meteor
CA: wwe wwouldnt have failed if you hadnt sabotaged us
I will admit that you are partly correct, but if the Witch and Sylph failed to ask the right questions then that is hardly my fault.
CA: so youre sayin that you didnt mean for this to happen
CA: I kind a doubt that
It was my sole intention to arrange this present meeting between us.
But you would have failed no matter what I did. Ask the Sylph of Time about doomed timelines.
CA: wwhats so important that you had to kill Terezi and Gamz to talk with me
You can make things right, as it were.
CA: oh yeah
CA: and wwhat can I do
CA: wwhy wwould you care anywway if you wwere the one that messed it up
The timeline was already doomed. What I have done to you and your friends has no bearing on the Alpha Timeline. But without my actions, and yours, there can be no Alpha Timeline.
CA: wwhat happens in the alpha timeline
A universe is created, as all of us desire.
CA: and then wwhat
CA: im not stupid
CA: i remember wwhat you did before and i wwant more information
Wise boy.
The path will be very hard, and some of your friends will die anyway.
By your hand, I might add.
CA: mine
CA: wwhy
Every story needs a villain.
This timeline's was Karkat.
CA: you
CA: you got him to do this didnt you
I would be lying if I washed my hands completely of the matter, and I have a policy against lying. But I did not tell him to do anything, either.
I talked to Karkat longer than I did the Witch and the Sylph. I was the very first to contact him on Trollian, even before yourself.
It was easy to make him paranoid. The foundation for the work was already there. No matter how much he cared for you, he could still not bring himself to overcome sweeps of carefully-built suspicion.
It unsettled him even further to learn of my involvement, however small, in the disaster that the Reckoning was for all of you.
Karkat had never questioned my trustworthiness before that point. I never lied to him, after all. Even afterwards, he still understood that I never lied. He felt deceived anyway.
He was a stupid boy. A predictable boy.
But he still could not reject the mindset that I had built up in him. Losing trust in me only caused his fears to fester.
And then, hiding on the meteor with the rest of you, all food gone, and hunger making a fever of his mind, there was nothing left but for madness to sprout from his paranoia.
It was not my most delicate work.
But you can save him.
CA: by making a new wworld
By changing history.
CA: you said that I was going to be the villain
Not the villain. A villain. There is a difference.
You will be petty, selfish, and short-sighted. You will be forgotten and dredged up in memory only to be despised.
But you will play exactly the role that you must play.
Every note of the symphony, no matter how small, is essential for its perfection.
CA: wwhat about the others
There will be deaths. But there is, possibly, hope for any of them.
I will not lie to you. There are black spots in my knowledge. There are things which even I cannot perceive, and how long Karkat will survive, or if the dead will return to life, I cannot tell you.
But this is the best chance that you can give him.
CA: wwhy me
CA: wwhy am I so important
Your world and your lives were to be carefully sculpted in order to ensure my existence and that of universe's to come, both of these things in turn making certain the existence of my master.
This was to be done, in part, by a servant of my master. It was my duty to instruct her in all her duties, but one day she took advantage of a hole in my omniscience and she escaped. Even knowing that it would happen, I did not know how it would happen, and so I could not prevent it.
CA: escaped
CA: you wwere keeping her prisoner
She would hardly have stayed of her own will.
Ungrateful little girl.
She took advantage of one of the blind spots in my awareness, and instead of fulfilling the will of our master she chose to turn history toward her own ends.
I have been able to minimize her effect. Nevertheless, a doomed timeline was inevitable from the moment that she escaped.
This must be undone.
CA: wwhat am I supposed to do
CA: you should be talking to aradia
I was never able to fully anticipate what would be needed to bring her actions in line with what was necessary.
Her closeness to the Rogue of Void led to an abundance of holes in my omniscience. I cannot perceive her as clearly as I would like, and now she will not even respond to my messages.
CA: I cant begin to wwonder wwhy
You should be flattered, Mr. Ampora. It is rare for someone to know more about a subject than I, even a subject as mysterious to me as the Sylph of Time.
CA: eq has to know more than me
CA: or kan
CA: wwhy not talk to someone wwho shares a quadrant wwith her
Because you are the Knight of Hope.
This is your purpose, just as it is the sylph's to heal and repair what went wrong.
CA: and then im a bad guy
CA: wwhat do i do
CA: in the new timeline I mean
You kill several of your friends and destroy the future of your species.
The Page of Doom and Mage of Light— although I should say that their roles, as are all of yours, will be different— will nevertheless survive their deaths.
CA: really
I do not lie. Even the Witch and Sylph have admitted as much.
You do not respond. After a few minutes, Trollian beeps with another message.
You're dying anyway.
CA: yeah so
CA: maybe there are things wworse than that
Is this how you want it to end, wondering whether you will get to die before the power goes out and you are left to starve in the dark?
A good chance is all that I can offer Karkat. But isn't that better than what lay in store for him in this timeline?
CA: because a wwhat you did
It was the only leverage that I could exert.
And it's pretty good leverage. There's no denying that.
You think about the blood in your shirt, the gray fabric soaked and stained with candy red. And then you go and talk with Aradia.