Ok. This is my very first
"You never loved me," I said simply.
It wasn't a question. And by the look on his face, I knew my assumption was correct. I let it sink in during the moments of his silence.
"I'm sorry," he whispered.
"No your not." I looked dead into his eyes. It was the first time I had looked at his face since he walked into my room. "Your not sorry at all, you can try to look as sincere as you want. I know you, I loved you."
"Loved?" He looked a little hurt.
"Well I'm not going to sit around here and pine over you. I'll get over it." It was a total lie, but I was not going to let him know that. My voice was cold. Good, I thought,he could use a little hostility.
He didn't say anything. He looked as if he was waiting for me to scream and yell, or storm out of the room, I would not grant him that satisfaction. "Why?" I asked, although I knew he couldn't answer with the reply I needed.
"I couldn't stop myself."
I let out a very dry chuckle, "No stupid, why did you choose now?"
"Oh, I don't know. Convenience I guess."
It fit. School was mundane, it didn't really matter what time of the year it was, even though we had just started the school year. It was simply connivance. I replayed the words over and over in my head, trying to make them true.
Then I did one of the most ridiculous things I have ever done. I smiled. I smiled only because I was reminiscing. I remembered the beginning, our start. He was always so protective, caring, comforting. Then slowly but surely, he grew distant, receding back into the norm of what is high school, not really paying any attention to me. He became bland, emotionless, and nothing I did ever seemed to change that.
"Don't say that," he whispered. I hadn't realized that I had spoken my thought out laud.
"But its true," I stated dryly. I'd had enough of this crap, he needed to leave before I lashed out. "Leave," I said firmly, looking at the door.
"Alright." His voice was soft. Too soft. It was pissing me off, his calmness, his unattachment. "Just answer me one question," he pleaded.
"You don't deserve it." I was fighting the pain, the hurt as I spoke through clenched teeth.
"Humor me? One last time?"
I just stared at him, unmoving. He took my silence as a yes. "Did you truly love me?"
An almost animalistic growel escaped my chest, vibrating my lungs. "Yes, yes I did." My reply was a gasp. The air left my lungs too quickly.
He smiled, more to himself. The hurt I couldn't handle before, now overflowed to my head. The sting, the searing burn of pain ran from my chest down to my finger tips causing me to clutch my shoulder.
He saw my reaction and stepped closer to me. I sent him a warning glare that stopped his movements.
"It was magic at first, no doubt about it." His pathetic attempt to comfort my breaking heart only made me wince.
"Yes," I said. "Love can be magical," I took a deep breath, deluding some of my pain. " But sometimes, magic can be just..." I blinked as a single tear fell down from my hate filled eyes directly staring into his. "... an illusion."
Then everything went back.
So how depressing was that? Lol. I was in one of those moods. Well, please review and I'll prolly message everybody back that does!!
-Holly
Oh, PS. Here's the quote that I got for the last part, I just tweaked it a bit:
Love can be magic,
But sometimes,
Magic can be just,
An illusion.
Its by someone but I really can't remember.