Disclaimer: I own nothing!~
It was absolutely the wrong time for her eyes to be acting this way. Three level three akumas were hovering around; waiting to attack, and all her eyes could take in were her three comrades in front of her.
Her purple eyes swept in a circular arc, from frowning Kanda to grinning Lavi to calm Allen. She frowned in turn, and wondered why she'd never seen her friends as young men before. From where she stood, all she saw was Kanda, Lavi and Allen standing shoulder to shoulder, all with innocence at the ready. Of course, Lenalee was usually too busy killing akuma to spare much eye-space for her male comrades, but right now, they unsuspectingly provided her with eye candy.
Lenalee, despite her maternal nature and friendliness, was still a teenage girl, a teenage girl who lived around a mostly male population back at the Headquarters. And like any other teenage girl, she too dreamed of a happy-ever-after. For some reason or other, she chose that moment to deliberate if any of the three males would someday become her husband, the father of her children-to-be, and the one who would lead her through dank streets of cold nights to the sunlit fields of happy day.
Perhaps…
"Lenalee!" Allen's voice cut her thoughts, and they hung dangling from thin strings as she took stock of the situation. It seemed like an akuma was flying towards her…
And so she cut the train of her thoughts and set to work.
*
Lenalee huffed. She had tried all day, but she could not yet get that stubborn picture out of her mind's eye. All that day she had lain on her bed in the Headquarters, legs dangling off the bedspread, a becoming frown plastered on her face.
It appeared again, that annoying picture. Kanda, Lavi and Allen were standing side by side, preparing to battle the akuma. Every little detail was magnified in her memory; they buzzed in her brain, and she found she had to confront that picture. Squeezing her eyes tight, she tried to tackle the issue at hand. The root of the problem, she decided, was that she had girlish dreams for her future. Marriage was not yet on the cards, but romance intrigued her.
Do I truly love any of them?
Lenalee frowned again, and considered them one by one.
Kanda is quite handsome, in a pretty boy kind of way. And he's so tall and silent – which woman doesn't wish for an inscrutable, melancholic hero to sweep her off her feet? Besides, I've known him ever since we were little. I know his likes, his dislikes, and I think I know why he prefers to hide his feelings under a stony cold interior. With my love he could thaw like a gnarled tree in late-come spring, perhaps growing into a mirthful tree of splendour. Poor Kanda. Not to mention that his hair is really pretty too. I'd love to comb my fingers through his thick silky tresses and style them for him…
Lavi's charismatic and really charming. His cheeky grin sometimes makes me feel like swooning. He could sweep a girl off her feet any day, even if they were enriched with the power of innocence. He deserves to be cared for; he needs someone to open up that Bookman heart of his, to teach him to love and to love life itself. Who knows, I might be the one holding that key. He never fails to make me laugh when I'm down, and I know he cares for me too. There was this once he asked me to go out with him while we were in the Ark. Of course, I turned him down, but I've never forgotten it.
Allen-kun is a whole different person. I've never met anyone as noble, self-sacrificing and sweet as he is. He's so cute! I've only known him for barely a year, but I feel like I've known him all my life. He's as friendly as can be, and always so polite, but deep down I know he suffers. I want to be the one who can comfort him as we wade through murky waters. I want to be the one who sweeps the icicles of his tormented heart away. I want to be the one who offers him another purpose to live. I want to hug him when he's sad, to kiss his tears away, and to sing him to sleep with sweet lullabies. His white hair tugs at my heartstrings every time I glance at him.
*
A year passed, and then that evening dawned.
"Lenalee."
"Yes, Allen-kun?"
"I have a question for you. Will you please walk with me in the gardens?"
"Okay." Why does he seem so serious?
The duo strolled in the moor-like gardens behind the Headquarters. They passed shadowed trees and dark bushes, until Allen finally came to a stop. He was silhouetted against the weak glimmer of the rising moon, and he turned to face her.
"Lenalee."
"Yes, Allen-kun?"
"I…"
"Go on." Lenalee smiled encouragingly.
"I love you! I… I want to ask you to marry me as soon as this darned war is over."
Lenalee was taken aback. Under the starry cover of night her face darkened, and she frowned. She had never finished thinking through her dilemma of yesteryear, and she still did not know who she loved. Or so she thought; her subconscious had experienced stirrings of longing for one person, but of that she did not know, nor understand.
"Allen-kun, I… We're so young! I can't promise you anything. I'm so sorry!" Ready to burst into tears, she ran from him. And that was the last she saw of him for nearly a year.
*
"Reever, get ready a team of exorcists to retrieve Allen-kun. We need to be quick."
Komui's voice and the words he had said cut Lenalee to the core. Standing outside the science department with her daily tray of coffee, she had overheard her brother's latest instructions. That could only have meant…
Is Allen-kun in danger?
Slim hands suddenly grown weak trembled with fear. The cups hit the ground with a loud thud, sending Komui flying out of his office. Seeing her brother, Lenalee clutched at him, tears gathering in her limpid eyes. she flew at him and finally succeeded in collaring him.
"How's Allen?!"
"Calm down, Lenalee. We're hoping for the best here. He has a strong chance of survival."
Survival. That one word burned in Lenalee's mind like wildfire, throwing all her doubts and caution of the past years into disarray. So Allen-kun was dying. She swayed on the spot.
"Nii-san, let me go too."
"You're in no fit state to go, Lenalee. I'm sending Kanda and Lavi."
*
The ways of the world are strange, and nature's laws are hidden from mortal men who are doomed to tread only known paths during their sojourn on earth. That night was one of the worst Lenalee had ever endured. It was dull and long and painful, as if she were slowly but surely being lowered into a boiling vat of fat. Fear burned in her without respite, and her heart ever bled for the death of he who held it.
She sat all night by a lone candle, praying earnestly with heart and soul that Allen would not be taken from her, she who had refused him as a result of her idealistic ideas of love. With tight heart and grief-swollen eyes she held vigil throughout the stormy night, even as thunder cackled with the malignance of a thousand years outside her window.
Threads of needle-sharp rain struck her window; the dark trees below waved their bony boughs, shaking their ancient fingers at her. In the water flowing from the eyeless sky she saw Allen's face peering at her through rivers of mist. His good hand stretched out – he beckoned to her to join him, to fall with him, to dwell for eternity in the cascades of water in the waterfall beyond the life that is. His pale face plastered against the window, and she cried again that night for the hundredth time.
Sometime near dawn she fell asleep, only to be woken soon after by Reever.
"Allen's back."
The girl bolted upright, eyes shining with relief.
"He's all right? He won't die?"
"Nope, he'll be fine."
Day had never seemed so joyful and beautiful to her before. The red sun ascended his aerial throne, and thrust the world into bright morning, and Lenalee flew through the Order on the wings of joy.
Later in the day, Lenalee went to visit Allen.
"Lenalee! You cried, didn't you?" Allen seemed sad to see her teary eyes.
She didn't answer. With the little strength he had, Allen placed his palm against Lenalee's cheek. That warm touch brought back many memories to her; she'd lost count of the number of times that same warm touch had comforted her through her grief-fuelled tears.
"You're safe." The tears once again began to well up in her purple eyes.
"Lenalee. I want to ask you something."
She looked up, surprised.
"Will you marry me when this war is over?"
Lenalee could not speak. She knew now that she had always loved Allen, ever since she first got to know him. How could anyone not love such a noble person?
Memories of their time together raced through her mind. There was once when they were in the rewinding town, and she slapped Allen. There was the time when he'd pulled her out of the way of a cart that was speeding towards her while they were in that town where General Cross's sponsor stayed. She could still remember the salty tears that she shed for Allen after Tyki Mikk supposedly disposed of him. She could remember the flip-flop of her heart when she saw him again, that night in Edo. She could remember the worry and tension she felt as he battled Tyki in the old Ark, and the jealousy that tore through her when Road kissed Allen. And most of all, she could feel the adrenaline pumping through her veins, and the blush lining her cheeks.
How could she not have known that Allen would become her soulmate? Why had she taken so long to realise that the one she loved was Allen? There was only one remedy, and Allen was still babbling on.
"I know I'm not good enough for you; my arm's deformed, and I'm not the most handsome guy in the world, and I don't really deserve you, but I - "
"YES!"
A/N: This started off as a really short oneshot that was going to compare the hair colour of the three guys. Somewhere along the way, it turned into this haha. But i'm going to write that oneshot anyway and post it under Circular (my ongoing collection of oneshots) when I'm done. I think this one is one of my longest oneshots ever :D I know Lenalee isn't really IC here. But i like it, all the same, despite all its obvious shortcomings heh. Ohhh and i got the idea for the plot from the Anne of Green Gables series of books hahaha. You know, where Anne turns Gilbert's proposal down and later realises she loves him when he gets seriously ill. Ahahaha.
So yes, please do review, and thanks for reading!~
(And i'm really sorry if the quality of this fic is rather poor. Forgive me!)
