The Girl Who Waited

Rating: PG-13 (for heavy doses of fluff nonsense, then the mid-rate violence and ANGST. SO MUCH ANGST.)

Fandom: Carmilla

Ship: Hollstein. Lots and lots of Hollstein. Little bit of LaFerry, and Zeta Society (mixed with an unhealthy dose of Hollence angst too), but mainly Hollstein.

Author's Notes: I've been seeing a post floating around my dash about dating an immortal and finding out they'd been chasing down your reincarnations from the first time you fell in love, and instantly thought of these two love bats. Beware contains many many many instances of Carm being a giant sappy sweetheart, and tons of little butterfly kisses. Starts Christmas time shortly after THE kisses in s1e36. and follows them semi-chronologically forward from there (using my timeline not the current S2 one I got sucked into this universe) I am so sorry CreamPuffs, I found a dark place and it grew into more.

(I'm including the first part due to the fact that some people want and/or like to read it all at once, or never read part of it.)

The Girl Who Waited

Laura's eyes were closed, but even then she could still see the image of their kiss in her head clear as day. They had kissed. Everything she had ever hoped for had finally happened. She stretched her arms up and over her head, keeping very quiet in order to not wake her slumbering roommate. Lauren's eyes fluttered open and a small yawn escaped her mouth.

"Morning, Cupcake." She heard from across the room.

"Carm!" She squealed as she panicked. "I was trying not to wake you, I'm so sorry!" She buried her head in her hands and wiped her eyes. Hardly any time at all had passed, and yet here she was already making a fool of herself in front of her new girlfriend and blushing like a fool.

Carmilla stared at the beautiful brunette sitting across the room from her and just smiled. This girl was even cuter than the last, she thought to herself as she stood up to cross the small gap between their beds. Her eyes shut for just a second, long enough for a blink, but also long enough for a small memory of a lit ballroom and dancing to come flooding back.

"I've been waiting for you to wake up for about half an hour or so, now, Sweetheart. I just wanted to do this before you left for class." Carmilla said in a hushed tone, pushing her past life back into her memories as she leaned in and kissed Laura gently. Laura grabbed Carmilla's arm and pulled her down to eye level, from where she was sitting on her bed, and kissed her again.

"What? You think I'd leave for class without that?" The tiny girl chuckled as she stood up and sauntered to the armoire in the back of the room. She pulled the doors open to reveal a messy heap of falling leather and black tank tops, causing her to laugh even more.

"Carm, I'm gonna need you to clean this up eventually." She chortled as she stepped backward out of the way of the mountain of clothing. She bent over and picked up a small, red and gold Silas University sweatshirt and popped it over her head with ease as she spun to quickly face her roommate. The vampire was sprawled out on Laura's bed asleep with an elated grin on her face, the little yellow pillow smothering her nose and eyes.

Laura, in a rush to get to her Journalism class, ran to her girlfriend's side and kissed her cheek lightly before leaving the door wide open as she fluttered out of the room. Carmilla, once she was sure Laura was far down the hallway and almost out of the complex, sat up straight and tossed the pillow aside.

She rushed to the closet, folding everything she saw and putting them in neat piles before slamming the door. Next she went and rearranged the room, pushing her bed and Laura's against the western wall, and Laura's quaint work desk against the eastern. She then stripped both beds of their sheets and pillows (except for the sacred yellow pillow) and pulled the rug up off the floor, tossing them into the empty hallway, a note attached to it just for Perry stating that Carmilla would clean that up later.

Content with her work there, Carmilla sat and organised the refrigerator, making extra sure to put her container of "soy milk" in the back behind Laura's 1% milk and her occasional energy drink for "long night study sessions". Then Carmilla took to tidying Laura's work desk, neatly stacking all of the notebooks underneath the half-empty cookie box and putting the pens in a mug that had been pulled off the counter behind the newfound super bed, and placed by the computer monitor with a smile.

Surveying the room one last time and checking everything off the mental checklist she had formed over the past week or so as she listened to Laura nag her about her reluctance to do her chores, Carmilla sat down in the computer chair and heaved a heavy sigh of relief and letting the memory of the dance come flooding back to her.

December 31st, 1698

The ballroom sparkled with gold and silver decorations, a Christmas tree stood behind the orchestra as it played for the swirling room of dancing and laughing couples. Everyone else paled in comparison to the couple in the centre of the ballroom however, the two girls so lost in each other they could not tell the whole room had stopped and started to stared at them.

The tall, dark haired girl had on a flowing red ball gown, it was cut slimly and rolled effortlessly down her sides. The petite, fairer brunette was wearing a light blue, more traditional ball gown and it looked just as beautiful as they did together, on her. The band master turned to see what the musicians had all begun to gawk at when he saw the dancers who had taken centre stage with their waltz.

Grinning he quietly ushered for the band to pull out the new piece they had gotten, and as the strings began to whisper the first few bars, the girl in the red dress leaned down and pecked the fairer girl on the cheek.

"Hey Carm, Laura in?" LaFontaine asked as they rummaged through the fridge. Carmilla got a frustrated scowl on her face as she turned to look at them from her seat, irritated that her beautiful dream had been interrupted.

"No, she's not you babbling idiot. If you wanted food you could have asked, I just cleaned that." Carmilla scrunched up her brow again as they walked past her; she hated their smell for some reason, it bothered her. But the fact that they were there, messing up her hard work, bothered her more.

LaFontaine stopped dead in their tracks and put the food down. They turned around the entire dorm and smiled at the work they saw Carmilla had done. Carmilla had turned her back to them and was shopping for —- was that a rug and coffee table? They shook their head and walked over behind the brooding vampire and put a hand on her shoulder.

"You really love that tiny little thing, don't you." They whispered, teasing Carmilla as they did. Carmilla let out a disgruntled "hmmrph" and waved her hand towards the door, and they took their cue to leave.

Shortly after she closed all of the web browsers on Laura's computer and was sure her orders were sent to the proper stores, Carmilla stepped out into the cold, snowy afternoon and let another fantasy-like memory slip into her consciousness.

December 23rd, 1776

"Carm, c'mon!" A tiny brunette pulled on the vampire's dress' sleeve as they rushed down the street of London.

Snow flurried around the couple and the crisp air felt cold and numbing to Carmilla in comparison to the little hand wrapped so neatly inside hers. She let the hand slip out of hers and rush ahead to the storefront of this cute dress shop, while Carmilla stood a few feet down the sidewalk and watched in awe at the girl she had fallen so in love with yet again.

The girl stopped and pressed her face against the window and Carmilla smiled, throwing a loving glance in her direction before she wiped a solemn tear from her eye. It seemed fitting that they started at this shop, in the same spot where the ballroom used to sit. But the girl would never remember that, it was a part of Carmilla's dreams now.

Laura returned to the room to find it completely rearranged and she just smiled at the thought of Carmilla doing so much work, just for her. Then she realised Carmilla had done EVERYTHING Laura had asked of her in the past week, and she started to tear up a little bit. Laura sat down on the newly formed queen size bed and just took the whole scenery in.

Carmilla returned, Chinese takeout in hand, to find Laura wrapped up in the last remaining blanket. She sighed and set the food down on the table in the back corner of the room, laid down next to Laura, and kissed her forehead.

"Laur?" She asked tentatively, trying to be absolutely positive the other girl was asleep before wrapping her arms around her. Damn the food, she thought, I need this more. And she once again slipped back into her happiest memories.

December 24th, 1867

Manhattan's streets were crowded that evening, but that didn't seem bother neither Carmilla or the small brunette 7 year old who was zig-zagging across the sidewalk edging her way through the hustle and bustle of it all. Carmilla stood in the alleyway and watched as a nanny frustratedly chased after the tiny girl.

"Elizabeth! Elizabeth Louise! Come back here!" The nanny shouted down the street, and Carmilla chuckled.

"Elizabeth ...", she whispered as if that one word were the most precious thing in the whole world.

Both girls awoke to the sound of Perry muttering under her breath.

"This simply cannot be allowed in the House Rules book…" She exclaimed as she saw the beds pushed against one wall. Carmilla rolled over and kissed Laura, carefully taking in the way the girl smelled of peppermint, and inwardly sighed as Laura smiled in return.

"I'm putting a lock on that damn door, creampuff." Carmilla growled as she sat straight up. Laura tugged playfully at Carmilla's t-shirt dragging her back to the bare mattresses.

"If we're quiet, she might go away." Laura let a giggle escape from her as she rolled over on top of Carmilla and gave her a deep kiss and Carmilla let out a purr. Perry spun around from where she was standing observing the cleaned desk to see Laura and Carmilla kissing, they had flipped again and Carmilla's hands pinned Laura to the bed; the lone blanket was discarded to the floor.

"CHRIST, you two!" Perry exclaimed. Laura and Carmilla exchanged giddy smiles and kissed again quickly.

"Well-" Laura started

"You could always leave." Carmilla smirked a finishing remark as she batted at Perry with one hand. Perry smiled, reminiscing on her younger days and just stood there.

"Well I'm not leaving until Carmilla explains all of this." She demanded, stomping her foot down dramatically as she got to /this/ and flailing her arms about. Carmilla let out a huff and flicked her hands into a generic begone motion. Perry sighed as she realised she was getting nowhere with the girls, tossed her hands in the air, and went writhing out the doorway.

"Now where was I, creampuff?" Carmilla growled surly as she turned back to Laura, a gleam of playfulness in her eyes. Laura blushed and giggled as she kissed Carmilla between the eyes.

"Dinner's cold." Laura remarked as Carmilla rolled over to face the window. The sky outside was a warm purple and she could tell there was a storm on it's way.

January 16th, 1955

The Welsh countryside glistened with the newly fallen, crisp snow, but dark clouds still hung deep over the sky. Carmilla stood at the doorway of the house, a piping glass of hot chocolate in her hands, waiting for the young woman who was frolicking in the snow to get cold.

"Are you almost done, dearie?" She called out, her voice barely splitting the chilling winds. The woman whipped her was around and gave a warming gesture for her girlfriend to join her. Carmilla let out a laugh and raised the mug, causing the woman to come dashing back towards the door.

"Mmmmrrrph I love you, Carm." She exclaimed as she kissed the vampire and pawed at the warm drink.

"I love you, too, Cupcake." Carmilla whispered back, almost inaudibly as she choked back tears. I always have, she added to herself, three centuries and I swear I always will.

Christmas lights were strung around the perimeter of the ceiling as Danny and Laura sat at Laura's desk working on her finale's essay; Carmilla sat curled up on their bed an Edith Wharton book in her hands.

"Whelp. That's about all I can do for you, Ms. Hollis, but I'm sure a genius like you will be fine." Danny flirted with Laura as she stood to leave.

A low growl escaped Carmilla's clenched teeth. She understood why Laura didn't want to tell Danny they were together; Danny was a great help to Laura when it came to studying and Laura was scared if Danny knew Carmilla and her were together she would stop helping. But in the same respect Carmilla hated seeing Danny flirting with her Laura. The moment Danny was out of room, Carmilla stood up and crossed to the desk, placing an arm around her girlfriend as she sat on her lap.

"Must she flirt with you whilst you work, Creampuff?" She asked sullenly, almost poutingly. Laura just grinned and kissed Carmilla's shoulder. A muffled response followed, but Carmilla allowed herself to imagine Laura saying something to the effect of "You worry too much, dear." Carmilla just smiled and kissed Laura's forehead.

"I'm only protective of you, cupcake, because I care. And I won't always have this time here with you." She whispered into Laura's ear as she pulled the young girl towards their bed.

7 months went by and Carmilla spent her days wrapped up in the life of her lovely girlfriend. All the smiles and laughter and the Summer Society parties, all the late night kisses when Laura would have nightmares.

Then the news came. The call had come while Carmilla was out getting their weekly order of Pad Thai from the place on the corner, and when she returned she found Laura sitting in a messy pile of clothes with her suitcase wide open on the bed, sobbing and a total wreck.

"Laur? Baby, what's wrong?" Carmilla whispered as she slid along the bed frame to sit next to her mess of a girlfriend, kissing Laura's forehead lightly. Laura's whole body shook with tears as she gasped for air trying to muster strength enough strength to choke out one single word.

Cancer.

Carmilla pulled Laura into her side and kissed her forehead again.

"Oh sweetie. I'm so sorry." Then pure terror struck her as she realised that Laura had only said one word. Not who. Just what. Deep inside her she knew this would happen to her, she just always thought she would have more time. Laura stood and furiously threw things into a suitcase as she wiped tears from her eyes. Carmilla swore she heard her mutter something about needing plane tickets immediately, so she grabbed her laptop and began searching. Then she connected two and two. The only reason they ever flew was to visit Laura's dad back in the US. Laura's dad was sick. She half sighed in relief as she bought two first class tickets on the next flight out then realised what that would still mean.

Laura and her dad were very close since it was always just the two of them. Losing him would absolutely wreck her. The entire flight there, Laura sat in silence with her headphones in, head tilted back against the seat and tears still in her eyes. Carmilla pondered the meaning of her life with a glass of Pepsi in waiting just in case her little Creampuff got thirsty. Laura's head slowly rolled over and rested on Carmilla's shoulder as the plane came down and landed at JFK. Not wanting to wake her, Carmilla carried Laura off the plane and to their car where their luggage was already waiting thanks to Carmilla's friend she had called in a favour with. Resting Laura in the back seat, Carmilla gave the driver very specific directions.

Months went by and Laura remained by her father's side every moment she was allowed to. After a month, LaFontaine flew in. After two, a concerned Perry. Four months of not seeing Laura in class and Danny flew in with Kirsch in tow.

"Babe why did we have to come to this smelly city anyways?" Kirsch complained as Danny drug him through the JFK airport. Danny just grimaced, because she wasn't even sure herself fully. Kirsch cringed as another strong smell hit his overly sensitive nose, but went with it. His lady wanted him to be here and he wouldn't argue it.

Mister Hollis had only been given six months to live, but he opted for the chemo treatments anyways. He looked pale, and cold, and never had any energy.

"Wow. It's almost like he's a freak like you." Danny spat towards Carmilla as she walked into the crowded hospital room. Carmilla hissed and pulled the sleeping Laura closer to her on the couch reminding Danny she didn't really have to come. Kirsch wrapped his arm around Danny and rested on her shoulder. The whole room just felt depressed until LaFontaine let out a whoop.

"GUYS! I've got it!" They exclaimed. Laura snapped awake and rubbed some sleep out of er eyes as she turned to face them.

"It's the week before Christmas. Let's decorate for him!" Carmilla slouched back in her chair and let out a sigh of disapproval, before Laura squealed and hugged them.

"Oh LaF! That's a brilliant idea thank you!" She exclaimed as she pulled everyone in for a huddle.

"Now here's the plan ..."

Carmilla shut her eyes and was barely paying attention to what her darling love, because her mind was wandering to the past again

December 31, 1977

Carmilla was lost. She had yet to find the next incarnation of the little girl she had fallen in love with, had scoured the earth for her. Then the panic set it.

What if she's dead dead. My little creampuff. Dead.

She wiped a tear off her eye and told herself to remain strong. She lifted her nose again and sniffed the air when the strained trail of hot chocolate and baking chocolate chip cookies. She followed the scent trail closely, weaving in and out of the city streets until she got to this lovely little hut just outside the town; a brunette around 25 standing in the kitchen window holding a glass of hot chocolate with the window open, as if inviting the scent to draw vampire nearer to her. Carmilla carefully snuck to the tree closest to the window and peered over the branches to look inside and noticed that the brunette had cookies cooling on the table below the window as well as a small pile of catnip.

Carmilla grinned, and phased down into a small black house cat before jumping up onto the window ledge.

I'm home, darling. I'm home.

The whole room looked beautiful, paper snowflakes were strung in arches along the ceiling, and garland wrapped the bottom of Mister Hollis' bed. The girls talked to the Attending on Mr. Hollis' floor so they could get permission to redecorate the room, and painted a Christmas tree along the wall opposite his bed, and decorated with beautiful fabric ornaments and tinsel bought from the general store a block over. Exhausted, Laura and Carmilla collapsed on the couch by his bed; LaFontaine and Perry in the chair across the room, with Danny and Kirsch curled up on top of each other like puppies on the floor. Carmilla was the first to stutter awake from their much needed slumber, only to discover Mr. Hollis in tears.

"You all have taken such care of me." He whispered, almost inaudible to human ears. Carmilla lifted Laura up and laid her flat on the couch before going to the latter's father's side. Carmilla took his hands in hers and gave him a long look of understanding, before Mr. Hollis sighed and told Carmilla the exact thing she had always hoped to hear.

When Laura woke up the first thing she saw was her girlfriend on one knee with a Tiffany's box in one hand and a dozen roses in the other. She was shocked, barely saying a word other than, "Oh Carm."

Carmilla didn't look up from the floor, she didn't want anyone else to see her tears as they slid down her face, because at this point all eyes were on the vampire clad in a black suit.

"Laura Hollis. You are my world." She could feel her face redden as she stumbled for her words. "I have loved you for a thousand years. More than that even. I want to make it forever with you."

A wrinkled hand reached out for Mircalla's from the bedside, and pulled it towards the elderly woman's face. She kissed it twice before mouthing 'I love you Mircalla.' Then the hand dropped, and the eyes slid closed. The twenty-something looking lady squeezed the hand twice and slide the gold ring off the finger of the woman who lay motionless in bed.

"This is the ring I gave you the first time I asked you this. Every time I asked you this. I'm a sucker for you, Laura Hollis. Elle. Elizabeth. Sarah. Every single one of your lives I've been a sucker for you. You're the one person I felt like I should save." Carmilla choked back her tears, her voice cracking on the last syllable of 'save'. Laura's eyes were clenched shut, tears flooding out of both corners. Behind them both, Perry swore she could see the heart monitor that had been static for minutes blimp up and down for a few beats then go back to nothingness. She slipped behind the couple and shut the device off and pulled the blanket over Mr. Hollis' eyes.

Perry and LaFontaine locked eyes and LaF nodded in solidarity. Neither girl needed to know about that right now. It was a happy moment in a sea of misery. Carmilla stood up, and grabbed Laura's hand so she could slide the ring on her finger, but instead Laura wrapped her arms around her tightly. Carmilla, who had heard the heartbeats stop a long time ago, quickly spun the girl away from her view of her father, who was silently crying.

"Laur? Honey?" Carmilla whispered into the brunette's hair. Laura smiled and nodded quietly back.