His first big corporate trip, All expense paid vacation with one minor bit of business to attend to and then hotel bar, beaches and now he was sweating, and not because of the tropical heat, but because the man sitting across the table from him, he just made everything so difficult and it didn't need to be.
The deal was all worked out and it was more than anyone had hoped for, more than they could have reasonably expected. The guy was guilty as hell. So, all things considered, John had been looking forward to the trip,
including the half hour he figured it would take to have the guy sign the paper, then he would thank him profusely and buy him a drink. But it wasn't working out that way at all.
John took out his cell phone and made a call, last resort, a continguency he had thought was simply corporate over-kill, but now? What the hell else was there to do? "Ahh, I ...We might need you after all, We seem to be talking at cross purposes"
"No, we are not talking at cross purposes, We are talking at NO purpose. You offered me a deal, I said no, That's it.
There is no ..."the door opened and House smiled. He'd been right. Wilson was close. why he hadn't just come in with the punk lawyer in the first place? Later for that.
Wilson didn't look at him, instead he took the papers from the kid, looked through them, as if he didn't already know every sentence, every comma and semi colon by heart.
"Give us a minute" he said quietly.
"NO, NO, NO, do not give us a minute, That's how he always starts but then the minute turns into hours and ..." House did look frightened, his eyes bulged and his hands were gripping the table like it was a his last hope.
This was even weirder, John had not idea what was going on. Wilson was a doctor, this guy's friend, the one who had pushed everything through and now?
John got up and walked out of the room. Let'em go at it. He really didn't care anymore,
"My arms fine by the way" Wilson still flipping through the papers.
"Oh god, here we go, I thought we'd already talked that one to death" House shut his eyes.
"The deal looks fine, I had my own lawyer look it over. You'll do time, a month at Greenlawns which is basically a country club, then 300 hours community service, I think they made that as high as they could so they can keep that clinic opened. And" now Wilson looked up "an anger management course, and you're done."
He threw the contract on the table, "Sign it and I'll start making arrangements to get you home"
"No"
"Of course," Wilson sat down. A deep, poor put upon me sigh, "The jail part is going to be hard,"
No reaction from House.
"Community Service it'll be like doing clinic duty at the hospital only easier, You'll be running the place in no time."
Still no reaction,
"The anger management? You're refusing because of the anger management..:" the look at on House's face comfirmed it.
"I don't need anger management" House challenged. looking him straight in the eye, Daring him to argue.
"YOU DROVE A CAR INTO A HOUSE"
"ONCE"
Wilson got up. He went through all the "Wilson" moves as House sat watching, checking off each one in his mind. "Pinch the nose, didn't think he'd open with that one, Now the neck rub, Five deep breaths, look around the room like he is completely lost, blink twice Now hands on hips and we're off"
"Give me your cane." he held out his hand.
"What?" Ok, this was unexpected
"Your cane, Give me your..." Wilson didn't wait for him, He just reached out and grabbed it,
holding it like some kind of mallet.
"You're going to hit me with my own cane."
"ONCE" Wilson held his stare. "Now sign the damed papers"
How long they looked at each other was debatable. Wilson said it was over in a few seconds, House claimed to have held on for almost two minutes, but he did pull the papers over in front of him and he did pick up the pen,
but it stopped there
"You won't hit me" he smiled "You're Wilson, You are psychologically incapable of hitting anyone." he put the pen down and pushed the the papers away. Leaned back and folded his arms across his chest, It was over, A cheshire cat smile and a victory gleam in the eyes.
Wilson lowered the cane and sat down. Then slowly reached out, picked up the pen and began signing the agreement.
"What the hell," House sounded angry for the first time "You can't sign my name to ..."
"You can sign my name to prescriptions, I can sign yours to court documents. John" he yelled at the closed door, "We're done"
John must have been standing right outside because he was in the room in a split second, He took the papers from Wilson, making sure not to make eye contact with Dr. House. Then, he froze. God just when the thought it couldn't get any worse, it did.
"This isn't Dr House's signature." he didn't sound as if he were talking to anyone, just making a statement, like "its Friday"
or "my career is over".
"Yes, it is, just fax them back to you office and I'll go make arrangements for our flight" Wilson was heading for the door. House still staring at him with what looked to be equal amounts of respect and resentment.
"Do you have any idea what will happen to you?" John was almost in tears. This was not going to be easy to explain to the home office. "You forged court documents, the penalty alone, not to mention they're useless.
You could do time, you could..."
"Its my signature" House now was smiling, all resentment gone, all that was left was respect
"Excuse me, Dr. House" John started, "I've seen your signature and this isn't it"
"My hand fell asleep that's why it looks strange, I'll sign it again, underneath if you want" he reached out and John slid the papers over to him. Pretty sure the second, legitimate signature would trump the fake one.
As soon as House was done John grabbed the papers, his brief case and practically knocked Wilson over trying to get to the door.
Wilson sat down, from the inside breast pocket of his jacket he took out a small flask and smiled.
House took a deep drag, let the single malt lay quietly in his mouth before swallowing it down in one big gulp
"You're damned lucky you live on the third floor"