I own none of the characters. They belong to Joss Whedon
Cordy looked at her watch. She was running so late, and it didn't help matters that traffic was moving along like a snail. Actually, a snail would have been faster at this point in time. Angel would be waiting for her at the bluffs because he was always so damn prompt.
"Dammit" she thought to herself "Why did I have to change my shoes 4 times? Angel doesn't care about what shoes I wear"
Cordy's stomach was turning. She was a bundle of nerves. Cordelia Chase has always been a very confident woman. She was never one to second-guess any decision that she has ever made. If she did second-guess her choices, she may have never left Sunnydale. If she never left Sunnydale she never would of gotten reacquainted with Angel, she never would of gotten the visions that have helped save countless lives, she never would a become half demon, she never would of done the good that she has done, and most importantly, she never would of fallen in love with Angel.
When she was in high school, she had images of falling in love with a CEO of a very large and profitable and company and her adult life would include shopping, manicures and pedicures. Her other dream was to become an actress. Thanks to Skip, her demon guide, she had chance to live that dream and she hated it. She felt so empty and very superficial. All right, Cordy is a superficial person, but when she was an actress she felt even more superficial, if that is possible. So many things have changed since high school. All she cared about now was helping people and being with Angel.
Angel. The man of her dreams expect for fact that he is not a man. He is dead. He is a vampire. Oh My God! She is in love with a vampire, but he is not just any vampire. He is a, or better yet, THE vampire with a soul, that wonderful soul who makes him the most wonderful dead man that she knows. Things between them started out innocent enough. They were just friends. They soon became best friends, but when you have seen as much pain, death and destruction as they have, it does have a tendency to bring people closer. Then somewhere along the line their friendship turned into something more. Well, at least it did on her part.
So when did the feelings of friendship develop into something more. Cordy could probably pinpoint it to the night of the ballet. WOW!! After the experience in the dressing room Cordy started looking at Angel differently. Boy could he kiss. The true turning point was when Gru came from Pyleia to see her. During their trip to Mexico, they only slept together 1 time and during that encounter, she thought only of Angel. After that she realized that she couldn't lead Gru on so she faked her period and sweet Gru didn't realize that a woman's period doesn't last 2 weeks. Cordy knew that she couldn't go any farther until she knew how she really felt for Angel, but Gru made the choice for her. He saw how she looked at Angel. He saw and made Cordy see that she is love with Angel.
The only downfall to loving Angel would be the whole no sex thing. If they were to make love the one moment of perfect happiness will turn the man of her dreams into the man of her nightmares. Gone would be the man of her dreams and hello to the evil, people drinking, terrorizing, Angelus. Now, like any other hot blooded woman, Cordy enjoys having sex, but for some reason just the thought of Angel knowing that she loved him and hopefully, him loving her back, and just holding her at night while she slept would be enough for her. In fact, it would be just perfect.
Cordy could see the bluffs straight ahead. She knew that tonight her life would most definitely change. Whether her life would be ruined or all of her dreams would come true still remained to be seen. She was so nervous. She was going to tell Angel that she loved him. As Cordy pulled into the bluffs she kept repeating the same thing in her head.
"I love Angel." That repeating phrase did somewhat help calm her.
As she pulled up to the lighthouse she began to panic again. She did not see his car. Cordy got out of her car and slammed the door.
"Dammit, Dammit, Dammit" she yelled "I don't even like these shoes.
Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. She clenched her fist, and spun around, prepared to deck whoever thought that it was okay to interrupt her private sulk fest. As she spun around she looked right into the most beautiful brown eyes. She immediately unclenched her fist and breathed out his name "Angel"