Mitchie's Story

AN: Hey Everyone,
This story is to give a little back ground information for one of my other stories Charlie's Story.
I am undecided if I want to leave this as a one-shot or follow the story lines of the Charlie stories through Mitchie's point of view, so send me a review and let me know what you want me to do.
I hope you like it.
Princess Kay :)

My name is Michelle (Mitchie) Torres. As far as messing up goes I am an expert, no really I practically have a PhD. I always manage to turn it all around though, so I guess I deserve a PhD in mess resolution as well. Or not, this time I have really messed up and there is no going back, ever.

Let's start this story at the beginning and where else would my story begin than at Camp Rock summer music camp two years ago when I was just an innocent fifteen year old.

Then I had brown boring hair and matching brown boring eyes. I was nothing special a no one really, but I did learn to like it that way. Everyone that has ever heard me sing disagrees though; they think I am someone pretty extraordinary. That's why after last summer (my second at camp rock) I signed a recording contract, enabling me to write and record my music. I put the contract on hold for twelve months through, to organise my studies and mature. Well that's what everyone except a select few think. I'll get back to that in a minute.

First you need to know that whilst at my first year at camp rock I met a boy, not just any boy the one and only rock star Shane Gray. To say I developed a crush on him would be an understatement. I fell head over heels in love with him over that summer and miraculously he fell in love with me too. It was my very own Cinderella story, a dream come true. We kept in contact through out the year, emails and telephone calls late into the night. By the next summer I was dying to see him again and he seemed just as eager to see me. Point blank we took our relationship too far that summer, taking a leap into something neither of us was ready for. It was almost thanksgiving before I began to really panic, I had just signed the music contract and had been under a little stress lately, that's what I told myself at least. Over and over again I tried to convince myself I was just stressed and that once I had adjusted my body would too, a nagging voice in my head seemed to enjoy reminding me that I had never asked if Shane had protection that night. My best friend Sierra was the first to notice, she caught me being sick in the school bathroom before class for the third day in a row and practically dragged me to the school nurse. Before she could knock on the door I stopped her though. She was being a good friend; she must have thought I had developed an eating disorder or something.

"Wait Sierra, I'm not sick… I think I'm pregnant" although I had shouted the first bit at her, for the last bit my voice dropped to barely a whisper. Her eyes widened and she took a step away from the door. Her silence was killing me; it was pure torture waiting for her to pass judgement over me.

"Oh… well um… then I guess… I guess we should go talk to your mom" I started shaking as she choked out those words. I couldn't go to my mother and tell her, that her sixteen year old only daughter, her innocent little baby was going to have a baby! Was Sierra insane! No of course not Sierra was responsible and intelligent which is why she would never get herself in the messes I did. What was insane was that I found myself nodding, agreeing to go and talk to my mother. We skipped that day of school; I was surprised when Sierra suggested it. I rehearsed my confession a million times on the walk home, every combination of the words tasting bitter on my tongue. When we got home mom was in the kitchen cooking up a bunch of biscuits for her catering job the next day.

"Mitchie! What's wrong? Are you sick honey?" she fretted dropping the flour coated rolling pin and hurrying to my side. My head was spinning and the queasy feeling in my stomach was returning. She placed her hand on my forehead, checking for a temperature, gently pushing back some hair while she was at it. Tears welled in my eyes; I twisted my fingers together and bit my bottom lip, fidgeting in anxiousness.

"Mom, I've really messed up" I sobbed completely throwing the script out the window and allowing her to pull me into a loving embrace.

"What's wrong baby, you can tell me anything remember?" her brown eyes searched mine as she pulled away directing us to sit down on the couch in the living room. Sierra stayed sitting on my other side like a loyal friend.

"Shane and I got carried away this summer… mom I think I might be pregnant" I sobbed the whole time I forced that sentence through my lips. But I really lost it when I saw the instant look of disappointment that took over her face.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry" I began to repeat again and again until she stopped me.

"Ok well I'll call the doctor see when is the earliest we can get you in, then we will talk to your father and decide what we are going to do" she said her tone was almost automatic, like she was reading from a queue card. There was no emotions no indication of how she was truly feeling, after that brief flash of disappointment her face had gone blank and remained that way. I couldn't stop crying the tears just kept falling. An hour later we were visiting a doctor two towns over mom had the sense to think about what would happen if people at school found out. Sierra tagged along promising to stay with me no matter what. Mom took my hand firmly in hers, in a sign of comfort and support. Glancing around the waiting room all I could think about was that this just didn't happen to people like me, I was the quiet loser who nobody knew. I wasn't the sort of girl who was asked out by boys or drank a little too much at a party and let a guy take advantage of her, Man I wouldn't even get invited to a party where that could happen! No I was the stupid girl who willingly gave herself to the boy she loves before either one of them was ready to even acknowledge the possible consequences. I spent the long time in the waiting room staring at my feet; the walls were covered in pregnancy posters. My stomach sank when the doctor confirmed my worst fears, politely explaining my options to us.

"You are still early enough to terminate the pregnancy but after so many weeks that wont be an option any more" she explained seriously in a sweet soothing voice. Hearing those words come out of her mouth pulled me out of the deep fog of thoughts I was in. My head shot up and my eyes darkened, I stared the woman forcefully in the eyes.

"No" I was surprised by the loudness and clarity of my voice. Mom and Sierra looked at me a little shocked with my out burst.

"I could never do that, it may not be planned or exactly wanted but I will not end this, I will not kill this child" tears for once did not pour from my eyes, instead I glared angrily at the doctor for even suggesting such an idea. I understand that for some people abortion is the right decision, and in many cases it is the right thing to do for the child and the parents. But although unexpected the baby forming in my stomach was created out of love and one way or another it will get a loving home and family, even if I have to give up my dreams and raise it alone. My mother let out a small gasp in the silent room. I hadn't even realised it till I followed her gaze to my belly, my hand had naturally fallen there and was gently caressing the skin where the baby was growing. My baby and Shane's baby ours, a physically small but undeniably large repercussion of our love. When we arrived home mom rang dad and insisted he get someone to cover his shift at the hardware store and come home. The look of worry on my fathers face when he saw me sitting on the couch next to Sierra in tears was heartbreaking, he was just as concerned about me as mom and I had betrayed them. I waited for my father to yell and scream and tell me how much he hates me but he didn't, he took a deep breath paced the room then hugged me. Whispering in my ear that everything would be fine and we would sort it out. It was more painful than the yelling, I wanted him to get mad. I stayed silent while mom explained that there was no way I could have an abortion, it maybe be the right option for some women but not for me. That still left me with two other options one I put the baby up for adoption, two I keep it. Sitting around the dining room table that night it was decided the best option seeing as no matter what I was still going to go through with the pregnancy was for us to go and spend a few months at grandma's house. Mom and dad were trying to protect me from all the kids at school finding out. I was already just over three months pregnant, I could probably go to school for another month but after that it would just be too hard to hide. Mom gave me a sympathetic smile before turning to share a glance with dad.

"Honey we know this is going to be hard but you really need to tell Shane" Dad's tone was just as sympathetic as mom's face. I adamantly shook my head at them, this decision I had made during my time of silence.

"No, I cant do that to him, he has just sorted out his life, he has his whole career ahead of him, I cant and wont take that away" I said forcefully. Mom and dad looked at me questioningly.

"Mitchie, this child is his responsibility too and what about your future?" my mother pointed out but I was set firm.

"I know, but he isn't ready to be a parent nor am I for that matter, but he has a choice one I am going to make for him, Shane will not find out about this until I am ready to tell him" I ranted hoping to get my message across to my parents. As long as they accepted my terms Shane needn't ever find out, because I have no intention of ever telling him about this. Thankfully they both nodded.

"It's your decision, Mitchie" dad told me rubbing my arm reassuringly. I attended school for just two more weeks after telling my parents. Sierra promised to tell no one and to come and visit as often as she could. Over thanksgiving a single I had long ago recorded with Shane was released. Our 'this is me, gotta find you duet' from my first year at camp rock. People from school quickly caught on that it were me performing with legendary hottie Shane Gray and that we knew each other. After just two days of being badgered for his phone number and strangers trying to be my best friend I freaked out, begging mom and dad to let me leave school even earlier than we had already planned. With everything that had been going on inside my head I just could not deal with people throwing Shane's name in my face all day. I had stopped all communication with him and my friends from camp rock, deciding it was the best way to ensure he never found out. Leaving school meant leaving Sierra too and soon I found myself completely friendless and more alone than ever.

We moved to Texas, telling everyone my grandmother was unwell and we were going to stay with her so we could help her out. We lived with her for a year. In a place no one knew me I was free to stop hiding so shamefully. By the time I was six months pregnant we had all relaxed and were enjoying the pregnancy. Mom began taking me shopping for baby, stuff. I allowed myself to become excited as we picked out a cute t-shirt that read I have the worlds best Grandma. I spent most mornings studying so I wouldn't fall behind at school and most afternoons resting in a rocking chair on the back decking. My favourite book Charlotte's Web in hand and a thick blanket draped over me. As rain fell against the tin roof. Life was comfortable, relaxing and simple. However my mind wandered over all the dreams and aspirations I had been so close to having that had now gone. No record label would sign a teenage mother. Although I am not a bad person, a pregnant teenager is hardly a choice role model. Which is what you become when you are famous, a role model. I had almost accepted that I would be giving up my dream when on a random bad day mom put forth a shocking proposition. She and dad would raise my baby as their own so that I could continue to live my dreams. Mom and I had driven to the local shops to buy a few things. I was in the snacks aisle searching for my newest addiction snickers chocolate bars. A few teenage girls came in to the store giggling; they hurried to the snacks aisle and began to debate over what they wanted to buy. I smiled at them watching on rather nostalgically. Three months ago that had been Sierra and I. One of the girls saw me watching and nudged her friend. I looked away my cheeks turning pink; embarrassed I had been caught staring. The second girl pretended to sneeze choking out the name slut as she did so. Her friends began to giggle again as she gave me a satisfied smirk. With hormones and emotions running rampant through my body it was only seconds later that a tear fell from my eyes. The girls giggled at their joke as they left, mom rounded the corner she had witnessed the whole thing. It took me hours to convince her I was ok.

"Mom this is how it is going to be from now on, I just have to get tough and deal with it."

I didn't agree to my parents offer at first, I told them it was ok I understood what I was giving up and I accepted it. They told me to think about it. It wasn't until I was in the hospital holding my precious tiny little daughter that reality hit me. I sat there holding the warm little bundle in my arms; she was so small, so perfect. I could already see so much of Shane in her. She was my little baby girl and I owed it to her to do what was best for her. I couldn't stop crying, mom and dad grinned as they walked in, holding balloons and presents.

"It's completely normal to cry, Mitchie, this is a very emotional time" mom told me as I sobbed about how I couldn't stop. I kissed my daughters forehead, brushing my finger across her tiny pink cheek. The next morning I was much calmer.

"Have you given her a name yet?" a nurse asked as mom and dad entered she was checking my blood pressure which had been rather high all night. They had had to give me something to try and bring it down. I glanced at my parents.

"Yes, have you named our granddaughter yet?" Mom pushed. The nurse scooped her up and handed her to me.

"Don't let her get up; her blood pressure is still too high" the nurse ordered leaving the room and taking my chart with her.
"She's been complaining about my stupid blood pressure all morning" I whined rolling my eyes. I had been woken up at five to feed my daughter and visiting hours didn't start till nine, in this time I had had four visits from that same nurse, fussing over my blood pressure.

"I want to call her Charlotte, Charlotte Marie Torres" I declared shifting her in my arms as she became grizzly. That's the name that went on her birth certificate along with my name. Shane's did not, I left the father blank. Shane was at the peak of his fame and I couldn't risk it. All that mattered was that I knew who her father was.

"That's beautiful Sweetheart" my mother replied taking a seat on the end of the bed.

I smiled down at my Charlotte, who knew you could love someone you had only just met so much. I heard a camera click and my head snapped upwards to see my father smiling at me, the camera in hand.

For the first four months of my daughter's life I was her mother, I fed her, I changed her diapers, and I woke up with her during the night. It was exhausting. I was irritable, tired and stressed all the time, even with my parents help and support. I was falling seriously behind in my school work because I was just too busy and tired too keep up and I began constantly wondering what my life would be like if I had accepted my parents offer. It was 1am on Thursday night when I finally cracked. It had been a very long day, Charlotte was over tired. She had been very clingy, crying every time I put her down. I was tired; I hadn't showered in two days because I couldn't be apart from her long enough to. I had been pacing her room with her in my arms for hours, scared that if I stopped she would begin howling again. My arms were aching, she now weighed a healthy 11.8 pounds and being asleep she was a complete dead weight in my arms. Finally I felt relaxed and confident enough to softly lie her down in her cradle. The second my hands broke contact with her body she startled awake with a shrieking cry. My hands rushed to cover my ears.

"Please Charlotte just go to sleep, Shhh!" I whispered desperately my tone harsh and frustrated. I slowly began to back away from the cot shaking my head. I couldn't think Charlotte's cries echoed through my brain. I felt the solid wall behind me and pressed my back against it, as if begging it to swallow me up. I fell to the floor burying my head in my knees.

"Be quiet!" I shouted staring angrily at up at the cradle. Then I burst into tears, I had just shouted at my daughter, an innocent little baby. She didn't mean to cry, she was just as tired as I was. Guilt flooded through me, I just sat there on the floor in shock. I clearly wasn't ready to do this. What parent yells at an infant? Mom entered the room just moments later. She hurried over to me placing a kiss on my forehead.

"Go sleep my darling" She instructed helping me to my feet. She moved over to Charlotte taking her in her arms and quickly settling her. I stumbled still crying to the bathroom and took a long hot shower. I brushed my hair, changed into some clean pyjamas. Staring at my reflection in the mirror, it was still me Mitchie, still the sixteen year old invisible school girl. I looked really tired purple bruising under my eyes which were red from crying and sleep deprivation. I was a little chubbier, still carrying around a fair amount of extra baby weight. I knew right then that I had no business being a parent. I was still a child.

The next day I was lying on the living room floor watching a kid's movie that was playing on television. My head resting on a small pile of cushions, my legs bent so that my feet were flat on the floor. Charlotte was sitting on my stomach. Her back and head supported by my thighs, her feet resting on my lower ribs and my hands holding hers by her sides to keep her balanced.

"Aren't you a little old for this rubbish?" Dad grumbled when he entered the room and saw what I was watching. Everyone had been a little bit irritable with a new baby in the house; no one really gets a good night sleep.

"I'm not watching it, Charlotte is" I grinned smartly, Charlotte was too little to actually watch television. . Dad rolled his eyes but sat down on the sofa and began to watch with us. I stared at the beautiful child in front of me. She had grown out of her baby-ness and now looked more individual. Her eyes were with out a doubt Shane's, it was almost painful to look at them. I could see me too though, her hair was closer to my colour than Shane's and her nose kind of looked like mine. It is a little hard to tell because she is so small.

"Mom can you come here please, I wanna talk to you and dad" I called for my mother. Carefully sitting up and switching off the television. Mom entered the room wiping her hands on a tea towel and sat down on the armrest of the sofa.

"Seven months ago you and dad offered to raise Charlotte, did you mean it?" Mom and dad looked at each other then at me carefully like they were trying to work out where I was taking this.

"Of course we did" I nodded I had expected that answer.

"Do you still mean it?" I pushed. My parent's eyes widened.

"What are you really asking here?" my father said his expression serious and so it should be this was a very serious conversation. I took a deep breath; I could feel tears prickling my eyes.

"I wanna move back home, I wanna go back to school…" I paused a choking sensation was building in my throat and I felt a hollow ache in my chest. I am doing the right thing. I told myself. I had no business being a parent. I should leave this to the professionals, my parents, why screw up my poor daughters life by pretending I can raise her.

"Take her, I'm not ready to be a mom" I begged her crying so hard I was struggling to breath. Mom carefully scooped up my daughter mostly, I think out of fear I would drop her. I was shaking and felt sick but I knew I was making the right decision.

"Darling, you're emotional and tired and this is a very big decision, sleep on it" Dad insisted as mom rocked my daughter gently. I shook my head.

"I have given this a lot of thought dad; this is what is best for Charlotte…competent, loving parents. Not a clueless and single teenage mother" I said my voice come out much more confidently than I expected. Dad reached out a hand and rubbed my back.

"Please, do this for me. I am sure that it is what I want." My parents nodded, agreeing with my decision.

After the first few months we moved back home, telling people she was my mothers, meant I had to step back and let mom be the mother. It was so hard, I had had months to bond with my daughter then suddenly she wasn't mine, anymore. Leaving for school on my first morning back at home I was awake at five am. This was Charlotte's routine feeding time. I awoke fed her, changed her and was trying to settle her back to sleep when mom woke up. Her little head was resting against my right shoulder, my right arm holding her in place against my chest while I paced the room tidying it up and singing to sooth her to sleep. Mom walked over to me holding out her hands for Charlotte. I gave her a smile letting her know I had everything under control. She shook her head.

"You have to get ready for school" she commanded taking my daughter from me. I unwillingly handed her over and went to get ready for school. I caught the public bus to school it allowed me to leave a little later; I usually struggled to make the actual school bus. I snuck passed mom and into Charlotte's room before I left, I kissed my finger tips and pressed them to her cheek.

I sat on the public bus behind me were a bunch of my fellow students laughing and shoving each other, I should have belonged to that group but I felt a stronger connection to another passenger. In front of me I could see an expecting mother balancing a laden stroller and a messy toddler. She looked tired and frustrated, reminding me of feelings I knew all too well. I smiled at the cute toddler instantly thinking about my daughter and finding the need to text my mother to check on her. I shoved my Ipod in my ears trying to flush out the now crying toddler and my laughing class mates with the sound of Shane's voice. While Shane's voice on my ipod was strangely calming it also bothered me had I done the right thing by not telling him? Maybe if I told him we could do it together, raise our daughter that is. No I couldn't do that to him, or the band.

Mom replied as I arrived at school.

Everything is fine, I know this is hard but you need to let me be the mom. I rolled my eyes she had no idea how hard this was. I gulped a big breath of air before pushing open the main doors and entering the familiar territory that was my school.

Returning to school everything felt different, sort of like I had stepped back in time. The buildings were the same, as were the people but I was so very different. I went to the office to collect my new timetable and locker, students moved around me with out a second glance reminding me I was invisible. To be honest it was comforting but then I entered homeroom just a few minutes before the bell. Kids stared but not because I had been pregnant no they stared because I was the girl whose duet with Shane Gray reached an amazing number 3 on the nation's pop charts just a few months ago. I was the girl who disappeared just as quickly as she rose to fame, the girl who is suddenly the number one topic of gossip and rumours around the school. School was awful that first week. As if I hadn't felt like an outcast before now was so much worse, all the trivial things the girls at school talked about, seemed so beneath me now, I had matured in ways they couldn't imagine yet I looked no different. To them I was just like them. But who had worn the trashiest out fit to last week's party and who had kissed who while their date was in the bathroom didn't matter to me. I was secretly worrying about losing the baby weight I had gained and hoping that Charlotte wasn't in too much pain as she began teething.

Thankfully I wasn't there long just two months later my record contract came back into affect and I demanded I go back to being home schooled.

Life became easier as I became busier I saw Charlotte less but I still thought about her a lot. When ever I thought about her my thoughts tended to wander to Shane. Those thoughts were just as painful.

I spent a lot of time on tour and travelling to Los Angeles which kept me away from home. She was four when I came back from a big tour ready to tell my parents to back off and return my daughter. I was older and more mature now, I had experienced life and felt ready to deal with it. She came bounding into my arms as soon as I opened the front door and chatted constantly all evening till she fell asleep, a big smile on her face and her big brown eyes glowing with happiness. Shane's eyes, my heart physically ached looking at just how much she looked like him. Her hair was darker now more like his.

"I can't do this anymore, I'm older in a better place now" I declared as I was helping my parents do the dishes. My parents shared a knowing look like they had been waiting for it, expecting me to change my mind.

"She is so young, Mitchie, you'll confuse her" Dad reasoned calmly, stacking up some dry plates.

"Exactly she is young, it's better to do it now then when she is eight or nine, she will adjust easier now" I exclaimed dropping my dish towel to the counter top, I was determined to get my daughter back. That was my sole purpose for being there that night. I had spent an entire tour thinking it over carefully. I needed my Charlotte back.

"You need to think about what is best for Charlotte" my mother joined the debate, turning off the tap to turn and face me.

"I am her mother I know what is best for her and that is to be with me" I informed them curtly. I was getting angry and emotional they didn't appear to willing to see things my way.

"You are never here Mitchie! You don't know her! You have no idea what is best for her!" Mom cried her hand slapping the counter top to emphasis her statement. I shook my head, like she was crazy or had no idea what she was on about. I stood tall and looked my mother directly in her eyes.

"She is my daughter, I could take her right now and not even the police could stop me" I growled out threateningly. I suddenly felt like a momma bear on one of those animal shows, when her cub is in danger. I was four years older, I was ready. I needed this. My parents looked stressed and unwilling to back down either.

"I can go to my lawyers and force you to give her back if I have to" I warned not taking my eyes off mom; I knew I would lose against dad.
"Woah, no need to get all public and messy about this, lets just sit down and talk" Dad insisted gesturing towards the kitchen table. I shook my head becoming increasingly annoyed. They had no right to keep her from me.

"Hearing those words come from your mouth proves to me, just how unready you still are to be a parent" mom declared frowning at me, I scoffed. Like she really had any intentions to give me back my daughter.

"Dragging that gorgeous little girl through the stress of a confusing and what will no doubt be a highly public court case! Not to mention what you would be doing to Shane, haven't you been keeping this from him to benefit his career?" She ranted pointing out the effects of my potential actions. I sighed dejectedly.

"I just feel like such a bad mother, I can't care for her, I'm not around. I just wanted to change that" I whispered my eyes cast downwards to my feet. Suddenly my mother was holding me tenderly in her arms.

"But you are a good mother; you have given her a loving stable home, and you got her into that great elementary school" mom soothed brushing a strand of hair out of my face and behind my ear. I had used a few business connections to get Charlotte accepted at the best elementary school in the area, then gave my parents access to a bank account in her name, with enough money to help them raise her.

"You're right you do know what is best for Charlotte and you gave that to her when you gave her to us." Dad smiled proudly at me.

"And being your parents we know what's best for you, maybe you should go back to LA for a while, get away from the reminders, focus on your career" Mom won, convincing me to move away.

Distance was great it made things easier; I could almost pretend I didn't have a daughter. I received emails and letters from mom and dad regularly with photographs of my Charlotte, copies of her school report cards, and pieces of artwork. Charlotte grew older and so did I. When I was thirty one I was offered an opportunity I could not turn down. A summer job at Camp Rock, it had been a long time dream of mine. With this offer came a decision. Charlotte was now fifteen and it was time to tell her the truth. I arranged with camp director Brown Cessario for one more camper to join this year's intake, and then I rang my parents. I asked them to pass on my invitation to Charlotte to spend the summer at camp with me. I told them I wanted her to see camp rock and that I wanted to spend some time with her and multiple other reasons. It took mom all of two seconds to catch on to my real agenda. She tried to talk me out of it, but dad stopped her. I think he knew that both Charlotte and I were ready for the family secret to come out. Receiving a text message from mom the next day had me doing cartwheels. Well not real cartwheels because I can't actually do cartwheels but I was really excited. Charlie said yes. Was all it said, my Charlotte would be coming with me to camp rock.