Otis Joins the Milidairy
It was an ordinary day on the farm. Otis was munching on some hay, pip was trying to steal cheese, and the farmer was preparing to milk Otis. When they arrived at the barn, Otis saw a poster on the wall. It read "Join the military and fight terrorists who harm livestock!" Since otis was a cow, he did not know any combat skills. He decided to join anyway to protect innocent farm animals. When he arrived at the recruitment center, they decided to test him. in hand to hand fighting, Otis used Cowrate to beat the tester. he was allowed to join.A week later, they had to test his shooting skills. Using his special udder cannon, Otis destroyed the paper target in a matter of seconds. He was given a special gun that attached to his udder, the Dairyton Assault rifle. He did not like the way it attached, but he had to deal with it.
Otis was given a special assignment in the field. He was to act as a Cowmando, going deep behind enemy lines to perform top secret missions. He was sent into the dangerous territory. The meat factory! When he arrived, he started planting explosives to destroy the place where so many of his kind before him had been murdered He used his lacto powers and gun to take out several enemies. but they kept coming and coming. and his milk supply was running out After a full hour of dispatching enemy guards they shot him with a tranquilizer gun right in the udder. He fell senseless to the ground.
Otis awoke in a dark room, surrounded by masked men. Several torture tools were laid across a table including a cattle prod. One man grabbed a branding iron. "Tell me how many soldiers are with you, or this goes on your udder."
Otis shook his head. The man nodded, and three seconds later, there was a picture of Dickbutt burned into his udder. The smell of cooked meat filled the room and Otis winced. He let out some milk to cool the burning sensation. Next the man demanded to know where his headquarters was. he zapped him with the cattle prod again and again, and cut deep wounds into his steaming flesh with a butcher's cleaver.. He lost an udder in the process. His4 stomachs were nearly spilling out of the the hole in his gut where the udder was missing. Otis's chest was becoming closer and closer to being Filet Mignon. He could't do anything about it because his hooves were tied down. Then the man got a bottle of mad cow disease and carved a hole right into his chest with a steak knife. He then slowly poured it into Otis's system. Otis used the last few squirts of his infected milk to poison the man with his disease.
"OOOOOHHH NOOOOOOEEEEESSS" the man yelled. "I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC! AND NOW I MIGHT HAVE MAD COW DISEASE! AAAAAGGHHHH! IM MELTING IM MELTING IM-"
The man in the corner shot him.
"SHUT UP TED! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!"
Otis used the steak knife to cut himself free, and used his Tai Cawn Do to take out the man in the corner, He managed to limp away from the factory before collapsing. With some of his last strength, he took out the detonator to the explosives, and pressed the button. The actory exploded, killing everyone inside and ending the horror of the mass killing of his many cow friends. Suddenly, it started to rain cooked steak from the sky, the cows inside must have been cooked from the heat of the explosion. Otis thought. And they were delicious! Otis accidentally ate one by opening his mouth and he enjoyed it! Medium rare. as he lay there, a helicopter arrived to pick him up. the soldiers inside were holding dinner plates out the window. "Well done Sergeant Cow. This steak is excellent."
In the next story, we will hear about how Otis becomes a cownibal. Like Shia Labeef.