1
I never knew being an angel, I could… hyperventilate, I could panic. My hand shook as I pressed the top of my palm to my lips. I feel his presence behind me as well as the gentle flapping of his onyx wings. I slowly began to shake my head.
"You lied to me." I whispered.
"I did it to keep you safe." he said, his voice deep and drenched with authority, usually. But with me there was always a softness, a gentleness.
"You should have told me what you knew immediately so I could have made my choice with all the knowledge." I said facing him now. His steel blue eyes hurt to see me in such pain.
"I was… afraid you would reject the bond." he said. I shook my head.
"So you made the decision for us both, you manipulated our bond." I said, my voice cracking and he shook his head taking a step closer to me, but I raised my hand and he paused in his movements.
"I did not want you to be in pain when you crossed over. I wanted only for you to know happiness, love. Everything I felt for you was real- not manipulated and everything you feel for me-"
"Has changed." I said, my voice hard. His eyes flexed some and he shook his head slowly, his cheek twitching some.
"Would you have rather me taken you by force? Treated you just like my other soldiers?" he asked. I shook my head.
"You could treat me like your soldiers, but you would never force me and anger Father." I said. His body tightened visibly and he just titled his head some looking down at the ground beneath our feet.
"What will you do now?"
Getting straight down to business, as he should. I stared at him now, thinking of his touches, his lips against my flesh.
"This lie is too great for me to bare. I have always been truthful with you and you have repaid me by keeping this secret from me."
"Do not do this."
"We will forever be paired, by our spirits. But at this moment, I am choosing to separate from you until I am ready to speak to you…"
My eyes snapped open and a gentle gasp escaped me. Another dream, replaying that night. God created everyone in pairs. Everyone has someone. Even in his holy kingdom, we are paired. When you die and are accepted into his kingdom you ascend out of a large pool of holy water your newborn wings attached and your acceptance immediate. I was led to believe my rebirth was beautiful, like all the others. But that's when the lie was born. I feel a soft and run over my side as I am pulled into the body of Garret, the human I have married since I came to Earth. He's kind and a car salesman and he likes to please me. I don't have to work, which was probably for the best. Although he could never truly be mine, I accepted him. I rolled over onto my side and looked at him. I have seen his heart and it is kind and caring even after having a horrible child hood, his feelings and emotions are real. He has soft curls and caramel skin.
I have strong feelings for him.
"Mm good morning." he hummed, trying to rid the sleep from his tone. I smiled and leaned in kissing the tip of his nose.
"Good morning." I replied softly. Father knows I am here, he knew my heart and has turned a blind eye while I tried to find purpose in my life once again, since it was apparent I never had one to begin with.
"I dreamed of you last night." he said. I smiled a tired smile.
"And what was the dream about?" I asked. He grinned more.
"I dreamt we were traveling the world, seeing everything we could see. We eventually have some kids and grow old together." he said. Simple but elegant and beautiful. I smiled some.
"A dream that can become a reality." I replied and leaned forward kissing his soft lips. I made him a bacon and egg omelet with toast and orange juice. He entered, pressing his white glasses to this face.
"Honey is my tie alright?" he asked. I looked at him and examined him. He was in a nice black suit and the tie was perfected it. I nodded.
"Your tie is perfect." I replied and he smiled and kissed my lips quickly.
"Breakfast was delicious. I'll pick us up some dinner on the way home, any suggestions?" I shook my head.
"Surprise me." I replied.
"Alright. Love you dear." he called as he reached the door.
"Have a good day!" I called and watched as the door closed. I was along in this big house, with nice furniture and glass walls that showed the trees behind the house. I moved upstairs and jumped in the shower. The water was soft against my dark curls that curled up at the top of my bottom. Showers. I had learned to love them immensely since I arrived here.
Nola…
I paused in my bathing and looked around upon hearing the soft voice around me. I looked up at the steam that disappeared into the marble ceiling. I ignored the voice and continued bathing. Once I cut the shower off, I got out and fixed my hair and moved to my bed room to put a robe on. But a figure on the balcony made me jump and yelp. My eyes widened at who it was. I hurried to put my robe on and moved to slide open the door. I remained in the doorway thought.
"Michael." I said softly and the blonde angel stared at me with soft eyes.
"Nola." he acknowledged. I looked him over noticing the tight armor that fit his body perfectly. His wings folded down and cupped together behind his back. I stepped out onto the balcony, not wanting anything celestial in my home.
"What are you doing here?" I asked lightly and he looked my balcony over some.
"What are you doing here?" he asked back. I crossed my arms some.
"Experiencing a human life." I stated. He nodded looking me over, not use to such a imperfect form. He looked back at me with understanding eyes.
"You're upset with me, with Gabriel, with Father. We have hurt you and so Father has allowed you to live life on earth and return home when you please, but he has not restricted Gabriel from coming to you." he said. I bit the inside of my cheek knowing this information well. Mated pairs are not ever to be restricted from one another.
"Yet Gabriel didn't come here for me. You are here. Which means he expects me to come home to him first." I noted. He shook his head.
"Nola you've taken another mate. Right now, Gabriel is not in his right mind to see you. He is upset and angry and sad that you have done this." he said and I nodded slowly.
"I guess we are even in our betrayals." I said. Michael shook his head.
"That's such a humanistic way of thinking." he said and I sighed gently.
"Yes. I know. But I told him I will return when I am ready." I said.
"And you are willing to just leave this human and return home?" he asked. Now the thought sounded easier said than done.
"I will return when I am ready." I replied. He nodded once more.
"I am always here for you." he said. "I can imagine Gabriel will be showing himself sometime soon. I hope you two can speak. There has been talk amongst the other angels and archangels." I looked him over curiously.
"What talk?" I asked. The look in his eyes showed worry.
"That maybe Father is losing faith in mankind." he said. I stiffened at his words for mere talk was still talk. I could feel it in my body that something may be happening in Heaven now.
"Last time he lost faith, he sent a flood." I replied gently remembering the day it happened. She watched from above as she heard their screams and their cries for help. Men, women, children, the animals and other wild life. I was not a soldier and felt great sadness for their deaths. Gabriel comforted me, even though I knew he was looking down as well with no sympathy in his eyes. We were created to love them, but he reminds himself daily that he was also created to obey. If something as catastrophic like that were to happen again, there would be no way Gabriel would stay away.
"If you are all commanded to do something, he will come. I am sure he will." I replied. Michael nodded.
"He is hurting because you are hurting. Remember that when he comes to you." he said and placed his hand on the back of my head and pulled me in so that our foreheads could touch. In that brief interaction, I could see flashes of Gabriel, destroying his lodge. Grunting and yelling anger from not being able to be near me. We slowly withdrew from each other and Michael turned and took off into the sky disappearing into the clouds.