A.N: No Edward/Leah love. Just a little talk between them. :D
It was during one of those rare times that I was allowed to take Renesmee to see Jacob that I discovered Leah's talent. I decided to walk near the Tribal School when I heard a faint playing coming from inside the building. Inside, I found Leah sitting on a bench in front of an old worn grand piano. She moved her long fingers gracefully, hitting each key with the utmost precision. Eyes closed, body swaying slightly, a precious flower moving in the wind. The emotion that rang out through the empty room was awe-inspiring while at the same time heart-wrenchingly painful.
I stared at her in shock. This couldn't possibly be the same girl who just the other day told me I was wasting my time playing an instrument I could never truly master. This girl seemed so at peace and the more I heard her play, the more lighthearted the pieces became.
I shut the door loudly, announcing my presence to her. I half expected her to turn around and lash out at me, but she didn't. A truly dedicated person doesn't let amble noises interrupt their concentration. It takes true passion to block out everything around you and focus solely on the music.
Very carefully, I sat down next to her on the bench while she continued to play on. As the minutes went by, I could almost hear the story in the notes she played. It began cheerfully and joyful, the sounds of laughter filled my mind with various images painted by her song. The carefree feeling continued on until it changed suddenly to a more sullen and distressful sound. The tears and heartbreak much too apparent behind my eyes until it changed once again to a brash and furious sound. I could almost feel the frustration trying to break free from my mind and make itself into a living being. Finally, the sound changed into something much more somber but yet it still sounded distressed.
I opened my eyes to see Leah's fingers in the same position as the final notes she played. Her head was slightly hung, bangs hiding any view that I had of her eyes. Then, she looked up and turned to peer at me from under her feathery lashes.
"I…I never knew that you could play so well. It was…beautiful." I commented after a few silent moments.
She sighed and stared at the ceiling. "Yeah…not many people know. It's not like people really bother to know much about me. Mom put me in lessons when I was younger and the teacher said I had an unnatural talent from the very beginning. I had to stop after a few years because my parents didn't have enough money to pay for any more lessons."
"Oh." I responded dumbly. "When did you start playing again?"
She stood and walked to a nearby window. "Two months before Sam left me. I had a fight with my mom and I just wandered around the rez until I ended up here. I hadn't played in a while but I needed some way to vent and I just…played. I was a little rusty at the beginning but after awhile it just came to me. As natural as breathing."
"You should let the others hear you play. I think they'd be pleasantly surprised. You're truly amazing when you play." I suggested sincerely.
She ignored me and turned to stare at me. She stared so intensely that I felt like she was staring into my very being. I felt so vulnerable under her gaze. I hadn't noticed before, but I couldn't hear her thoughts. Her mind was completely blank. I shifted uncomfortably and looked away from her burning gaze.
"Remember when I told you how you were wasting your time playing the piano when you'd never really master it?" I nodded. "Do you know why I said that?" I shook my head.
She sighed. "You play to play, Edward. When you're playing something from Bach or Chopin, you hit the notes and your family claps and smiles erupt on all of their faces. They praise you for playing such a wonderful piece and some of them wish they could play like you. But you're just playing to play. You don't feel the emotions that each piece holds, you don't immerse yourself completely. Your body sways slightly and you seem to have a look of concentration on your face, but you're just a robot hitting notes that you were taught to play in a particular order."
I furrowed my brow. "That's not true."
"Yes, it is. It's true even in the pieces that you've composed yourself. You're a vampire so everything you do is that of perfection. I bet that everything you've ever composed you've done on the spot and never experimented on trying to make them sound better. Everything you've ever done is final and there's no room for improvement. You don't leave room to pour out your soul onto the sheet music.
"You've never spilled tears while playing, you've never played for hours on end until you've fallen asleep on top of the keys, you've never finished a piece and felt yourself shaking from the sheer emotion that you just unleashed. That's why you can never master this instrument. You don't have the heart or the soul for it, Edward, and you never will."
I was angry. How dare she accuse me of not having the talent for it! Who did she think she was?!
"Oh really? Then tell me, Ms. Clearwater, why do you play? You say I don't have a heart and I lack a soul, but as far as I know, you're as heartless and soulless as I am. So please, enlighten me. Tell me how you don't 'play to play'."
She looked away. "Because it's all a mask, Edward. A simple mask that, if anyone actually had the courage, could be broken down. It's the mask that keeps me from falling apart."
She pushed herself off the wall she was leaning on and walked towards the door. Before she went through the door, she turned to look at me and spoke barely above a whisper.
"Playing the piano is they only time when I can let everything out. It's the music that saves me from being broken. It's the only time when I'm not."
After that day, I rarely ever touched the piano.
Piano = Love