What's shakin peeps? My name is Murgatroid (don't judge. It was my grandmothers name...just kidding) and this is my first ever fic. I hope you guys enjoy it, and I would love it if you guys gave me your feedback. Anyway, on with the show!

High school sucks.

It's a known fact.

Once you enter it, your life is a never ending cycle of pure un-adulterated torture (with the occasional sloppy joe on the side). Seriously, here is a quick summary of my life: Wake up, eat some tostitos while I cruise around town with my smexy Prius (Yeah, all dem ladies practically throw themselves at its fuel efficient glory), go to the dungeon (which is highschool), come back to my crappy apartment and pass out on the floor, and the cycle repeats.

There are only three things that keep me from staying at home and drowning myself in cheetos:

My best friend Armin

The authorities

And the fact that I like my rocking hot body

But I digress. What I'm trying to say is, I need some adventure to break this cycle of torture. Adventure that comes in the form of a creature known as a womans.

I know, I Know, you're probably thinking, "Oh my god Eren, you're already such a McStudMuffin! Just go get yourself a womans and move on with your life!

Well random viewer, I think you totally overestimated my ability to interact with the opposite sex.

I can't talk to girls.

Seriously. When a girl even tries to make conversation with me I either end up stuttering a few words (If I'm lucky), or I power walk away while silently apologizing. It kinda goes like this:

Random girl number 1: "Hey Eren, can you help me with this chem problem?"

The Scared Yeager: "Y-Y-Y-Ye...I COME IN PEACE! AHHHHHHHH!" *power walks down the hallway with purpose and pizzazz* "I'mSorryI'mSorryI'mSorry..."

...Eh, you get the picture.

So, you can naturally assume that I only hang out with other guys. They're in the same boat as me, and I'm comfortable with them...NO, I know what you're thinking; I am not into the dudes. You totally don't understand what its like. Girls are like... wild stallions. If you approach them the wrong way, they will get antsy and kick your face off... Okay, maybe it doesn't go exactly that way, but my point is: girls are freaking scary. Only a very courageous idiot would try to tame one of these majestic beasts.

Sadly, I fall into that category. I, Eren Yeager, am not one to turn down a challenge. That is why I have dedicated my high school career to finding a girlfriend.

So far, my closest attempt to 'taming' one of the females was with a girl named Annie. I was able to give her a piece of paper with the fee of only a choked out whine that kinda sounded like a dying eagle. Oh yeah! leveling up in life.

So I guess that brings me to where I am today, sitting in my AP chemistry class waiting for my teacher to throw worksheets on the geometric arrangements of atoms in my face. Forewarning everyone, my teacher Mr. Shadis (aka Sergeant), was in the marines. So, you should be expecting a lot of yelling, sweating, and crying. If it's a really bad day, maybe some squats and push-ups. Oh and one more thing, he likes to- "MAGGOTS! GET ALL OF YOUR BEAUTIFUL ARSES INTO YOUR DANG SEATS! WE GOT FRESH MEAT TODAY! ESPECIALLY YOU MR. YEAGER, YOUR ARSE IS ESPECIALLY BEAUTIFUL TODAY!"-make things really awkward. Note to self: avoid crazy ass teacher. I was about to occupy myself by looking out a very interesting window, until I saw it. The most beautiful creature to have ever walked this earth. It was a girl, no, a damn fine lady. She was of Asian ethnicity, her short ebony hair stopped just below her chin, her eyes were a smoldering ash, and her face resembles that of a princess's. I was too busy admiring the beauty that I barely noticed Mr. Shadis start to introduce her.

"THIS IS MIKASA ACKERMAN. SHE JUST MOVED HERE. YOU KIDS PLAY NICE, AND HELP HER WHEN SHE NEEDS IT! OK ACKERMAN, SIT NEXT TO BEAUTIFUL ARSE OVER THERE!" He then pointed at the chair next to me. It wasn't until she started walking towards me did I start to have an inner turmoil.

'Oh god she's walking in my direction. OK, OK, you can do this Eren, just try not to stare and all you have to do is say hi. You can do this.'

At least I thought that, until I heard Sergeant yell, "YEAGER! STOP DOING YOUR BEST IMPRESSION OF A DYING FISH AND SHUT YOUR DANG TRAP! YOU'RE LETTING FLIES IN THERE!"

Dang. It.

Mission failed. She probably thinks I'm some type of dumbass. My only thought is "Ugh, why god, whhhhyyyyy?" I proceeded to then repeatedly slam my head into my desk, until the sound of angel stopped me. I looked over and saw that the angel, I mean super hottie, I mean Mikasa, was giggling. I made her laugh!

This was my chance. I can totally play off what just happened. Just say hi Eren.

I slowly turned my body towards her. Took a deep breath and said "HiMyNameIsErenAndYou'reRealFine!"

"….."

"..."

Fuck my life. That's it Yeager. God gives you a second chance, and you just crap all over it. Well, goodbye Angel. It was nice showing you my best impression of a snake unhinging its mouth. I hope I'll see you around.

My pity party was broken with a soft, but surely spoken "Haha, it's a pleasure to meet you too Eren and you're not bad yourself." she winked.

I stared at her wide eyed. YEEEEEESSSSSSSS! Score one for the boys back home!

With a new found confidence, I extended my hand and was about to re-introduce myself... Until I got a face full of geometric arrangements.

"YEAGER! STOP FLIRTING WITH MIKASA AND GET YOUR BEAUTIFUL ARSE TO WORK!"

Great. This is going to be a long year.

…..

Well, that's all for now folks. Until the next chapter! (and thanks Talon!)