Some People Call Me a Space Cowboy
By ChibiMan
Not a sequel to A Trigun Halloween so much as a follow up in a series of fics. I decided to start writing in script format, so if you can't read a script . . . go away! This little story takes place after Escape from Pain and before Diablo for Trigun. As for Bebop, a year and a half before the start of the series; so no Ein, Faye, or Ed.
Disclaimer: I do not own "Trigun" or "Cowboy Bebop". Come to think of it, I also don't own Jurassic Park, "Robotech", KFC, "The Sims", or any other product . . . damn!
[blah blah]=thoughts
(blah blah)=action during dialogue
Rated PG-13 for language.
Spoilers for Vash's arm and a bit on his past.
In space drifts a rusted old ship, called the Bebop. In fact it's drifting awfully close to a swirling hole in space and time!!!! So the proximity alarm is going off causing Spike Spiegel, famed intergalactic bounty hunter, to wake up from underneath a pile of newspapers on the couch. Spike sits up and, still half-asleep, throws his shoe at the speaker, breaking it. The shoe then bounces off the speaker and hits Jet Black, who was snoozing in a nearby recliner, in his sleeping, bald head.
Jet: (still half asleep)What was that?
Spike: (also still half asleep) Sorry, the proximity alarm was going off. Apparently, we're too close to a wormhole or something.
Jet: (closing his eyes) Oh.
Both: (Jumping up) Wormhole!!
The famed bounty hunters both start running for the controls and manage to trip over each other on the way.
Computer: Contact with wormhole in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . .
Jet slams his fist down on the button for the reverse thrusters.
Jet: (sighs) Whoa, that was close.
Spike: I'll say, another second and we would've been chucked through time and space ending up god knows where.
The computer then begins to beep.
Jet: Huh? We're picking up a transmission through the wormhole, sound only.
Spike: Well, let's hear it.
Jet punches up the transmission. All can be heard is static, but slowly a voice creeps through.
Radio Voice: In the news today, the town of October has been heavily damaged after Vash the Stampede rampaged through the streets. Final count: 7 buildings destroyed, 83 injured, and 0 dead. And as a reminder to all you bounty hunters out there, the reward of 60,000,000,000 still remains for anyone who brings Vash the Stampede in to the Feds. (trails off to static)
Jet: Sixty . . .
Spike: Billion . . .
The Bebop blasts through the wormhole at full speed, entering a swirling tunnel of energy.
Spike: Sixty billion, can you believe it! With money like that we can retire!
Jet: That's if we can get back through the wormhole.
Spike: Hell, even if we can't we'll have enough money to life of luxury no matter where we are!
Jet: True that!
Spike: Hey, we're comin' out of it.
The ship exits the tunnel of energy and finds itself just outside the atmosphere of a huge desert planet.
Jet: Whoa . . .
Spike: You mean people actually live on that!
Jet: It's probably some new colonization thing. That transmission we picked up said the last town that this "Vash" trashed was called October. That is our only lead.
Jet begins to type on the computer, trying to look up directions. Frustrated, Jet punches the counsel.
Jet: Damn it! This piece of crap is calling this an unregistered planet! That wormhole must have thrown us through time as well as space . . . Hell, it could even be another dimension for all we know!
Spike: The thing could've thrown us in to Oz for all it matters. We still aren't any closer to that big bounty.
Jet: You're right, we can worry about quantum physics after we're rich enough to hire a team of scientists.
The Bebop enters the atmosphere and is descending to the surface.
Jet: There's a town a few miles from here. I'll land outside of town so not to draw any unnecessary attention. We don't know what kind of technology these people have and we don't want to scare em' 'kay, Spike? (Looks around and Spike is gone) Spike?
Spike tears out of the hangar on The Bebop flying the cherried-out Swordfish II Spike does a barrel roll and heads for the town as the Bebop touches down.
Jet: So much for not drawing attention to ourselves. (wipes sweat on brow) Damn, it's hot on this planet.
Inside of a saloon a bartender is carefully wiping the bar when a loud crash is heard outside followed by a lot of commotion and then Spike enters the saloon, sweating profusely.
Spike: Hey barkeep!
Mr. Bary-bar-bar-bar: (eyeing the newcomer)What the hell was all that racket?
Spike: Racket? Oh, that was just me parking. (takes a seat at the bar) Listen I'm from out of town and I was wondering, where is the city of "October"?
Bar to the bar to bang de bang: October!? You got quite a trip ahead of you, it's about three thousand iles to the east! It's the one that's still all tore up after a hit from "The Humanoid Typhoon".
Spike: Three thousand, you said? (gets up) Okay, thanks for the info. (as he is walking for the door) Iles . . . ? (shakes head and shrugs)
Spike heads out the door and the bartender watches him go. A few moments later Spike rips past the door inside the Swordfish, the bartender's mouth falls open.
Spike: (inside the cockpit, he fiddles with some knobs) Oh blessed air conditioning!!
-October-
Jet and his ship the Hammerhead are in October and chatting with a bandagey guy who points west indicating the direction in which Vash took off.
-Tonim Town-
Spike and Jet go enter the local tavern/hotel. They run up to the barkeep.
Spike and Jet: BOOZE AND ICE!!!
The barkeep quickly gets them each a large glass of alcohol with lots of ice which the two quickly press against their heads.
Spike and Jet: ahhhhhhh . . .
Jet: Okay, listen up barkeep. We've been to three different cities today asking this question: Have you seen a tall blonde guy in a red coat with a big silver handgun?
Barkeep: Yeah. He checked in just last night. (Spike and Jet both look very relieved and happy) But then he checked out this morning.
Spike: (grabs the barkeep) ARE YOU SAYING THAT VASH THE STAMPEDE SLIPPED THROUGH OUR FINGERS AGAIN!!!!?????
Barkeep: That was Vash the Stampede!? Oh my god! (Spike lets him go and slumps onto his stool) Well he was headed north if that helps at all. Also, he had two girls with them although one was yelling at him a lot and the other one was looking kind of hopelessly at the other two.
Spike: Two girls . . .?
Jet: You don't think . . .?
Spike and Jet: Hostages!
The two of them dash out of the bar as fast as they can. Spike jumps into Swordfish II while Jet goes to the Hammerhead.
Spike: Jet, go back to the Bebop and then follow the Swordfish's homing beacon. Get all the artillery; if what we hear was right we'll need all of it just to stop this guy.
* * *
Vash, Meryl, and Millie are walking through the desert. Far behind them you can see the smoking remains of a car and a bunch of injured bandits around it.
Meryl: Because of you, Mr. Vash, our car is destroyed and we must once again walk through the desert into the next town!
Millie: Now, now, Meryl. It's not Vash's fault that a bunch of bandits attacked.
Meryl: YES IT IS!! They attacked because he's (shouting at the top of her lungs) VASH THE STAMPEDE, THE MAN WITH THE SIXTY BILLION DOUBLE-DOLLAR BOUNTY ON HIS HEAD!!!
Vash: Jeez, lower your voice. Do you want every bounty hunter within a thousand ile radius to come pouring out here!?
Meryl: YES! Maybe one of them will finally succeed and get you out of my hair once and for all!
Vash: You-you loudmouth!
Meryl: Troublemaker!
Millie: (trying to get them to behave themselves) Calm down now.
Vash: Tightwad!
Millie: Please . . .
Meryl: Freeloader!
Millie: Stop . . .
Vash: Priss!
Millie: (heavy sigh and falls over)
Meryl: Scoundrel!
Vash: BITCH!
Meryl: (vein pops) THAT DOES IT!!
Meryl pulls out two derringers and puts one to Vash's head and another to his neck as Vash simultaneously whips out his pistol on her and points it at her head. Millie backs up on the ground afraid that this is going to turn into a large gun battle.
* * *
The Swordfish II roars over the desert. It passes over the destroyed car and a few dunes and spots the three figures. He sees that two of those figures are in a standoff.
Spike: Got here just in time, (smirks) now to save the day.
Spike fires down a burst of machine gun fire near Vash causing all three to duck for cover.
Meryl: (as the Swordfish flies not very far overhead) What the hell is that?!
Vash: Some kind of ship!
Millie: Whatever it is, it certainly doesn't like us!
Vash: You two, give me some room; he's coming back around.
Spike turns around to come for another pass. Vash is now standing still and holding his gun. Spike fires his machine guns sending two lines of bullets on either side of Vash whom doesn't move and inch. Vash raises his gun and fires one shot as Spike passes over him.
BOOM!
The engine catches on fire and ship quickly loses altitude and crashes into the sand. Spike is now pressed against the glass of the cockpit. Spike grabs the radio.
Spike: Jet! Get here quick!! He just downed Swordfish with one bullet!! (pulls pistol out of his holster hanging on the latch to the cockpit) I'll try and hold him off 'till you get here.
Jet: (over radio)Wait, Spike! Spike!! (Spike hangs up the radio)
Spike then kicks open the door and jumps out. He then runs to face Vash and he stops just ten feet of him.
Spike: (points pistol) Vash the Stampede, I'm here for the bounty on your head. I'd ask you to come along peacefully, but I'm guessing from your reputation you won't.
Vash looks all serious and toughlike as he puts on his glasses. He raises his gun to point at Spike when Meryl and Millie jump in front of him guns aimed at Spike. Both Spike and Vash look rather surprised.
Spike: A-Accomplices!
Meryl: You have no idea how hard it was for us to find this guy!
Millie: We're not letting you get a step closer to Mr. Vash!
Vash: Didn't you just say, a moment ago, that you wanted a bounty hunter to come and get me?
Meryl: (anger mark) . . . Fine then! (grabs Millie and drags her away) Come on Millie, Mr. Hot-Shot can deal with this guy all by himself. He doesn't want any of our help!
Vash: (pleading) It's not that I don't want help it's just that (he's cut off by a bullet that whizzes past his head)
Spike: Listen, I don't know what's going on between you and your short girlfriend and I don't care!! (Meryl: I am not his girlfriend!) All I care about is the fat bounty on your head, now let's go!!!
Spike fires two quick shots at Vash and he watches as Vash brings up his gun and uses it to block the bullets and then shoot his gun twice in less than a second. One shot goes through Spike's poofy hair and the other halves Spike's cigarette. Vash then smiles at Spike.
Spike: (spits out remains of cigarette) Shit. (looks at his gun) This'll be useless, you've clearly got me out-matched as a marksmen. (chucks gun to the side) But how about we try things my way. (goes into his ready to kung-fu pose) What do you say, up for the challenge? (smirks)
Vash spins his gun on his finger and then slams it into his holster. He then tosses his glasses and Walkman to Millie.
Vash: Hold on to those for me, I don't want them to get damaged. (Turns to face Spike) Okay, we'll do this your way. (Vash begins doing stretching exercises)
Spike: (sweatdrops) What the hell do you think you're doing!?
Vash: What? Stretching is important, I don't want to pull a muscle during this silly little Bruce Lee exploit of yours.
Spike: Now your dissing Bruce Lee!? THAT"S IT!!!
Spike runs at the smiling Vash. As he approaches Spike goes into a jump kick which quickly wipes the smile off Vash's face as he ends up sprawled on the ground.
Vash: (wipes a trickle of blood from his mouth) [Wow, this guy actually knows how to fight, didn't expect that.]
Vash rolls away as Spike smashes his foot down where Vash's head just was. Vash gets back to his feet and does a mid-air roundhouse Kick when Spike runs at him. Spike is sent to the ground but quickly leaps to his feet.
Spike: [Wasn't expecting a match!]
Spike attempts a hard kick to Vash's head, but Vash blocks with his left arm. He then strikes Spike hard across the face, sending him back to the ground.
Millie: (Cheering) Yeah, that's the way Mr. Vash!
Meryl: Knock his @$#%ing teeth out!!
Both Vash and Millie looked shocked at Meryl whom blushes. Vash looks back just to see Spike's shoe as it connects with his face. Vash flies backward and hits the ground hard. Spike grins and both girls look worried. Vash then leaps back to his feet and put his fists up. Just then all four of them are distracted as the Bebop flies over and lands nearby. Jet comes running out of the ship carrying a flame-thrower, an Uzi, two pistols in leg holsters, and a net launcher strapped to his back.
Jet: Spike! (Sees his partner looking a bit beat up so he points the two guns he's carrying at Vash.)
Spike: No Jet! He's mine! You just make sure his harem over there doesn't do anything.
Jet: Are you sure?
Spike: Yeah, he insulted Bruce Lee, it's personal. . .
Jet starts to walk to the girls but falls over from the weight of his weapons. Meryl and Millie go over to him.
Millie: Are you okay Mr. Bald Bounty Hunter? (helps him up as Meryl helps him take off the large net launcher.)
Spike: (sweatdrops) God, you people are weird. So shall we continue?
Spike rushes Vash and hits the ground doing a low spin kick sweeping Vash's legs from under him. Vash then flips backwards onto his feet to avoid being smashed by Spike's foot again. Spike then goes for a hard punch to Vash's face, but Vash veers his head to the side and Spike and Vash find themselves nose to nose.
SMACK-O!
Vash delivers a powerful head-butt to Spike which sends him sprawling and clutching his head.
Vash: (whining) Are you done yet; I'm hooooot!
Spike: (leaping to his feet) I'm just getting' warmed up!
Despite the situation, the two smile at each other and go into another set of kicks, punches, and blocks.
-An Hour Later-
Vash and Spike are still going at it in the background. In the foreground Jet offers the girls some smokes. They both refuse and Jet shrugs and lights one for himself. All three are obviously bored with the fight going on behind them as does a black cat with large green eyes standing next to Jet.
Jet: So what is you guys's deal anyway? Are you just some trouble makers out to create anarchy throughout the planet or something?
Millie: Not at all actually.
Meryl: My partner and I are official representatives of the Bernardelli Insurance Society as disaster investigators. Our current assignment is to monitor Vash the Stampede and prevent him from doing further damage.
Jet: (watches Vash deliver a brutal kick to Spike's head) You're doing a bang-up job.
Meryl: Hey, he's not damaging anything.
Jet: Except my partner's face . . .
Millie: Hey, who are you guys anyway?
Jet: Oh, I haven't introduced myself. I'm Jet Black owner of the Bebop, that fine ship over there. It's a pleasure to meet ya'. And the guy who's got your um, friend in a headlock is my partner, Spike Spiegel. We're bounty hunters.
Vash breaks free of the headlock and delivers a few punishing blows to Spike's midsection.
Jet: (rubs face) Ohhhhh, this might take awhile. Do you two want to come aboard my ship? We've got plenty of drinks if you don't mind alcohol.
Millie: Oh, I'm in!! (runs for the ship)
Kurneko-Sama: Nya!
Meryl: (following) Hey, Millie go easy on it this time.
Millie: (to Jet whose opening the door) While we're here, Meryl and I can tell of all of our wonderful adventures with Mr. Vash. He's not actually as bad as people say he is, you know.
Meryl: (pushing Millie through the door, the cat following her) Yeah, he's a lot worse. . .
-Three Hours Later-
The suns are setting. Vash and Spike are facing each other, standing next to the Bebop, both looking badly beaten and are bleeding. Vash walks over to Spike and takes a swing, misses, and doubles over laughing. Spike also starts to laugh and they both collapse sitting against the Bebop.
Vash: How's your eye? (indicating Spike's almost swollen shut right eye.)
Spike: It's all right, it's not real. How's you arm? (indicating Vash's left arm which looks kind of bent.)
Vash: It's okay, it's not real either.
Vash pulls the mechanical part out of the socket and shows it to Spike before sticking it back on. The two began to laugh maniacally. (See when Vash first met Wolfwood to get the idea.)
Spike: (pulls out a cigarette and lights it) I'm going to take a wild guess and say that the rumors about you aren't entirely true. But what I don't get is why you don't just tell everyone that you aren't the monster they depict you as. I mean all this wandering. . . where are you going?
Vash: (looks kind of sad for a moment) To answer you're first question; I'm not entirely sure they're wrong about me. I know I did something bad, I just can't remember what. Which brings me to you're second question; I uh, . . . I remember this guy he, um, did, something. Something terrible . . .
Spike: What, did some light-blonde haired guy take your woman away from you?
Vash: (Looks shocked) H-How did you know?
Spike: (puff) It's a common scenario . . .
Vash: So I'm looking for this guy in hopes that he might be able to clarify a few things for me and then . . . I guess I'll just see what happens. Anyway, enough about me, what's your story bounty hunter?
Spike: . . . (puffs)
Vash: Some light-blonde haired guy take you're woman away from you?
Spike: (smiles) Like I said, it's a common scenario.
Jet comes out of the ship and calls down to them.
Jet: Hey, you two done fightin' yet?
Spike: Yep, I suppose it was a draw . . . (smiles at Vash) this time.
Jet: Vash, you and your friends are welcome to stay the night if you promise not to blow the place sky high.
Vash: As tempting as it is to reduce this thing into smoking ruble it might be nice to not have to sleep in the desert and worry about being eaten by Sandworms while you sleep.
Jet goes back inside as Vash and Spike help each other up and into the ship. When they get in to the rec. room on the Bebop they see several empty glasses in front of Millie and Jet sitting across from her listing intently.
Jet: Okay, I still don't get it. How did faking the kid's death help the caravan? I mean aren't they still without their pass into the city?
Millie: (a bit tipsy) Okay let me explain it to you again . . . (turns and sees Vash) oh hey Mr. Spike and Mr. Vash!
Spike goes to get some ice and as Vash goes to follow him he notices Meryl sitting on the stairs looking at him. For a moment it appears as though she's smiling at him, but then it quickly goes into her usual face of anger that's present whenever he is.
Meryl: Well, could you have wasted any more time playing in the sand with your little friend? Just look at you! You're a mess, (walks over and grabs him by the elbow) come on lets go clean you up.
Meryl leads Vash in the direction Spike went. Millie and Jet resume their story telling until they hear Vash and Meryl yelling from elsewhere in the ship.
Vash: AY-YI-Yi-Yi-Yi! Man that stuff stings!!
Meryl: I have to put it on this cut or else it'll get infected.
Spike: What a baby. . .
Vash: A baby that kicked you all over the place . . .
Spike: What was that!? I'll beat your ass anytime blondie, just give me time and place!!
Meryl: Now, now children. . .
Jet and Millie start to laugh.
-The Next Morning-
The four of them, Vash and Spike now bandaged are on the bridge as Jet explains how they got to this planet in the first place.
Meryl: So you guys aren't even from this dimension, let alone this planet.
Jet: That's the theory. We're going to head back later today. (casts a look at Millie) You know there's plenty of room on this ship . . . maybe you three would like to come with us. . .
The three look shocked and exchange looks. There's a long silence until Vash speaks.
Vash: I would love to leave this place behind, but. . .
Spike: You've got your past to take of care of first.
Vash: Yeah.
Millie: I can't just leave my family and it would be a lot harder to write them letters from another dimension. (giggles)
Meryl: . . .( casts a quick glance at Vash, he doesn't notice) I, um, can't , er, (thinks for a moment) leave the responsibilities of my job, ya know.
Jet: (glances at Spike whom smirks) Yeaaaaah, can't leave your job.
Spike: It has nothing to do with the spiky haired guy staying at all.
Vash and Meryl looked shocked at each other and then at Spike and Jet.
Vash and Meryl: (both shouting at the same time) Are you implying that . . .! Me and him/her aren't . . . ! You're crazy! I never even thought about . . .! (glares at each other) Will you shut up!?
Vash and Meryl cross their arms and look away from each other, blushing, and the rest of the group as Spike, Jet, and Millie start laughing.
Millie: Anyway, thanks for the offer but we all have things to do here. But, we would appreciate a ride to the next town.
Jet: No problem little lady, just sit tight. We'll park a few miles away from the town so not to draw any attention.
Millie: (as she gets a seat) . . . Miles?
The ship takes off and blasts across the desert less than a mile below.
Meryl: (smiling at the view) Wow, we're really flying . . .
* * *
Vash, Meryl, Millie, and the black cat walk down a ramp from the ship. Spike and Jet are leaning against a doorway smiling. As she walks off the ramp Millie turns around to look at Jet.
Millie: (waves) See you Space Cowboy!
Spike: (Waves to the three as the ramp retracts) See you Space Outlaws!
After the door closes Jet nudges Spike with his elbow.
Jet: That big girl, she digs me.
Spike rolls his eyes and walks to bridge with Jet. As the ship raises Spike looks down from the window at the three specks and makes his hand into a gun and points at the center speck, Vash.
Spike: Bang.
* * *
Vash, Meryl, and Millie watch as the ship slowly rises.
Millie: I wonder if we'll see them again someday. . .
Meryl: I told you once before; journeys are full of partings and reunions.
The girls start to walk away, but Vash continues to look up at the ship high above him. Vash makes his right hand into a gun and aims at the bridge.
Vash: Bang! Bang!
Sorry this story is so long, but I don't believe in chapters. I believe in sequels!!!
P.S. Smokin's bad, you shouldn't smoke, M'Kay. However all of the "Cowboy Bebop" characters smoke almost as much as Wolfwood whom will be in the sequel. Promise!
By ChibiMan
Not a sequel to A Trigun Halloween so much as a follow up in a series of fics. I decided to start writing in script format, so if you can't read a script . . . go away! This little story takes place after Escape from Pain and before Diablo for Trigun. As for Bebop, a year and a half before the start of the series; so no Ein, Faye, or Ed.
Disclaimer: I do not own "Trigun" or "Cowboy Bebop". Come to think of it, I also don't own Jurassic Park, "Robotech", KFC, "The Sims", or any other product . . . damn!
[blah blah]=thoughts
(blah blah)=action during dialogue
Rated PG-13 for language.
Spoilers for Vash's arm and a bit on his past.
In space drifts a rusted old ship, called the Bebop. In fact it's drifting awfully close to a swirling hole in space and time!!!! So the proximity alarm is going off causing Spike Spiegel, famed intergalactic bounty hunter, to wake up from underneath a pile of newspapers on the couch. Spike sits up and, still half-asleep, throws his shoe at the speaker, breaking it. The shoe then bounces off the speaker and hits Jet Black, who was snoozing in a nearby recliner, in his sleeping, bald head.
Jet: (still half asleep)What was that?
Spike: (also still half asleep) Sorry, the proximity alarm was going off. Apparently, we're too close to a wormhole or something.
Jet: (closing his eyes) Oh.
Both: (Jumping up) Wormhole!!
The famed bounty hunters both start running for the controls and manage to trip over each other on the way.
Computer: Contact with wormhole in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . .
Jet slams his fist down on the button for the reverse thrusters.
Jet: (sighs) Whoa, that was close.
Spike: I'll say, another second and we would've been chucked through time and space ending up god knows where.
The computer then begins to beep.
Jet: Huh? We're picking up a transmission through the wormhole, sound only.
Spike: Well, let's hear it.
Jet punches up the transmission. All can be heard is static, but slowly a voice creeps through.
Radio Voice: In the news today, the town of October has been heavily damaged after Vash the Stampede rampaged through the streets. Final count: 7 buildings destroyed, 83 injured, and 0 dead. And as a reminder to all you bounty hunters out there, the reward of 60,000,000,000 still remains for anyone who brings Vash the Stampede in to the Feds. (trails off to static)
Jet: Sixty . . .
Spike: Billion . . .
The Bebop blasts through the wormhole at full speed, entering a swirling tunnel of energy.
Spike: Sixty billion, can you believe it! With money like that we can retire!
Jet: That's if we can get back through the wormhole.
Spike: Hell, even if we can't we'll have enough money to life of luxury no matter where we are!
Jet: True that!
Spike: Hey, we're comin' out of it.
The ship exits the tunnel of energy and finds itself just outside the atmosphere of a huge desert planet.
Jet: Whoa . . .
Spike: You mean people actually live on that!
Jet: It's probably some new colonization thing. That transmission we picked up said the last town that this "Vash" trashed was called October. That is our only lead.
Jet begins to type on the computer, trying to look up directions. Frustrated, Jet punches the counsel.
Jet: Damn it! This piece of crap is calling this an unregistered planet! That wormhole must have thrown us through time as well as space . . . Hell, it could even be another dimension for all we know!
Spike: The thing could've thrown us in to Oz for all it matters. We still aren't any closer to that big bounty.
Jet: You're right, we can worry about quantum physics after we're rich enough to hire a team of scientists.
The Bebop enters the atmosphere and is descending to the surface.
Jet: There's a town a few miles from here. I'll land outside of town so not to draw any unnecessary attention. We don't know what kind of technology these people have and we don't want to scare em' 'kay, Spike? (Looks around and Spike is gone) Spike?
Spike tears out of the hangar on The Bebop flying the cherried-out Swordfish II Spike does a barrel roll and heads for the town as the Bebop touches down.
Jet: So much for not drawing attention to ourselves. (wipes sweat on brow) Damn, it's hot on this planet.
Inside of a saloon a bartender is carefully wiping the bar when a loud crash is heard outside followed by a lot of commotion and then Spike enters the saloon, sweating profusely.
Spike: Hey barkeep!
Mr. Bary-bar-bar-bar: (eyeing the newcomer)What the hell was all that racket?
Spike: Racket? Oh, that was just me parking. (takes a seat at the bar) Listen I'm from out of town and I was wondering, where is the city of "October"?
Bar to the bar to bang de bang: October!? You got quite a trip ahead of you, it's about three thousand iles to the east! It's the one that's still all tore up after a hit from "The Humanoid Typhoon".
Spike: Three thousand, you said? (gets up) Okay, thanks for the info. (as he is walking for the door) Iles . . . ? (shakes head and shrugs)
Spike heads out the door and the bartender watches him go. A few moments later Spike rips past the door inside the Swordfish, the bartender's mouth falls open.
Spike: (inside the cockpit, he fiddles with some knobs) Oh blessed air conditioning!!
-October-
Jet and his ship the Hammerhead are in October and chatting with a bandagey guy who points west indicating the direction in which Vash took off.
-Tonim Town-
Spike and Jet go enter the local tavern/hotel. They run up to the barkeep.
Spike and Jet: BOOZE AND ICE!!!
The barkeep quickly gets them each a large glass of alcohol with lots of ice which the two quickly press against their heads.
Spike and Jet: ahhhhhhh . . .
Jet: Okay, listen up barkeep. We've been to three different cities today asking this question: Have you seen a tall blonde guy in a red coat with a big silver handgun?
Barkeep: Yeah. He checked in just last night. (Spike and Jet both look very relieved and happy) But then he checked out this morning.
Spike: (grabs the barkeep) ARE YOU SAYING THAT VASH THE STAMPEDE SLIPPED THROUGH OUR FINGERS AGAIN!!!!?????
Barkeep: That was Vash the Stampede!? Oh my god! (Spike lets him go and slumps onto his stool) Well he was headed north if that helps at all. Also, he had two girls with them although one was yelling at him a lot and the other one was looking kind of hopelessly at the other two.
Spike: Two girls . . .?
Jet: You don't think . . .?
Spike and Jet: Hostages!
The two of them dash out of the bar as fast as they can. Spike jumps into Swordfish II while Jet goes to the Hammerhead.
Spike: Jet, go back to the Bebop and then follow the Swordfish's homing beacon. Get all the artillery; if what we hear was right we'll need all of it just to stop this guy.
* * *
Vash, Meryl, and Millie are walking through the desert. Far behind them you can see the smoking remains of a car and a bunch of injured bandits around it.
Meryl: Because of you, Mr. Vash, our car is destroyed and we must once again walk through the desert into the next town!
Millie: Now, now, Meryl. It's not Vash's fault that a bunch of bandits attacked.
Meryl: YES IT IS!! They attacked because he's (shouting at the top of her lungs) VASH THE STAMPEDE, THE MAN WITH THE SIXTY BILLION DOUBLE-DOLLAR BOUNTY ON HIS HEAD!!!
Vash: Jeez, lower your voice. Do you want every bounty hunter within a thousand ile radius to come pouring out here!?
Meryl: YES! Maybe one of them will finally succeed and get you out of my hair once and for all!
Vash: You-you loudmouth!
Meryl: Troublemaker!
Millie: (trying to get them to behave themselves) Calm down now.
Vash: Tightwad!
Millie: Please . . .
Meryl: Freeloader!
Millie: Stop . . .
Vash: Priss!
Millie: (heavy sigh and falls over)
Meryl: Scoundrel!
Vash: BITCH!
Meryl: (vein pops) THAT DOES IT!!
Meryl pulls out two derringers and puts one to Vash's head and another to his neck as Vash simultaneously whips out his pistol on her and points it at her head. Millie backs up on the ground afraid that this is going to turn into a large gun battle.
* * *
The Swordfish II roars over the desert. It passes over the destroyed car and a few dunes and spots the three figures. He sees that two of those figures are in a standoff.
Spike: Got here just in time, (smirks) now to save the day.
Spike fires down a burst of machine gun fire near Vash causing all three to duck for cover.
Meryl: (as the Swordfish flies not very far overhead) What the hell is that?!
Vash: Some kind of ship!
Millie: Whatever it is, it certainly doesn't like us!
Vash: You two, give me some room; he's coming back around.
Spike turns around to come for another pass. Vash is now standing still and holding his gun. Spike fires his machine guns sending two lines of bullets on either side of Vash whom doesn't move and inch. Vash raises his gun and fires one shot as Spike passes over him.
BOOM!
The engine catches on fire and ship quickly loses altitude and crashes into the sand. Spike is now pressed against the glass of the cockpit. Spike grabs the radio.
Spike: Jet! Get here quick!! He just downed Swordfish with one bullet!! (pulls pistol out of his holster hanging on the latch to the cockpit) I'll try and hold him off 'till you get here.
Jet: (over radio)Wait, Spike! Spike!! (Spike hangs up the radio)
Spike then kicks open the door and jumps out. He then runs to face Vash and he stops just ten feet of him.
Spike: (points pistol) Vash the Stampede, I'm here for the bounty on your head. I'd ask you to come along peacefully, but I'm guessing from your reputation you won't.
Vash looks all serious and toughlike as he puts on his glasses. He raises his gun to point at Spike when Meryl and Millie jump in front of him guns aimed at Spike. Both Spike and Vash look rather surprised.
Spike: A-Accomplices!
Meryl: You have no idea how hard it was for us to find this guy!
Millie: We're not letting you get a step closer to Mr. Vash!
Vash: Didn't you just say, a moment ago, that you wanted a bounty hunter to come and get me?
Meryl: (anger mark) . . . Fine then! (grabs Millie and drags her away) Come on Millie, Mr. Hot-Shot can deal with this guy all by himself. He doesn't want any of our help!
Vash: (pleading) It's not that I don't want help it's just that (he's cut off by a bullet that whizzes past his head)
Spike: Listen, I don't know what's going on between you and your short girlfriend and I don't care!! (Meryl: I am not his girlfriend!) All I care about is the fat bounty on your head, now let's go!!!
Spike fires two quick shots at Vash and he watches as Vash brings up his gun and uses it to block the bullets and then shoot his gun twice in less than a second. One shot goes through Spike's poofy hair and the other halves Spike's cigarette. Vash then smiles at Spike.
Spike: (spits out remains of cigarette) Shit. (looks at his gun) This'll be useless, you've clearly got me out-matched as a marksmen. (chucks gun to the side) But how about we try things my way. (goes into his ready to kung-fu pose) What do you say, up for the challenge? (smirks)
Vash spins his gun on his finger and then slams it into his holster. He then tosses his glasses and Walkman to Millie.
Vash: Hold on to those for me, I don't want them to get damaged. (Turns to face Spike) Okay, we'll do this your way. (Vash begins doing stretching exercises)
Spike: (sweatdrops) What the hell do you think you're doing!?
Vash: What? Stretching is important, I don't want to pull a muscle during this silly little Bruce Lee exploit of yours.
Spike: Now your dissing Bruce Lee!? THAT"S IT!!!
Spike runs at the smiling Vash. As he approaches Spike goes into a jump kick which quickly wipes the smile off Vash's face as he ends up sprawled on the ground.
Vash: (wipes a trickle of blood from his mouth) [Wow, this guy actually knows how to fight, didn't expect that.]
Vash rolls away as Spike smashes his foot down where Vash's head just was. Vash gets back to his feet and does a mid-air roundhouse Kick when Spike runs at him. Spike is sent to the ground but quickly leaps to his feet.
Spike: [Wasn't expecting a match!]
Spike attempts a hard kick to Vash's head, but Vash blocks with his left arm. He then strikes Spike hard across the face, sending him back to the ground.
Millie: (Cheering) Yeah, that's the way Mr. Vash!
Meryl: Knock his @$#%ing teeth out!!
Both Vash and Millie looked shocked at Meryl whom blushes. Vash looks back just to see Spike's shoe as it connects with his face. Vash flies backward and hits the ground hard. Spike grins and both girls look worried. Vash then leaps back to his feet and put his fists up. Just then all four of them are distracted as the Bebop flies over and lands nearby. Jet comes running out of the ship carrying a flame-thrower, an Uzi, two pistols in leg holsters, and a net launcher strapped to his back.
Jet: Spike! (Sees his partner looking a bit beat up so he points the two guns he's carrying at Vash.)
Spike: No Jet! He's mine! You just make sure his harem over there doesn't do anything.
Jet: Are you sure?
Spike: Yeah, he insulted Bruce Lee, it's personal. . .
Jet starts to walk to the girls but falls over from the weight of his weapons. Meryl and Millie go over to him.
Millie: Are you okay Mr. Bald Bounty Hunter? (helps him up as Meryl helps him take off the large net launcher.)
Spike: (sweatdrops) God, you people are weird. So shall we continue?
Spike rushes Vash and hits the ground doing a low spin kick sweeping Vash's legs from under him. Vash then flips backwards onto his feet to avoid being smashed by Spike's foot again. Spike then goes for a hard punch to Vash's face, but Vash veers his head to the side and Spike and Vash find themselves nose to nose.
SMACK-O!
Vash delivers a powerful head-butt to Spike which sends him sprawling and clutching his head.
Vash: (whining) Are you done yet; I'm hooooot!
Spike: (leaping to his feet) I'm just getting' warmed up!
Despite the situation, the two smile at each other and go into another set of kicks, punches, and blocks.
-An Hour Later-
Vash and Spike are still going at it in the background. In the foreground Jet offers the girls some smokes. They both refuse and Jet shrugs and lights one for himself. All three are obviously bored with the fight going on behind them as does a black cat with large green eyes standing next to Jet.
Jet: So what is you guys's deal anyway? Are you just some trouble makers out to create anarchy throughout the planet or something?
Millie: Not at all actually.
Meryl: My partner and I are official representatives of the Bernardelli Insurance Society as disaster investigators. Our current assignment is to monitor Vash the Stampede and prevent him from doing further damage.
Jet: (watches Vash deliver a brutal kick to Spike's head) You're doing a bang-up job.
Meryl: Hey, he's not damaging anything.
Jet: Except my partner's face . . .
Millie: Hey, who are you guys anyway?
Jet: Oh, I haven't introduced myself. I'm Jet Black owner of the Bebop, that fine ship over there. It's a pleasure to meet ya'. And the guy who's got your um, friend in a headlock is my partner, Spike Spiegel. We're bounty hunters.
Vash breaks free of the headlock and delivers a few punishing blows to Spike's midsection.
Jet: (rubs face) Ohhhhh, this might take awhile. Do you two want to come aboard my ship? We've got plenty of drinks if you don't mind alcohol.
Millie: Oh, I'm in!! (runs for the ship)
Kurneko-Sama: Nya!
Meryl: (following) Hey, Millie go easy on it this time.
Millie: (to Jet whose opening the door) While we're here, Meryl and I can tell of all of our wonderful adventures with Mr. Vash. He's not actually as bad as people say he is, you know.
Meryl: (pushing Millie through the door, the cat following her) Yeah, he's a lot worse. . .
-Three Hours Later-
The suns are setting. Vash and Spike are facing each other, standing next to the Bebop, both looking badly beaten and are bleeding. Vash walks over to Spike and takes a swing, misses, and doubles over laughing. Spike also starts to laugh and they both collapse sitting against the Bebop.
Vash: How's your eye? (indicating Spike's almost swollen shut right eye.)
Spike: It's all right, it's not real. How's you arm? (indicating Vash's left arm which looks kind of bent.)
Vash: It's okay, it's not real either.
Vash pulls the mechanical part out of the socket and shows it to Spike before sticking it back on. The two began to laugh maniacally. (See when Vash first met Wolfwood to get the idea.)
Spike: (pulls out a cigarette and lights it) I'm going to take a wild guess and say that the rumors about you aren't entirely true. But what I don't get is why you don't just tell everyone that you aren't the monster they depict you as. I mean all this wandering. . . where are you going?
Vash: (looks kind of sad for a moment) To answer you're first question; I'm not entirely sure they're wrong about me. I know I did something bad, I just can't remember what. Which brings me to you're second question; I uh, . . . I remember this guy he, um, did, something. Something terrible . . .
Spike: What, did some light-blonde haired guy take your woman away from you?
Vash: (Looks shocked) H-How did you know?
Spike: (puff) It's a common scenario . . .
Vash: So I'm looking for this guy in hopes that he might be able to clarify a few things for me and then . . . I guess I'll just see what happens. Anyway, enough about me, what's your story bounty hunter?
Spike: . . . (puffs)
Vash: Some light-blonde haired guy take you're woman away from you?
Spike: (smiles) Like I said, it's a common scenario.
Jet comes out of the ship and calls down to them.
Jet: Hey, you two done fightin' yet?
Spike: Yep, I suppose it was a draw . . . (smiles at Vash) this time.
Jet: Vash, you and your friends are welcome to stay the night if you promise not to blow the place sky high.
Vash: As tempting as it is to reduce this thing into smoking ruble it might be nice to not have to sleep in the desert and worry about being eaten by Sandworms while you sleep.
Jet goes back inside as Vash and Spike help each other up and into the ship. When they get in to the rec. room on the Bebop they see several empty glasses in front of Millie and Jet sitting across from her listing intently.
Jet: Okay, I still don't get it. How did faking the kid's death help the caravan? I mean aren't they still without their pass into the city?
Millie: (a bit tipsy) Okay let me explain it to you again . . . (turns and sees Vash) oh hey Mr. Spike and Mr. Vash!
Spike goes to get some ice and as Vash goes to follow him he notices Meryl sitting on the stairs looking at him. For a moment it appears as though she's smiling at him, but then it quickly goes into her usual face of anger that's present whenever he is.
Meryl: Well, could you have wasted any more time playing in the sand with your little friend? Just look at you! You're a mess, (walks over and grabs him by the elbow) come on lets go clean you up.
Meryl leads Vash in the direction Spike went. Millie and Jet resume their story telling until they hear Vash and Meryl yelling from elsewhere in the ship.
Vash: AY-YI-Yi-Yi-Yi! Man that stuff stings!!
Meryl: I have to put it on this cut or else it'll get infected.
Spike: What a baby. . .
Vash: A baby that kicked you all over the place . . .
Spike: What was that!? I'll beat your ass anytime blondie, just give me time and place!!
Meryl: Now, now children. . .
Jet and Millie start to laugh.
-The Next Morning-
The four of them, Vash and Spike now bandaged are on the bridge as Jet explains how they got to this planet in the first place.
Meryl: So you guys aren't even from this dimension, let alone this planet.
Jet: That's the theory. We're going to head back later today. (casts a look at Millie) You know there's plenty of room on this ship . . . maybe you three would like to come with us. . .
The three look shocked and exchange looks. There's a long silence until Vash speaks.
Vash: I would love to leave this place behind, but. . .
Spike: You've got your past to take of care of first.
Vash: Yeah.
Millie: I can't just leave my family and it would be a lot harder to write them letters from another dimension. (giggles)
Meryl: . . .( casts a quick glance at Vash, he doesn't notice) I, um, can't , er, (thinks for a moment) leave the responsibilities of my job, ya know.
Jet: (glances at Spike whom smirks) Yeaaaaah, can't leave your job.
Spike: It has nothing to do with the spiky haired guy staying at all.
Vash and Meryl looked shocked at each other and then at Spike and Jet.
Vash and Meryl: (both shouting at the same time) Are you implying that . . .! Me and him/her aren't . . . ! You're crazy! I never even thought about . . .! (glares at each other) Will you shut up!?
Vash and Meryl cross their arms and look away from each other, blushing, and the rest of the group as Spike, Jet, and Millie start laughing.
Millie: Anyway, thanks for the offer but we all have things to do here. But, we would appreciate a ride to the next town.
Jet: No problem little lady, just sit tight. We'll park a few miles away from the town so not to draw any attention.
Millie: (as she gets a seat) . . . Miles?
The ship takes off and blasts across the desert less than a mile below.
Meryl: (smiling at the view) Wow, we're really flying . . .
* * *
Vash, Meryl, Millie, and the black cat walk down a ramp from the ship. Spike and Jet are leaning against a doorway smiling. As she walks off the ramp Millie turns around to look at Jet.
Millie: (waves) See you Space Cowboy!
Spike: (Waves to the three as the ramp retracts) See you Space Outlaws!
After the door closes Jet nudges Spike with his elbow.
Jet: That big girl, she digs me.
Spike rolls his eyes and walks to bridge with Jet. As the ship raises Spike looks down from the window at the three specks and makes his hand into a gun and points at the center speck, Vash.
Spike: Bang.
* * *
Vash, Meryl, and Millie watch as the ship slowly rises.
Millie: I wonder if we'll see them again someday. . .
Meryl: I told you once before; journeys are full of partings and reunions.
The girls start to walk away, but Vash continues to look up at the ship high above him. Vash makes his right hand into a gun and aims at the bridge.
Vash: Bang! Bang!
Sorry this story is so long, but I don't believe in chapters. I believe in sequels!!!
P.S. Smokin's bad, you shouldn't smoke, M'Kay. However all of the "Cowboy Bebop" characters smoke almost as much as Wolfwood whom will be in the sequel. Promise!
